How can I transport alcohol from Missouri to Florida?

May 6, 2007 2:49 PM

I need to get three bottles of liquor to Tampa by Friday, which is when I arrive there. Can I ship it via UPS or FedEx, or should I risk bringing them in my luggage?

I'm arriving in Tampa late Friday night, and leaving on a cruise early Saturday morning. I'm determined to smuggle some booze on the cruise with the help of a couple well-hidden Rum Runner flasks, but I won't have the time, nor transportation to buy the liquor when I get to Tampa.

I've heard you can ship alcohol via UPS, which I think would be the easiest way to do it. I haven't flown for nearly three years, so I'm not sure how hard airlines are cracking down on the "no liquid" stipulation, which is why I'm hesitant to store it in my checked luggage.

So, how can this cheapskate get alcohol over state lines?

posted by bjork24 to food & drink (26 comments total)

I don't know about shipping, but if you're flying you will probably be able to buy alcohol in the airport after you arrive. Might be simpler. (Expense may be an issue here, but time/transportation probably isn't)
posted by LobsterMitten at 2:59 PM on May 6, 2007

The liquid prohibition only applies to carry-ons. There's no rule against checking liquor in your baggage.

From Continental Airlines (used as an example because it's the first Google hit for 'liquor checked luggage':

Alcoholic beverages in retail packaging may be checked as baggage. A customer will be permitted to check up to 5 liters (1.3 gallons). The alcoholic beverages should be packed to prevent breakage. Continental shall not be liable for breakage or spillage of alcoholic beverages.

Alcoholic beverages purchased before reaching the security checkpoint may be carried on board in a 3 oz. or smaller container and in your quart-size, zip-top plastic bag.
posted by mudpuppie at 2:59 PM on May 6, 2007

See also.
posted by mudpuppie at 3:02 PM on May 6, 2007

Yeah, checking it in bags is definitely the way to go here. Especially if you're going to be using (plastic? metal?) flasks, you shouldn't even really run a risk of them breaking.

I would not try to carry on liquids; they are still extremely pissy about it. If you could somehow get into the post-security duty free at your origin airport (or if you could persuade an international traveler to run in for you...), then possibly you could carry it on, but getting more than 100 mL of liquid through security is not going to happen.
posted by rkent at 3:03 PM on May 6, 2007

Please forgive my asking, and if it is off-topic please delete, but what kind of cruise are you taking?
Aren't these ships loaded with every kind of booze imaginable?
posted by Dizzy at 3:48 PM on May 6, 2007

Yep, checked bags do not have a liquid restriction.
posted by The Deej at 3:52 PM on May 6, 2007

Yes they are, but very few cruises include alcohol in the purchase price.

Beware that cruise lines tend to take a very dim view of people smuggling alcohol on board, and if they do catch you, it is (remotely) possible that they will deny you boarding. At the very least they will absolutely confiscate your booze.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 3:54 PM on May 6, 2007

Anecdotally:

IANAL, so I don't know what the legality of mailing booze is, but I once sent a couple of bottles of bourbon to a couple of people, and when I brought the first one into one of those "Mailboxes, etc" or what-have-you, the fellow said I couldn't ship alcohol, but if I brought in a box that was already sealed, I could ship that (wink, wink).
posted by Nabubrush at 4:02 PM on May 6, 2007

We wanted to ship some aquavit from Seattle to TX and when we inquired, we were told it was a felony. It could be BS. We decided not to ship it though.
posted by Good Brain at 4:21 PM on May 6, 2007

but if I brought in a box that was already sealed, I could ship that (wink, wink)

Happened to me, too.

"I want to ship this bottle of expensive gin."
"We can't ship alcohol."
"OK. Can I buy a box, packing peanuts and tape?"
"Yes. Here you go."
"Thanks."

five minutes later

"Hi, I'd like to ship this box."
"What's in it?"
"A giant bottle of perfume, so don't break it!"
"Got it."
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 4:22 PM on May 6, 2007 [2 favorites]

It's a Carnival cruise, so that means there will be lots and lots of free food, and lots and lots of drinks for $15 or more. Don't get me wrong, I still plan on buying a couple drinks, but I want to make sure I'm pretty well liquored up before I shell out $15 for a white Russian.
posted by bjork24 at 4:46 PM on May 6, 2007

Good plan. Just don't leave the bottles sitting around in your cabin.
posted by Flashman at 5:00 PM on May 6, 2007

Just so you know, it's almost impossible to ship liquor. I went through this recently. I got the run-around from bored state officials, who may or may not be telling the truth.

Basically, states have reciprocity laws with other states, so first you have to check that, purely for legality. Missouri signed, but Florida hasn't. Then, the shipping organizations themselves want an adult present for the signing of the package, so someone has to pick it up. Finally, many of them don't want to do it unless you have a particular kind of liquor license.

It's easier if you can get the liquor simply shipped to you by a seller. Trust me. Or just, you know, avoid telling them the truth about what you're shipping.
posted by adipocere at 5:55 PM on May 6, 2007

When my wife and I have done cruises in the past, you simply give them your baggage on arrival and they bring it to your room later. Seems to me that it's highly unlikely they have time to search all that luugae before bringing it on board. I'd skip the flasks and just conceal the bottles well in the luggage. And ditto the "don't leave it out in the room". There will be more crew members in and out of your cabin than you think.
posted by cosmicbandito at 6:02 PM on May 6, 2007

man, just bubble wrap those things and put them in peanuts and pack them up in three separate boxes, ship priority (2 days average) and it shouldn't run you much

or just put in carry on, shouldn't be a problem
posted by Salvatorparadise at 6:50 PM on May 6, 2007

I vote for bringing the booze in your luggage.

I know that sending perfume through the US mail is kind of a pain in the ass...it has to be sent via surface mail, which takes longer. I'm not sure, but I suspect alcohol might be similar. I also know how packages get kicked around by USPS, FEDex & UPS during shipment.
posted by pluckysparrow at 8:44 PM on May 6, 2007

in response to the first comment: Tampa International doesn't have duty free shops in all of its terminals (there's only one that i can think of, though there may be more), and the airport is laid out in such a way that, to get from one concourse to another, you would have to pass out and back in through security, which of course you can't do if you don't have a flight to catch ("i need to get to terminal C so i can buy booze to smuggle onto a cruise ship" probably won't get you access). and we have (or at least have had in the past) particularly weird regulations about interstate alcohol shipment.

additionally, i worked at a campus post office for three years, and packages sent through us tended to be returned by the branch office if they made funny noises. like, say sloshing.

so i'd agree with "pack it in your checked bags," cause you're certainly not going be able to keep it in your carryon.
posted by wreckingball at 9:24 PM on May 6, 2007

Bringing booze to the cruise pier is not the problem. As other people have pointed out, you can just put it in your checked luggage, no problemo -- just wrap it in clothing so that it doesn't get broken (and maybe some plastic bags in case it does crack) and you'll be fine. The TSA doesn't give a damn about liquor in your checked bags, just carryons.

Where you're likely to run into a problem is getting it onto the boat. If this is your first cruise, then you may be unfamiliar with the drill. They X-ray all your baggage when they bring it onto the ship. Ostensibly it's to stop people from bringing guns and bombs on, but really it's all about the liquor. They'll helpfully offer to "hold" any shore-bought booze until the last day of your trip, when they'll deliver it to your room.

It's possible if the bottles are in your big bags -- the ones you give to the porters in the terminal and which get left in your stateroom later that day -- and not in your hand luggage, they might not remove them (some of the ships have the initial luggage scanning done by outside contractors who don't seem to care quite as much), but it's a bit of a chance. But every major cruise line looks for bottles of alcohol in carryon baggage as it goes through the X-ray machine as you board the ship. Trust me on this one.

It leads to some pretty ridiculous scenes on shore, particularly at the ports where liquor is very cheap (e.g. St Thomas). I've seen lots of people pouring liquor into various containers (water bottles, soda, juice, etc.) in order to get it back onto the ship. Nothing funnier than a bunch of 60-and-over folks smuggling booze onto a boat like it's their highschool prom.

Feel free to give it a shot -- they won't throw you off the boat for trying, as long as you just don't argue with them and claim total ignorance (and act deeply apologetic for the damage you might have caused to their enormous alcohol profit margins), if you get caught. Act harmless and clueless, and if you can pull it off, senile. They'll probably just remind you of the rules and tell you you'll get the bottles back on the last day along with the rest of the non-overpriced liquor.
posted by Kadin2048 at 11:50 PM on May 6, 2007 [1 favorite]

And wreckingball is right-- USPS doesn't allow alcohol.
posted by faceonmars at 12:34 AM on May 7, 2007

And FYI - the reason for the restrictions is that booze is regulated and heavily taxed by state authorities, and for that reason is a favorite item for smuggling across state borders. And what you propose to do may well be smuggling. Each state has a de minimis exception, but UPS etc. cannot be expected to keep track of all of the laws and regulations. So the easiest answer for them is to prohibit it.
posted by yclipse at 5:04 AM on May 7, 2007

You could buy 500 pairs of flask sandals.
posted by wearyaswater at 5:54 AM on May 7, 2007

If the liquor is clear, it could conceivably pass for water in a water bottle (Aquafina, etc.), which you could have in your carry on.
posted by kableh at 8:43 AM on May 7, 2007

Airport security is a JOKE. I've gone through it three times with 3 quarts of water in my carry-on bags. My wife has neck problems and has a special pillow that fills with water. We always bring it with us in carry-on. When they enacted the "no liquids" rule we forgot that the pillow had water and brought it anyway. The bag went through the X-ray and nobody said anything. On subsequent trips I've done the same, and it's never caused a problem.

But God forbid that I bring on my nail clippers! I might clip someone to death!
posted by flyingcowofdoom at 12:36 PM on May 7, 2007

These are all great tips. I learned from reading the CruiseCritic forums that Rum Runner flasks, which are light-weight, puncture-proof plastic bladders, are nearly undetectable by x-ray. That's what I'm using, so the booze won't even be in a bottle. If they do happen to find the liquor-filled, puncture-proof bladders tucked away into the large pockets of my cargo shorts, I'll just say that I did that to conceal it from the airport security. Then I'll pass the guy or girl a $50 bill and keep walking.
posted by bjork24 at 3:27 PM on May 7, 2007

How about a plastic reservoir from a hydration system? Camelbak and Platypus both make hydration systems that you wear on your back with a tube to your mouth. You can fill the reservoire with "water" at home and pack it in your checked luggage. You don't have to worry about glass breakage.

The day you board the boat, wear the system on your back and clip the tube on for easy access. Make it look like you are really serious about staying hydrated. Since they will be trying so hard to find hidden liquor, the best hiding spot might be right in front of their faces.

If you want to add an additional level of theatrics, you could even hide a few single-serving bottles in your luggage so that you get "caught" by the cruise staff.
posted by colgate at 7:38 PM on May 7, 2007

I can't speak to the airline or shipping stuff, but I took a cruise this past feb on Carnival leaving out of Long Beach. I am a devout cheapskate and I like a drink, so I did a similar reading and re-reading of the Cruise Critic forums. What I took away from it was there was a pretty good chance it'd get through, and if it didn't, they'd just give it back to you at the end of the trip -- so really, no harm in trying. They *do* have clauses which allow them to refuse you entry if you're trying to smuggle liquor onboard, but I suspect they reserve that for the drunk douchebags who are making a scene. I was, naturally, a little worried -- I didn't want to ruin our trip just to save a little money, but it seemed like odds were really really low of that happening.

In the end, I decided not to bother buying anything to conceal the liquor in for two reasons: 1: that would cut into the amount of money I was saving and 2: I figured if they found it they'd be a little more upset that I purposely tried to conceal it. I ended up buying some booze in LA, and just tossing it in our checked luggage (glass bottle of vodka, wrapped in a couple shirts and a prayer) along with the bottles of wine we were bringing. They explicitly permit you to bring on a 'reasonable quantity' of wine, so I we took 5 bottles for a three day trip, and I figured if they snatched up my liquor I'd get drunk on shore, or get crafty with smuggling stuff through the X-ray machine.

Anyways, for all that worrying, it was really uneventful. (In fact, I had more trouble with my carry-on luggage -- I forgot I had a socket wrench in there for my bike crank and they took it from me). I seriously seriously doubt they have time to x-ray all the checked luggage before boarding, and even less that they would care as long as your bag isn't clinking. My bag showed up, I stowed it in a drawer, and made sure to get ice whenever I had an opportunity. We left all our bottles of wine out, and no-one ever made a big deal about it. I bought a 'souvenir drink' the first day by accident (the guy came by and had a platter of drinks, and asked, 'would you like a drink', so I assumed it was free), which ended up working well, because later I would just fill it in my room using my booze and then carry it about the ship (classy, i know).

I did not have a problem bringing on mixers at ports of call, but they did (as I expected) take my bottle of tequila I bought in Mexico. You pretty much will NOT be able to take alcohol from ports of call through without it getting found, and I think that may be why people take those rum runners.

FWIW, the drink prices actually aren't that terrible -- $6-7 bucks for a mixed drink (including tip!) and $6 bucks (again, after tip) or so for a 22 oz beer (they had grolsch!). For me, that's a comparable price to most local bars. They do, however, make it very easy for you to run up a tab without noticing -- everything is put on your 'cruise card', so it's not like you can take an assessment by looking in your wallet.

We spent a lot of time in our stateroom when we weren't at port, because it really wasn't our scene. We also felt a little uncomfortable at dinner, because they just sort of throw you at a table of six with strangers, but admittedly, the people we were paired with were nice enough (i believe they pair by stateroom price). The food gets *real* tiresome after a couple days -- it's basically like eating at Fresh Choice or the like daily. The two things I would recommend are: 1. bring a laptop with movies (or a good novel)! I was really really glad I did this, and actually wish I brought a lot more films. and 2. if they are 'tendering' you ashore, it *is* worth it to get an early start.
posted by fishfucker at 7:56 PM on May 7, 2007