A joke for all seasons... er, each season

September 26, 2006 10:13 AM

I'm looking for short jokes, riddles, tongue twisters, or funny sayings about each month of the year. Think "April showers bring May flowers, so what do Mayflowers bring?" Anyone have more?

Major U.S. holiday and seasonal jokes will do in a pinch, but we want to stick to non-denominational jokes. (This is for my mom's classroom.)

posted by Soliloquy to society & culture (17 comments total)

First of the month, a pinch and a punch!

maybe not great for the classroom, I admit

I'm out.
posted by unSane at 10:16 AM on September 26, 2006

March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb.
posted by jrossi4r at 10:18 AM on September 26, 2006

Mayflowers bring pilgrims. And smallpox.
posted by klangklangston at 10:29 AM on September 26, 2006 [1 favorite]

"I'll take months beginning with 'Feb', Alex."

"This is the only month that begins with 'Feb'."

*DING* "Febtober!"
posted by jozxyqk at 10:37 AM on September 26, 2006

30 days hath September,
April, June, and November,
All the rest have 31,
Except February, with 28 or 29, which breaks scan anyway...
posted by paulsc at 10:50 AM on September 26, 2006

How many months contain 28 days?
All twelve.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 10:51 AM on September 26, 2006

Possibly related: Please Try to Remember the First of Octember
posted by leapingsheep at 10:52 AM on September 26, 2006

30 days hath September,
All the rest I can't remember
posted by rocket88 at 10:59 AM on September 26, 2006

Remember, remember the 5th of November.

Okay, I suppose that's not much of a joke. But it certainly is catchy.
posted by chrisamiller at 11:00 AM on September 26, 2006

Well, kinda sorta, but what the heck (3F04):

Marge: [voice over] It all started on the thirteenth hour, of the thirteenth day, of the thirteenth month. We were there to discuss the misprinted calendars the school had purchased.

Homer: [shivering, looking at the calendar] Oh, lousy Smarch weather.
posted by Skot at 11:28 AM on September 26, 2006

(Paraphrase)

They made February into Black History Month just in case we wanted to have a parade.

Uh, Chris Rock?
posted by unixrat at 12:14 PM on September 26, 2006

why are soldiers so tired in april?

they've had a long march
posted by pyramid termite at 12:18 PM on September 26, 2006

Maybe not quite what you're looking for, but there's the Flanders and Swann song, "A Song of the Weather".
posted by ObscureReferenceMan at 12:19 PM on September 26, 2006

Oh! Just remembered a great (?) joke...
Q. What's the most commanding day of the year?
A. March 4th!
posted by ObscureReferenceMan at 12:21 PM on September 26, 2006

I don't know of any jokes like this right now...check back on the 32nd of Nevuary.
posted by Brian James at 12:30 PM on September 26, 2006

Not really a joke, but kids seem to like learning the knuckle calendar.
posted by rob511 at 2:48 PM on September 26, 2006

Hooray, hooray, for the first of May, outdoor necking starts today.

(Or, you know, you could use a different word than "necking." Depends on how old the kids are...)

If cold December gave you birth/the month of ice and snow and mirth/place on your hand a turquoise blue/success will bless whate'er you do.
OR

We have memories so that we might have roses in December (originally "God gave us memories...")
posted by GaelFC at 10:15 PM on September 26, 2006