Dealing with my racist grandma.
August 4, 2006 7:21 AM Subscribe
Looking for advice on dealing with my racist grandmother.
posted by brevator to human relations (35 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
My grandmother found out that my brother is dating a Korean woman. She refused to hug him and walked out of the house. My mother told her to grow up.
She's dealt with my uncle marrying a non-Jew, but they live on the other side of the country now. She seems allright with me dating a non-Jew, but I suspect it would get rough if we got engaged.
I thought this would cool down after a while, but it's been three weeks and no progress. She says "I always wondered what I'd die of and now I know- a broken heart." She also refers to my brother's girlfriend as a "Chinamen" (not to her face, thank god, they haven't met) and says "They all look the same." It's like she's been reading the 1975 edition of "Bigot's Best Quotes."
My grandmother is not an easy woman to deal with and my mother is perfectly fine with leaving her out of family stuff until she can act more maturely. I'd be okay with this strategy except that she's an 89 year old widow with no friends (her only friend was dumped after she told my grandmother that no one at the mahjong club liked her), and will probably die without a social network. Despite all this bullshit, I do love my grandmother and would rather her not die ostracized and alone.
Anyone been through something like this? Any practical advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.