Gifts for first time mom- and two grandmas-to-be?

April 22, 2007 10:05 PM

Please recommend a special gift for my wife on Mother's Day. She'll be starting her second trimester with our first baby .

I apologize for having a hard time nailing down a description of what I'm looking for, but it's not flowers, spa treatments, or anything that I can do any other time of the year. I'm would like something that tells her how happy and excited I am that she's the one I get share the experience of parenting with. Yeah, it's corny but dammit, I love this woman and I'm crazy-excited that we're having a baby.

Bonus points: fun gifts for our moms this Mother's Day? They'll both be rookie grandmas.

posted by DakotaPaul to Shopping (16 answers total)

Write her a letter telling her how much you love her and how excited you are to be starting this new adventure with her and how much you look forward to spending the rest of your lives together. If she's anything like mrs. alms, she'll like that more than a box of chocolates.

You could always throw in a spa treatment, too, for good measure.
posted by alms at 10:32 PM on April 22, 2007

A night at a romantic bed and breakfast, or a mini-vacation, just the two of you.

Couples' massage classes.

Basically, anything that allows you each to focus on each other. When the baby comes, you're going to be focused on the little one. Your time together is a treasure.

As for the grandmas? Picture frames. Photo albums. High-speed internet for all of the picture-sending :)
posted by Ostara at 10:33 PM on April 22, 2007

For the grandma's, buy yourself a new digital camera.
posted by alms at 10:33 PM on April 22, 2007

Re. rookie grandmothers: The Good Granny Guide is a good read. I enjoyed it, and I think my mother did... It's well written, and has sound advice, though it's witty enough to not come off as a "Look, we think you're clueless" advisory.

Re. spa what-not: I don't know if my irritation is common, but, please stay with your instinct not to. One, everything purporting to be a pregnancy guide says "Buy her a day at the spa!" I can't think of anything I'd enjoy less right now (starting 3rd trime.) than strangers pawing me. I'd also think "This has nothing to do with me and who I usually am, and everything to do with the stereotype of what I should want. How thoughtful." (Ignore if it fits what she likes when not pregnant, though.)

Hrm. Think about what sorts of things you'd get her if she wasn't pregnant and you were just buying a present because. There's some frustration to be had in one's entire life being about the baby well before it even shows up. (Ignore if she is super-excited and that way herself, though.)

Possibilities:

Maternity clothes are often crap, so some high-value gift certificates to good places might be more appreciated than you know. A smashing outfit and a similarly great date to wear it on would make for a nice mother's day.

Go shopping, cash in hand, for an expensive stroller. Note that it's for yourself as well.

The "mini-vacation" idea is a good one. A weekend out of town at a B&B, one night in a posh hotel downtown -- you don't even have to leave the city though a week on a beach would be great -- anything; just take her somewhere and go.

Very corny: three sets of some sort of matching garment.

Gift certificates to her favourite restaurants, and the guarantee that you're squiring her there the moment she's inclined to visit them. I have had few blah pregnancy days that have not been pretty well fixed up by what follows "Look, I'm coming home to take you out for lunch."

I am not much for "scrapbooking," but I don't think anybody has any objections to what that word used to mean. A really nice blank book, or leather photo album with proper paper pages, plus a swank pen and some photo corners &c, say. Something to paste the ultrasound pictures into.

Pregnancy generates a lot of paperwork, so -- somewhat similarly -- a good portfolio couldn't hurt. Try somewhere like Levenger.

All that (er, hope I don't sound too greedy; just musing while insomniac) said, you can't beat your time. If you are in a position to take time off work, a whole lot of that that fits with her schedule (and, if she's not home? Clean the toilet) would be just the thing. Again hoping it doesn't sound greedy: you will have the rest of your lives to focus on the miracle of your procreation; right now, grab all the couple time you can get.
posted by kmennie at 1:31 AM on April 23, 2007 [1 favorite]

Honestly,

I second the letter idea.

If you have money to burn, and must buy her something, buy her jewelry.

Wong fei-hung
posted by Wong Fei-hung at 5:44 AM on April 23, 2007

get the nursery set up for her.
posted by thinkingwoman at 6:42 AM on April 23, 2007

Second trimester? This is the likely to be the roughest stretch of the pregnancy for her until delivery. Although everyone is different, this is where morning sickness can come in, as well as back- and assorted other aches, swelling ankles. Get up early and make here a banana-yogurt smoothie (with a side of fresh flowers) so that it's ready when she gets out of bed, and assure her that you are ready to get up every morning before her the rest of the way to make her morning a little easier.
posted by planetkyoto at 7:14 AM on April 23, 2007

Jewelry. Think pearls - ponder the parallels. Buy her the pendant for mother's day, and the earrings to give her at the hospital when she gives birth. At least that's what I'd like. (You can find them less pricey than my links.)
posted by orangemiles at 7:36 AM on April 23, 2007

It depends on what she likes. I'd second a getaway for you both. Or something time intensive, like deep cleaning the house.

Or anything that says "Mom" on it, like jewelry.

2nd Trimester is actually the EASIEST, not the worst, part of pregnancy. You aren't huge and exhausted yet, and past the sickness of first trimester.

Baby gear like a stroller wouldn't be my choice, because she'll get some things like that at the shower if you have one. But if there is a special piece she's been eyeing, maybe that.

Maybe have formal pics taken of her, pregnant, or you two together. Or a GC for family pics when the baby comes.
posted by mazienh at 7:40 AM on April 23, 2007

Seconding jewelry. Something great. Maybe a charm bracelet (a really good one, not a cheap silver plated thing) with a few charms that have some meaning to you both. You could add to it at various times in the years to come, when you want to mark an occasion with some sort of keepsake. If she's not a charm bracelet kind of girl, maybe a necklace with a pendant. If you give her a very nice high quality piece of jewelry, she'll always remember every time she looks at it: "DakotaPaul gave that to me on the Mother's Day before the baby came!"

That's what I would like, anyway. You can never go wrong with very good jewelry.

Congratulations on your impending bundle of joy!
posted by Kangaroo at 8:48 AM on April 23, 2007

I vote jewelry too. Something timeless, classic. Something sparkly.
posted by sonnet at 9:42 AM on April 23, 2007

Response by poster: Thank you all for the suggestions so far (especially kmennie -- wow!), and for the words of congratulations!

I was sort of thinking jewelry, but I got her some fun Scrabble earrings for xmas and pearl earrings and necklace for her birthday (January). Not that I think she's getting sick of that yet. I always do a thoughtful handmade card for birthdays and anniversaries, too. I'd like to keep baby gear off the list; like mazienh said, we'll probably get a lot of that stuff from parents and at showers.

The getaway is sounding good. Keep the suggestions coming!
posted by DakotaPaul at 10:52 AM on April 23, 2007

Best answer: Well, along the lines of letters and cards.. I was at the same spot in my first pregnancy (he's seven now) when Mother's Day rolled around. We were scheduled for an amino, but didn't yet know the baby's gender.

My husband got me two Mother's Day cards. One was very little-boyish, and had a little note from [our chose boy's name]. The other was very little girl-ish and and a note written from [our chosen girl's name]. You know, "Dear Mom, I can't wait to meet you, but having fun hanging out here...etc., etc." It was absolutely the silliest/corniest/sweetest thing ever -- I think my heart grew ten sizes that day. I'd never had a Mother's Day card (of course) and I'm still tearing up thinking about it -- all these years (and two kids) later. So, yeah, two cards -- kinda crazy but boy, do I love that man.
posted by bluemoonegg at 11:36 AM on April 23, 2007 [1 favorite]

I'm a new dad, too, and I know I'm a day late in posting this and nobody will read it, but what they hay! I'll give it a go anyways.

Two thoughts:
1. Foot Massage/Care by YOU. Surprise your wife by having a foot bath ready for her at the sofa (container that makes sense for a feet or a foot to fit in). Have some of her favorite snacks and a drink (non-alchy, of course) on a tray beside her. She may want to just watch TV. Or you might play some soft music that would relax her. After drying, you might oil-up your hands and give her feet a luxurious massage. Here is the thing to remember: a pregnant woman cannot reach her feet to tend them because of her new body ergonomics. She may not mention it to you, but if she was particularly kind to her feet before her pregnancy, she doesn't like the fact that she has been forced to abandon their care. Extra points if you polish her nails. I guarantee that you will be the only hubby amongst your friends who will do such a thing, and believe me she will know it too.

2. What kind of things is she saying. Any clues from her, no matter how outlandish should be taken seriously. Also, the more outlandish it is, the better you will feel about doing it. When I flew out of town for a weekend for work, I went to her favorite restaurant in this town and got a to-go order of her favorite meal. I flew it back to her so in good condition. She still raves over it.

Good luck, my friend. And welcome to the fraternity of paternity.
posted by boots77 at 2:30 PM on April 23, 2007

If you already know the baby's sex buy one or the other of the following books:

Girl: Someday
Boy: I'll Love You Forever

I just bought Someday for my daughters and daughter-in-law as gifts for Mother's Day. It's a precious little book for mothers of girls.

Or actually, just buy both books.
posted by rcavett at 2:52 PM on April 24, 2007

I would go with some mothers day chocolate covered strawberries. I ordered some of their berries for Valentines day this year and it was a hit. I like that they do all the work by hand, from picking out the berries to dipping them....biggest damn strawberries I ever saw.
posted by TheDude at 9:21 PM on April 25, 2007