Help me build my ADD fortress of solitude!
October 20, 2006 1:46 PM Subscribe
Screw doctors, I have diagnosed myself with adult attention deficit disorder. I can keep it in control by limiting my exposure to distracting stimuli, but occasionally I need a place to retreat.
My two bedroom house is too small sometimes to escape the ambient household noises of the wife or toddler kid. The only time it is really a problem is when my wife wants to watch TV. (Only ER and Gilmore girls luckily). For some reason when that damn tv turns on, my senses are assaulted, I get distracted, can't concentrate, and I feel like a cornered animal that needs a place to escape to. Apparently I also become an unbearable ass and am easily upset. But its only when the ambient noise/activity/? surpasses a certain threshold.
Just going to another room of the house has not worked, so in last week's scheduled sensory assault, I started thinking about how when I was a kid, my dad, his dad, and his dad all had their "workshops" that they would occasionally disappear into. Unfortunately I neither have the talent nor the inclination to have a "workshop". There must be some way to construct my own special fortress of solitude that I can use as a haven in just these times.
So Mefites, I need your advice. Here are the major criteria / observations.
#1 Cost of this project can not exceed $500
#2 My car cant fit in my tiny garage, so that a possible space to use, but as I will be selling my house in under 5 years I do not want to modify it in any permanent way. I would like it to remain a usable garage.
#3 It gets cold in Kansas in the winter, and the garage is not heated.
#4 I have a HUGE backyard, so an outdoor structure is feasible I guess, but see above.
#5 Aesthetics are not priority, but I would like to create some ambiance.
My only real idea so far is to find/buy a big old freestanding heavy canvas tent (army surplus) and set it up INSIDE the garage. In the tent, I could string paper garden lanterns for light, and pull in a small electric space heater to keep me warm in winter. My best reasoning says that this would mask the illusion of just sitting in the garage, and that the double insulation of heavy canvas inside of the garage itself could be easy enough to stay moderately warm. A comfy old recliner, and several books, posters, and other creature comforts would complete the effect.
But before I tackle this project I want to see if any of you have good ideas. So, do you?
My two bedroom house is too small sometimes to escape the ambient household noises of the wife or toddler kid. The only time it is really a problem is when my wife wants to watch TV. (Only ER and Gilmore girls luckily). For some reason when that damn tv turns on, my senses are assaulted, I get distracted, can't concentrate, and I feel like a cornered animal that needs a place to escape to. Apparently I also become an unbearable ass and am easily upset. But its only when the ambient noise/activity/? surpasses a certain threshold.
Just going to another room of the house has not worked, so in last week's scheduled sensory assault, I started thinking about how when I was a kid, my dad, his dad, and his dad all had their "workshops" that they would occasionally disappear into. Unfortunately I neither have the talent nor the inclination to have a "workshop". There must be some way to construct my own special fortress of solitude that I can use as a haven in just these times.
So Mefites, I need your advice. Here are the major criteria / observations.
#1 Cost of this project can not exceed $500
#2 My car cant fit in my tiny garage, so that a possible space to use, but as I will be selling my house in under 5 years I do not want to modify it in any permanent way. I would like it to remain a usable garage.
#3 It gets cold in Kansas in the winter, and the garage is not heated.
#4 I have a HUGE backyard, so an outdoor structure is feasible I guess, but see above.
#5 Aesthetics are not priority, but I would like to create some ambiance.
My only real idea so far is to find/buy a big old freestanding heavy canvas tent (army surplus) and set it up INSIDE the garage. In the tent, I could string paper garden lanterns for light, and pull in a small electric space heater to keep me warm in winter. My best reasoning says that this would mask the illusion of just sitting in the garage, and that the double insulation of heavy canvas inside of the garage itself could be easy enough to stay moderately warm. A comfy old recliner, and several books, posters, and other creature comforts would complete the effect.
But before I tackle this project I want to see if any of you have good ideas. So, do you?
If it's the noise that bothers you maybe look into a pair of wireless headphones for your wife to wear when watching tv? Less expensive, though not nearly as cool as a fortress of solitude. If seeing the images bugs you too, though, it wouldn't work.
posted by MsMolly at 2:19 PM on October 20, 2006
posted by MsMolly at 2:19 PM on October 20, 2006
You might want to go out there awhile before it gets cold, while the TV and toddler are operating full blast, to see how much noise isolation you really get. Common interior walls to a garage are often not insulated, and if there is a common attic overhead, you might find that garage ceiling isn't insulated either, so that what noise makes it up through a bedroom ceiling is pretty obvious out in the garage.
If you've got a big back yard, and want to do something interesting/useful to subsequent owners for a Kansas house, why not consider a storm cellar out back [link is to a guy who used a precast concrete storm shelter from a mortuary vault company to make a wine "cellar"]? More than your $500 budget, and much more work than your garage idea, but if you don't get the sound isolation you need out in the garage, you'll have to think about a seperate structure anyway. The investment you make could be recouped at the time you sell.
posted by paulsc at 2:19 PM on October 20, 2006
If you've got a big back yard, and want to do something interesting/useful to subsequent owners for a Kansas house, why not consider a storm cellar out back [link is to a guy who used a precast concrete storm shelter from a mortuary vault company to make a wine "cellar"]? More than your $500 budget, and much more work than your garage idea, but if you don't get the sound isolation you need out in the garage, you'll have to think about a seperate structure anyway. The investment you make could be recouped at the time you sell.
posted by paulsc at 2:19 PM on October 20, 2006
My dad's fortress of solitude consisted of a closed room with guys like these.
You can buy outdoor space heaters that use propane instead of electricity. Why not buy a steel shed, and insulate the walls somehow?
posted by LoriFLA at 2:34 PM on October 20, 2006
You can buy outdoor space heaters that use propane instead of electricity. Why not buy a steel shed, and insulate the walls somehow?
posted by LoriFLA at 2:34 PM on October 20, 2006
Do you have ADD or ADHD? ADHD is one that is misunderstood quite often.
Attention Defecit and Hyperactivity Disorder often has the Hyperactivity portion mistaken as physical hyperactivity. However, the attention is the part that is either deficient (Hypo-active) or amplified (Hyper-active.)
If you have true ADHD rather than ADD, you may have some options open to you.
What drives it is, often, the level of personel interest. Think of it as a see-saw or a balance. For most people, the weight on each side is defined by how important the item is perceived to be.
With ADD, the weight is always close to the same, so the slightest breeze can shift it.
With ADHD, it is the same as ADHD, with one exception. Your interest in an item functions as a much greater weight than it would normally be. It will overwhelm a perception of importance that a person without it would be able to pay attention to.
This being said, what you do will need to depend on what your case is.
If you have borderline ADHD or ADD, believe it or not, a bit of caffene can help enough by boosting chemical levels just enough to allow you to focus or not, as needed.
If you have ADD, and not ADHD, having a work room or private space may not help at all, as your interest may not override the distractions.
If you have ADHD, then you may find that doing anything you have a great interest in (even reading Metafilter) is enough.
posted by slavlin at 2:40 PM on October 20, 2006
Attention Defecit and Hyperactivity Disorder often has the Hyperactivity portion mistaken as physical hyperactivity. However, the attention is the part that is either deficient (Hypo-active) or amplified (Hyper-active.)
If you have true ADHD rather than ADD, you may have some options open to you.
What drives it is, often, the level of personel interest. Think of it as a see-saw or a balance. For most people, the weight on each side is defined by how important the item is perceived to be.
With ADD, the weight is always close to the same, so the slightest breeze can shift it.
With ADHD, it is the same as ADHD, with one exception. Your interest in an item functions as a much greater weight than it would normally be. It will overwhelm a perception of importance that a person without it would be able to pay attention to.
This being said, what you do will need to depend on what your case is.
If you have borderline ADHD or ADD, believe it or not, a bit of caffene can help enough by boosting chemical levels just enough to allow you to focus or not, as needed.
If you have ADD, and not ADHD, having a work room or private space may not help at all, as your interest may not override the distractions.
If you have ADHD, then you may find that doing anything you have a great interest in (even reading Metafilter) is enough.
posted by slavlin at 2:40 PM on October 20, 2006
Response by poster: Good suggestions - I think I need more than headphones in the bedroom. I made a pair of jack hammer headphones with a decibel reduction ratio of 29 db. It really helps, but the visual distractions are a problem too.
I think it may not be ADD proper, but more a sudden change in lifestlye. I grew up as an only child and then lived by myself after that. All that changed 2 years ago when I met my beautiful wife to be and her awesome then 2 year old. We've become a loving, happy, close family. It has been an adjustment to go from my previous lifestyle to now having to be very deliberate about carving out "me time". Sometimes I miss just lying on the couch, staring at the ceiling listening to old punk albums, but then I realize how frickin awesome my family is and I have no regrets.
Well, one regret. I've never had a kick ass clubhouse. I need a space that is MINE! All mine.
posted by jlowen at 2:42 PM on October 20, 2006
I think it may not be ADD proper, but more a sudden change in lifestlye. I grew up as an only child and then lived by myself after that. All that changed 2 years ago when I met my beautiful wife to be and her awesome then 2 year old. We've become a loving, happy, close family. It has been an adjustment to go from my previous lifestyle to now having to be very deliberate about carving out "me time". Sometimes I miss just lying on the couch, staring at the ceiling listening to old punk albums, but then I realize how frickin awesome my family is and I have no regrets.
Well, one regret. I've never had a kick ass clubhouse. I need a space that is MINE! All mine.
posted by jlowen at 2:42 PM on October 20, 2006
Hmm...It's Kansas, so I guess heading down to the local bar for a beer or two is out? I think you've got an awesome idea, though. Can you dig a hole under your garage(like a finished basement sorta thing), so it'll be more insulated and stay warmer?
posted by Mr. Gunn at 2:44 PM on October 20, 2006
posted by Mr. Gunn at 2:44 PM on October 20, 2006
I don't think you have ADD, it's just a normal response to changed conditions. I often feel exactly the same - it's very difficult to tune out TV (although I find some programmes more difficult to ignore than others). I do the washing up and potter around listening to radio programmes on my ipod.
posted by Huw at 2:55 PM on October 20, 2006
posted by Huw at 2:55 PM on October 20, 2006
jlowen, I can honestly say I completely understand what you mean... The noise of other people's music, TV shows, phone conversations, etc., can sometimes really aggravate & distract me. Like you, I know *they* aren't doing anything wrong at all; it's *my* problem.
Anyway, I thought about this while preparing dinner, and had an idea: an ice shelter. I'm not a fisherman of any sort, but a guy I used to work with used to go ice fishing every winter, and he often spoke of his "ice shack." It had a heater, a generator, a small recliner, tables, etc., and he said even if he never caught a fish, he loved every second he spent in his shack.
You mentioned cold weather, $500 budget, non-permanent structure, a small garage, and a large yard; an ice shelter seems to fit the bill.
You can buy plans to build your own, buy a new, pre-built one, or possibly find a used one.
I found a few links that may help get you started, if this seems like something you want to consider:
Nodak Outdoors
Ice Fishing World
Thorne Bros
Up North Outdoors
Ice Fishing House Central
Cabela's
(I have no idea where in KS you are, but there's a Cabela's in Kansas City, KS:
Kansas City, KS Retail Showroom
10300 Cabela Drive
Kansas City, Kansas 66111
913-328-0322
Best of luck to you!
posted by NYScott at 3:22 PM on October 20, 2006 [1 favorite]
Anyway, I thought about this while preparing dinner, and had an idea: an ice shelter. I'm not a fisherman of any sort, but a guy I used to work with used to go ice fishing every winter, and he often spoke of his "ice shack." It had a heater, a generator, a small recliner, tables, etc., and he said even if he never caught a fish, he loved every second he spent in his shack.
You mentioned cold weather, $500 budget, non-permanent structure, a small garage, and a large yard; an ice shelter seems to fit the bill.
You can buy plans to build your own, buy a new, pre-built one, or possibly find a used one.
I found a few links that may help get you started, if this seems like something you want to consider:
Nodak Outdoors
Ice Fishing World
Thorne Bros
Up North Outdoors
Ice Fishing House Central
Cabela's
(I have no idea where in KS you are, but there's a Cabela's in Kansas City, KS:
Kansas City, KS Retail Showroom
10300 Cabela Drive
Kansas City, Kansas 66111
913-328-0322
Best of luck to you!
posted by NYScott at 3:22 PM on October 20, 2006 [1 favorite]
Hating on TV is just a sign of unusually good mental health, IMO.
Perhaps it would amuse you to put up a house of straw in Tornado Alley :-)
posted by flabdablet at 3:31 PM on October 20, 2006
Perhaps it would amuse you to put up a house of straw in Tornado Alley :-)
posted by flabdablet at 3:31 PM on October 20, 2006
the thriftshops around here sometimes have throw-rugs. that would be nice on the ground.
posted by amethysts at 4:03 PM on October 20, 2006
posted by amethysts at 4:03 PM on October 20, 2006
This sounds more like a sensory integration issue rather than ADD. (I have no stake in that link it was just one of the first ones in a search. I would recommend you do some research on it.)
As for the guy space, you know the garage is an oft favorite. Get yourself a TV, a small fridge, some heat and perhaps some wall coverings. Clean the floor or put down cheap carpet remnants. Oh, don't forget a comfy chair.
posted by caddis at 4:21 PM on October 20, 2006
As for the guy space, you know the garage is an oft favorite. Get yourself a TV, a small fridge, some heat and perhaps some wall coverings. Clean the floor or put down cheap carpet remnants. Oh, don't forget a comfy chair.
posted by caddis at 4:21 PM on October 20, 2006
Metafilter seems like a pretty counter-intuitive place to hang out if you're looking to get away from distracting stimuli.
posted by matildaben at 4:51 PM on October 20, 2006
posted by matildaben at 4:51 PM on October 20, 2006
Earplugs or headphones are probably your best solution. You can try silence or music, whichever works best for you. You might find quiet classical music relaxing. Or you could even ask *her* to wear headphones - say wireless ones receiving the sound from the TV.
posted by Joe in Australia at 5:09 AM on October 21, 2006
posted by Joe in Australia at 5:09 AM on October 21, 2006
I have an idea but I don't know what times these shows are on tv, so it may be utter nonsense. Take the child somewhere during mom's tv time! Ice cream, grocery store, park, long walk through the neighborhood. Doesn't matter, as we saw in the daddy/daughter thread, ritual/consistensy with father is very important to small children. The flip side of that coin is that quiet time is very important to mothers, and if I can stretch this metaphor even farther, your tv free evening time sounds important to you.
This suggestion is also not terribly effective if you can't be or seem genuinely excited to hang out alone with the kid regularly, because kids can tell. It's also not effective if the kid is asleep during the times that these shows are airing. But, maybe the shows could be recorded and watched at a time when you could take an outing?
And bless you for making an effort to be less of an ass rather than becoming more of one!
posted by bilabial at 7:26 AM on October 21, 2006
This suggestion is also not terribly effective if you can't be or seem genuinely excited to hang out alone with the kid regularly, because kids can tell. It's also not effective if the kid is asleep during the times that these shows are airing. But, maybe the shows could be recorded and watched at a time when you could take an outing?
And bless you for making an effort to be less of an ass rather than becoming more of one!
posted by bilabial at 7:26 AM on October 21, 2006
Emergency solution for this would be to have a long shower/bath or something like that... an excuse to just hole up in the bathroom for a while. Setting up an evening ritual where you disappear to the bathroom for 45 minutes might work while you're getting the garage ready.
Priorities for the garage: insulation, including for the ground. Heat source. Chair. Once you have your own livably-warm space, you can just go in there, sit in the chair and shut your eyes. Or read, or do some little hobbyish dad project (model boats or trains! jigsaw puzzle! woodworking!). So, the real question is, cheapest effective insulating material for walls and floor of a garage? Most effective heat source for same?
Definitely rugs for the floor. (Does it have oil/gas/etc staining in it? If so, put down some other surface under the rugs.)Second-hand shops will have some, also anyplace that sells carpet will have scraps for cheap. I don't know about the walls; there must be some very utilitarian-looking kind of insulating material that you can get in big slabs and tamp together around the inside walls of the garage. If nobody here has thoughts, maybe you could ask at the hardware store.
posted by LobsterMitten at 9:24 PM on October 22, 2006
Priorities for the garage: insulation, including for the ground. Heat source. Chair. Once you have your own livably-warm space, you can just go in there, sit in the chair and shut your eyes. Or read, or do some little hobbyish dad project (model boats or trains! jigsaw puzzle! woodworking!). So, the real question is, cheapest effective insulating material for walls and floor of a garage? Most effective heat source for same?
Definitely rugs for the floor. (Does it have oil/gas/etc staining in it? If so, put down some other surface under the rugs.)Second-hand shops will have some, also anyplace that sells carpet will have scraps for cheap. I don't know about the walls; there must be some very utilitarian-looking kind of insulating material that you can get in big slabs and tamp together around the inside walls of the garage. If nobody here has thoughts, maybe you could ask at the hardware store.
posted by LobsterMitten at 9:24 PM on October 22, 2006
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by Anonymous at 2:06 PM on October 20, 2006