How to become less emotionally dependent?
August 20, 2006 10:36 PM Subscribe
How can I learn to become less emotionally dependent on others and generally learn to love myself? (details..)
posted by thewhitenoise to health & fitness (11 answers total) 8 users marked this as a favorite
It's recently occured to me that I have some serious emotional dependency issues. I believe they have a lot to do with some sort of hidden self-esteem problems and a general sense of inferiority. I've been trying to work these things out for quite some time, but am missing a large piece of the puzzle.
I was heavily involved with a friend, emotionally, at the beginning of this year. We spent a lot of time together on the weekends, talked constantly throughout the week, and generally cared greatly for each other. I got very dependent on her emotionally, and when our brief fling ended, I flew into a self-destructive rage, followed by a heavy depression.
This was almost six months ago, and I'm still not "over" it, to which I attribute to the dependency. My self-esteem took a hit and for the longest time all I could do was wait for a friend to call/IM/email me to make me feel better.
What I'm looking for are some ideas on how to get past the emotional dependency and genuinely learn to love myself. Therapy's not helping much (I think there's a lot I've got to discover on my own), the only literature I've been able to find on the issue of dependency has to do with substance abuse (not what I need), and I haven't figured out how to be happy with and by myself.
I'd like to reach the point where I can be happy without constant social interaction - where I can just enjoy being with myself. Self-love, in the non-sexual sense, would be ideal.
Maybe there's some literature I haven't discovered or some healthy habits I can get into that the hive mind could suggest. Really, anything you can suggest on the subject would be greatly appreciated.