Get out and do something, you punk kid!

March 22, 2007 4:00 PM

My 17-year-old little brother needs something enriching to do this summer. Any suggestions?

He is a very smart, straight-A kid (he just represented Haiti at the UN Model Conference for high school students in NYC, and debated in favour of a position paper he wrote in front of 3000 people in the General Assembly hall). He used to think of himself as the dumb kid compared to me and his older sister, but my parents sent him to a new school this year and he is suddenly excelling beyond our wildest hopes.

However some of his friends from his old school are not, shall we say, high achievers and are pressuring him to get a crappy retail job and spend the summer drinking in the park with them. As his older brother, I think it's my responsibility to encourage him to pursue something a bit more enriching than that. But I need some intruiging ideas to throw at him to get him thinking of the possibilities.

Anyone have some suggestions or leads? Examples I'm looking at would be volunteering somewhere out of the city, French lessons in Quebec City, camp counselling, a summer educational program, treeplanting... Personal anecdotes are extremely welcome.

ps we live in downtown Toronto, and our family budget is average middle-class meaning we can spring for something not too extravagant

posted by pcameron to Work & Money (29 answers total)

camp counseling is a great opportunity. I bet we could land him a job at the very basic Camp Unalayee in California. But, before that, why not look closer to home?

Treeplanting? Dude, seriously.

I spent my summers in high school (in northern california) at camp or in math class. Do not send your bro to math camp unless you are specifically asking "My 17-year-old little brother needs something to do that will enable him to never talk to me again. Any suggestions?"
posted by parmanparman at 4:16 PM on March 22, 2007

I think there's something to be said about "crappy retail jobs". There is quite a bit that a person can learn in terms of responsibility from this type of job especially since your brother is 17. I'm assuming this is one of, if not, his first job.

Why not work part time and take on some sort of volunteer activity as well?
posted by ASM at 4:16 PM on March 22, 2007

Does the UofT (or York, or...) have a 'special student' racket where he can take a course despite not having finished HS?

When I was 17, I was going to Carleton, working at a moderately crappy job, and drinking at the beach. Do not overlook the value of the latter two.
posted by kmennie at 4:22 PM on March 22, 2007

If he's got a good head on his shoulders, is reasonably ambitious, and intends to maintain his good scholastic momentum, I fail to see anything wrong with working a retail job for a summer with his lazy friends and drinking at the park.

One need not be uber-productive, continually bolstering one's college application or resume at every available moment.
posted by chimaera at 4:45 PM on March 22, 2007 [2 favorites]

Does he have some other interest or hobby you could encourage him to expand over the summer? Like, if he's interested in animals or the outdoors, a volunteer position at a wildlife rehab or a parks program or zoo might be fun. If he's interested in music, maybe a series of lessons for the instrument of his choice? Or if he's always shown an interest in another culture or place, a chance to visit that area... Or art lessons, or a fiction-writing course, if he likes drawing or writing... nothing that is blatantly "You have to spend your summer Being Productive", but just a chance for something to help encourage his other side, his other interests, not just schoolwork or "preparing for your working career". It ought to be something -fun- as well as enriching.
posted by Rubber Soul at 4:46 PM on March 22, 2007

What about getting a crappy job (learn responsibility! life experience!) and volunteering a bit?
posted by k8t at 4:47 PM on March 22, 2007

Some universities (at least in the US) will allow you to just up and take classes durring the summer session, no formal admissions process required. If you go this route, have him take classes in whatever he finds interesting, don't pressure him into what he "should" take.

On the other hand, crappy jobs can be more enriching than you realize. Everyone should try having a crappy minimum wage job sometime.
posted by yohko at 5:02 PM on March 22, 2007 [1 favorite]

If you're going to get a job, try to find something that you reasonably like. Crappy jobs only make you resentful and you learn nothing except how the world sucks. That said, what's "crappy" really depends on the person, so look at what he likes.

Your mention of the Model UN makes me think he'd be good in intercultural or international contexts. Is there some sort of non-profit in those areas he could explore? Cheap study-abroad?
posted by divabat at 5:40 PM on March 22, 2007

i agree that a crappy retail job and drinking in the park are edifying for a seventeen year old, but if you're looking for something else, that is also the age that a lot of precollege programs cater to...two months or so to get away from home, try out college life (probably including drinking in the park), see what a particular college is like, get an experience that looks good on college applications and, depending on the program even see what it's like to study a particular subject intensely.
posted by lgyre at 5:43 PM on March 22, 2007

pressuring him to get a crappy retail job

There are many entry-level jobs that are not crappy at all. I spent a summer working at a movie theater and had a blast. DisneyWorld hires summer help and puts them up in a dorm setting, and canoeing around Tom Sawyer's Island and hitting on 17-year-old girls will be something he'll remember forever.
posted by frogan at 5:46 PM on March 22, 2007

When my younger brother was 17 (and I had just finished college) I should have taken my last thin dime and gone on a road trip with him. If you think you have some wisdom to impart, do it yourself. I'm finally getting around to really connecting with my now mostly adult brother. We'd probably both be better off had we done something like that.
posted by GPF at 5:47 PM on March 22, 2007 [2 favorites]

Make him work the worst job ever. Ensures he will learn the value of a dollar. That's enriching. He may even want to study come next year so he won't have to do a hard job ever again.
posted by thetenthstory at 5:52 PM on March 22, 2007

Oddly, I thought summer programs were fun when I was a high schooler (but I was a little socially repressed too and liked meeting other kids like that). It totally depends on the kid. Maybe hand him a catalog of local summer programs that his high school compiles and see if he gets excited about something? Isn't it up to him anyway? Sometimes these also feature stipends (my parents, though poor, were able to fund my programs this way).

http://www.artsandscience.utoronto.ca/ps/programs.shtml
http://www.artsci.utoronto.ca/prospective/highschoolprograms/enrichment
An obvious one might be debate camp, as well.
posted by artifarce at 6:01 PM on March 22, 2007

Also, there's plenty of time for a job, and the things a job teaches can also be taught at home and potentially from jobs during the school year (moderate things like paid tutoring jobs at the high school). Those high school summers are like gold in time and opportunity.
posted by artifarce at 6:07 PM on March 22, 2007

He should be put to work. At a country club. There you get a nice cross-section of people (blue blood golfers down to the struggling for a paycheck dishwashers).

And it pays well too.
posted by ryecatcher at 6:12 PM on March 22, 2007

Would sailing on a tall ship float his boat?
posted by transient at 6:23 PM on March 22, 2007

ryecatcher, when I read your comment I immediately started hearing Kenny Loggins in my head and started to dance in my chair a little. Not sure why.
posted by miss lynnster at 6:33 PM on March 22, 2007

I'm in my late twenties now, and I regret the time I spent frivolously in my late teens.

Volunteer overseas. Travel a bit. Don't just waste time with a stupid job and stupid friends.
posted by Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America at 7:29 PM on March 22, 2007

Living abroad program?

I went with EIL approximately 4,000 years ago at 15 or 16 and it was a great experience. It certainly added a lot of value to the (minimal) drinking I shoehorned in.

I think I did Mexico because it was cheapest. They now seem to have a "Community Service and Travel" program, as well as a "Sustainable Development and Fair Trade" program, both of which look nifty.
posted by DarlingBri at 8:26 PM on March 22, 2007

Have him teach English to Burmese refugees in Northern Thailand.
posted by Kraftmatic Adjustable Cheese at 10:11 PM on March 22, 2007

I'm 17 and I'm spending the summer taking a required class for graduation through summer school, working, and volunteering. However, I spent the last three summers at Duke. I think both options are valuable, but really, let him decide. Working a shitty retail job might well teach him as much as an expensive pre-college program, but it really depends on what he wants to learn. If you send him to some program and all of his friends he doesn't see anymore at his new school are having fun at home, he'll hate it even if he's at like, sand castle making camp in Tahiti.

Basically, he's going to be deciding where he wants to spend the next four or so years of his life in a few months. Hopefully, he can handle deciding where to spend the summer.
posted by MadamM at 10:22 PM on March 22, 2007

My recommendation is to encourage him to do something related to a hobby of his. Other than that, your claim that it's your "responsibility to encourage him to pursue something a bit more enriching" than a "crappy retail job," is odd--any summer job you get at age 17 is likely to be menial and pointless. Might as well enjoy his time while doing it.
posted by Subcommandante Cheese at 10:27 PM on March 22, 2007

The deadline has already passed, but if he is in 11th grade going into 12th grade, he is eligible to participate in the Economics for Leaders program - http://www.fte.org/students/efl/ - I would highly recommend it. It takes place at various college campuses across the US and is open to Canadians. If you're accepted, you pay for airfare and everything else is covered. If you're interested in more info, email is in profile.
posted by perpetualstroll at 10:33 PM on March 22, 2007

When I was 17, I spent my summer at this program in Oxford, England. It was a really great experience; I had just the right amount of freedom for that age, gained a huge *sense* of independence, and actually learned a great deal from my intentionally frivolous classes (I did playwriting and film, there were much more rigorous and useful classes available). In addition, Oxford is an absolutely beautiful city, and because it's really only a month-long program, he'll be able to hang out at least a bit with his old friends. As a cliched sidenote, I'm still in touch with my best friends from there.
posted by awesomebrad at 12:08 AM on March 23, 2007

My sister went on an Outward Bound( warning, flash) trip and really enjoyed it. I don't know what you mean by "extravagant" though so I'm not sure if this is something you would be able to afford.

If you or he have any questions I can forward them on to her.
posted by ODiV at 12:12 AM on March 23, 2007

Unless his friends are Bad Kids, there's no reason he shouldn't work a crappy retail job with them. Working is good and important and so on. It's real world experience which many kids of his generation are absolutely lacking.
posted by misanthropicsarah at 7:25 AM on March 23, 2007

A NOLS course would be an incredible experience, if he's at all into the outdoors. I wish wish wish I had known about them when I was his age. It's spendy, but from what I hear, totally worth it.
posted by vytae at 9:03 AM on March 23, 2007

It's funny to see the huge disparity between the "be a real person" crowd and the "forget about real people" crowd. I wonder if there's a correlation between people's answers and their family incomes.

I can only tell my story. I was involved with about everything when I was a kid. Odyssey of the Mind, Future Problem Solvers (both great programs, BTW), numerous music and theatre groups, Model UN, Leadership conferences, MathCounts, theatre camps, gifted camps, lots of volunteering.

And in retrospect, these things (with the exception of OM) did very little to contribute to my current life (writer, performer). I didn't feel less ostracized at these sorts of programs than I did during the school year; I felt way more ostracized, more socially unprepared, more... awkward. At the gifted camps, it seemed that everyone was just interested in sneaking out to get drunk and make out. At the theatre camps, everyone was super competitive and just plain mean to each other.

Again, I can only speak for myself here. I really don't know about anyone else's experience. But it now seems like a lot of those programs were more about sheltering kids from the real academic world than exposing them to it. Rather than reading books, we were working off of other people's summaries of those books.

If I could go back and talk to my kid self, I think I'd say two things. Don't forget to brush your teeth, and read every day.

So here's my crazy suggestion. Work with your brother to put together a summer reading list. This should be based on his interests, but with an eye toward expanding his interests and challenging him. Be hard on him; make sure he's downing a couple of books a week. But be sure there are plenty of fun books in the mix too. Get in discussions with him about what he's reading, have him keep a journal of what he's reading and thinking about. Don't make him write papers; that's too much like school. But get in discussions and arguments with him about what he's reading.

He should learn to love hanging out at the library, but buy him some good books too. In my opinion, they're a far more meaningful and lasting gift than another leadership camp.

Get him a subscription to Harpers, or the Believer, or--if he's ready for it--some more serious academic journals.

Going drinking at the park with his friends? That's fine, in moderation. But be sure he brings along something to read if he gets bored, which he will.

Yohko is smart. College classes are a great idea. Be sure they're ones he's really interested in and excited about. Again, it's all about being exposed to thinking outside of the teenager-safe world.
posted by roll truck roll at 10:23 AM on March 23, 2007 [1 favorite]

I spent a summer in high school interning at a homeless shelter. One of the best experiences of my life, got me really into volunteering at a young age. Non profits are usually grateful for committed volunteers, and often at a nonprofit because it's smaller and lower budget than a for-profit business, you get to learn a ton and talk to a lot of neat people.
posted by radioamy at 11:02 AM on March 23, 2007