Help me help my grandparents help my mother
August 9, 2006 7:15 PM Subscribe
Six months ago, my 50-year-old mother had a serious stroke, and the nursing home that she's in now considers her recovered enough to move on to an assisted living or daily home health care situation. I'm trying to help my 75-year-old grandparents figure out what to do.
posted by cilantro to health & fitness (6 answers total)
My mother and I are permanently estranged, and I'm not in a situation to help financially, so I want to at least do what I can to help the grandparents who raised me to find a place for her. Right now, they think their only option is to take care of her at home, but I know and I think they know that it won't work. The drug and alcohol addiction that indirectly led to her stroke is still evident, she begs for additional pain medication (loritabs) and threw a tantrum when a nurse mentioned that the doctor was probably going to start cutting back on the dosage. She is still seriously impaired in her speech and motor skills and requires physical help that my grandparents won't be able to provide for any real length of time, in spite of the fact that they are very healthy and active. From what I've read, Medicaid doesn't cover home health care or assisted living in Tennessee or Kentucky (they live about ten miles on the TN side from the border of those states). Where on earth do we start looking for ways to find this kind of care in other states, preferably states that aren't too far away? Is it even possible to move someone into another state for the sole purpose of taking advantage of their health care services? I've poked around on Google and it's hard to find anything that clearly explains the issues surrounding this. Information, links to information, and general ideas or advice from anyone with any experience with these issues will be greatly appreciated.