Comments on: Ugly names for access points?

Question: Ugly names for access points?

fake — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 13:55:50 -0800

Help me name my WiFi AP in such a way that no one will want to connect to it.

I'm installing a WiFi access point in my apartment. It will be left unsecured -- so I'd like to name it something that is absolutely repulsive, perhaps even paranoia inducing... So far, the best I've been able to come up with is "CREDIT CARD STEALING AUTOMATON". Any ideas?

This is an exercise in fun, not network security; please save advice about leaving a network unsecured for other threads.

By: armage

armage — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 13:58:27 -0800

If you really want to keep people from connecting to it, use a whitespace character as the name, or perhaps a long alphanumeric string.

By: SteelyDuran

SteelyDuran — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 13:58:44 -0800

I use "ERROR WHILE FETCHING NETWORK NAME" and other fake errors. "ACCESS DENIED" is too tempting, so I hide behind an apparent malfunction.

By: armage

armage — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 13:58:58 -0800

...but that wouldn't be paranoia-inducing. In that case, perhaps something Lovecraftian?

By: niles

niles — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 13:59:06 -0800

VirusTest3

By: avoision

avoision — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:00:53 -0800

Reformat Drive

By: SteelyDuran

SteelyDuran — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:02:32 -0800

Are ESSIDs 8-bit clean? Use high characters that are hard to type. Or use control characters. Maybe even VT102 screen control codes to defeat unixy snoopers.

You could also use the name of ANOTHER neary WAP with a space on the end so they connect to the wrong one (or if the other one is secured, they try connecting and it fails).

The problem with all my ideas so far is that the ideas don't work if you can pick them off a list.

By: Servo5678

Servo5678 — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:02:46 -0800

"FBI SURVEILLANCE OPS" maybe? "9600 BPS LINE" is repulsive in its own way, too.

By: boo_radley

boo_radley — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:11:38 -0800

NAMBLA

By: SteelyDuran

SteelyDuran — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:12:27 -0800

"HONEY POT" (credit to my friend Stephen for that one)

By: Burhanistan

Burhanistan — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:15:38 -0800

Dirty_Crack_Ho_Drippin'

By: WinnipegDragon

WinnipegDragon — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:16:30 -0800

'TO CATCH A PREDATOR'

By: k8t

k8t — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:19:52 -0800

At an airport I once saw FREE GAY PORN as an SSID. Not sure if that would attract or detract.

By: brett

brett — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:21:40 -0800

I've seen "Buttsex" in the wild. On the other hand, I used that network, so I guess it wasn't too effective.

By: contraption

contraption — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:29:56 -0800

"KIDDIEPORN"

or maybe "hp", since that's what a recent unconfigured HP printer will annoyingly broadcast, and those are ubiquitous enough that most people will look right past them.

By: Help, I can't stop talking!

Help, I can't stop talking! — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:41:59 -0800

How about "Unavailable"? Maybe I'm dumb, but if I saw that in a list of network names, I'd skip it.

By: ALongDecember

ALongDecember — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:43:31 -0800

NETWORK WARNING

Disconnected Network

Linux Only Network

Unable to fetch network

I'M WATCHING WHAT YOU TYPE

Please alert administrator;912&F

or something random like that.

By: SteelyDuran

SteelyDuran — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:47:37 -0800

"Network Access Logger 2.9.3"

By: willnot

willnot — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:50:59 -0800

Most of these suggestions would make me more likely to try to attach them them for what it's worth.

Maybe something like Private Monitored Network - Please Don't Use. That's at least polite, and I might be more inclined to respect somebody's explicit wishes about something like that.

By: pierow

pierow — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:53:34 -0800

Someone in the suite next to ours at work had 'hellvirus.exe' - it was amazing to me how many IT professionals were convinced by this that their PCs had been infected with a virus. Sigh...

By: caution live frogs

caution live frogs — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 14:59:16 -0800

How about just hiding the broadcast ID rather than giving it a visible name? Nobody will see it (unless they're running NetStumbler or the like) so no one will connect to it. Shut off the SSID. Set your systems up to connect to this hidden network. Once they've found it once, they'll know to look for it in the future.

By: meech

meech — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 15:03:15 -0800

Maybe try headers from your spam. Some in my inbox at the moment:

SAVE $ ~ Buy Prescription Rx Medication Online DISCREETLY

Be the most confident man in town

Thanx for Purchasing Rolex, Tracking#GV93

By: theora55

theora55 — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 15:08:38 -0800

Goatse.cx
faxmodem
spamtrap
connecting . . . . . .
internal error: %40 %1%1
christ, what an asshole
ethereal logging 24/7
password = "tubgirl"

By: Chunder

Chunder — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 15:11:13 -0800

"Reverse-charge Wi-Fi Trial"

"Access point rebooting - please wait"

"Remote IP Harvester"

By: thilmony

thilmony — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 15:18:14 -0800

I used to use "Minneapolis Police Dept" but wondered if that would be too temptnig. Currently mine is "WEAK SIGNAL". I wonder if "New Java update available for download" would confuse people enough.

By: singingfish

singingfish — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 15:26:47 -0800

Mine is called "Wap will close if abused". No leechers yet, but the population density is pretty low.

By: quin

quin — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 15:43:13 -0800

Not exactly what you are looking for, but couldn't you just turn off the SSID? It would make you pretty much invisible.

But more on topic:

LOL w0nt hack
Free Credit Card Numbers
I use Ethereal (or more updated: I use Wireshark)
Viral Test Feed

I would avoid all of these.

By: edjusted

edjusted — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 15:46:08 -0800

Yeah, but meech wouldn't that attract the @#@#^% people that actually respond to spam? :P

By: kindall

kindall — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 15:46:17 -0800

I SEE YOU

By: porn in the woods

porn in the woods — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 15:59:48 -0800

Mine is called VIRUS DETECTED

used to be named NO FREE INTERNET FOR YOU,ASSHOLE

By: Zonker

Zonker — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 16:01:58 -0800

RIAACyberPatrol
CopyrightInfringementMonitor

By: Flashman

Flashman — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 16:16:49 -0800

I wouldn't find any of these too disuasive, if my laptop was telling me there's a strong, free signal, the exceptions being Willnot's 'Private Monitored Network - Please Don't Use', and perhaps thilmony's 'Police Department' (except realistically, why would the police department have a wireless hub in my apartment building?).

By: fire&wings

fire&wings — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 16:30:00 -0800

AOL

By: Nelson

Nelson — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 16:30:38 -0800

POLICE

or turn off SSID broadcast.

By: a robot made out of meat

a robot made out of meat — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 16:34:00 -0800

Definitely spoof DNS requests of non-you mac addresses so that all requests over http go to goatselike.

By: Blazecock Pileon

Blazecock Pileon — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 16:57:31 -0800

CARNIVORE TESTER v3.2c8

By: filmgeek

filmgeek — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 17:00:27 -0800

I keep thinking "anal warts"
v1agra
network offline
tmobile-have credit card handy
identity theft...connect here
my router is broken
stealing your passwords

By: drjimmy11

drjimmy11 — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 17:08:11 -0800

"pubes"

it's the word that ruins everything!

By: mendel

mendel — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 17:38:35 -0800

No SSID will be paranoia-inducing, because anyone who knows the little required to look at an SSID and react to it knows that truly paranoia-inducing SSIDs are things like "free wireless" or "smith family".

(And that networks that are secret and not honeypots just don't broadcast SSID in the first place.)

By: JZig

JZig — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 17:54:39 -0800

Unless you're just looking for cuteness, make it hidden. If you don't broadcast the SSID every normal device can connect to it, you just have to type it in manually. My Wii and DS both connect fine through my hidden-but-not-encrypted access point.

By: TomMelee

TomMelee — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 17:58:35 -0800

Name it something shifty, and then turn of SSID broadcast. Then, if they sniff it out, they might wish they hadn't.

By: limon

limon — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 21:39:18 -0800

I READ YOUR EMAILS

By: mmoncur

mmoncur — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 21:45:21 -0800

How about something like "Public WiFi $30 / hour"?

If I saw that I would assume it's going to require a credit card number to use, and the price is ridiculous.

FWIW, most of the answers above are too "inside baseball" to deter casual snoopers and freeloaders...

Also everyone who says just hide the SSID is right...

By: aberrant

aberrant — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 22:32:46 -0800

Just call it 2WIRE847 - that's what one of the major commercial wireless providers calls theirs (vary the last three digits).

By: spaceman_spiff

spaceman_spiff — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 22:53:11 -0800

abberant: So that's who keeps popping up on my list of available networks. Thanks.

By: sharkfu

sharkfu — Sat, 18 Aug 2007 00:17:03 -0800

A Robot Made of Meat--
How do you spoof DNS requests of non-you mac addresses so that all requests over http go to ____ ?

By: Kadin2048

Kadin2048 — Sat, 18 Aug 2007 00:27:11 -0800

"SSID Unavailable"

Although, I'd still try to connect to it. And pretty much every other suggestion so far.

You need to at least turn of SSID broadcast if you don't want to roll out the red carpet to others.

By: fake

fake — Sat, 18 Aug 2007 05:30:05 -0800

Thanks everyone - I think I'm going to go with "I READ YOUR EMAILS" for the moment, but the bizarre characters, Ethereal/wireshark references, and actually all your answers are really much appreciated. Thanks for all the great ideas.

By: aberrant

aberrant — Sat, 18 Aug 2007 08:19:51 -0800

Hey fake, if I came across an SSID like that, it'd certainly pique my interest and I might even try to join just to see what's on there. I think that might defeat your goal of staying under the radar....

By: niles

niles — Sat, 18 Aug 2007 14:56:49 -0800

sharkfu: Upside-Down-Ternet, among other methods

By: joeclark

joeclark — Sat, 18 Aug 2007 17:02:46 -0800

default.
linksys.
netgear.

By: nerdcore

nerdcore — Mon, 20 Aug 2007 21:36:51 -0800

Well, my friend's neighbors named theirs "poop touch" but that just made us giggle when we logged on, so I don't recommend it.

By: Four Flavors

Four Flavors — Tue, 21 Aug 2007 17:12:24 -0800

KEYSTROKE LOGGER