Pry My Credit Card From My Cold, Cold, Hands.

August 25, 2006 6:40 AM

I'm afraid to stop carrying my credit card, and because it's so handy and available, it's getting me into more and more debt.

I'm trying to dig myself out of credit card debt. Conventional wisdom says I should stop carrying the dang thing with me. If it's not there, I can't use it.
If all I have is a debit card, I have to do some pretty good math in my head to make sure I can afford whatever it is that I'm buying.
No money equals not buying it.

The problem I'm having is the psychological fear of removing it from my wallet. I'm one of those "But what if there's an emergency?!" people.
In my head this could be my car breaking down, but that's not what gets me into trouble - it's the shiny things at Target and the books at Borders that are like a chinese water torture, adding to my balance each month.
Help me get over this fear, and throw my credit card out of my wallet once and for all and get me on my way to stopping the hemmorage of spending.

I need to wrap my brain around a different way of thinking. Rationalizations, mind hacks, personal anecdotes, long distance hypnosis, links, articles, anything and everything is welcome.

posted by willmize to shopping (38 comments total)

Stop making excuses.

Cut it up.

Now.
posted by milarepa at 6:42 AM on August 25, 2006

Why would you need your credit card if your car ran out of gas? It seems like you would need at most $20. Just keep an "emergency" $20 in your wallet at all times.
posted by delmoi at 6:45 AM on August 25, 2006

Not carrying it is the best idea. But if not, get a dozen rubber bands and wrap them around it. Make it a real hassle to free it. Or maybe a small envelope? But that would be to easy.
posted by sohcahtoa at 6:45 AM on August 25, 2006 [1 favorite]

Look, there are really few emergencies that you can't go home to get your card for if you need it. You don't have to pay for a broken down car repair on the spot. If you're fleeing the country you don't want to use your cards anyway. If you're truly worried why not code your number and put it into your wallet on a piece of paper. You can't use it to buy anything at Target like that, but you'll have it if you need to rent a car over the phone.
posted by OmieWise at 6:47 AM on August 25, 2006

I second the "just cut it up" sentiment. This is really a problem of willpower. Your account can and will continue to exist without the card. If you absolutely need it, you will be able to give the number over the phone or the internet to pay for things.

Cut it up, melt it with a lighter, sand off the magnetic strip.

Do you have a mobile phone? If so, cut the card up, now. If you happen to find yourself in some kind of emergency, you will be able to call a friend, family, or the police to bail you. No need for the card whatsoever.

As a point of reference, I moved to another country, and I haven't used my credit card (except to buy plane tickets) in over 8 months. I don't miss it (or the interest) one bit.
posted by fake at 6:48 AM on August 25, 2006

Maybe demagnetize it, then put it in a small envelope and pour wood glue around it?

Then you'll have it, but you'll have to go through a lot of work to scrape off all the glue and its number will need to be manually typed in. Seems like you'd have to be really motivated to us it.

Or get some will power.
posted by croutonsupafreak at 6:48 AM on August 25, 2006

Phone up the credit card company and have your limit reduced to something you find manageable, say, $500. Now you can't spend too much. Unless you get a bunch more cards...
posted by shepd at 6:51 AM on August 25, 2006 [1 favorite]

Assuming you have health insurance, the likelihood of an emergency that requires a credit card and not a debit card is near zero. I can't even think of what that would be, unless your checking account has almost no money in it.
posted by Prospero at 6:52 AM on August 25, 2006

By that I'm implying, yeah, go ahead and take the card out of your wallet.
posted by Prospero at 6:53 AM on August 25, 2006

Put a $20 bill in the glove compartment of your car, which should cover you for running out of gas, etc.

Personally, I prefer making the card extremely difficult to use rather than straight away cutting it up. My favorite approach is to put it in a small plastic cup, fill the cup with water, then place it in your freezer. If you really, absolutely, positively HAVE to use it in case of an emergency, you can thaw it out. But it's not going to be within easy reach for impulse buys.
posted by arco at 6:54 AM on August 25, 2006 [1 favorite]

I'm climbing out of credit card debt as we speak. Believe me, you want to STOP RIGHT NOW and quit spending on your card.

If you feel like you are in trouble with spending on it, then you're already way over your head. Cut it up and start putting the extra dough you'll save into a savings account so you can have money for an actual emergency.
posted by agregoli at 6:55 AM on August 25, 2006

One thing that can help with your Borders addiction: get a library card. Seriously, I used to buy so many books, that I ran out of space. Having a shelf full of great books was a point of pride, but I finally realized that most of those books would be read only once (if at all - hello William Gaddis!), and that getting books from the library freed up a lot of extra cash.

If your issue is that you like reading newly-published books, check with your library. My local lets you reserve new releases for one thin dollar, much less than the twenty-five a throw they'll get you for at Borders.
posted by baltimore at 6:56 AM on August 25, 2006

Remove the temptation: Stop going to Target and Borders for a month and see how it affects your balance. If you absolutely must browse in these stores, put your credit card in your car's glove box before you go inside. And park far enough away from the entrance that running back to get your card is too much of a pain.

Remember that the credit card does not magically buy things -- it's simply a cash substitute that postpones the bill. Watch your balance like a hawk each month; if it grows too rapidly, maybe it'll be enough of a wake-up call for you.
posted by phatkitten at 7:03 AM on August 25, 2006

Get an American Express card. It's equally handy yet slightly less accepted. (Being slightly less accepted means you don't get to use it as much, of course.)

The deal? You have to pay for it at the end of the month. It's not a credit card. It's a charge card.

You'll have the convenience you need and you won't get into debt (because if you don't pay it at the end of the month they disabled it).

Oh, and yeah, cut that other card up. Or call and get the limit lowered.
posted by smallerdemon at 7:07 AM on August 25, 2006

The real issue isn't the card - it's your spending habit. That won't change until you learn that there will always be more books and more shiny things. You can't buy them all, and if you could, you couldn't fit them in your house/apartment. There comes a time when you realize: I can never read all of those books; I can never hear all of that music; I can only drive one car at a time; I can only wear one outfit per day.
posted by clarkstonian at 7:09 AM on August 25, 2006 [3 favorites]

Swedish proverb: When you buy something you don't need, you steal from yourself.
posted by randomination at 7:10 AM on August 25, 2006 [3 favorites]

On the topic of fear, I read somewhere once words to teh effect that "you have handled everything (good and bad) that has ever happened. There is no reason why you cannot continue to do so."

I assume this means that if you were without a credit card, and some dire emergency occurred, you would be intelligent and inventive enough to deal with it, as you have dealt with everything else so far.

Go to your wallet now, take out that credit card, put it arco's plastic cup and freeze it. Tomorrow, you can change your mind if you like. But now, right now, is the perfect opportunity for you to make a decision and take an action that will help you to be happier and more secure.
posted by b33j at 7:11 AM on August 25, 2006

This is a story I pasted into another thread about willpower. My suggestion, if you really think you can't take the card out of your wallet, is to take last month's bank statement -- the one that says you're still $XYZZY in debt buying things from Target -- and wrap it around your card and secure it with rubber bands. This way every time you unwrap it to buy some more plastic crap, it will be a tangible reminder that this is A Bad Idea.

There is no such thing as the sort of emergency you are describing and worrying about. If you have AAA, they will allow you to pay with car disasters by check. If you need gas you can keep a $20 in the glove box. However, a real emergency is being strapped for cash when you're an adult person and there's something you'd like to buy that would really enrich your life and you can't do it because you piddled your credit away on junk you should have gotten at the library or avoided altogether. Tough love, tell yourself whatever story you need to to cut this out.
posted by jessamyn at 7:13 AM on August 25, 2006 [2 favorites]

It feels really good to get out of credit card debt. Much better than buying stuff at target or borders that you will just feel guilty about later. Stop spending and learn to enjoy watching your balance go down.
posted by Melsky at 7:19 AM on August 25, 2006

Put it in a glass of water and stick it in the freezer. That way, you can still use if for necessary purchases (like airline tickets, etc.) but you'll have to take it out and let it thaw first. it won't be so handy for little things at Target and the like. Those little things sure do add up.
I did this about 6 months ago and it's made a huge difference with my (previously poor) spending habits.
posted by emd3737 at 7:31 AM on August 25, 2006

Good solution -

Forget about credit cards. Buy everything with cash - physical paper money that passes from your hands into the hands of someone else. Don't tell me it's impossible: people bought plane tickets and cars and even paid their rent in cash. Small notes so you have to use a lot of them, or big notes that you hate to break - your choice. And DO NOT use the debit/ATM card for purchases: withdraw what you need from your ATM, keep the cash in your wallet, weep inside as the wad of cash gets smaller, and call it a day.

Kind of lame, enabling solution -

Take a really high resolution photo of the card, front and back. If your photo is on the card, that's even better. If you need the information on the card, you've got all the information right there. But you can't scan it and you'll have to explain to the cashier/towing guy/whoever that you've got a problem with the card burning a hole in your wallet so you've hacked this paper solution instead.

[rant]

It's not a "mind hack"; it's an "idea".

[/rant]

Best of luck!
posted by mdonley at 7:42 AM on August 25, 2006

If you are really worried about emergencies, consider that you should, if you are able, develop an actual emergency fund for emergencies. As someone living on the super cheap at the moment I know that's easier to say than do, but I had to throw it out there. However, I think that saying to yourself "But what if there's an emergency?!" is really just a justification - the devil on your shoulder getting the best of you.

My recommendation is to stop taking tours of pretty things you can't have. Don't shop as a leisure time activity. I love to shop for fun, or to relieve stress, and that's how I ended up with the same amount of debt (save a mortgage) as my 58 year old father. I'm 23.

When you feel compelled to shop, do something else that will bring you pleasure, and enrich your life more than just going after The Next Shiny Thing. Take up photography, join a sewing circle, start doing yoga, whatever. Just make sure any money you invest in your new hobby gets paid for with your debit card.

And when you are out of debt, you'll feel so incredibly happy you made the effort and did it. Seriously.
posted by Famous at 7:43 AM on August 25, 2006 [1 favorite]

If you absolutely, positively can't cut up the card, put it on autopay.

This is the system whereby the total balance on the card is automatically deducted from your account every month.

It's easy to set up, but a godawful, painful system if you've overspent, and get an "insufficient balance" notification from your bank on autopay day.

Instantly, the credit card company charges a fee, and puts the uncollected balance on its standard interest rate schedule. You go from owing zero percent to owing the balance, plus interest at 19% annual.

Resolving this situation means phonecalls to the credit card issuer, and a new form to fill out to get back on autopay, because it's automatically cancelled when the insufficient funds notice comes back from the bank.

Believe me, I know from experience. After one or two cancelled autopays, I always keep a thou or two in excess at the bank from which the credit card funds are withdrawn.
posted by Gordion Knott at 7:46 AM on August 25, 2006

Can you leave the house without the card just once? Try it today. See if you make it through the day. There may be cold sweats and palpitations involved, possibly a fainting spell, but stick it out. Have a nice cup of tea to calm yourself, and pay cash for it.

Tomorrow you'll think "huh! I lived through it!" Try it again, just for the day. Keep it up. You know it's at home if you need it. Eventually it will get to be a habit.

It's one thing if you're travelling--it's easy to justify having a credit card along then. But if you are in your home city, the likelihood that you'll get into a situation that you can only extricate yourself from if you have your credit card on your person is, well, vanishingly small. The "emergency" excuse is flimsy, and you should guilt-trip yourself every time you trot it out.
posted by adamrice at 8:06 AM on August 25, 2006 [1 favorite]

Cut up the credit card and substitute it with a debit card. Then you can buy all you want without increasing your debt - until you run out of money. Then you'll be more careful the following month!
posted by kdern at 8:14 AM on August 25, 2006

I second the idea of getting the limit lowered. If you can't do that, stick the credit card in a space that's even more inconvenient than your glove box, like a box in your trunk. That's how my mom stopped smoking - every time she went for a cigarette, somewhere along in the process she thought, "This is so stupid of me," and she'd stop. Shopping is an addiction too, so maybe this would work for you.
posted by christinetheslp at 8:22 AM on August 25, 2006

Famous is 100% right. Don't go into Target or Borders unless you *need* something from within. And even then, don't browse. Go for what you need and get out. Though, honestly? Is there anything that you *need* from either place?

I was a huge browser of these and other stores after my big break up almost two years ago. Even though I was in fairly good shape financially, considering I was paying rent, a mortgage and half of "our" household bills I found myself hurting a bit when I realized that I'd run up some credit card debt getting set up in my new place. It's truly amazing how much you can spend in Target when you're not paying attention.

It really did take going cold turkey with the Target addiction to stop that behavior. And for what it's worth... I carry my high limit card with me at all times and I don't ever put anything on it that isn't directly related to travel for my company (100% reimbursed) or an Internet purchase. Wow, does it feel good to be *that* in control.
posted by FlamingBore at 8:24 AM on August 25, 2006

I think, and I'm not positive, that it is still possible to get an ATM card that does not have debit/credit capabilities attached to it. It probably depends on the bank, but that would make mdonley's suggestion of using only cash much easier. And yes, it is totally possible - I have a good friend who only just got his first credit card, and it was only so that he could establish credit in order to qualify for a mortgage to buy a house.
posted by echo0720 at 8:27 AM on August 25, 2006

Many good ideas. I endorse the idea of putting the card in a glass of water and then putting that into the freezer, so that you have to wait for it to thaw out before using it. And the $20 bill kept in the car makes sense. I also recommend the book Your Money or Your Life, by Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin. It helps you make the lifestyle change you want.
posted by LeisureGuy at 8:39 AM on August 25, 2006

This SNL skit, while a joke, does address your very question.
posted by O9scar at 8:47 AM on August 25, 2006

You probably shouldn't have your credit limits reduced, especially if you're carrying large balances. Doing so will raise your debt-to-available-credit ratio, which is bad for your FICO score. If you plan to buy a house or car in the forseeable future that will cost you.

I put my cards in the freezer like a few people have suggested and it has saved me so. much. money. I only carry my debit card, and I have my savings automatically transferred to another account so I can't spend money that's earmarked for something else ("well, I'm supposed to save that $300 for a down payment on a house, but that J. Crew sale is so good. I'll just save more next month"

You will be absolutely, positively, 100% fine without a credit card during your day-to-day life. And stay out of the stores that tempt you. Just do it, and you won't start obsessing over whatever you saw that you don't have the money to buy.
posted by robinpME at 9:01 AM on August 25, 2006

Why not make your book addiction work for you? Get a job reviewing books. Check with your local alternative newsweekly, online pubs, etc. You'll then get free books (you can often request the ones you want to review) AND you'll get paid for it. If you're really thrifty you can then sell the books to a used book store for more cash or trade them in for more books. All without spending any money.
posted by Atom12 at 9:07 AM on August 25, 2006

I've seen the suggestion about freezing the card in a block of ice and leaving it in the freezer. When it comes down to an emergency, it's possible to retrieve the card, but it's going to take a while. It'll help stop impulse purchases.
posted by jeversol at 9:36 AM on August 25, 2006

First, I wanted to thank everyone for the thoughtful and varied answers. Most of them hit a nerve of some sort.
Second, I've done some thinking and taken some concrete actions that I wanted to share, in case someone from the future comes across this thread and wants to know the outcome.

The credit card is out of my wallet.
In a locked file cabinet.
With a recent statement wrapped around it, with total amount owed highlighted for emphasis.
And shame.
I moved $100 from a separate interest bearing savings account to a savings account that is tied to my debit card to cover any 'emergencies'.
While I doubt I will ever need this money, just the fact that it is there goes a long way toward aleviating my fear.
Library card has replaced credit card in wallet.
Mmmmm. Books. For free!

Again, thanks for your time.
posted by willmize at 10:28 AM on August 25, 2006 [1 favorite]

Just want to emphasize that actual emergencies tend to require cash (e.g. a taxi from a city to home, bribery, doing anything during power outs), so it's better to have accessible cash than it is to have that card, which will only really help for emergency car rentals and hotel stays. If it were me, I'd cover the thing in duct tape but keep it in my wallet (having done the emergency hotel room thing during a hurricane).
posted by xo at 10:35 AM on August 25, 2006

I have to back up the freezing technique - we were using a card to pay most of our wedding expenses, but after it was done, we had a card that we used for $20 here, $30 there, but we still needed for some other incremental expenses.

So we froze it, and it totally worked. It just forced us to make planned purchases and not use it for day to day shit.
posted by mckenney at 10:36 AM on August 25, 2006

Just do it, and you won't start obsessing over whatever you saw that you don't have the money to buy.

I wanted to make another point on the browsing. The other thing that I did that *really* helped and I forgot until I read that comment about obsessing was that I also stopped looking through the ads in the Sunday paper. If I didn't see that Target was having a sale on X Y or Z, well I wasn't tempted to go.

And, just recently I took my consumer lust down another peg and unsubscribed from the RSS feeds for all of the deal sites and Gizmodo.

Then again, I'm preparing to be un (or) under employed very soon. You might not need to go that far.
posted by FlamingBore at 10:44 AM on August 25, 2006

You might want to ease up on the shame, given that we live in a culture that seriously promotes and rewards consumption, and give yourself credit for recognizing the problem and dealing with it. Congratulations to you and to the excellent AskMe posters.
posted by theora55 at 9:56 PM on August 25, 2006