Help me keep my head from looking like a bowling ball.

May 14, 2007 6:30 PM

How can I style my hair to avoid getting overheated without making my head look tiny?

I have longish hair (just past shoulder-length). My favourite way to style it is to take about a half inch chunk of hair from just above the ears, pull it back and clip, so my hair is kept out of my face but is otherwise left loose. But, I'm no longer living in the South where everything is air-conditioned, so now I have to figure out a way to keep my hair off my neck, or I end up sweltering.

If I just twist it back or stick it in a ponytail or a single braid, it looks alright, but I think it makes my head look too small, or out of proportion, or something. I think I look better with some stuff going on around my neck. And when my hair is bound back, it's smaller around the sides and top as well.

I don't like to spend a lot of time on styling - anything that involves a curling iron or a hairdryer is right out. I only really started to figure out how to look okay when I was an adult, and I tend to find something that I'm happy with and stick with it. So I am totally lost. Hope me.

posted by joannemerriam to clothing, beauty, & fashion (17 comments total)

I do the loose-bun thing. Pull your hair back on a ponytail, but instead of pulling the ponytail all the way through the elastic on the final twist, pull it to form a small loop and twist your hair so the loop points downwards and the ends of your hair are pointing upwards. It takes a few tries to find the tightness/length you want, but afterwards you can play with the end of the hair to have some of it visible from the front, and if you do it loose enough, you'll usually have strands/wisps falling naturally around your face within about 10-20 minutes. The whole thing should take about a minute to finish.

My hair is the same length as yours, and I look like a guy when it's pulled back in a ponytail. The loose-bun thing is the only compromise I've found that works well, so far, although past a certain length it gets to be more trouble than it's worth.
posted by Phire at 6:46 PM on May 14, 2007

Have you considered a shorter haircut? You don't mention what texture hair you have, but if it's the least bit wavy or curly, a shorter haircut might keep it off the back of your neck and give you some more body that will keep it from seeming flat and tiny-headed. Alternatively, you could combine shorter hair with a mild perm. They have new techniques that are nothing like the terrible spiral perms of the 80s and can give you just enough bounce and body to give your hair shape if it's naturally flat. The point is that a good haircut, rather than a new way of pulling your hair back, might be the right answer in this case.
posted by decathecting at 7:22 PM on May 14, 2007

headband? Maybe a slightly puffy fabric circle to hold your hair back?
posted by amtho at 7:38 PM on May 14, 2007

My hair isn't the least bit wavy. Straight as a board, and not thick - hairdressers always comment on how fine it is. I have considered getting a perm - advice about what sort of place to go to and what to ask for and what's reasonable to pay would all be appreciated.
posted by joannemerriam at 7:43 PM on May 14, 2007

pull it to form a small loop and twist your hair so the loop points downwards and the ends of your hair are pointing upwards.

I do this the other way round, loop on top and ends hanging down. Either works, I just do it this way so it doesn't stick above the top of my head. That looks kinda funny from the front.

Any variation on the messy bun will work, you can have more or less hair sticking out or a smoother or looser pull back from the front (i.e. slick it all down or just tie it back loosely), as required. Try using a claw clip or french roll or similar to hold all your hair up loosely rather than tie it slicked down with an elastic thingy, you can get nice whispy bits falling around your face without heavy hair on your neck.

The other thing I do when it's humid is tie it up as you described (top part clipped) then twirl the free hanging stuff into a loose loop and tie with elastic part way along. Kind of like shortening a rope by putting a loose knot in it. There is still hair hanging down below my ears (above the loop) and the end flops over too to hang down, but it shortens the hanging hair enough to stop it sticking to my neck.

I actually do have a freakishly small head with longish hair, as well as a job where I can't have hair hanging in my face getting in the way. I wear a slicked back full ponytail or tight bun a lot of the time without it looking too weird. At least I hope that's the case and I'm not really a pinhead but no one told me *grin*. I think it works because I have a fairly solid fringe (bangs) which adds bulk and interest at the front. I keep mine short and smooth but longer, wispier fringes falling to one side or something can also break up the outline of your head and reduce the weird small head look.

Apparently the loosely tied up messy look is in this year, so it's a win all round.
posted by shelleycat at 7:53 PM on May 14, 2007

Snood?
posted by hortense at 8:21 PM on May 14, 2007

Oh, shelleycat - My hair is long enough that the bits sticking up actually fall back down in two sections around the main bun. It's actually a pretty cool effect.

(o) <-- essentially, from the back, haha.
posted by Phire at 8:25 PM on May 14, 2007

Oo, I like the sound of that actually. I'd just need to pull more through and spread it out more so it will split. Am gonna try it.

Mine fans out across the bottom so the bump kind of sits over it's own little nest of hair. The bits hanging out aren't very long, probably stop just below my natural hairline at the bottom. But then my hair is curly so I can get more scrunched into the bun without increasing bulk too much. You can make the bun smaller and higher and still have hair hanging down without it actually being on your neck.
posted by shelleycat at 8:58 PM on May 14, 2007

I look like a bastardization of Mulan as Li in Disney's Mulan, and a traditional depiction of a Chinese child at Lunar New Year, if I have a high bun/loop with the hair coming down. *grins* My hair's stiff, unfortunately, so having had it in a ponytail for the past week or so, it refuses to go back into the bun without making me look like Pipi Longstocking. Ah well, I'll switch it around when I shower in the morning.
posted by Phire at 10:36 PM on May 14, 2007

Pigtails are perfect on hair that length, and are unexpected and extra-cute on women over the age of 10. They give that hair-pulled-back comfort while still showing that you have hair. Extra points for braided pigtails.
posted by loiseau at 11:08 PM on May 14, 2007

Oh -- and you don't mention, but bangs and some layers around the face soften the severity of a ponytail. Long bangs pushed off to one side are still cool in summer.
posted by loiseau at 11:10 PM on May 14, 2007

I've tried pigtails. They're an adorable weekend look, but don't help me get taken seriously at work (I already look younger than my age, so this is an issue for me). Still, that's a couple of days of comfort...

I'm very hesitant to commit to bangs since they take so long to grow out and look so awkward while doing so. I had bangs as a child and they make me look cherubic, so I'm not sure they'd actually help.

I am wearing the messy bun suggested above right now, and it softens the severity of pulling my hair back quite a bit, but I guess my hair isn't long enough to hang down the sides to be visible from the front. Nice. Any more ideas like this?
posted by joannemerriam at 3:22 AM on May 15, 2007

I do something similar to the ones you've favorited, but instead of having the loose bun in the middle of my head, I pull it through the lower right side (a little below my ear). If I have my hair all behind me, my face looks like a watermelon. I think the visible loose side bun gives offsets the symmetry.
posted by like_neon at 5:22 AM on May 15, 2007

I have the same issue; my hair is straight and thin and I don't like to have bangs, so if I pull it back and don't have any hair showing from the front I think it looks unflattering. What I do is twist my hair up from the nape and pin it in place with a long, curved, metal bar clip. My hair fans out a little from the sides and top of the clip and it lessens the severity of pulling it back while still looking neat and grown-up. I can twist it tight or loose depending, of course twisted loosely makes it look fuller while still keeping it up.

I find I prefer to pull all my hair back with the same long bar clip instead of using a ponytail elastic (the barrette is over 3 in. long). That way it's still off my neck without the tightly-drawn-back look, and the ends fan out instead of hanging in a tail so they are visible from the front. This works whether I clip it at the nape or clip it higher up towards the crown. If it grows out long enough I can even double it under or over before clipping which gives a sort of loose messy bun effect.

Another way to add some texture to thin straight hair is to braid it around the face or French braid it. You could either braid little braids from the temples before pulling it back, French braid along the sides over the ears before pulling it back, or just French braid it all, giving it some looseness, and then tucking the tail up under the French braid and bobby-pinning or clipping it in place. This gives height to the crown of your head and some fullness on the sides without loose ends. It takes practice to do a French braid but once you've got it down (and it's easier to do with thin hair) it'll only take a couple minutes; you can be lazy and only do the top part and bun or clip the rest if you like. Here is a link to a photo guide on French braiding that I Googled for a previous AskMeFi braiding question.
posted by Melinika at 6:52 AM on May 15, 2007

How about some add-on hair on an elastic, that you wrap around your own pony or bun? Something like these? I wear 'em all the time, and no one's the wiser.

I do recommend this brand, too. Huge differences in quality in the fake hair arena, it's true
posted by houseofdanie at 8:03 AM on May 15, 2007

@ like_neon:
every girl at the camp I worked at last summer (campers and counselors, ages 11-30's) freaking loved that look. I took to calling it wearing one's hair at 'half mast.' I had completely forgotten about that, so thanks for a little kick of nostalgia.

@ the OP:
I'm a male with shaggy, curly, and thick hair, so I have no personal experience in the matter, but a friend of mine has your exact same hair length and type, and happens to be at my house right now. so here's what she says:
First of all, if you don't already, get a bunch of layers cut into your hair. It'll make it look alot less flat in pretty much every style.
Second, an alternative to the loose bun (which totally works) is a scarf-style headband, or even an elasticized cloth one (not a terrycloth workout headband. think the same material a stretchy t-shirt is made out of.) All you have to do is situate the scarf on your head, and then tie it a little tight at the nape of your neck, and voila. Hair's still functionally down, but now pulled just slightly off your neck. Same with the cloth tube one, but you're just pulling it on.
posted by The Esteemed Doctor Bunsen Honeydew at 8:49 AM on May 15, 2007

Thanks, everybody.
posted by joannemerriam at 3:26 AM on May 16, 2007