How can I help my 5-yr old daughter with her interest in charity?

June 5, 2007 12:04 PM

What are some ways a 5-year old can make the world a better place?

My 5-year old daughter has expressed a lot of interest in helping the less fortunate. She wants us to read books about helping other people, and asks a zillion questions about why people are poor, why they don't have enough food, and how we can help out. For example, she saw a picture of an emaciated Ethiopian child in a book about disasters, and grilled me for an hour about the situation.

Part of me wants to shield her a little from those realities. But it's also kind of amazing, and I'd like to encourage her. Maybe it'll rub off on me. :-)

Does anyone have any suggestions for ways both locally and globally that a 5-year old can volunteer her time (or her parents' money) to contribute to making the world a better place?

Just to narrow that down a little, she's most interested in relieving human suffering, feeding the poor, helping other children, etc.

posted by fcain to society & culture (23 comments total)

Plant a tree? It could be a good lesson in photosynthesis.
posted by k8t at 12:06 PM on June 5, 2007

Locally -- volunteering at the closest soup kitchen, or baking something for a food bank?

Globally -- neighbourhood fund-raising for a charity?
posted by hariya at 12:10 PM on June 5, 2007

If she receives an allowance (or even if she doesn't yet) encourage her save a certain amount of money each week to donate to a cause she's interested in. Use some time each week to talk with her about what she'd most like to accomplish with the money, then some time to search for organizations that would help this cause, then (ideally) some time visiting and volunteering at one or two of them to see if they feel right to her. By this time she'll have saved up some money, had some experience exploring what's important to her, and some time with hands-on helping. She may want to see if a few of her friends are interested in doing this alongside her.

Also, I like Plan and have supported that organization because it focuses on kids' health and education needs. You can also write to (and visit!) the kids and families you help if you're interested. This would broaden her ideas about who, exactly, she's helping.
posted by cocoagirl at 12:12 PM on June 5, 2007

Join or start a visitation program at your hospital's pediatric wing.
Hospitalized children are often bored and lonely. A friend can relieve their suffering. Bring games for the kids to play.

In this way you could get involved as well. Hospitalized adults need friends tool.
posted by Galen at 12:14 PM on June 5, 2007

Maybe she'd be interested in donating some of her old toys and clothes to a homeless shelter? And enlisting her friends to do the same? Good way to teach her about the value of both simplifying her life and community organizing.
posted by saladin at 12:17 PM on June 5, 2007

If at all possible, make sure that your child has an opportunity to make friends with children of varying economic status and of varying cultures. While that's not "charity", it will help give your child a solid foundation that people are people. Lots of kids, particularly in the 'burbs, don't get this opportunity.

When I was a kid I helped my mom deliver meals to a halfway house for recovering addicts. It was, honestly, kind of depressing to go there, but I think it was a good experience in hind sight. I'd suggest you look around locally and see what opportunities there are for delivering meals to those in need.

She sounds like a great kid for having this level of empathy at such an early age. Good on her.
posted by mcstayinskool at 12:18 PM on June 5, 2007

Sponsor a child in a similar age group? There are many reputable NGOs that provide community-based support to developing countries. Often times these groups will provide school supplies, vaccines, social workers, mosquito nets, latrines, etc. and will keep you updated on your sponsored child's family and community. Your money will not usually go to the family alone--funds are typically pooled from many sponsors to support the community as a whole. Your child might also enjoy sending drawings and letters to her counterpart and learning about the child's country and her interests. These programs typically cost about a dollar per day. If you're concerned about religious affiliations, groups like Plan Canada are non-religious and non-political.
posted by betafilter at 12:18 PM on June 5, 2007

Sponsor a child in another country through Actionaid or similar. Your child could send pictures back to the sponsor child as you'll get stuff through the post.

It sounds like you're looking for something to direct her attention onto which will be positive for her, but I would say to just be careful she doesn't start to feel she's responsible for solving world poverty. My five year old certainly lays some (to her) heavy responsibilities on herself and can get quite worried if she can't fix things.
posted by crocomancer at 12:21 PM on June 5, 2007

Kids (and adults too!) like projects that have some sort of visible, tangible results. Your profile location puts you in a smallish town and I'm not sure what kind of local poverty issues exist there, but several of my friends are rad activist parents who definitely engage their kids when they can. We have a lot of homeless people here and friends and I put together a weekly food not bombs serving for anyone who wants to eat. Stuff like that is easy because kids can definitely help around the kitchen, or help put up flyers or whatever. Obviously this might not be the perfect solution for you depending on your politics/interest in taking on a medium-large scale project. But other things you could do would be to start a vegetable garden and donate whatever you grow to a local food bank/soup kitchen.

Other things you could encourage her to do might be to raise money to donate to a local child abuse prevention agency or a larger more global cause. Have her help with the research on who to give money to and help her find creative ways to raise the money (lemonade, making beaded bracelets, yard sale, etc.)
posted by nerdcore at 12:21 PM on June 5, 2007

Good on you and your daughter!

I disagree on the save/donate suggestions- she's five, and I don't think she'll grasp the effect of donating as much as she will through something hands-on where she can see results.

I like the food bank/shelter idea, since it's something that you can do together, on an ongoing basis.
posted by mkultra at 12:29 PM on June 5, 2007

I'm going to go with planting a tree as well. I got a sapling from school for Earth Day when I was 7 or 8 and I planted it in my back yard with my dad. 20 years later, it's still there and it's really tall!

It's just neat to see it after all these years.
posted by spec80 at 12:32 PM on June 5, 2007

If at all possible, make sure that your child has an opportunity to make friends with children of varying economic status and of varying cultures.

I think this is one of the most important things, really. I'm from an upper-middle-class family and only have upper-middle-class friends. I "know better" and have always been interested in understanding, and helping to end, poverty, but so many of my peers/friends seem to think that it's just because people are too lazy to get a job, or that the poor are innately inferior and deserve to be poor. If you can teach her now that this isn't the case, that she's fortunate and that she should share and help out, you'll have done the world a huge favor.

Maybe you could start a jar in the kitchen where you and her deposit your spare change from trips to the store, etc., and periodically donate it to charity? I like saladin's idea of donating unwanted toys, too.

Planting trees and visiting those in hospitals are really nice, too, but it seems to me that her interest is in poverty.

As an aside, from my (far from expert) experience, kids often manifest their fears in their interests... I have no clue what your situation is, but make sure she doesn't fear that you're going to become homeless.
posted by fogster at 12:34 PM on June 5, 2007

Definitely make sure she's able to make friends with, or at least socialize with, children her age from different cultural and economic backgrounds. This may be easier said than done. But it's still important.

I also second the idea of having her donate some clothing/toys to a shelter. Not her favorite blanket she's had since birth of course, but some of the things she can bear to part with.

When you go birthday/winter holiday shopping, or ask for the related wish list, ask her to include a wish list of items that she'd like to give to 'underprivileged' kids.

And, I do think it's cool as hell to plant a tree. I did the same thing as spec80, and everytime I go home, I drive by the old house and marvel at how tall the tree has gotten.
posted by misanthropicsarah at 1:46 PM on June 5, 2007

My family did the "adopt a child in another country" thing, mentioned several times above, and it definitely provided my young sisters and I with loads of edutainment. We got lots of pictures and even handwritten letters, which we replied to, and we learned shocking things, like how little a day's worth of food costs in Africa, but further, just what scant resources, financial or otherwise, these people had.

Also, she could do lemonade stands and then adopt cows for people through heifer international.
posted by M.C. Lo-Carb! at 2:26 PM on June 5, 2007

My kids (5 & 4) really enjoy composting and recycling, which they understand to be important for the health of our planet. Same with walking rather than driving to various destinations.

They've enjoyed making food for friends who need help, and especially making cards for people as gifts.

I do talk to them a lot about social justice, but come to think of it, we haven't specifically DONE so much about it beyond emphasizing fairness in their daily interactions: I tend to encourage them to share everything, and if another kid at the park wants a toy they are playing with, they generally have to share it right away, which has helped them to be pretty generous and nurturing for their ages.

We've also gone to anti-war marches which has totally been fine and fun for them. I keep the explanation simple "Wars hurt and kill people. I'm marching because I want everyone to know that this war should end!" and don't stay super long, and they tend to get it on a basic (and instinctive level) and enjoy it overall.
posted by serazin at 2:30 PM on June 5, 2007

Community gardens! Do you have any programs in your area where vacant lots are turned into community gardens, or where extra crops from community gardens are donated to food banks?

Understanding where food comes from and how it grows can lead to learning how nutrition works, which can lead to learning about the cycle of hunger and poverty.
posted by desuetude at 2:35 PM on June 5, 2007

do meals on wheels together. it will be a great chance to bond, and the older folk will really love your daughter.

(i don't know what a 5-year-old's attention span is like. would she make it through a meal service at a homeless shelter? i'm not sure.)
posted by thinkingwoman at 3:23 PM on June 5, 2007 [1 favorite]

Get certified to provide respite foster-home care to children in her age group. Respite care allows foster parents to have a weekend without the kids or go on vacation or something. It is temporary. Although once the agencies know where you live, they will try to get you to be a more full-time foster parent.

When I was 6-7 my parents happened to be friends with a foster family that fostered 4-5 kids at a time. I would have play dates with them. It changed my life, and I still keep in loose contact with one of the kids I played with.

A less in-your-face activity was that each christmas we would make gift baskets for nursing home residents and kids in a local group home. I would draw pictures for the older folks and pick out and donate some of my own toys for the kids in the group home.
posted by Mozzie at 4:11 PM on June 5, 2007

misanthropicsarah writes "When you go birthday/winter holiday shopping, or ask for the related wish list, ask her to include a wish list of items that she'd like to give to 'underprivileged' kids. "

My local mall used to have an "Angel Tree" where you could pick an angel off the tree and buy a gift for the child listed. It usually included their age, clothing sizes, and a fun wish-list type item. The kid were usually living at local orphanages.

If you don't have access to something like that, perhaps you could set one up. They have one in my office building every Christmas that our building manager coordinates. Your daughter could help collect and deliver the gifts. And what's more fun than playing Santa!
posted by chiababe at 4:13 PM on June 5, 2007

I rescued a silver maple sapling from the cracks in a sidwalk when I was five. 21 years later it's a huge tree. (actually my mom just sold the house I grew up in this morning...so now the house is someone else's...but the tree in front will always be mine!) I think this would be good for a kid. They get to learn science, and it's something very permanent and tangible. (which might be better for a kid, say, than raising some cash for a charity that does global work, where they don't actually get to see and touch the outcome of their good deeds.)
posted by Green Eyed Monster at 4:21 PM on June 5, 2007

i worked with an organization that paired kids with an adult mentor for a school year. the kids picked a cause that they cared about- say "poor people", or "abandoned pets". they researched for a professional organization that helped this group, and contacted the organization to see how they could help-- ie, collect blankets & dogfood for the animal shelter, or raise money for the homeless shelter by doing something they liked, say holding a bake sale or whatever.

in this organization, the kid and mentor meet every 2 months at group activity days to plan the kid's course of action, including due dates (ie, on dec 10, i will ask my prinicipal if i can hold a bake sale at school, and ask my sister to help me make 10 posters adertising the sale. we will put up the posters on dec 13, etc etc).

the kid created a 30sec pitch of their idea, ie, "because i care about homeless pets, i will make daily announcements at school to encourage my schoolmates to donate blankets and pet food, then i will donate it to the humane society on may 10. principal, would you help me by allowing me to advertise with posters and announcements?"

kid and mentor spoke on the phone weekly to keep the plan on track. lots of brainstorming along the lines of "what are all the steps i will take? who would be happy to help me? how can i ask that person for help? what if they say no?" in the end, the kid conducts every single transaction herself, which is pretty amazing to see.

here are actual sample goals that kids did in the program:

“fun stuff for kids:”
ajana’s goal was to collect 100 toys, games and books to donate to the children's aid society. she organized a donation drive at school, collecting 1470 items, way beyond her goal!! ajana was so proud to take 3 carloads of toys to the shelter for kids in foster care.

“homeless pets need our help!”
annie wanted to help the abandoned pets at the shelter. she and her coach toured the facility, then planned and ran a donation drive and a big white elephant sale to raise money. she gave the money to the animal shelter, and donated the unsold clothes and books from the sale to a shelter. she raised $200 for the pets, and donated 7 boxes of useful items to the shelter.

so maybe you and your daughter can do something similar?
guide her in picking an organization, calling them herself, asking how she can help, and then implement a project that takes say 6-8 weeks to put together, with an attainable weekly goal and a progress chart stuck on the fridge.

week 1- pick a cause, call the organization, ask for guidance, make a plan

week 2- assess your community- who can help? classmates, family, neighbours? how to ask them?
spread the word: make flyers to send home with classmates, posters for school & street, etc

week 3- make phonecalls / write emails to get organizations on board-
would a local paper cover this? could a store help donate?

week 4- make sure all nitty-gritty is taken care of- need supplies? donation boxes? more signage? price tags? plan every detail for the big day

week 5- implement "big day", and take photos!

week 6- give proceeds to cause

week 7- send thank you notes

etc.
good luck!
posted by twistofrhyme at 6:02 PM on June 5, 2007

Read Miss Rumphius and clean up a local park and plant flowers?
posted by nonane at 7:32 PM on June 5, 2007

I really like the idea of having your child help out at the food bank/homeless shelter/soup kitchen/whatever. When I was young, my family and I had to go to the food bank every other week to get food, and I still remember seeing and talking to kids there my age helping out, and it made me feel like I was going to a friendly place.

Around Christmas (if that's your thing) there are lots of organizations that sponsor programs that are all about buying gifts for disadvantaged kids. Some are affliated with various religious organizations, but plenty aren't. The one my college works with buys gifts for kids in half-way homes. You can take your daughter shopping and let her pick out the gifts. Many of these programs also include a component that invovle going with volunteers to deliver the gifts and spend some time with the recipients face-to-face.

Another idea, if you are ready for a big commitment yourself, is to possibly get invovled with Big Brothers/Big Sisters in your area. This option would allow you to do some good, too. If you were willing to take on the responsibility (it is a big one, but also hugely rewarding) it would be a good example for your daughter, not to mention the fact that it would give her an opportunity to interact with the child you act as a Big Brother/Sister to.

There are always opportunites if you look for them. See what issues she is most interested in, and take her to the library to get some books and continue to develop her interest in and knowledge of the subject. Good job and good luck!
posted by nuclear_soup at 7:06 AM on June 6, 2007