What makes a workplace good for parents/caretakers/families?
June 25, 2022 8:20 AM Subscribe
I read a lot of articles/stories about how unforgiving work is towards parents, caretakers and families. I agree with all of it. I don't see though articles on what would make a place a good place for parents and caretakers to work (that isn't just a fluff piece intended to make a business look good).
I think most people agree that paid time-off is an important piece of this, and I totally agree. But that is time *away* from work, and typically it is matched with otherwise unforgiving and unmanageable expectations while working. So I am looking for more when workers are "on the clock", what makes a place workable for parents, families and caretakers. This can be pre-pandemic or post-pandemic, and remote or in-person.
I think most people agree that paid time-off is an important piece of this, and I totally agree. But that is time *away* from work, and typically it is matched with otherwise unforgiving and unmanageable expectations while working. So I am looking for more when workers are "on the clock", what makes a place workable for parents, families and caretakers. This can be pre-pandemic or post-pandemic, and remote or in-person.
I've been a caretaker to an adult family member. What's helped me most is flexibility about hours - e.g. during a crisis in the family member's health I didn't necessarily need or want to take time OFF but I did need it to be cool that I might be at the hospital during much of the working day not taking calls, but catching up on things at night or over the weekend. On a related note it's been very helpful to have management that does not expect everyone to work 120% at all times but understands that we all have personal lives and outside things going on with us and there will be times we can give more or less to our workplace, and considers it to be normal and reasonable if I have a week or month where I'm not at the top of my game.
Over the pandemic my workplace added a service that will help find and screen care providers, and while I haven't needed it yet, I was so pleased to see that it very explicitly includes options for help finding both ongoing and temporary care for adult family members, not only kids. In general my workplace has gotten a lot more thoughtful and intentional in recent years about ensuring their talk about supporting family is not only supporting parents of small children, and I absolutely notice and appreciate the culture that they are promoting.
Another thought is privacy to handle e.g. calls to providers that have to happen during the workday. I'm fortunate to have an office but have in the past worked in a cube situation where someone nearby was spending a lot of time on the phone dealing with family caretaking situations. She often sounded pretty distressed and if I were her I think I'd really have wished for some ability to handle things in private, even if that had just been a conference room. (There was only one conference room in that building and it was constantly booked; I don't really know what she could have done other than make her calls from stairwells or the front steps, neither of which would have been a noticeable improvement.)
posted by Stacey at 8:39 AM on June 25, 2022 [12 favorites]
Over the pandemic my workplace added a service that will help find and screen care providers, and while I haven't needed it yet, I was so pleased to see that it very explicitly includes options for help finding both ongoing and temporary care for adult family members, not only kids. In general my workplace has gotten a lot more thoughtful and intentional in recent years about ensuring their talk about supporting family is not only supporting parents of small children, and I absolutely notice and appreciate the culture that they are promoting.
Another thought is privacy to handle e.g. calls to providers that have to happen during the workday. I'm fortunate to have an office but have in the past worked in a cube situation where someone nearby was spending a lot of time on the phone dealing with family caretaking situations. She often sounded pretty distressed and if I were her I think I'd really have wished for some ability to handle things in private, even if that had just been a conference room. (There was only one conference room in that building and it was constantly booked; I don't really know what she could have done other than make her calls from stairwells or the front steps, neither of which would have been a noticeable improvement.)
posted by Stacey at 8:39 AM on June 25, 2022 [12 favorites]
Flexible scheduling to accommodate things like taking kids to and from school and daycare and doctor's appointments and whatnot.
Heavily-subsidized health insurance for dependents and workers alike.
Options to work remotely when it's viable.
A private, comfortable place for breastfeeding people to pump.
Break rooms that are well-equipped for bringing food from home (big fridge, microwave, toaster oven, etc.)
Workplaces where more than one person knows how to do all the job duties.
A culture of work-life balance, where no one is expected to e.g. respond to emails in the middle of the night.
(Kind of an aside, but I think most of these are universal design kinds of things--when you make a workplace better for caregivers (or neurodiverse people, or women, or BIPOC, or sexual minorities, or etc.), you wind up making it better for everyone.)
posted by box at 8:47 AM on June 25, 2022 [10 favorites]
Heavily-subsidized health insurance for dependents and workers alike.
Options to work remotely when it's viable.
A private, comfortable place for breastfeeding people to pump.
Break rooms that are well-equipped for bringing food from home (big fridge, microwave, toaster oven, etc.)
Workplaces where more than one person knows how to do all the job duties.
A culture of work-life balance, where no one is expected to e.g. respond to emails in the middle of the night.
(Kind of an aside, but I think most of these are universal design kinds of things--when you make a workplace better for caregivers (or neurodiverse people, or women, or BIPOC, or sexual minorities, or etc.), you wind up making it better for everyone.)
posted by box at 8:47 AM on June 25, 2022 [10 favorites]
On-site daycare!
posted by mareli at 8:54 AM on June 25, 2022 [5 favorites]
posted by mareli at 8:54 AM on June 25, 2022 [5 favorites]
People are talking about flexible scheduling but another vital thing is predictable scheduling, which some places have been putting into law:
https://www.shrm.org/resourcesandtools/legal-and-compliance/state-and-local-updates/pages/predictable-scheduling-laws.aspx
https://www.brookings.edu/blog/up-front/2020/08/18/unpredictable-work-hours-and-volatile-incomes-are-long-term-risks-for-american-workers/
Basically, computers and communication advances have allowed employers to start doing something called "just in time" scheduling. If you are taking care of others and need to arrange care for them while you are at work, not knowing in advance when you'll need that care makes things so much harder.
posted by foxfirefey at 9:25 AM on June 25, 2022 [8 favorites]
https://www.shrm.org/resourcesandtools/legal-and-compliance/state-and-local-updates/pages/predictable-scheduling-laws.aspx
https://www.brookings.edu/blog/up-front/2020/08/18/unpredictable-work-hours-and-volatile-incomes-are-long-term-risks-for-american-workers/
Basically, computers and communication advances have allowed employers to start doing something called "just in time" scheduling. If you are taking care of others and need to arrange care for them while you are at work, not knowing in advance when you'll need that care makes things so much harder.
posted by foxfirefey at 9:25 AM on June 25, 2022 [8 favorites]
I worked with HR for the International Rescue Committee for a while - and we regularly heard from new employees that we had one of the most parent and caregiver-friendly benefits package anyone had ever seen.
Among the things that we offered -
* A private place for nursing mothers to pump. We actually had a couple such places, and were pretty diligent about enforcing this (i.e., if some yutz stepped in there to make a private phone call we'd go in and kick him out if a nursing mother needed to get in).
* Flexibility for parents who had to do things with day care/school appointments.
* A generous PATERNITY leave package, on top of the generous maternity leave package. What we offered for paternity leave was what most other companies offer for maternity leave, and our maternity leave was double that.
* I think we also did something where in addition to sick days and personal days, we also had some days where it was "I'm not sick but my kid/elderly parent is and I need to handle that".
* HR being super, super protective of people using their vacation time. Honestly, every other job I'd had up to that point, you got some subtle whining and grumbling if you used your vacation time because "oh it's gonna just be haaaaaaaard to do things without you", but with the IRC it was more like "yo, we're doing some serious brain-taxing shit here and people need to recharge, use your damn vacation time." It was more of a subtextual culture thing, but it really made a difference.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:32 AM on June 25, 2022 [6 favorites]
Among the things that we offered -
* A private place for nursing mothers to pump. We actually had a couple such places, and were pretty diligent about enforcing this (i.e., if some yutz stepped in there to make a private phone call we'd go in and kick him out if a nursing mother needed to get in).
* Flexibility for parents who had to do things with day care/school appointments.
* A generous PATERNITY leave package, on top of the generous maternity leave package. What we offered for paternity leave was what most other companies offer for maternity leave, and our maternity leave was double that.
* I think we also did something where in addition to sick days and personal days, we also had some days where it was "I'm not sick but my kid/elderly parent is and I need to handle that".
* HR being super, super protective of people using their vacation time. Honestly, every other job I'd had up to that point, you got some subtle whining and grumbling if you used your vacation time because "oh it's gonna just be haaaaaaaard to do things without you", but with the IRC it was more like "yo, we're doing some serious brain-taxing shit here and people need to recharge, use your damn vacation time." It was more of a subtextual culture thing, but it really made a difference.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:32 AM on June 25, 2022 [6 favorites]
You may want to look up Dan Price, who has made it a mission to provide a great workplace
posted by Enid Lareg at 9:44 AM on June 25, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by Enid Lareg at 9:44 AM on June 25, 2022 [1 favorite]
I think my employer does a pretty good job. Generous maternal/paternal leave, flexibility around family appointments, emergencies, etc. We didn't enforce using vacation time all that well pre-pandemic, but when everyone was working at home we suddenly noticed no one was taking vacation time and management started actively encouraging people to do so. No one (at least in my division) is expected to regularly work beyond their scheduled hours, though no one is discouraged from doing so!
This past winter we were hit with a cyberattack that shut down our systems for over a month. Some people were working huge amounts of overtime, many others weren't able to work at all, and there was no cutback in pay, no talk of layoffs or expectations to make up the time in any way.
Overall, this has been a company that makes good on the old saw that "people are our most important resource." In nearly 40 years in business we've never had layoffs, though of course if things got really bad that could change. Not all of our policies regarding long-term working from home, dress code, etc. are popular, and we certainly lost people when it became clear we'd have to return to the office (though WFH worked really well for us). But overall it's a great place to work, if you have to work.
posted by lhauser at 10:12 AM on June 25, 2022
This past winter we were hit with a cyberattack that shut down our systems for over a month. Some people were working huge amounts of overtime, many others weren't able to work at all, and there was no cutback in pay, no talk of layoffs or expectations to make up the time in any way.
Overall, this has been a company that makes good on the old saw that "people are our most important resource." In nearly 40 years in business we've never had layoffs, though of course if things got really bad that could change. Not all of our policies regarding long-term working from home, dress code, etc. are popular, and we certainly lost people when it became clear we'd have to return to the office (though WFH worked really well for us). But overall it's a great place to work, if you have to work.
posted by lhauser at 10:12 AM on June 25, 2022
Just adding on the above:
Pay people right. Caregiving is expensive no matter who needs care. Cold hard cash helped me over company swag catalogues, etc.
Compassionate managers. My best bosses have known that pregnancy and parenting involve times of crisis and they haven’t seen me as “less than” because I had to miss a major presentation as my child was in emergency surgery. That said they also insisted on documentation, updates, and my ensuring someone was in the loop and could step in if a crisis came. Also they made processes that left time for snafus where they could.
See the long term. A sleep deprived new parent may have a drop in productivity (esp in countries without good leave)- and you can’t just have that fall on the next person. But that person may also, in a year, be incredibly stable and a “workhorse.” People are not just that week’s goals.
posted by warriorqueen at 11:40 AM on June 25, 2022 [3 favorites]
Pay people right. Caregiving is expensive no matter who needs care. Cold hard cash helped me over company swag catalogues, etc.
Compassionate managers. My best bosses have known that pregnancy and parenting involve times of crisis and they haven’t seen me as “less than” because I had to miss a major presentation as my child was in emergency surgery. That said they also insisted on documentation, updates, and my ensuring someone was in the loop and could step in if a crisis came. Also they made processes that left time for snafus where they could.
See the long term. A sleep deprived new parent may have a drop in productivity (esp in countries without good leave)- and you can’t just have that fall on the next person. But that person may also, in a year, be incredibly stable and a “workhorse.” People are not just that week’s goals.
posted by warriorqueen at 11:40 AM on June 25, 2022 [3 favorites]
Flexibility. I took a week off, used 1/2 sick time, 1/2 remote work., to take care of my Mom. Got side-eye but but no more from my then boss.
posted by theora55 at 12:32 PM on June 25, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by theora55 at 12:32 PM on June 25, 2022 [1 favorite]
Women's Magazine specializes in answering this very question- they rank big companies on being family friendly and what makes a difference and how you and your company cam do better. There are several parts: policy, company culture, expectations of individuals.
posted by mutt.cyberspace at 7:38 PM on June 25, 2022
posted by mutt.cyberspace at 7:38 PM on June 25, 2022
I agree with all the above. Openness to part-time work arrangements and things like job-sharing can also help with this.
In my experience, however, one thing that can undermine the whole enterprise is a culture where flexibility and compassion are doled out only to certain employees depending on management's assessment of their particular situation, e.g. if working from home is an option only for people with kids, etc.. It's even worse if those without "legitimate needs" are routinely expected to pick up extra work, readjust schedules at the last minute to the detriment of their own lives, and otherwise take up all the slack for the flexibility that is given to others. I've seen that cause extreme resentment and ultimately, the departure of the "flexible" employees, which then means that the system stops working for everyone.
The only solution is a realistic assessment of what reasonable workloads for everyone are, and then taking into account the fact that life means that nobody will be at 100 percent all the time, and that everybody will be below it at some time. In my organization, I try to stick hard to priorities and assign workloads so that we are all running at no more than 80 percent of our maximum on a routine basis. And--and this is key--I staff accordingly, so that we have roughly five positions for every four that would be there in a bare-bones structure. That means we all have capacity to deal with real emergencies and everybody can normally take a last-minute day off without derailing their own work or anybody else's.
Tl: dr: management that recognizes all employees have human needs and factors this fact into staffing and planning makes for a much better workplace for all.
posted by rpfields at 9:01 AM on June 26, 2022
In my experience, however, one thing that can undermine the whole enterprise is a culture where flexibility and compassion are doled out only to certain employees depending on management's assessment of their particular situation, e.g. if working from home is an option only for people with kids, etc.. It's even worse if those without "legitimate needs" are routinely expected to pick up extra work, readjust schedules at the last minute to the detriment of their own lives, and otherwise take up all the slack for the flexibility that is given to others. I've seen that cause extreme resentment and ultimately, the departure of the "flexible" employees, which then means that the system stops working for everyone.
The only solution is a realistic assessment of what reasonable workloads for everyone are, and then taking into account the fact that life means that nobody will be at 100 percent all the time, and that everybody will be below it at some time. In my organization, I try to stick hard to priorities and assign workloads so that we are all running at no more than 80 percent of our maximum on a routine basis. And--and this is key--I staff accordingly, so that we have roughly five positions for every four that would be there in a bare-bones structure. That means we all have capacity to deal with real emergencies and everybody can normally take a last-minute day off without derailing their own work or anybody else's.
Tl: dr: management that recognizes all employees have human needs and factors this fact into staffing and planning makes for a much better workplace for all.
posted by rpfields at 9:01 AM on June 26, 2022
My company offers six weeks of what I call ”humanity leave” annually as well as unlimited PTO. We’re a women’s healthcare provider.
posted by bendy at 7:37 PM on June 26, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by bendy at 7:37 PM on June 26, 2022 [1 favorite]
Piling on to the above... I would say my current employer (technical role with a major financial service) is a good place to work. On the corporate level:
- we currently have the option of remote, in-office or hybrid
- I have enough PTO that I don't generally have to worry about having time when I need it.
- COVID policy was enacted quickly and has been consistent
- emergency child care is available
But really, that just sets the table. It's my direct chain of management that make me feel that this is where I plan to retire from. They:
- strongly push keeping skills updated via a learning day every 2 weeks
- genuinely care about not just me but my family's state
- are flexible in allowing for planned or unplanned need to step away
We had a family emergency in December. In talking to a provider, they asked if I could be in Boston within 2 hours. We live an hour away. I said yep, no problem. They confirmed do you need to check with your employer? I said "no, I know without asking that they have my back on this and if this is what is needed, then I am 100% supported in taking the time needed to do it."
posted by neilbert at 8:22 PM on June 26, 2022
- we currently have the option of remote, in-office or hybrid
- I have enough PTO that I don't generally have to worry about having time when I need it.
- COVID policy was enacted quickly and has been consistent
- emergency child care is available
But really, that just sets the table. It's my direct chain of management that make me feel that this is where I plan to retire from. They:
- strongly push keeping skills updated via a learning day every 2 weeks
- genuinely care about not just me but my family's state
- are flexible in allowing for planned or unplanned need to step away
We had a family emergency in December. In talking to a provider, they asked if I could be in Boston within 2 hours. We live an hour away. I said yep, no problem. They confirmed do you need to check with your employer? I said "no, I know without asking that they have my back on this and if this is what is needed, then I am 100% supported in taking the time needed to do it."
posted by neilbert at 8:22 PM on June 26, 2022
This thread is closed to new comments.
- jobs where you're replaceable - where the work can get done by any of several people and workers can and do pick up each other's work with ease, so that if you need to step away for a while nothing terrible happens
- jobs with realistic, stable-but-flexible timelines and deadlines (and where the workers have influence on and can push back on deadlines), so that you can manage your time and energy for yourself
And I disagree with you about PTO - the amount of PTO I've had in various jobs/careers and the the amount of pressure I've faced during my working hours doesn't seem to be correlated in any particular way (positively or negatively). I've never had a high pressure job with great PTO but I've certainly had low-pressure jobs with good PTO and high pressure jobs with terrible PTO (and yes, some low-pressure jobs with no/negligible PTO).
posted by mskyle at 8:36 AM on June 25, 2022 [1 favorite]