Holiday in a nursing home

December 7, 2007 10:00 PM

My friends and I are going to take their children (under age 5) to a geriatric care facility to spread holiday cheer.

What can we buy in bulk, or make (easily) in bulk to distribute to old folks?

posted by kamikazegopher to human relations (14 comments total)

I've noticed that old folks don't really want much stuff. I mean, they've spent a lifetime accumulating crap, so they're pretty much finished with that.

Instead, old folks (say, the women) like flowers. But that could be expensive.

What you could do is make up 'trading cards' of your kids. Have four or five different photos so there's some variety. Print them out at Wal-Mart or the color printer at work, and hand them out. Perhaps you could also scan some art done by your kids and make up trading cards that way. Christmas cards?

Most old folks like kids, so this could be a good, inexpensive way to spread cheer.
posted by KokuRyu at 10:19 PM on December 7, 2007

Homemade Christmas cards that the children decorated before hand. Or some other kind of small decoration. I used to love using styrofoam balls to make ornaments. Decorate liberally with glitter or not as messy, use sequins and ribbons and pin them in place.
posted by lilacorlavender at 10:20 PM on December 7, 2007 [1 favorite]

I'll second KokuRyu that there really isn't anything you can buy in bulk they'd want (I'm sure anything would be appreciate but that's different and people in a facility like that are very appreciative of any effort). It's experiences in the time they have left that matter.

Perhaps instead of buying things hire a photographer and give them pictures of them with the kids? As an avid child lover (and I'm only 25) I'd like that. I'm sure when I'm 90 I'll love it even more.
posted by Octoparrot at 10:26 PM on December 7, 2007 [1 favorite]

I don't know what you should take, but I do know what you shouldn't. If one of those kids is sick, even if it's just the sniffles, it might be a good idea not to bring him. Little kids are germ factories and people with compromised immune systems should minimize their exposure. I don't know what the health status of the residents at this place is like, so I may be blowing this out of proportion.

While you'd probably never hear about it, your attempt at spreading cheer may ruin some family's holiday. I'm not saying kids + old people is always a bad idea, just asking that you please be aware of the likelihood that you're spreading something other than holiday spirit and act accordingly.
posted by polyhedron at 10:53 PM on December 7, 2007

Oh, come on. Most adults are carriers/vectors of whatever viruses the kids have, it's just that adults usually have the defenses to fight these bugs. My point being that any adult could pass on a bug to a resident at the care facility.

And I suppose I take great issue with calling children 'germ factories' when they most certainly are not.
posted by KokuRyu at 11:07 PM on December 7, 2007

Octoparrot has an excellent idea.
posted by Neiltupper at 11:43 PM on December 7, 2007

Polyhedron's right. Your idea will probably knock a few of these old geezers off.
posted by ikkyu2 at 11:49 PM on December 7, 2007 [2 favorites]

There's gotta be at least one Scroogey comment, doesn't there?

Anyhow, the picture idea is great, but depending on how old the kids are (and how many seniors at the center), you might consider a really easy bulk craft project. For example, a bag of pipe cleaners, some white glue and tissue paper equals some paper rosettes in about an hour or so. Make the "stems" green and the tops red and they're even seasonally colored. Hand one to each lady and maybe have the adults pin one like a boutonnière on each gentleman.

Just a start, but something simple like that. The kids get to actively participate in making these special things and handing them out. Many of the seniors would probably love that sort of thing.

When I was young, we'd make things like that and then sing for them.
posted by cmgonzalez at 12:09 AM on December 8, 2007

I used to take a group of kids to a retirement home for a school project, and had no plan or material goodies to offer the residents when we arrived. We just went and sat in the "common room" with them. Usually there is a room where you can go and introduce yourselves to everyone and spend some time talking and, more importantly, listening to the residents. The kids (and residents) had fun playing checkers and gabbing. Giving them a memento of the time together sounds like a good idea, but plan on your best gift being time spent with these often ignored people.

Before you go, you might want to prep the kids about what to expect and tell them that sometimes, they might have to initiate conversation, ask questions about their lives, etc... There is rarely such a thing as being too nosey in retirement homes because there are lifetimes of stories to share and usually nobody to listen.

Also, you might want to wait until after the holidays. It seems that retirement homes have most visitation activity during the holidays when church and school groups will turn a charitable eye to those in need. But what about January? Feb? March? The summer? There are very long breaks between holidays, and I'm sure the older folks would be ecstatic to know that they are on our minds and in our hearts throughout the whole year.
posted by boots77 at 12:37 AM on December 8, 2007 [2 favorites]

Before you go, you might want to prep the kids about what to expect

Seconding that you do a pre-game prep and also that you check out the facility beforehand. My mother and grandmother took me a geriatric care facility to cheer up the folks, and it shook my young self up pretty bad, because in that particular facility, the old folks were in BAD shape -- lots of obvious illness and dementia on display.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 1:04 AM on December 8, 2007

Why not get the kids to make a tiny christmas ornament with some blutack (don't know if you have it in your country.... the gumlike stuff that sticks to walls)? or take a candy cane. or tiny chocolate.

The best gift is the kids themselves. we take our baby twice a week to visit my grandmother in a nursing home and the grannies (almost no men in those places) just adore seeing her.

The occupational therapist takes around a bag of sweets every afternoon and the grannies all get some. even the diabetics. if they're old enough to be in a home, then sod the consequences. life's too short to not enjoy a bit of sugar every now and then.

Maybe do the sweets (candy i think you call it) or get the kids to bake some biscuits (cookies). or you could bake some. or just buy some nice ones and put them on nice trays.

Presentation is the key with biscuits.
and sweets.

Have fun. it's a joy to behold when littlies enter such places.

Don't forget to get the kids to wear christmas hats so the oldies know that it's a special visit too.

Yay for you.
posted by taff at 1:14 AM on December 8, 2007

You shouldn't take sick people with you, children or not.
posted by grouse at 3:33 AM on December 8, 2007

My girl scout troop used to do this. My mom is actually an RN who has worked in geriatric care most of her adult life, too. She would send home letters with the parents telling them not to let their daughters attend if they had even a slight cold.

And while it may sound offensive to some to say kids are germ factories, well, tough. There's a reason why my friends with kids in school or day care are sick way more often than I am. I get a cold and can't miss work I know enough to wash my hands frequently, wipe down my desk and work area with a disinfectant, avoid my coworkers so they don't get it, too. I've seen a friend's kid sneeze, wipe their nose with their hand which they then wiped on their pants, and take a bite of their brother's sandwich all in a 30 second span of time. THAT'S why kids are little germ factories. They just don't know enough yet to understand how to keep from getting their friend's cold or spreading their cold to all the people around them, and being a kid in general means you'll be in much closer contact with other people (on the bus, the playground, at naptime, whatever. kids have a lot more physical contact with each other than us adults.)

And for the elderly a slight cold can very easily turn into something far more serious, like pneumonia.


That being said, since I'm now a "scrooge," I'll also say we never brought gifts (although we did bring cookies- my mom would make two batches, one regular and one with a sugar-free sweetner for the diabetic residents). We'd usually make a craft with the residents, like decorating doilies with glitter to look like snowflakes. Something simple that's easy for both kids and older arthritic hands.
Oh, and it might be nice to teach the kids a song or two about hanukkah, too, unless you're going to a christian or catholic specific home. A lot of scout groups and classes do caroling around this time of year, and most don't bother with it. I remember a couple older ladies actually getting teary-eyed when we sang the dreidel song and another called hanukkah child, and I can still remember now them telling us how nice it was to hear it even though they knew none of us celebrated hanukkah (I went to a catholic school, the uniforms are always a dead giveaway). They also told us about the holiday, and what it was like for them growing up. And obviously, if I remember it almost 20 years later, it made an impression.[1]

Oh, and you may have better luck with an assisted care facility than an actual nursing home. In a home you're more likely to get a lot of dimentia, which can be disturbing for a kid. Assisted care is more like a senior dorm. Semi-independent living, with some nursing help and maybe a communal dining room and activities room. No matter what facility you call the person you want to speak to is almost universally known as the "activities director," that's the person who handles group events, brings entertainment in, does game days, whatever. They usually have a social work background. Talk to them, and be honest. If you think the kids are too little to understand alzheimers and not be afraid, let them know. They'll understand and won't be offended or anything.

[1]looking back, I'm amazed my devoutly Catholic mom both taught a bunch of Catholic schoolgirls songs of another faith, and managed to rope the school's music teacher, a nun, into helping her with it.
posted by Kellydamnit at 8:06 AM on December 8, 2007 [1 favorite]

Kellydamnit, what a wonderful suggestion, and kudos to your mom for being so thoughtful. It matters, it really does.
posted by canine epigram at 6:25 AM on December 12, 2007