balls balls balls balls balls

August 16, 2007 9:06 AM

I'm throwing a Balls Ball. You know, just a buncha dudes, enjoying balls, watching 300 and drinking together. That kind of thing. We have a reasonable menu already, but still, I would like you to suggest your favorite balls. Give me your balls.

Right now, the menu is:

Hors D'Oeuvres:
Melon balls
Cheese balls

Main course:
Swedish Meatballs
Souzoukakia (Greek meatballs in tomato sauce)
Other possibilities?: Malai or Palak Kofta, Pan de Yucca

Dessert:
Bourbon Balls
Peanut Butter Balls

Drinks:
Highballs

So that ain't bad, but I'm sure that there are key balls I'm neglecting. What other balls could I serve, metafilter? Suggestions are nice, but recipes are nicer! Thanks in advance for your balls.

posted by Greg Nog to food & drink (48 answers total)

Matzo balls or dumplings?
posted by boo_radley at 9:07 AM on August 16, 2007

Schwetty balls? Chocolate Salty balls?
posted by Optamystic at 9:09 AM on August 16, 2007 [2 favorites]

if you're REAL men:

rocky mountain oysters
posted by HuronBob at 9:10 AM on August 16, 2007

Chinese chicken balls!
posted by Meagan at 9:10 AM on August 16, 2007

Brigadeiros
posted by sagwalla at 9:11 AM on August 16, 2007

To drink: Bawls.
posted by ALongDecember at 9:11 AM on August 16, 2007

See also segment "great balls of fryer"
posted by sagwalla at 9:13 AM on August 16, 2007

Snacks don't get much manlier than sausage balls
posted by TedW at 9:14 AM on August 16, 2007

Shouldn't you watch Spaceballs or Dodgeball or something? What does 300 have to do with balls? I guess the Spartans had a lot of balls...
posted by chudmonkey at 9:19 AM on August 16, 2007 [1 favorite]

Big couscous balls (israeli couscous)
Loukoumades (greek dough honey ball things)
Profiteroles for dessert
Falafel
Round Truffles

I think this is a fairly awesome menu idea and will probably steal it, FYI.
posted by ml98tu at 9:22 AM on August 16, 2007

Plus, a number of fruits are in ball form - peaches, applies, oranges, grapes, etc. Brussels sprouts are also balls.
posted by ml98tu at 9:29 AM on August 16, 2007

What a fun and sexy time for you!

Cherry balls
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 9:30 AM on August 16, 2007

Chinese sesame seed balls. Yum!
posted by jaimev at 9:32 AM on August 16, 2007

Real men's men eat Oliebols.
posted by and hosted from Uranus at 9:32 AM on August 16, 2007

Recipezaar has over 900 balls
Allrecipes has 300 more
posted by nuclear_soup at 9:52 AM on August 16, 2007

More dessert: Gulab Jamun
posted by reptile at 9:52 AM on August 16, 2007

Wow. Just wow. That is all, have fun!
posted by crabintheocean at 10:03 AM on August 16, 2007

Donut holes/Timbits?
posted by mjp at 10:13 AM on August 16, 2007

Atomic Fire Balls.

Try licking those balls!
posted by stefanie at 10:26 AM on August 16, 2007

Shouldn't you watch Spaceballs or Dodgeball or something?

chudmonkey, I initially had thought Spaceballs was the most appropriate choice, but after much thinking, I finally decided that 300 was a more balls-positive film.

Thank you for the suggestions and recipes, folks. Please keep 'em coming! Bonus points for recipes that people have made themselves, and can personaly vouch for. Also, to clear up a question from a now-deleted comment: this is not a gay or straight thing; all sexualities will be welcome in this grand celebration of balls!
posted by Greg Nog at 10:33 AM on August 16, 2007

Hostess Snoballs
popcorn balls
onigiri
umeboshi
ladoo
and of course, you'll want to serve drinks in coconuts.

What!? No Predator DVD? It's a staple of Guy Movie Nights everywhere.
posted by jamaro at 10:42 AM on August 16, 2007

Uncle Joe's Mint Balls are available mail order if you have enough time for advance planning.
posted by Abiezer at 10:43 AM on August 16, 2007

Bols

Beer balls
posted by Eater at 10:48 AM on August 16, 2007

Consider artichoke balls. And have fun! Here's hoping much hilarity (and ball appreciation) ensues.
posted by kryptondog at 10:50 AM on August 16, 2007

Malted Milk Balls
posted by Kangaroo at 10:57 AM on August 16, 2007

Scotch eggs
posted by spec80 at 11:07 AM on August 16, 2007

Falafel balls for any possible veggies? Or just because falafel is awesome?
posted by tr33hggr at 11:13 AM on August 16, 2007

Italian rice balls - aka arancini
Tartufo
posted by GrammarMoses at 11:16 AM on August 16, 2007

Peanut Butter Balls are delicious.
posted by andythebean at 11:43 AM on August 16, 2007

Dessert: Ice cream (What are scoops of ice cream other than balls?)
Afterward: gumballs.
posted by RikiTikiTavi at 12:14 PM on August 16, 2007

Nut Balls!
posted by peep at 1:42 PM on August 16, 2007

What you want as a main dish is a Tofurkey Roast. It's basically a sphere about 6" in diameter. look at the third item down on this page.

I would also suggest a spherical cookie know as "Swedish Wedding Cookies". They are just over 1" in diameter, full of pecan pieces, coated with a dusting of powdered sugar, and delicious. here's a recipe, and here's another.
posted by amtho at 2:02 PM on August 16, 2007

Also: matzo ball soup. Maybe not a summer dish, but so delicious and so full of balls.
posted by amtho at 2:03 PM on August 16, 2007

And maybe serve some (alcoholic?) boba.
posted by ORthey at 2:13 PM on August 16, 2007

Here you go.

And if you don't use any of those, this can hardly be said to be a balls ball. (How about a fries fry?)
posted by languagehat at 2:38 PM on August 16, 2007

I don't have a deep-fryer, so I've never tried to make them myself, but how about Hush Puppies?
posted by Rock Steady at 2:51 PM on August 16, 2007

Whatever you watch, do *not* forget to play AC/DC's "Big Balls" before, during and after your Balls Ball.
posted by Banky_Edwards at 2:57 PM on August 16, 2007

Sicilian arancini.

And add "Shall We Dance" to the movie queue.
posted by ardgedee at 4:27 PM on August 16, 2007

I would take a small melon baller to some raw potatoes.

Deep fry them like french fries. I've often made fries from scratch, and I often carve a few weird shapes to see which lucky eater gets them.

I've never made a hole batch of balls but it should work. Use the smaller scoop on a double ended baller. If the balls are too large they won't cook well.
posted by MonkeySaltedNuts at 4:36 PM on August 16, 2007

Rum balls
Popcorn balls
posted by loiseau at 5:03 PM on August 16, 2007

There is a Thai dish commonly known as "son-in-law's testicles". They are made of hard boiled eggs which are fried in a wok and then sliced in half.
posted by Kraftmatic Adjustable Cheese at 5:14 PM on August 16, 2007

and, as the father of one of the producers of 300, great choice in movies!!! :)
posted by HuronBob at 5:22 PM on August 16, 2007

Don't forget octopus balls (well, ok, dumplings), takoyaki!

If you actually make these for the party, you get mad props from me.
posted by zardoz at 6:05 PM on August 16, 2007

other great party food:
chowder/chili in sourdough balls
mochi ice cream

other movie picks: Kingpin, Great Balls of Fire!
posted by rob511 at 9:42 PM on August 16, 2007

Definitely arancini.
posted by robcorr at 9:42 PM on August 16, 2007

"Melon balls"? That's for chicks, man. I have to agree that in order to have a real ball's ball, you need to eat testicles. You think those Spartans at Thermopylae would shy away from eating a sheep's balls? No sir. They would chuck them in a deep fryer, serve with some green salad and vinaigrette, and feast upon those fine, fine cojones.

You will find that they taste pretty good. A bit like veal brains.

Melon balls, he said. Tsk.
posted by NekulturnY at 1:26 AM on August 17, 2007

Also locate the Dan Bern song Tiger Woods to go with the AC/DC.
posted by clavicle at 8:54 AM on August 17, 2007

If you have a good mac 'n cheese recipe, make it, then when it's cooled down, roll into balls, dredge with flour, shake excess off, dip into eggwash, then cover with panko breadcrumbs and deep fry for a minute or so. Fried mac 'n cheese was definitely the popular choice at my super bowl party last year.
posted by scottymacten at 9:05 AM on August 17, 2007 [2 favorites]