My girlfriend does not get wet no more.
April 20, 2007 7:40 AM Subscribe
My girlfriend does not get wet during sex anymore.
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (52 answers total) 10 users marked this as a favorite
I feel bad writing this question out, but it has become a huge issue. When I first met my girl, she told me she had had sexual problems with her ex boyfriend. She did not get sexually aroused with him. However, with me, she had no such problem. She would get normally aroused during sex.
However, as our relationship has proceeded, though she still wants sex as much, she just does not get wet anymore. This has the effect that I'm rapidly losing interest in even trying to sleep with her. It is really a turn-off to have the feeling that the girl does not get excited about sleeping with you.
When we are in bed together, her nipples go erect, she enjoys the caressing and so on, and I know that she _wants_ to have sex. However, her body is not playing along. It's a bit like impotence in a man.
Recently there have been increasingly frequent occasions where I wanted sex, she was ready too, but I just could not put my penis in because of her dryness. But her nipples get all erect, and she moves and is responsive.
At the moment, the theory I'm working with is that she just in not that into me anymore, but is unwilling to admit it openly. I believe that this is not a physical issue, but more of a mental issue.
We don't even live in the same area, and after seeing each other after a month, we only had sex 3 times over a 7 day stay.
On the very last failed attempt, she blamed me for the problem. She said that I was not doing "things" to her to turn her on. This may be so, but how come she got turned on earlier in the relationship without me doing these "things"?
This issue is destroying my sexual interest in general. I used to like sex a lot, but this dry pussy thing is making me just not want to do it at all anymore. Not with her, not with anyone else. Sex is just not fun in this situation at all. My libido used to be high, now it's sinking like lava in butter.
What do I do about this? I can't talk to her without putting some blame on her, and this seems pointless, because it will make her even more anxious, leading to worse sex. My sex skills are not bad, so studying the kamasutra is not going to help much.
And no, I don't need therapy (or couples counselling), thanks for the suggestion.