Pre-emptive round buying, or another way of celebrating the death of an asshole.

June 26, 2007 3:50 AM

I occasionally read about people buying rounds of drinks for a bar on the death of some hated public figure. I’m interested in doing something similar for a public figure in particular, but I may well be not flush with cash when it happens, so I'd like to do the legwork for it in advance.

I suspect the most practical thing would probably be to acquire a regular bar, build a relationship with the owner, and propose paying for the round in advance. But I move country too often to be sure of that approach :-/ . And it doesn't have to be a round at a bar; anything celebratory would do. Any suggestions for other ways to go about it?

posted by Aidan Kehoe to Human Relations (18 answers total)

Why not just put some money away weekly? Call it your death round fund. It's easier than trying to build relationships at bars when you're periodically moving.
posted by tomble at 3:56 AM on June 26, 2007

I know of people who have already arranged a party for when Maggie Thatcher throws a seven. If its winter it will be in someone's house, in summer a BBQ.

I have to say though, it's a lot of effort/thought to invest in negativity.
posted by ClanvidHorse at 3:58 AM on June 26, 2007 [1 favorite]

I remember being at a friend's house when the queen mum died, and he got a bottle of chamagne out of the fridge. Nothing against the queen mum in particular, just a general dislike of unelected sponging monarchy. If you have the sort of willpower that can keep champagne in the fridge long term this could be quite a cool option.

(ps: who?)
posted by handee at 4:08 AM on June 26, 2007

This whole notion is fun and interesting because it is spontaneous. This gesture also requires you to be flush with money, which is probably part of the attraction of being the buyer while everyone ooh and ahhs over how much alcohol you can afford to buy for strangers. Why don't you wait and see where you are when this public figure dies and act appropriately and within your budget in a spontaneous nature.
posted by fire&wings at 4:12 AM on June 26, 2007

Best answer: Open an online savings account. Use it only for this fund. Plop your money in now and don't withdraw it until he/she dies. Go to bar.

I have to agree with ClanvidHorse though. Why invest in negativity when you could be spending that money in a positive manner? Or, if you really must do something against this figure, do it in a positive manner, such as promoting something that this figure hates?
posted by happyturtle at 4:31 AM on June 26, 2007

I should buy a round tonight in honour of Blair's departure from office. Good idea.
posted by chuckdarwin at 4:37 AM on June 26, 2007

Just to add to the death fund idea, any money that remains in the fund after the round is bought could be donated to the official's opposing party.
posted by Pollomacho at 5:06 AM on June 26, 2007

Speaking as someone who has been known to buy the occasional round, being a well-liked (i.e. good tipper and nice guy) regular is good as you might get a break on the price (such as call brands at well brand prices); also, if you go when the bar is not too busy and populated with people who know you the tab will be less and the crowd will be more appreciative. This sort of thing is best done in neighborhood bars that are smaller and more intimate; it is not really even practical at a larger, crowded place.
posted by TedW at 5:19 AM on June 26, 2007

Assuming that you're not otherwise deep in debt, I would consider a "once in a lifetime celebration" to be an appropriate use of a credit card, paid off over time. At least, that's what I would do, if this were my sort of thing and I were broke when the event occurred.

[Let's admire the British ability to party: isn't it interesting that in the comments so far, the all the people mentioned for this kind of commemoration are from the UK (Thatcher, Queen Mum, Blair)?]
posted by blue mustard at 5:36 AM on June 26, 2007

Response by poster: tomble, I'd like to just do it and forget about it; I’d prefer not to think about the dude regularly any more than I have to.

ClanvidHorse, he’s not someone who will retire, so his death will immediately make the world a better place in a way I care about. That’s positivity, surely? :-) .

handee, I do have that sort of willpower, but that hits the moving-countries-too-often problem. And were I to say who it is, I'm pretty sure it'd start an impressive derail, so I won’t go there, hah.

fire&wings, well, for me the spontanaeity isn’t that big a part of it; I seem to be like the people handee and ClanvidHorse describes.

happyturtle, that seems the most practical way to go about it. Loses coolness points, but I don't have to tell anyone about carefully saving for the occasion when I’m buying drinks.

TedW, thanks for the tips! :-)
posted by Aidan Kehoe at 5:48 AM on June 26, 2007

[Let's admire the British ability to party: isn't it interesting that in the comments so far, the all the people mentioned for this kind of commemoration are from the UK (Thatcher, Queen Mum, Blair)?]

Well, that's where people buy rounds for the whole pub -- you don't see much of that in North America, say.
posted by mendel at 6:09 AM on June 26, 2007

[Let's admire the British ability to party: isn't it interesting that in the comments so far, the all the people mentioned for this kind of commemoration are from the UK (Thatcher, Queen Mum, Blair)?]

Just for the record, I'm not from the UK, but I plan on buying a round when Maggie finally kicks it, on general principle...
posted by pupdog at 6:10 AM on June 26, 2007

Several members of my family in Spain had bottles of Cava chilling in the fridge for a few years awaiting Franco's demise, so I think this kind of thing is more common than people think. I too will buy a round when Maggie buys the farm, like pupdog on general principle.
posted by ob at 6:22 AM on June 26, 2007

... he’s not someone who will retire...

Ah. I suggest that you investigate thoroughly your bar of choice, particularly the political and religious background of the proprietor(s). This may make a big difference regarding whether they'd actually allow your gesture, much less appreciate it.
posted by cog_nate at 7:33 AM on June 26, 2007

Seconding savings account. Although, I'd work with whatever bank you already have a relationship with, since a savings account at a bank you don't have other accounts with may have a high minimum balance. Plus, you might be able to set up some sort of automatic withdrawal from your checking -- say $5 or $10 a week (you'll have to guesstimate based on how long you think said public figure is going to last). Then you don't even have to think about it.

When you buy the round, put it on a charge chard, then transfer the money from the savings account back to your checking, and write the check for the credit card bill out of that.
posted by Kadin2048 at 7:34 AM on June 26, 2007

If you're in the States, you have a while to save up until Jan 20 2009 before you buy your round of drinks (573 days and counting actually).
posted by worker_bee at 7:37 AM on June 26, 2007

I don't think this will be as hilarious as you think it is. In your brain, it's an F. Scott Fitzgerald moment, but in reality, someone in the bar is sure to stand up and go "I'm a Catholic/Communist/Republican! Fuck you!"

Celebrations of someone's demise are probably better done at home, or with a small group of intimates.
posted by thehmsbeagle at 9:44 AM on June 26, 2007 [2 favorites]

Or, if you really must do something against this figure, do it in a positive manner, such as promoting something that this figure hates?

What's to say that promoting something this figure hates is positive?

Just saying.
posted by ASM at 5:34 PM on June 26, 2007