Comments on: CBC Max Ferguson Show - Dave Dunston Air Traffic Controller Talk?

Question: CBC Max Ferguson Show - Dave Dunston Air Traffic Controller Talk?

DrJohnEvans — Tue, 11 May 2004 10:36:09 -0800

His name is Dave Dunston. Or possibly Dunson. Or possibly some other variant that sounds similar; I've never seen it written. He is, or perhaps was, a British air traffic controller. Many years ago he gave a talk on air traffic control, and commercial aircraft in general, to a group of British bankers. Somehow it got recorded, and was broadcast on Max Ferguson's show on the CBC. It is definitely one of the funniest things I have ever heard. I managed to tape it, but the old cassette technology is dying a speedy death. I want another copy, preferably on a more dependable medium. Has anybody heard of this guy? Does anybody know how, or if, this air traffic control talk recording was released? Somehow it got into Max Ferguson's paws; I want it in mine.

By: vito90

vito90 — Tue, 11 May 2004 11:09:29 -0800

Isn't it where he's mimicing customer demands for service? "We want it all, we want it now, we want it yesterday, and don't get used to it because tomorrow we'll want it all changed"?

By: Grangousier

Grangousier — Tue, 11 May 2004 11:09:49 -0800

You mean this chap? This CD

By: DrJohnEvans

DrJohnEvans — Tue, 11 May 2004 11:26:28 -0800

From the Amazon reviews: All I can suggest is to quote David Gunson, "find the seat which has the black box under it, because if that's all they intend recovering, you want to be strapped to it!"

YES. Yes, that's it. Thank you thank you thank you. Amazing. So many years of wondering... solved in forty minutes on Ask MetaFilter.

"Gunson", eh? No wonder Google and Amazon weren't producing anything good. I tried so many permutations of possibilities of his name, the words "air traffic control" and "british bankers"... argh! Curse you, Max Ferguson, for your low-pitched lack of anunciation!

By: stuartmm

stuartmm — Tue, 11 May 2004 11:27:07 -0800

vito90, i think you are thinking of a BIlly Connolly rant that was borrowed by BP and passed around a few years ago as a powerpoint presentation.

"We want this! And that! We demand a share in this, and most of that, some of this, and fuckin' all of that! Less of that, and more of this, and fuckin' plenty of this! And another thing – we want it now! We want it yesterday, and we want fuckin' more tomorrow! And the demands will all be changed then, so fuckin' stay awake!"
- Billy Connolly

From; http://www.gene.ch/info4action/1999/Sep/msg00078.html

> The Independent (London) September 23, 1999, Thursday
> SECTION: BUSINESS; Pg. 22 LENGTH: 754 words HEADLINE: CITY
> DIARY BYLINE: John Willcock BODY: A RECENT speech by Sir
> John Browne, chief executive of BP Amoco, to his senior
> managers titled "The Road to a Successful Merger of British
> Petroleum and Amoco", has become an unlikely hit on the
> Internet. When you punch in the web address for the speech,
> a key word from Sir John flashes up on screen - accompanied
> immediately by a voiceover by Billy Connolly, the Scottish
> comedian. Sir John has skilfully "sampled" a sketch using
> Mr Connolly's characterisitically salty language. First to
> flash up is "Performance". To which Mr Connolly's voice
> says: "I want more of this." Then "Return on Capital
> employed". To which he choruses: "More of that."
>
> And more of the same, until Sir John mentions "Net Cash
> Flow", to which Mr Connolly adds: "and f...ing all of
> that." So it goes on: "Personnel reductions"; "F...ing more
> of that."
>
> "Sense of Urgency". "We want it now. I want it f...ing more
> tomorrow." Finally the oil boss come to "Flexibility";
> "Then our demands will all be changed so f...ing stay
> awake."
>
> A bravely down-to-earth approach by Sir John. Just one
> thought. When I rang Billy Connolly's management company
> yesterday, asking whether BP had asked permission to use his
> voice, they said they hadn't heard about it and were looking
> into it. On the other hand, it wasn't BP who put Sir John's
> "Connolly-ised" speech on to the Net in the first place. A
> BP spokesman would not be drawn on the subject, except to
> murmur: "We're all great admirers of Billy Connolly."

p.s. Being Scottish working in America i was sent this thing almost as many hundred times as i was sent the RObin WIlliams spiel about golf.

that was a way longer post that i started to write. :-)

By: vito90

vito90 — Tue, 11 May 2004 13:10:10 -0800

yup, staurtmm, that is the sound clip I'm thinking of, thank you. And as long as were on the topic of sound clips, where can I find the one where the guy calls 911 from the Stop n' Go store because he's hit a deer and now he's trapped in a phone booth by a rabid dog that wants the deer? Saying he needs a "bambulance".

By: stuartmm

stuartmm — Tue, 11 May 2004 13:33:54 -0800

vito90,

http://www.snopes.com/critters/farce/deaddeer.htm

All about it plus an audio link ( realaudio unfortunately ) at the bottom.

By: vito90

vito90 — Tue, 11 May 2004 13:42:28 -0800

stuartmm, you're a champ, thank you.

By: Smart Dalek

Smart Dalek — Tue, 11 May 2004 17:03:56 -0800

Here's an MP3 version of one of the later "bambulance" calls.