Transferring some home videos for someone and found a sex tape
October 22, 2020 8:57 AM Subscribe
I was hired to transfer some VHS tapes for someone and amongst the many tapes are a few that are homemade sex tapes and I'm not sure what to do about that.
A few years ago, I transferred some home videos from VHS to DVD for my parents. My wife's family asked me to do the same for them last year and I did. I figured that since I had bought the right equipment and knew how to do it, I'd post an ad online offering to transfer other people's home videos for a small fee. No one really replied to the ad for several months. Last week, someone brought me about 50 tapes to transfer for their parents's wedding anniversary in early 2021. I quote him a price for the set and he hires me.
I noticed that some of the tapes have television shows recorded after the family videos end. I send a message asking if he wants me to cut those tv shows out or keep them in. He says to just keep them in and don't worry about doing any editing because some of the stuff on the tapes might be personal and he'd prefer me to not really be looking at them. No problem, I tell him that I'm just doing some quick checks for video and audio quality and that's it. He seems fine with that.
Here's the problem I'm having: Two of the tapes appear to be homemade sex tapes from when the guy (or maybe his brother? cousin?) was in college. I have no idea what to do with this. I have no idea if I should mention it or refuse to copy those tapes or what. I have no idea what words to use to bring this up with the guy. On one tape, it's about half of the tape and the other tape, it's closer to 90%. I have no idea how to bring this up without it coming across as that I was looking at his tapes. The whole things just seems so uncomfortable that I feel lost as to how to navigate this.
Probably compounding this is that I have aspergers and social situations are already a bit tricky sometimes.
Can anyone help?
A few years ago, I transferred some home videos from VHS to DVD for my parents. My wife's family asked me to do the same for them last year and I did. I figured that since I had bought the right equipment and knew how to do it, I'd post an ad online offering to transfer other people's home videos for a small fee. No one really replied to the ad for several months. Last week, someone brought me about 50 tapes to transfer for their parents's wedding anniversary in early 2021. I quote him a price for the set and he hires me.
I noticed that some of the tapes have television shows recorded after the family videos end. I send a message asking if he wants me to cut those tv shows out or keep them in. He says to just keep them in and don't worry about doing any editing because some of the stuff on the tapes might be personal and he'd prefer me to not really be looking at them. No problem, I tell him that I'm just doing some quick checks for video and audio quality and that's it. He seems fine with that.
Here's the problem I'm having: Two of the tapes appear to be homemade sex tapes from when the guy (or maybe his brother? cousin?) was in college. I have no idea what to do with this. I have no idea if I should mention it or refuse to copy those tapes or what. I have no idea what words to use to bring this up with the guy. On one tape, it's about half of the tape and the other tape, it's closer to 90%. I have no idea how to bring this up without it coming across as that I was looking at his tapes. The whole things just seems so uncomfortable that I feel lost as to how to navigate this.
Probably compounding this is that I have aspergers and social situations are already a bit tricky sometimes.
Can anyone help?
He's said that "some of the stuff on the tapes might be personal". I suspect that THIS is what he meant when he said that. He's already told you what to do about it - don't watch, just copy the rest of the stuff you were supposed to copy and be done with it.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:03 AM on October 22, 2020 [53 favorites]
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:03 AM on October 22, 2020 [53 favorites]
Unless your ad says you won’t, or you have good reason to believe there is something illegal on the tapes, I think you should transfer as is.
posted by girlmightlive at 9:04 AM on October 22, 2020 [5 favorites]
posted by girlmightlive at 9:04 AM on October 22, 2020 [5 favorites]
"He says to just keep them in and don't worry about doing any editing because some of the stuff on the tapes might be personal and he'd prefer me to not really be looking at them."
He knows, or at least suspects this is in there. It's kind of gross that he did that without telling you, but it sounds like you're expected to transfer them to DVD without discussion.
What you're doing is like working at a film developing lab - your job now involves intimate views into peoples lives, and doing your job requires discretion. If this makes you uncomfortable, you probably shouldn't take on any more clients.
posted by weed donkey at 9:05 AM on October 22, 2020 [9 favorites]
He knows, or at least suspects this is in there. It's kind of gross that he did that without telling you, but it sounds like you're expected to transfer them to DVD without discussion.
What you're doing is like working at a film developing lab - your job now involves intimate views into peoples lives, and doing your job requires discretion. If this makes you uncomfortable, you probably shouldn't take on any more clients.
posted by weed donkey at 9:05 AM on October 22, 2020 [9 favorites]
I note that it is completely okay to stop the job if you are uncomfortable with the content. "I was conducting the video and audio spot check and I came across one of your personal tapes. Because I have to do this for all tapes I've decided that it's safer to stop the work at this point. I will provide you with the dvds I've already transferred and will stop here."
posted by Karaage at 9:06 AM on October 22, 2020 [5 favorites]
posted by Karaage at 9:06 AM on October 22, 2020 [5 favorites]
Response by poster: Ok, from the sounds of it he was planning to give this to his parents as a gift and he's made other comments that indicate he might be giving it to them right after I drop off the completed files. Does that change anything? I just have this image in my mind that oh him giving them to his parents and an awkward scene following. I just don't want to feel like I should have said something or that I'm indirectly the cause of that.
posted by NoneOfTheAbove at 9:11 AM on October 22, 2020
posted by NoneOfTheAbove at 9:11 AM on October 22, 2020
If you're willing to continue the work and are able to continue the work without having to look at any more of the content, a potential response could be:
"I was conducting the video and audio spot check and one of the tapes appeared to contain sexual content. I stopped reviewing at that point, but I wanted to see if you wanted to review the tapes yourself for content and screen out anything you didn't want transferred to DVD. Otherwise, I will continue to copy the remainder of the tapes without any further quality checks that require me to view the content. Please let me know how you wish to proceed."
posted by Karaage at 9:18 AM on October 22, 2020 [8 favorites]
"I was conducting the video and audio spot check and one of the tapes appeared to contain sexual content. I stopped reviewing at that point, but I wanted to see if you wanted to review the tapes yourself for content and screen out anything you didn't want transferred to DVD. Otherwise, I will continue to copy the remainder of the tapes without any further quality checks that require me to view the content. Please let me know how you wish to proceed."
posted by Karaage at 9:18 AM on October 22, 2020 [8 favorites]
Best answer: Honestly, if he gives his parents a DVD from an amateur data-transfer guy from Craigslist without at least checking it first, I'd say he's on the hook for what they see on that DVD. I wouldn't think about this any further, personally.
posted by sagc at 9:22 AM on October 22, 2020 [28 favorites]
posted by sagc at 9:22 AM on October 22, 2020 [28 favorites]
Ok, from the sounds of it he was planning to give this to his parents as a gift and he's made other comments that indicate he might be giving it to them right after I drop off the completed files. Does that change anything?
I get this but you're not responsible for this person's choices after completing the job. You have to detach a bit from these kinds of things.
You two have already (vaguely) discussed that there are personal things on the tapes, and he's said he'd rather you do what he hired you to do and not worry about the content of the tapes. I understand it feels awkward but I believe you should take him at his word.
I note that it is completely okay to stop the job if you are uncomfortable with the content.
I personally don't think this is a great idea, as it will just prolong your contact with this person and you seem uncomfortable with him. I think you should do the job as agreed to. If you decide to continue, put in your ad that any tapes with adult content will be returned. Lesson learned.
posted by girlmightlive at 9:23 AM on October 22, 2020 [1 favorite]
I get this but you're not responsible for this person's choices after completing the job. You have to detach a bit from these kinds of things.
You two have already (vaguely) discussed that there are personal things on the tapes, and he's said he'd rather you do what he hired you to do and not worry about the content of the tapes. I understand it feels awkward but I believe you should take him at his word.
I note that it is completely okay to stop the job if you are uncomfortable with the content.
I personally don't think this is a great idea, as it will just prolong your contact with this person and you seem uncomfortable with him. I think you should do the job as agreed to. If you decide to continue, put in your ad that any tapes with adult content will be returned. Lesson learned.
posted by girlmightlive at 9:23 AM on October 22, 2020 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: I just want to add - I don't really care about the content and it doesn't really make me uncomfortable. The part that makes me uncomfortable is just not knowing what the appropriate thing to do here is. I absolutely don't mind copying the sex tapes. I just wasn't sure if anything needed to be said about them or if it was sufficient to just transfer them as asked and not mention them.
posted by NoneOfTheAbove at 9:28 AM on October 22, 2020
posted by NoneOfTheAbove at 9:28 AM on October 22, 2020
"No problem, I tell him that I'm just doing some quick checks for video and audio quality and that's it. He seems fine with that."
You gave him your word that you wouldn't be looking. Absent any blatant illegality you happen to see, be professional, do the job, and keep your word.
posted by Capt. Renault at 9:29 AM on October 22, 2020 [2 favorites]
You gave him your word that you wouldn't be looking. Absent any blatant illegality you happen to see, be professional, do the job, and keep your word.
posted by Capt. Renault at 9:29 AM on October 22, 2020 [2 favorites]
Best answer: Your job is to transfer material from VHS to DVD not to save this guy from the potential humiliation and embarrassment of giving sex tapes to his parents.
He made his own bed, let him lie in it.
posted by brookeb at 9:29 AM on October 22, 2020 [15 favorites]
He made his own bed, let him lie in it.
posted by brookeb at 9:29 AM on October 22, 2020 [15 favorites]
When you give him back the tapes, tell him, "All good. Please check all the DVDs before you give them as gifts."
Now you have given him fair warning about as vague as his warning about personal stuff.
Cash check and move on.
posted by AugustWest at 9:35 AM on October 22, 2020 [34 favorites]
Now you have given him fair warning about as vague as his warning about personal stuff.
Cash check and move on.
posted by AugustWest at 9:35 AM on October 22, 2020 [34 favorites]
he literally told you not to look at or evaluate the content.
it's fine, just do what he paid you to do.
you're not wrong to think he's a weirdo tho
posted by fingersandtoes at 10:01 AM on October 22, 2020 [2 favorites]
it's fine, just do what he paid you to do.
you're not wrong to think he's a weirdo tho
posted by fingersandtoes at 10:01 AM on October 22, 2020 [2 favorites]
I have a visceral reaction that strongly says you shouldn’t transfer the sex tapes. You have no way of knowing whether the other party in those tapes would be okay with having them digitized. Even if they were okay with them being recorded in the first place, the world of data transfer was so different then. You’re making it way easier for these videos to potentially be uploaded online.
Perhaps this response is because I’ve been a victim of sexual violence, but I would be concerned that perhaps the whole point of this guy giving you those specific tapes was to get them digitized for use as revenge porn.
You’re not actually a drugstore film developer. You’re an individual, and you can choose to act with discretion. You can say that you’re sorry, but any time you noticed sexual content, you stopped the digitization. If necessary you can discount the cost a little, and going forward change your listing to indicate that you won’t be transferring videos of explicit sexual content, and point to laws about revenge porn as why.
Probably this dude is lazy, not vicious. But the very real thing about people who commit sexual violence is that they mostly seem like normal people.
posted by ocherdraco at 10:05 AM on October 22, 2020 [34 favorites]
Perhaps this response is because I’ve been a victim of sexual violence, but I would be concerned that perhaps the whole point of this guy giving you those specific tapes was to get them digitized for use as revenge porn.
You’re not actually a drugstore film developer. You’re an individual, and you can choose to act with discretion. You can say that you’re sorry, but any time you noticed sexual content, you stopped the digitization. If necessary you can discount the cost a little, and going forward change your listing to indicate that you won’t be transferring videos of explicit sexual content, and point to laws about revenge porn as why.
Probably this dude is lazy, not vicious. But the very real thing about people who commit sexual violence is that they mostly seem like normal people.
posted by ocherdraco at 10:05 AM on October 22, 2020 [34 favorites]
In the future, you will want to ensure that you have this situation covered as part of a signed contract with your clients. There is a shockingly large market for copying home video VHS sex tapes to DVD. You might want to include language that the client signs that says, "Sexual content on client-provided data sources will be copied as-is." You also want to make sure you make your clients sign something saying that there is no illegal content on the tapes they want you to copy, which is an important CYA for you.
posted by juniperesque at 10:07 AM on October 22, 2020 [6 favorites]
posted by juniperesque at 10:07 AM on October 22, 2020 [6 favorites]
Some further thoughts - maybe reach out and say that "I think I accidentally saw some of what you mean when you said some of the material was personal. May I confirm - should I skip copying those bits? I just want to be clear."
I think he will understand what you're referring to.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:17 AM on October 22, 2020 [3 favorites]
I think he will understand what you're referring to.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:17 AM on October 22, 2020 [3 favorites]
^My concern would be that the customer is testing the waters.
Unfortunately, a couple of tapes out of the fifty refused to load. While he now has a lot of material for his parents' celebration, he may want to engage a professional restoration service to meet the small remaining portion of his transferring needs.
Or not.
posted by Iris Gambol at 10:19 AM on October 22, 2020 [2 favorites]
Unfortunately, a couple of tapes out of the fifty refused to load. While he now has a lot of material for his parents' celebration, he may want to engage a professional restoration service to meet the small remaining portion of his transferring needs.
Or not.
posted by Iris Gambol at 10:19 AM on October 22, 2020 [2 favorites]
Strongly agree with ocherdraco here. You're opening Pandora's box. I would politely decline to transfer the sexual content with an "I'm sorry, that won't be possible."
posted by gnutron at 10:28 AM on October 22, 2020 [2 favorites]
posted by gnutron at 10:28 AM on October 22, 2020 [2 favorites]
I personally would not digitise homemade sex tapes without the consent of both featured parties. If one of the participants would not actually want these digitised it is not ethical to do so, and you have no idea.
posted by stillnocturnal at 10:31 AM on October 22, 2020 [11 favorites]
posted by stillnocturnal at 10:31 AM on October 22, 2020 [11 favorites]
I'm on the side that says unless you have some reason to suspect there's something illegal going on, just do the job he hired you to do. Which is NOT to worry about what he does or doesn't give to his parents. Just. Transfer. The. Tapes. If you continue to do this type of work, you will see tons of stuff like this. I'm not sure why its such a big deal.
posted by WalkerWestridge at 10:31 AM on October 22, 2020
posted by WalkerWestridge at 10:31 AM on October 22, 2020
that's true, I hadn't thought about laws against revenge porn.certainly you have no obligation to participate in something that could be illegal, regardless of what preference he expressed.
going forward you should definitely make clients sign something saying there's no illegal content on any tapes before accepting the business. and if you want, you can do the same for this guy before continuing. you don't even have to get into why.
posted by fingersandtoes at 10:32 AM on October 22, 2020
going forward you should definitely make clients sign something saying there's no illegal content on any tapes before accepting the business. and if you want, you can do the same for this guy before continuing. you don't even have to get into why.
posted by fingersandtoes at 10:32 AM on October 22, 2020
I personally would not digitise homemade sex tapes without the consent of both featured parties.
Yes. My worry would be consent. I'd decline to transfer those tapes. And going forward include a clause relating to content in your contracts.
posted by JenMarie at 10:33 AM on October 22, 2020 [6 favorites]
Yes. My worry would be consent. I'd decline to transfer those tapes. And going forward include a clause relating to content in your contracts.
posted by JenMarie at 10:33 AM on October 22, 2020 [6 favorites]
This is a well trod area in digital file management. Tape operators, back up operators, email admins, server admins, network admins, support specialists, etc. see this sort of information _all_ _the_ _time_ while executing their duties even if it is just folder/filenames. There are reams of policy and policy discussion out there considering how to set and apply policy if you want to dig into best practices.
However, it sure sounds like your client knew what was there. IMO the sexual material is likely why he hired you, a small time contractor, and not some chain service. You can make a decision on whether to provide this service or not but I don't think it is professional to pick and choose afterwards. It is fine to decline work once new information comes up but you should reject the whole contract and not just the parts you have problems with. IE: either digitize it all with discretion or digitize none of it making whatever excuse, honest or not, you feel like. And yes, if you want to avoid this sort of data you need to make it clear in your contract that you don't accept this sort of material.
And you should definitely have a contract that also lays out remedies if originals are lost/damaged. I mention it only because you appear to have been blindsided by a very predictable situation second only to data loss in it's ubiquity. If nothing else hedge a policy from a well known large scale provider.
posted by Mitheral at 10:52 AM on October 22, 2020 [5 favorites]
However, it sure sounds like your client knew what was there. IMO the sexual material is likely why he hired you, a small time contractor, and not some chain service. You can make a decision on whether to provide this service or not but I don't think it is professional to pick and choose afterwards. It is fine to decline work once new information comes up but you should reject the whole contract and not just the parts you have problems with. IE: either digitize it all with discretion or digitize none of it making whatever excuse, honest or not, you feel like. And yes, if you want to avoid this sort of data you need to make it clear in your contract that you don't accept this sort of material.
And you should definitely have a contract that also lays out remedies if originals are lost/damaged. I mention it only because you appear to have been blindsided by a very predictable situation second only to data loss in it's ubiquity. If nothing else hedge a policy from a well known large scale provider.
posted by Mitheral at 10:52 AM on October 22, 2020 [5 favorites]
Do you feel okay about copying the sex tapes? Does it appear that all involved are aware of the camera?
Me, I'd do the other work, decline the sex tapes.
posted by theora55 at 10:53 AM on October 22, 2020 [1 favorite]
Me, I'd do the other work, decline the sex tapes.
posted by theora55 at 10:53 AM on October 22, 2020 [1 favorite]
If it looks like they are in college, you don’t really know if all parties are college age or there is an underage participant. I would feel uncomfortable doing this for many personal moral and also legal reasons (not saying I know the law, but I would not want to be a party to this knowing there could be illegal content).
Can’t give very useful tangible advice (except maybe sorry, my machine is broken if you need a way to back out) but that’s what was on my mind.
posted by stoneandstar at 11:00 AM on October 22, 2020 [3 favorites]
Can’t give very useful tangible advice (except maybe sorry, my machine is broken if you need a way to back out) but that’s what was on my mind.
posted by stoneandstar at 11:00 AM on October 22, 2020 [3 favorites]
My brother worked for two video transfer companies, and it was a policy at both companies that pornographic content would not be accepted for transfer. (they weren't HUNTING for it but the transfers played back on a screen as part of the process so it was hard to avoid seeing at least parts of every tape). They still got customers bringing in home sex videos or taped cable porn and, if discovered, they had to return it to the client and explain they could not complete the job per their policy. Sometimes the tapes were *only* sex videos, and almost always the customer was not surprised. It was pretty rare for anyone to be blindsided by forgotten porn.
So it's very possible this guy already tried to do a transfer elsewhere and got rejected, or he is specifically looking for discretion because he knows the pro shops won't take the tapes. It is up to you if you want to just finish the job and not mention it to this guy, but it really sounds like he's very aware of the sex videos in there, so I would not worry about Mom & Pop having a nasty shock as cake is served. He may even specifically be seeking the sex tapes and is using the anniversary & family tapes as a plausible cover to also transfer the sex tapes. (not saying he's lying about the anniversary, but doing 50 tapes of mostly family videos with some "personal stuff" mixed in, is much less awkward than straight up submitting the two sex tapes you want transferred). Going forward you could put it in your ad that adult content will be returned without transferring, and that would be very much in line with the industry.
posted by castlebravo at 11:18 AM on October 22, 2020 [14 favorites]
So it's very possible this guy already tried to do a transfer elsewhere and got rejected, or he is specifically looking for discretion because he knows the pro shops won't take the tapes. It is up to you if you want to just finish the job and not mention it to this guy, but it really sounds like he's very aware of the sex videos in there, so I would not worry about Mom & Pop having a nasty shock as cake is served. He may even specifically be seeking the sex tapes and is using the anniversary & family tapes as a plausible cover to also transfer the sex tapes. (not saying he's lying about the anniversary, but doing 50 tapes of mostly family videos with some "personal stuff" mixed in, is much less awkward than straight up submitting the two sex tapes you want transferred). Going forward you could put it in your ad that adult content will be returned without transferring, and that would be very much in line with the industry.
posted by castlebravo at 11:18 AM on October 22, 2020 [14 favorites]
Do you think all parties in the sex tape are
- adults
- enthusiastically consenting to the sex
- enthusiastically consenting to being videotaped?
If yes to those 3 questions, I would convert it and just flag it for him: “in my spot checks I saw that there is some sexual content on at least 2 tapes, A and B. You had mentioned giving them to your folks so just flagging it for you”.
If no to any of those 3 questions, I would keep those tapes aside: “in my spot checks I noticed some sexual content on tapes A and B; that’s not within the scope of my business so I put those tapes aside and didn’t convert them.”
If the tapes show 2 possible minors enthusiastically consenting and one person is the guy (like it’s him and his teen girlfriend) then just don’t copy them (because minors).
If you see anything nonconsensual or with a possibly large age gap involving a minor, I would consider reporting them.
posted by nouvelle-personne at 3:29 PM on October 22, 2020 [2 favorites]
- adults
- enthusiastically consenting to the sex
- enthusiastically consenting to being videotaped?
If yes to those 3 questions, I would convert it and just flag it for him: “in my spot checks I saw that there is some sexual content on at least 2 tapes, A and B. You had mentioned giving them to your folks so just flagging it for you”.
If no to any of those 3 questions, I would keep those tapes aside: “in my spot checks I noticed some sexual content on tapes A and B; that’s not within the scope of my business so I put those tapes aside and didn’t convert them.”
If the tapes show 2 possible minors enthusiastically consenting and one person is the guy (like it’s him and his teen girlfriend) then just don’t copy them (because minors).
If you see anything nonconsensual or with a possibly large age gap involving a minor, I would consider reporting them.
posted by nouvelle-personne at 3:29 PM on October 22, 2020 [2 favorites]
If the videos look legal and you're not bothered by doing the work, I'd probably just copy everything to DVDs and send it back with a brief note like "Here's the videos. Heads up, one of the ones I checked for quality had a sex tape on it. Thanks for your business."
I mean, sure, it's not your responsibility to keep this guy from giving his parents a sex tape for their anniversary (HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!), but it's not like it takes a ton of effort for you to tip him off, either. The 80s were a long time ago and while he might have known, he also might have thought "those tapes" weren't in this particular pile.
posted by hungrytiger at 6:03 PM on October 22, 2020 [1 favorite]
I mean, sure, it's not your responsibility to keep this guy from giving his parents a sex tape for their anniversary (HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!), but it's not like it takes a ton of effort for you to tip him off, either. The 80s were a long time ago and while he might have known, he also might have thought "those tapes" weren't in this particular pile.
posted by hungrytiger at 6:03 PM on October 22, 2020 [1 favorite]
Unless he is currently married to the other person(s) on the sex tapes, it’s highly doubtful that the other person gave consent to digitize these. There’s a strong chance that he’s planning on making multiple copies and selling them, or uploading them for sale, without the other person’s consent. Please don’t be a party to this. This could ruin someone’s life.
posted by MexicanYenta at 12:12 AM on October 23, 2020 [4 favorites]
posted by MexicanYenta at 12:12 AM on October 23, 2020 [4 favorites]
I wouldn't digitise the sex tapes for the reasons described by Ocherdraco.
"Hi Jim, in the process of digitising the tapes I realised that two of the tapes contain explicit sexual material. Unfortunately I wasn't comfortable with digitising these. Going forward, I will make it clear from the outset that I won't work with explicit material.
I'll be issuing a refund of $x, since I only finished 48 of the 50 tapes for you. I hope you understand. Thank you for your business."
posted by kinddieserzeit at 3:58 AM on October 23, 2020 [3 favorites]
"Hi Jim, in the process of digitising the tapes I realised that two of the tapes contain explicit sexual material. Unfortunately I wasn't comfortable with digitising these. Going forward, I will make it clear from the outset that I won't work with explicit material.
I'll be issuing a refund of $x, since I only finished 48 of the 50 tapes for you. I hope you understand. Thank you for your business."
posted by kinddieserzeit at 3:58 AM on October 23, 2020 [3 favorites]
enthusiastically
watching someone else's non-professional sex recording with an eye to assessing whether the participants' enthusiasm is up to your standards is the most offensively invasively inexcusable thing you could do with this material. do not do this. period. that is an activity for cops or creeps only. if you have any serious concern that illegal activity is captured or that not all participants might agree to having this material transfered from VHS to DVD-- like for real, not manufactured just this second because you want to find a concern--then watching it with this kind of specific attention would be the most violating and invasive thing you, a stranger, could do.
either you watch it and judge its contents because the guy gave it to you for transfer and you think you have a right, or you have an ethical worry that requires you keep your own eyes off it. you can't have the ethical worry AND watch it to judge, it's one or the other.
posted by queenofbithynia at 5:56 PM on October 23, 2020 [3 favorites]
watching someone else's non-professional sex recording with an eye to assessing whether the participants' enthusiasm is up to your standards is the most offensively invasively inexcusable thing you could do with this material. do not do this. period. that is an activity for cops or creeps only. if you have any serious concern that illegal activity is captured or that not all participants might agree to having this material transfered from VHS to DVD-- like for real, not manufactured just this second because you want to find a concern--then watching it with this kind of specific attention would be the most violating and invasive thing you, a stranger, could do.
either you watch it and judge its contents because the guy gave it to you for transfer and you think you have a right, or you have an ethical worry that requires you keep your own eyes off it. you can't have the ethical worry AND watch it to judge, it's one or the other.
posted by queenofbithynia at 5:56 PM on October 23, 2020 [3 favorites]
I'm not sure why its such a big deal.
It's a big deal because it could ruin the woman's life. Do y'all not know how revenge porn works? She did not consent to being recorded in a manner that could be easily duplicated throughout the world at the click of a button. That didn't exist when this tape was made. She's a human being, and she did not consent to this. This is a question of ethics, not the law.
posted by k8lin at 4:11 AM on October 26, 2020 [2 favorites]
It's a big deal because it could ruin the woman's life. Do y'all not know how revenge porn works? She did not consent to being recorded in a manner that could be easily duplicated throughout the world at the click of a button. That didn't exist when this tape was made. She's a human being, and she did not consent to this. This is a question of ethics, not the law.
posted by k8lin at 4:11 AM on October 26, 2020 [2 favorites]
It sounds like this is just a sideline, not a serious business for you, but particularly for small businesses that can be seriously damaged by bad reviews, it's important to have a clear policy up front that everyone explicitly agrees to.
posted by rikschell at 1:42 PM on October 29, 2020
posted by rikschell at 1:42 PM on October 29, 2020
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by kingdead at 9:01 AM on October 22, 2020 [37 favorites]