I want to look like Lady Godiva

December 11, 2006 3:54 PM

Help me stay sane while I grow out my hair.

I am 26 years old and have had short hair for the past 12 or so years. During my entire teenage life I had a very short "pixie" haircut (like Twiggy or Mia Farrow in "Rosemary's Baby") but decided a few years ago to grow that out. I kept my hair slightly longer for awhile but now I'm ready to really grow it out — I haven't had long hair since I was a little kid!

I moved to Korea 18 months ago and decided this would be a good time to start. Now my hair is chin-length, just barely long enough to put in a ponytail with the help of some bobby pins. A few days ago I had a breakthrough — I put on a turtleneck, and actually had to sweep the hair off the back of my neck out of my shirt. Sweet.

However, it is driving me crazy! It is very thick, shapeless, and sort of half-wavy, half-straight. It's pretty dry, but I'm working very hard on keeping it conditioned and healthy. In August 2005 I had a stress-induced bout of alopecia which scared the crap out of me, and I have now committed not to treat it with chemicals or heat. I don't even blow dry.

I actually like my hair in it's natural state but I'm trying to go from layers to long with as much patience as possible. I also don't trust the hairdressers here, as I live in a pretty rural area and they aren't too sure how to deal with Caucasian hair.

This (self-link to Flickr) is what it looks like now. This is my first goal.

I searched the hair tag but didn't find much. Links are welcome, and advice, products, anecdotes and morale would be appreciated. Thanks.

posted by Brittanie to clothing, beauty, & fashion (18 answers total)

It looks fine. One of the secrets to growning hair out is to not be mental, to accept that there are awkward phases that usually last less than a month, and that shifting where you part your hair can be really handy in getting more millage out of one cut.
posted by klangklangston at 4:00 PM on December 11, 2006

I have hair that's pretty similar to yours. I get good behavior out of it by only washing it every third day or so, and touseling in some mousse or gel while it's wet, and then letting it dry without touching it. It usually looks best on the second day after a shampoo. You look adorable in that photo you linked to, so you don't have to worry about looking dorky while it grows out. If it's bugging you, how about wearing a headband? Tie a scarf around your head. Wear a bandana. Use bobby pins to hold the front sections in flat little buns behind your ears. Wear pigtails. Do two french braids. Now you can do all that fun stuff you couldn't do when your hair was short-- enjoy it!
posted by bonheur at 4:01 PM on December 11, 2006

It looks really cute and not at all like a growing-it-out hairstyle. But for healthy hair "they" say Biotin is good.
posted by necessitas at 4:04 PM on December 11, 2006

I'm growing mine out, too- every few years I grow out my ultra short hair (only to cut it a few years later- viscious cycle). So I feel your pain. I'm taking Fish Oil and Biotin vitamins, and I think they're helping to speed things along.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 4:08 PM on December 11, 2006 [1 favorite]

When I went from short->long, it took about 8 months to get manageable. The worst part was doing anything physical because I'd have to put my hair up in a pebbles top knot to keep it out of my face, and let me tell you, that look didn't work for a 25-year old man.

I kept it long for 7 or 8 years and here's what I did:
1. Stopped using rubber band type hair ties and went with stretchy terry cloth. The former tends to break your hair and make split ends.
2. Got myself a copy of Klutz's Braids and Bows because I figured I should learn how to do this sometime.
3. Found a really, really cheap conditioner that I liked. Washed my hair daily (others will tell you less), used a big handful of conditioner on the bottom six inches and let that sit while I washed the rest of me, then rinsed it out.
4. Dried my hair mostly with a towel, a little bit with a hair drier, but only just enough so that it was easy to brush, not bone dry.
5. Brushed my hair from the ends working up to scalp
6. Got one or two trims every year to cut off split ends. My hair grows at a rate of about an inch every month, so every six months, I'd have 6 more inches and I'd take off 2 or three.
7. When I finally got tired of it, I kept the pony tail when it was cut off so I could show my grandkids that I did have auburn hair once.

By the way, I think half-wavy looks great - way more texture/highlights than straight.
posted by plinth at 4:10 PM on December 11, 2006

My hair isn't very different from yours, and I've grown it out from pixie to long a couple of times at this point.

The absolute most important thing is to just accept your hair. Some days it will look crap. Some days not so much. Just convince yourself that whatever your hair is doing is cute. (Which, frankly, looking at your photos, it is.)

You're over the roughest part, which for me was the part where it's about 3 inches long all over, too short for a ponytail, too long for a headband.

Headbands are your friends. So are long scarves worn as headbands. Twin braids and/or pigtails on either side are also useful. Bobby pins and alligator clips are great. Doubling up a headband/scarf with a ponytail is both cute and functional. On days when the convincing yourself that it's cute really isn't working, go for a bandanna.

Good luck! It gets easier from here on out!
posted by fuzzbean at 4:37 PM on December 11, 2006

Oh man. Goody's bobby slides are essential. I don't know if you can buy them in Korea, but they're amazing. Bobby slides are thicker than bobby pins so they grab substantial amounts of hair, but thin enough so you can use a few without a problem. They slide out wicked easily, but have a better grip on your hair than regular barrettes.

Um...I don't work for Goody or anything, but I used these when I was growing my bangs out and loved them. Maybe there's a Korean version?
posted by landedjentry at 4:56 PM on December 11, 2006

Your hair looks great at the moment, but I know how you're feeling. I have my hair short, only just too short for a ponytail. I have attempted to grow it out a couple of times, but there is a definite psychological barrier to doing so - you're not used to seeing your hair that long and so there is a definite impulse to cut it, despite everybody telling you that it looks great.

As it grows longer, have a hairdresser (or some friend that you trust to cut your hair) cut a few layers into it - it will thin it out a little and make the transition a little more manageable. Invest in combs and headbands and scarves and clips - they will be a lifesaver on the inevitable bad hair days, everybody has them, regardless of how much they like their hairstyles.
posted by cholly at 5:08 PM on December 11, 2006

Your hair right now is adorable.

My hair is usually long (it grows very fast), aside from a couple of chin-length bobs I tried out in college. Not blow-drying your hair is a great idea - I never blow dry mine and my hairdresser is always amazed at how healthy my hair is. I've gone without a trim for 6 months and had no split ends or broken hair.

Right now, I am seeing a lot of girls in my office who have hair around your length wear thick headbands and scarves in their hair, and it looks *really* cute. I'm jealous, but my hair is too long to look good pulled back at all. I would definitely try getting some headbands to play with in addition to barrettes and bobby pins.

Good luck!
posted by tastybrains at 5:56 PM on December 11, 2006

I dunno if this will help your morale, but you should at least take a few seconds to thank god you're of a gender that allows barrettes and alice bands.

I've grown my hair out twice, and the umpteen months between hair-starts-hanging-in-eyes and viable ponytails is absolutely excruciating.

Hang in there...
posted by tkolar at 6:30 PM on December 11, 2006

Wow, thanks everyone for the advice. What fascinates me about this question is the number of men who've answered!
posted by Brittanie at 6:32 PM on December 11, 2006

I've had my hair long for about 11 years now; at its longest part, my hair is basically to my waist.

1. Don't blow dry every day (seems you don't at all, but it is ok as long as you don't over-do it).
2. Use gentle hair-ties -- Goody makes some that have no elastic at all, or they're totally covered with cotton thread, with no metal part. They're called "Firm and Light" or "Firm and Tight," I think.
3. Massage your scalp when you wash your hair.
4. Use good shampoo and conditioner if at all possible.
5. If you were dying your hair, I would tell you to stop because that makes it really hard to have nice long hair, but it seems you eschew the chemicals.

My hair is naturally straight and is very fine, so what works for me product-wise may not work for you, but I use Bed Head After Party on a pretty every day basis (that or Bed Head HeadRush, if I'm feeling like the other stuff will weight it down) and I use the Self-Absorbed shampoo and conditioner. The girl who cuts my hair says I have super healthy hair, so I'm guessing that means the regimen is working. Cutting layers is good if you go super long -- or even just midlength, so when you get back to the states, don't feel bad if you want to get rid of some of the weight. If your hair is at all thick, having it all one length will be pretty tiring. I'm trying to de-layer mine at the moment just because I'm tired of it, but I don't know how that will work out in the end. It may drive me insane.
posted by Medieval Maven at 7:23 PM on December 11, 2006

I just wanted to speak up, too - I'm currently growing my hair out, and find that some days, it rocks, and some days, it sucks. I basically just remember that not very many people pay that much attention to me, and that person with whom I'm going to sleep will see some bad but probably some good, too.

Also, it's not so shocking to see a lot of guys speak up. For those of us with long hair, very few have had it all of our lives, and many have probably done the short-long-short transition many times.
posted by TheNewWazoo at 7:29 PM on December 11, 2006

your hair is super cute. stay the course. by my calculations, you'll be an olsen triplet in about 4 months
posted by twistofrhyme at 8:00 PM on December 11, 2006

Four months?! Really! Hmm. That gives me more hope.
posted by Brittanie at 8:33 PM on December 11, 2006

here's what you should do: shave your head and get multiple wigs.

do what tastes right.
posted by 29 at 8:42 PM on December 11, 2006 [1 favorite]

/me thwaps 29 and recommends a nice selection of barettes, clips, bands, and other keeping-hair-out-of-face devices. Experiment and use what works best.
posted by ilsa at 8:46 PM on December 11, 2006

"What fascinates me about this question is the number of men who've answered!"

I cut my hair twice a year; once in spring and once in late summer. I always cut it really short, it always gets to be about collar length before I cut it again. When I was younger, I had hair down to the middle of my back that I cut and let regrow a couple times.
So yeah, I've done the hair transition thing. As has my brother, who's now following in my footsteps (though he can rock the thing, whose name I've forgotten, that looks like a U and keeps hair off your face).
posted by klangklangston at 9:22 PM on December 11, 2006