Name that team of soccer nerds!

September 1, 2006 8:16 AM

Name our soccer team, oh great AskMetafilter. I want something funny, potentially crude, potentially offensive, and hopefully tied in with the fact that we play for an applied math and physics department.

Additional details: Columbia University in NYC, Applied Math/Applied Physics Department (APAM), graduate students, all-male team. We were pretty bad last year but we try hard!

posted by onalark to grab bag (59 comments total)

We were the "Integrating Feynman" last year, I'm hoping AskMe can do better than that =)
posted by onalark at 8:20 AM on September 1, 2006

The Square Root Poopies?
posted by potch at 8:23 AM on September 1, 2006

Buckyballers
posted by MrMoonPie at 8:24 AM on September 1, 2006

the multipliers?
posted by lester's sock puppet at 8:24 AM on September 1, 2006

"Destroyer of worlds" as in "Now I am become death, the destroyer of worlds"

"Schrodinger's cats"
posted by MzB at 8:26 AM on September 1, 2006

The Magnus Force.
posted by dersins at 8:26 AM on September 1, 2006

the Slide Rules, but only if you're rough with your tackles
posted by sonofslim at 8:27 AM on September 1, 2006

^
posted by dersins at 8:27 AM on September 1, 2006

Ball lightning?

something squared?

we like math?

I've lost my mojo. I blame the cough syrup.
posted by SassHat at 8:30 AM on September 1, 2006

"Big O" or "Fast Fourier Transform"
posted by cowbellemoo at 8:33 AM on September 1, 2006 [1 favorite]

The Standard Deviants?
posted by COBRA! at 8:33 AM on September 1, 2006

"Occam's Razors" - probably not, but come on, "The Razors"!
"The Zero Dividers"
"Zero Points"
posted by blueneurosis at 8:34 AM on September 1, 2006

Mathletes?
posted by Lucinda at 8:37 AM on September 1, 2006 [1 favorite]

The No Talent Ass Clowns (Office Space)
posted by nineRED at 8:38 AM on September 1, 2006 [1 favorite]

The Improper Faction
posted by biffa at 8:38 AM on September 1, 2006

The Fluid Dynamics.
posted by transient at 8:39 AM on September 1, 2006

The Riemann-Zidane Functors

Karnaugh's Angriest Map
posted by kcm at 8:40 AM on September 1, 2006

"We = MC²"
posted by frenetic at 8:41 AM on September 1, 2006

"The Manifolds"
"Us > You"
posted by Iridic at 8:45 AM on September 1, 2006

Not physics related but: Kicks for Pricks.
posted by Falconetti at 8:45 AM on September 1, 2006

APAM Bombers
posted by MarvinJ at 8:46 AM on September 1, 2006

The Tits Group. OK, that might work better for a female team.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 8:49 AM on September 1, 2006

"Bandgap structures of photonic lattices/crystals, and we'll kick yr ass!"
posted by YoBananaBoy at 8:50 AM on September 1, 2006

The APAM Napalms
posted by the cuban at 8:54 AM on September 1, 2006

oooh, Standard Deviants is good.

pi division
ratio strife (say it out loud)
coed fixed-knee division (*cough*)
posted by whatnot at 9:04 AM on September 1, 2006

Applied Math
posted by crookedneighbor at 9:06 AM on September 1, 2006

Eleven Dimensions
posted by booksprite at 9:07 AM on September 1, 2006

The Stato-Mathochists.
posted by jamjam at 9:08 AM on September 1, 2006

The Pervy Lurking Variables
The Mobius Strippers
or The Mobius Stripsearchers
posted by iconomy at 9:26 AM on September 1, 2006

The Rod Units
posted by iconomy at 9:27 AM on September 1, 2006

The Vulgar Fractions
posted by booksprite at 9:30 AM on September 1, 2006

Or The Naked Singularities
posted by booksprite at 9:35 AM on September 1, 2006

The Ball Kickers. (Applying this name to applied math/physics is left as an exercise for the reader.)
posted by drew3d at 9:35 AM on September 1, 2006

The Anus Mirabilis
The Big Bangers
The Cube Root by Hand Jobs
posted by iconomy at 9:35 AM on September 1, 2006

The Unstable Quarks

(To make more offensive: The Unstable Quarks + GIANT PENISES!!).
posted by contessa at 9:46 AM on September 1, 2006

Mentripetal force

Alpha male decay

Up and Atom! (stolen from the simpsons)

Ohm Face
posted by clairezulkey at 9:49 AM on September 1, 2006

The Aftermath
The Mean Root Squares
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 9:53 AM on September 1, 2006

The Multiple Partners

Appolonius' Blown Gasket

The Acute Bridge of Asses (wiki)

The Horny Box Plotters

The Algorithm Method
posted by iconomy at 9:54 AM on September 1, 2006

Unified Field Hero's

Super-Thermo Dynamics

Absolute Zeros

Van Allen Belt Boys

The Quantum Mechanics
posted by French Fry at 9:56 AM on September 1, 2006

The Bisectuals
posted by chococat at 9:59 AM on September 1, 2006

Maxwell's Demons
posted by Quietgal at 10:00 AM on September 1, 2006

Quietgal almost got my fantasy football team's name ...
Maxwell's Equations ... though, I'm thinking Demons may have been a better choice now ...
posted by forforf at 10:02 AM on September 1, 2006

Dork Matter
posted by jamjam at 10:07 AM on September 1, 2006

Planck Walkers
The Fizzy Cysts
Big Banger Theory
Strange Quarks
Charmed Quarks
Quantum Leaper Lepers
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 10:20 AM on September 1, 2006

potentially crude, potentially offensive,

Suck our/my Matter

taken from the crude/funny boat name on the movie, The Great Outdoors--Suck My Wake.
posted by LoriFLA at 10:23 AM on September 1, 2006

The Complete Wankels?
posted by unSane at 10:28 AM on September 1, 2006

Erdös/Euler/Fibonacci Numbers (Each player can have his/her Erdos number on the back)
The Particle/Waves
The Magnetic Monopoles
Perpetual Motion
Hot Dark Matter


Minimax
Nash Equilibrium
The Nash Ramblers
Stag Hunt
Tit-For-Tat (again, better for the ladies)
(I like these because they're about game theory...)


(This could degenerate into roller derby math geekery pretty quickly, couldn't it)
posted by Philbo at 10:41 AM on September 1, 2006

I like "Buckyballers" best so far.

The Angle Grinders

The Compound Fracturers

Degenerates United

Deviants & Derivatives

The Dirty Digits

The Falling Bodies

The Gaussian Eliminators

Negatively Associated Data (The 'NADS for short)

Pi Eaters

The Pi Holes

The Circle Jerks

posted by mikepop at 10:45 AM on September 1, 2006

"Math Debators"

Say it out loud.
posted by nineRED at 10:52 AM on September 1, 2006 [1 favorite]

Oh, physics too.

Repulsive Force

Fluid Friction

The Diepoles

Flux U

The Massholes

posted by mikepop at 10:59 AM on September 1, 2006

The Dutch cOven?
posted by maxpower at 11:11 AM on September 1, 2006

Divide by Zero
posted by jmevius at 11:22 AM on September 1, 2006

The Poincaré Conjurors
posted by yeti at 12:59 PM on September 1, 2006

Math Debatorth might be better!

Herr π
High π
posted by MrMoonPie at 2:15 PM on September 1, 2006

Dribblers
nut&butt.net
The Weak Force
Morningside Depths
Smart, yes. Quick, no.
We Give Good Headers
posted by rob511 at 3:55 PM on September 1, 2006

Let us know if you end up choosing one of these?
posted by iconomy at 10:36 AM on September 2, 2006

I promise. I gotta run these ideas by the other guys and I was waiting until I had a sorta-final list.
posted by onalark at 1:13 PM on September 2, 2006

Ok, this one is late to the game, but I had one-more physics-related idea:

Large Hardon Colliders (LHC)

I think this would compete well with "Buckyballers" for best potential logo/tshirt design possibilities.

posted by mikepop at 8:59 AM on September 8, 2006

Boy are you all gonna hate me, we ended up with APAM United. Nobody has a sense of adventure these days :(
posted by onalark at 9:49 PM on September 27, 2006