Making transition to new therapist as painless as possible?
March 1, 2021 2:55 PM Subscribe
My therapist is retiring, or moving on from being a therapist. I got an email from her about this and my last appointment with her will probably be next week. I am mostly okay with this, though somewhat apprehensive. Mostly I'm trying to think of what I have NOT thought about. If this happened to you, what would you have liked to know going into it? What would have helped?
I've been seeing her for my generalized anxiety for about five years. She's the only therapist I've seen as an adult. I am a woman in my 50s with a decent support network. I liked her a lot, felt she was useful, and would like to stay in therapy.
Things I know I need to think about:
- Getting a new therapist and one on my insurance
- I may have to stay within the same smallish practice because my prescribing psychiatrist is with this group and can only prescribe my meds if I am seeing someone in the practice (I think? It's a community mental health place, I'll make sure I am certain on this. I mostly have as-needed meds for now, am not against getting on more regular medication at some point)
- What my crisis plan is if something happens before I find a new therapist, though I am not generally someone who is in crisis.
- How to evaluate another therapist or how to manage if the first one I try I do not like much. I can be a real "pleaser" type and am concerned I might stick with a therapist I didn't like.
I feel like there is a type of therapist I am looking for--older than me, no cishet men, no "tough love" types--but other than that I am not sure. I'm in a fairly rural area so I don't have a lot of options but would like to make some good choices. I do know how to FIND a therapist, so this question is not about that. I liked my therapist a lot as I said; her approach which was sort of mindfulness mixed with DBT-ish practice worked for me but I could see other approaches working well too.
I've been seeing her for my generalized anxiety for about five years. She's the only therapist I've seen as an adult. I am a woman in my 50s with a decent support network. I liked her a lot, felt she was useful, and would like to stay in therapy.
Things I know I need to think about:
- Getting a new therapist and one on my insurance
- I may have to stay within the same smallish practice because my prescribing psychiatrist is with this group and can only prescribe my meds if I am seeing someone in the practice (I think? It's a community mental health place, I'll make sure I am certain on this. I mostly have as-needed meds for now, am not against getting on more regular medication at some point)
- What my crisis plan is if something happens before I find a new therapist, though I am not generally someone who is in crisis.
- How to evaluate another therapist or how to manage if the first one I try I do not like much. I can be a real "pleaser" type and am concerned I might stick with a therapist I didn't like.
I feel like there is a type of therapist I am looking for--older than me, no cishet men, no "tough love" types--but other than that I am not sure. I'm in a fairly rural area so I don't have a lot of options but would like to make some good choices. I do know how to FIND a therapist, so this question is not about that. I liked my therapist a lot as I said; her approach which was sort of mindfulness mixed with DBT-ish practice worked for me but I could see other approaches working well too.
Hello from another anxious person. Consider that this news is really stressful, unexpected, and unwelcome. In other words: a massive anxiety trigger. If I could give myself advice for a moment like that, it would be to remember that my anxiety is a lens that distorts what is in front of me, making me think I need to consider every potential mistake, research it to death, and make exactly the right choice—or else there will be terrible consequences. In reality, there are very few terrible unforeseen consequences. Predictable consequences, sure, but bad things happening because I didn’t ruminate enough? No.
Talk to your therapist about others within the practice who might be a good fit, as well as search terms to help you find someone. When you meet with someone new, give yourself a couple sessions to see how you feel, unless it’s a definite no. You don’t need to worry about wasting their time or making a decision right away. Remember that therapists meet with lots of folks who don’t continue seeing them. (If your area has relatively few potential matches, think about casting a wider net and doing telehealth long-term.)
posted by theotherdurassister at 9:23 PM on March 1, 2021 [2 favorites]
Talk to your therapist about others within the practice who might be a good fit, as well as search terms to help you find someone. When you meet with someone new, give yourself a couple sessions to see how you feel, unless it’s a definite no. You don’t need to worry about wasting their time or making a decision right away. Remember that therapists meet with lots of folks who don’t continue seeing them. (If your area has relatively few potential matches, think about casting a wider net and doing telehealth long-term.)
posted by theotherdurassister at 9:23 PM on March 1, 2021 [2 favorites]
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posted by showbiz_liz at 4:00 PM on March 1, 2021 [2 favorites]