My mother has become a crazy cat lady. Help me!
December 28, 2007 9:54 AM Subscribe
My mother has become a crazy cat lady. Help me!
Let me explain:
There is a colony of feral cats living outside of her house.
Being the loving, compassionate person that she is, mom has started to give them food.
This has now progressed into feeding them 2x per day, having 2 insulated outdoor houses made for them, and now letting them jump into her lab and under a blanket so that she can pet them (this after having developed a relationship with the wild beasts over time.)
At first glance, this may seem sweet, until one thinks about how these animals are really disease carrying fleabags that will certainly multiply into additional disease carrying fleabags. Ticks, parasites (plasmosis), etc are my concern, especially since she is now coming into physical contact with the animals and then comes back into the house. Oh yeah, she prepared the food for the family. Am I overreacting by being angry at what I think is a series of progressively stupid acts? Reasoning, pleading, and the discussion of risks have fallen on deaf ears. What do I do now. Those cats have to go!
Let me explain:
There is a colony of feral cats living outside of her house.
Being the loving, compassionate person that she is, mom has started to give them food.
This has now progressed into feeding them 2x per day, having 2 insulated outdoor houses made for them, and now letting them jump into her lab and under a blanket so that she can pet them (this after having developed a relationship with the wild beasts over time.)
At first glance, this may seem sweet, until one thinks about how these animals are really disease carrying fleabags that will certainly multiply into additional disease carrying fleabags. Ticks, parasites (plasmosis), etc are my concern, especially since she is now coming into physical contact with the animals and then comes back into the house. Oh yeah, she prepared the food for the family. Am I overreacting by being angry at what I think is a series of progressively stupid acts? Reasoning, pleading, and the discussion of risks have fallen on deaf ears. What do I do now. Those cats have to go!
Some organizations will take a group of feral cats, have them fixed, then put them back. That would at least slow the multiplying problem. Should be easy to round them up once you have them all trapped in one of the outdoor houses.
posted by mikepop at 9:59 AM on December 28, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by mikepop at 9:59 AM on December 28, 2007 [1 favorite]
Er, "Humane."
posted by hermitosis at 9:59 AM on December 28, 2007
posted by hermitosis at 9:59 AM on December 28, 2007
Can you connect her up with the other crazy cat ladies? The ones who are experts in feral cats, who trap and spay, release, socialize some for adoption, etc. She can learn from other feral cat people about the risks and how to minimize problems (and she'll probably believe it from her fellow cat people).
posted by ClaudiaCenter at 10:01 AM on December 28, 2007
posted by ClaudiaCenter at 10:01 AM on December 28, 2007
Alley Cat Allies, a "National Feral Cat Resource." Feral cat programs by state.
posted by ClaudiaCenter at 10:06 AM on December 28, 2007
posted by ClaudiaCenter at 10:06 AM on December 28, 2007
Get a grip. First of all, feral cats and strays are due to irresponsible people allowing their unspayed/unneutered animals to wander, or, they have been abandoned. Their overpopulation is due to the ignorance of people. The best thing you can do to help is to help your mother catch the animals using a TNR program, such as one offered by the group Alley Cat Allies or probably through your own local Humane Society. Getting the animals fixed should be the primary objective, not making the animals disappear. It is just about impossible to make them disappear anyway, since when you clear out a batch of cats new cats will come in and fill the void. When you use a TNR program, the cats are neutered and spayed and given basic shots and they are usually ear tipped so other people know the animal has been vaccinated and neutered/spayed. There is nothing wrong with taking care of those animals, but she shouldn't let them breed so she needs to start catching them. Your local Humane Society probably has some humane traps you can borrow to start rounding them up and they can most likely put you in touch with some free or low cost neuter/spay vets.
I speak from experience. I bought in to a house that was owned by a woman over 90 years old and she did not realize 2 mother cats with litters of kittens were living under the house. No big deal, I thought, I'll bring the adorable kittens to the shelter, they will find new homes, end of story. Well, no shelter would take the kittens. Nobody in 2 counties would take them. It was the beginning of my education on the huge problem of the pet overpopulation problem in the United States.
Please do your research before branding anyone a "crazy cat lady". It certainly wasn't my choice to have a yard full of cats, but it has opened my eyes to the huge problem and after catching the ones here and getting them neutered, they haven't produced any new kittens. I do, however, continue to get abandoned adult animals that are perfectly socialized and often unneutered. They have been abandoned by people who move or drive through and dump them and they are not equipped to fend for themselves. Your mother is trying to do a good thing so let her--just make sure she starts catching them and getting them neutered/spayed and vaccinated. My cats keep the snakes out of my yard and they've caught rattlesnakes, so in my mind, they are earning their keep. They don't bother anybody else and only one of them is any good at all at catching birds. Mostly they just sleep now that they have a regular meal. I'll take a cat over a rattlesnake or rat or mouse any day.
posted by 45moore45 at 10:08 AM on December 28, 2007 [12 favorites]
I speak from experience. I bought in to a house that was owned by a woman over 90 years old and she did not realize 2 mother cats with litters of kittens were living under the house. No big deal, I thought, I'll bring the adorable kittens to the shelter, they will find new homes, end of story. Well, no shelter would take the kittens. Nobody in 2 counties would take them. It was the beginning of my education on the huge problem of the pet overpopulation problem in the United States.
Please do your research before branding anyone a "crazy cat lady". It certainly wasn't my choice to have a yard full of cats, but it has opened my eyes to the huge problem and after catching the ones here and getting them neutered, they haven't produced any new kittens. I do, however, continue to get abandoned adult animals that are perfectly socialized and often unneutered. They have been abandoned by people who move or drive through and dump them and they are not equipped to fend for themselves. Your mother is trying to do a good thing so let her--just make sure she starts catching them and getting them neutered/spayed and vaccinated. My cats keep the snakes out of my yard and they've caught rattlesnakes, so in my mind, they are earning their keep. They don't bother anybody else and only one of them is any good at all at catching birds. Mostly they just sleep now that they have a regular meal. I'll take a cat over a rattlesnake or rat or mouse any day.
posted by 45moore45 at 10:08 AM on December 28, 2007 [12 favorites]
Also, be aware that most cat diseases don't transfer to humans. Toxoplasmosis is chiefly a concern for pregnant women and it sounds like your mother is past the age where this would be relevant. Your mother needs to disinfect any scratches she gets, but beyond that, her main hazard will be from other humans jumping to conclusions about her actions.
posted by zadcat at 10:18 AM on December 28, 2007 [2 favorites]
posted by zadcat at 10:18 AM on December 28, 2007 [2 favorites]
How many cats are we talking here? Is this lab in the house, or a separate building? Is the house/lab overwhelmed with cat urine? Has the house/lab become flea-infested?
The tone of your post comes off a bit, uh, alarmist. People do have indoor-outdoor cats and yet still safely prepare food for their families, y'know? If she's gone so far as to build shelters, I don't know much luck you're going to have with "those cats have to go!"
Certainly she should seek help getting them spayed/neutered/vaccinated, of course.
posted by desuetude at 10:25 AM on December 28, 2007
The tone of your post comes off a bit, uh, alarmist. People do have indoor-outdoor cats and yet still safely prepare food for their families, y'know? If she's gone so far as to build shelters, I don't know much luck you're going to have with "those cats have to go!"
Certainly she should seek help getting them spayed/neutered/vaccinated, of course.
posted by desuetude at 10:25 AM on December 28, 2007
I think by "lab" the OP meant "lap," desuetude.
posted by Doofus Magoo at 10:29 AM on December 28, 2007
posted by Doofus Magoo at 10:29 AM on December 28, 2007
I think by "lab" the OP meant "lap," desuetude.
Oh. Duh. Well then, we're just talking about a house here, then...forget the lab part. If she's letting them inside at all? Re-reading, she could just be hanging with them outside.
posted by desuetude at 10:32 AM on December 28, 2007
Oh. Duh. Well then, we're just talking about a house here, then...forget the lab part. If she's letting them inside at all? Re-reading, she could just be hanging with them outside.
posted by desuetude at 10:32 AM on December 28, 2007
Am I overreacting by being angry at what I think is a series of progressively stupid acts?Uh, yeah. It's your mother's home, money and time. It's absolutely her decision, and as others have pointed out, she's providing comfort to cats who have been abandoned.
Those cats have to go!Why? If she gets them spayed/neutered, who are they harming? Honestly, it sounds as if you simply dislike cats and don't understand that they can be great companions. They're not necessarily the disease-carrying creatures you think they are. Your mother is obviously enjoying having them and cares for them, so what's the big deal?
posted by runningwithscissors at 10:40 AM on December 28, 2007
I also think you're overreacting. The wilder beasties should stay outside, and get neutered and have their shots, but as long as your mom washes her hands before she cooks I don't see what the concern is. The two insulated outdoor houses is a great idea. TNR and then don't worry about it.
posted by Koko at 10:41 AM on December 28, 2007
posted by Koko at 10:41 AM on December 28, 2007
these animals are really disease carrying fleabags that will certainly multiply into additional disease carrying fleabags
It's the "will certainly multiply" part that should be of concern here. If your mother isn't having these cats fixed, then she is contributing to the problem of feral cats by nourishing them and allowing them to breed. If she has them spayed/neutered, it's all good.
Honestly, mockjovial, it does rather seem as if you're over reacting. Not all stray/feral cats are the disease-carrying fleabags you hyperbolically describe, and it doesn't particularly sound like you know that these cats are parasite-ridden disease carriers either. Worry less.
posted by mumkin at 10:55 AM on December 28, 2007
It's the "will certainly multiply" part that should be of concern here. If your mother isn't having these cats fixed, then she is contributing to the problem of feral cats by nourishing them and allowing them to breed. If she has them spayed/neutered, it's all good.
Honestly, mockjovial, it does rather seem as if you're over reacting. Not all stray/feral cats are the disease-carrying fleabags you hyperbolically describe, and it doesn't particularly sound like you know that these cats are parasite-ridden disease carriers either. Worry less.
posted by mumkin at 10:55 AM on December 28, 2007
Toxoplasmosis is chiefly a concern for pregnant women and it sounds like your mother is past the age where this would be relevant.
Not true.
Any google search (or MeFi search!) on toxoplasmosis will tell you that it does indeed have behavioral effects on humans. Among other symptoms, toxoplasmosis infection has been shown to cause lonely/antisocial behavior among men, and friendly/promiscuous behavior in women. In fact, people now conjecture that toxoplasmosis gondii is at the root of the famous "crazy cat lady" syndrome.
posted by Afroblanco at 11:10 AM on December 28, 2007
Not true.
Any google search (or MeFi search!) on toxoplasmosis will tell you that it does indeed have behavioral effects on humans. Among other symptoms, toxoplasmosis infection has been shown to cause lonely/antisocial behavior among men, and friendly/promiscuous behavior in women. In fact, people now conjecture that toxoplasmosis gondii is at the root of the famous "crazy cat lady" syndrome.
posted by Afroblanco at 11:10 AM on December 28, 2007
Yeah, get them spayed/neutered, or just call animal control. Cats are #38 on the Global Invasive Species List. They may eat rats, but they also eat everything else that's smaller than they are.
posted by electroboy at 11:24 AM on December 28, 2007
posted by electroboy at 11:24 AM on December 28, 2007
Response by poster: Hi. Original poster here. Thanks for all of the answers. I guess that the post did have an 'alarmist' overtone. I didn't mean to. I reread my OP, and by lab, I meant lap. She lets the wild cats sit on her lap. The houses are large insulated, heated rubbermaid containers with a flap for them to enter and leave.
I also meant to add that I'm saddened by the fact that there don't seem to be very many bunnies in our neighborhood anymore. I know that the cats have been eating them. Birds too. And the poor squirrels!
Anyway, at the point that my mom started pulling ticks off of the cats, I started to worry that some kind of contamination could be brought into the house and cause problems not only for our domestic dog and cat, but maybe even the other family members.
I know that she is looking into a TNR program, but that seems to only satisfy the problem of more cats being born in our immediate area - not the potential diseases. So, I guess that I need to determine what the real level of 'danger' here could be.
posted by mockjovial at 11:33 AM on December 28, 2007
I also meant to add that I'm saddened by the fact that there don't seem to be very many bunnies in our neighborhood anymore. I know that the cats have been eating them. Birds too. And the poor squirrels!
Anyway, at the point that my mom started pulling ticks off of the cats, I started to worry that some kind of contamination could be brought into the house and cause problems not only for our domestic dog and cat, but maybe even the other family members.
I know that she is looking into a TNR program, but that seems to only satisfy the problem of more cats being born in our immediate area - not the potential diseases. So, I guess that I need to determine what the real level of 'danger' here could be.
posted by mockjovial at 11:33 AM on December 28, 2007
If your mom can pull ticks off of the cats, they are strays, not ferals. There is also medication that addresses fleas, ticks and now there is one that also helps with earmites and internal parasites called Revolution. It is available at the vet. Your mom can probably get a discount on the topical application flea medications for a feral colony. Depending on how many animals she has, she might want to get them treated for worms and parasites when they are sedated for neutering/spaying, and then get on a once a month regime. I can put flea medication on about 3/4th's of the cats in my yard but some are too wild to be approached.
It is simply ignorant to blame the cats for your perception that the bunny, squirrel and bird population in your neighbhorhood is dwindling. I assure you the cats were always there, it's not a recent event. Your mother feeding them allows them to congregate, but they have always been there. Dwindling wildlife can be due to other predators like dogs, foxes, raccoons and development or some disease. I see less squirrels and rabbits due to it being winter. I actually see more birds in my yard than ever before and it is because they are going for the water left out for the cats. If you want to see more wildlife, give them a water source. Otherwise, I think you are seeing your world skewed because you just dislike the idea of the cats. Don't hate the cats. Hate the people who get animals and don't spay or neuter them because they are the ones who cause this problem.
Your mom rocks. Focus on the fact she has a big enough heart to see the plight of those animals and wants to do something for them. Really, that is not a bad thing.
posted by 45moore45 at 11:46 AM on December 28, 2007 [2 favorites]
It is simply ignorant to blame the cats for your perception that the bunny, squirrel and bird population in your neighbhorhood is dwindling. I assure you the cats were always there, it's not a recent event. Your mother feeding them allows them to congregate, but they have always been there. Dwindling wildlife can be due to other predators like dogs, foxes, raccoons and development or some disease. I see less squirrels and rabbits due to it being winter. I actually see more birds in my yard than ever before and it is because they are going for the water left out for the cats. If you want to see more wildlife, give them a water source. Otherwise, I think you are seeing your world skewed because you just dislike the idea of the cats. Don't hate the cats. Hate the people who get animals and don't spay or neuter them because they are the ones who cause this problem.
Your mom rocks. Focus on the fact she has a big enough heart to see the plight of those animals and wants to do something for them. Really, that is not a bad thing.
posted by 45moore45 at 11:46 AM on December 28, 2007 [2 favorites]
She's not even letting them into the house where she lives? Aw, she's no crazy cat lady, then. Twelve unchanged litter boxes and a house that permanently stinks of cat pee is a crazy cat lady. And if these cats are climbing up into her lap, they're not so very feral.
I know that the cats have been eating them. Birds too. And the poor squirrels!
How do you know? Dead bunnies everywhere? They may just be hanging out in better-sheltered spots. (Squirrels can usually defend themselves against getting eaten by cats, though yeah, they will get chased around a good bit.) Look, the cats are roaming wild, so are the bunnies, nature will take its course. Liking bunnies better than cats doesn't mean you get to decide whether or not the rabbits get to grow fat and complacent in the yard.
Even if bunnies are awfully cute. :)
posted by desuetude at 12:03 PM on December 28, 2007 [1 favorite]
I know that the cats have been eating them. Birds too. And the poor squirrels!
How do you know? Dead bunnies everywhere? They may just be hanging out in better-sheltered spots. (Squirrels can usually defend themselves against getting eaten by cats, though yeah, they will get chased around a good bit.) Look, the cats are roaming wild, so are the bunnies, nature will take its course. Liking bunnies better than cats doesn't mean you get to decide whether or not the rabbits get to grow fat and complacent in the yard.
Even if bunnies are awfully cute. :)
posted by desuetude at 12:03 PM on December 28, 2007 [1 favorite]
It is simply ignorant to blame the cats for your perception that the bunny, squirrel and bird population in your neighbhorhood is dwindling.
Oh please. A colony of feral cats in the backyard and you want to blame foxes?
posted by electroboy at 12:22 PM on December 28, 2007
Oh please. A colony of feral cats in the backyard and you want to blame foxes?
posted by electroboy at 12:22 PM on December 28, 2007
Cats, like any other hungry animal, will kill to eat. Can you blame them?
FYI, TNR is Trap/Neuter/Return (not Release). The idea is to trap feral cats (if indeed they are feral and truly not suitable for adoption), get them neutered, then return them to their colony (not release them as strays). But a lot of so-called "feral" cats are actually simply strays or were abandoned by the ignorant or insensitive, and are quite adoptable.
Best solution: Look for a NO KILL organization in your area. They can help. Make a nice donation if you can. These people do great work and get no money. If you take them to your local shelter they will be killed immediately if they really are feral, and sooner or later if they're not.
posted by wordwhiz at 12:31 PM on December 28, 2007
FYI, TNR is Trap/Neuter/Return (not Release). The idea is to trap feral cats (if indeed they are feral and truly not suitable for adoption), get them neutered, then return them to their colony (not release them as strays). But a lot of so-called "feral" cats are actually simply strays or were abandoned by the ignorant or insensitive, and are quite adoptable.
Best solution: Look for a NO KILL organization in your area. They can help. Make a nice donation if you can. These people do great work and get no money. If you take them to your local shelter they will be killed immediately if they really are feral, and sooner or later if they're not.
posted by wordwhiz at 12:31 PM on December 28, 2007
Do you live there too? You should talk to you mom and bring your concerns to her. Also at the very least you should make sure those animals are neutered. Personally I would just call animal control, but that is insensitive, and would probably upset your mother.
Remember there are plenty of big rambunctious dogs that need adopting...
posted by BobbyDigital at 2:40 PM on December 28, 2007
Remember there are plenty of big rambunctious dogs that need adopting...
posted by BobbyDigital at 2:40 PM on December 28, 2007
Good advice on TNR, but I would also watch for signs of animal hoarding should her time and commitment to the cats significantly increase.
posted by mozhet at 3:53 PM on December 28, 2007
posted by mozhet at 3:53 PM on December 28, 2007
Mod note: a few comments removed - please stick to the "what should I do in this situation" question or take it to metatalk
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 3:55 PM on December 28, 2007
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 3:55 PM on December 28, 2007
Sounds like my neighbor. I don't really think there is anything you can really do, she thinks that she is helping. Perhaps you could point her towards a trap/neuter release program?
posted by thebrokenmuse at 5:14 PM on December 28, 2007
posted by thebrokenmuse at 5:14 PM on December 28, 2007
I applaud your big-hearted mother, and I agree with the many posters who suggest TNR and/or contacting a no-kill organization.
How you help her is offer to buy food and veterinary supplies (deworming, flea/tick control, etc.) and litter. She would, I'm sure, appreciate your support. And -- correct me if I'm wrong or truly naive -- but if she tends to and feeds these friendly strays, doesn't that mean their bellies are full of quality food and that they're less likely to be killing live critters to eat?
I understand your concern over her handling cats, then coming into the house -- but only if she's not hand-washing or using disinfectant before resuming domestic activities, i.e. cooking. You might be sure she's got bottles of disinfectant, peroxide, rubbing alcohol, etc. right inside the door and by the kitchen sink -- and get family members to ensure she uses them after her cat-bonding.
Good luck to all you humans/cats. Bah to the squirrels (nasty rodents!).
posted by Smalltown Girl at 10:51 PM on December 28, 2007
How you help her is offer to buy food and veterinary supplies (deworming, flea/tick control, etc.) and litter. She would, I'm sure, appreciate your support. And -- correct me if I'm wrong or truly naive -- but if she tends to and feeds these friendly strays, doesn't that mean their bellies are full of quality food and that they're less likely to be killing live critters to eat?
I understand your concern over her handling cats, then coming into the house -- but only if she's not hand-washing or using disinfectant before resuming domestic activities, i.e. cooking. You might be sure she's got bottles of disinfectant, peroxide, rubbing alcohol, etc. right inside the door and by the kitchen sink -- and get family members to ensure she uses them after her cat-bonding.
Good luck to all you humans/cats. Bah to the squirrels (nasty rodents!).
posted by Smalltown Girl at 10:51 PM on December 28, 2007
As unpleasant as it is, you may just want to call animal control. They will euthanize the cats, but supporting large colonies of invasive species is environmentally irresponsible.
posted by electroboy at 2:58 PM on December 29, 2007
posted by electroboy at 2:58 PM on December 29, 2007
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posted by hermitosis at 9:59 AM on December 28, 2007