How can I sleep through a noisy roommate?
December 13, 2019 8:35 PM   Subscribe

Up until recently, I never worried about getting enough sleep. I grew up in a typical suburban house, and the noise insulation was really great. Every single night I wanted to go to sleep, there was no background from either inside or outside because my bedroom was in a distant part of the house facing the backyard.

When I was in college, I lived in the dorms for 3 years. Though I lived with many roommates, sleeping was never an issue as I would always just coordinate my sleeping schedule with theirs. If my roommates wanted to have a late night playing video games until midnight, I would join them and my only obligations the next day would be walking to classes on campus and studying. So it wouldn't bother me staying up late certain nights as I could nap on campus as needed during the day and the school calendar was only 9 out of 12 months anyway so there were enough breaks to catch up on sleep.

My last year at uni I lived in what was close to a mansion off campus. I had an upstairs bedroom and the place was so large that again, my room was quiet relative to the rest of the house. I wouldn't hear roommates talking, watching tv, or entering and leaving the house. I knew at the time it was a pretty good setup.

Now I've been out of school a few years now living in a tiny nyc apartment with a roommate. And it's absolutely infuriating. Because the place is so tiny, I hear everything. When my roommate wakes up, when he showers, what he's watching on tv, etc. And because my commitment now is a 40 hour week, I need enough sleep to function. So if I want to go to sleep at 11 for example and my roommate still hasn't come home, I find it useless trying to navigate it. Either I can try sleeping and then inevitably wake up when he comes home as I'll hear the door close, his footsteps around the apartment, brushing his teeth, etc. Or I can wait until he's finally asleep around 1230/1 and then be exhausted the next day from not getting enough sleep.

I've never had this problem before as I've never lived with a roommate in such a small space. I've followed the advice on the internet but nothing works:

- sleeping with earplugs will eliminate lower volume noises but exaggerate louder ones. So if I wear earplugs and try sleeping, my roommate closing the door when he gets home sounds even louder than it would otherwise
-for playing white noise to be loud enough to drown out my roommate, again it would be so loud that it wakes me up in the middle of the night too. At that point I turn it off but then I hear my roommate when we wakes up early so I have a night of fragmented sleep
-running a loud box fan has the same impact as above
-outside of paying an absurd amount of money to soundproof my room, the soundproofing measures such as getting a bookshelf, acoustic panels/curtains hardly had an effect either

I know part of the problem is me but I also think the apartments here aren't helping. I really think I'd fare much better living in a house because I know that although no situation is perfect, at least I'll be able to function. Right now my life is trying to navigate finding time to sleep which isn't a way to live.

I've heard suggestions to live alone but the previous times I've tried it I really, really disliked it. I know I can do it if necessary but in the past I haven't handled it well. Not only did I find it depressing but I could never relax as my office really isn't chatty and my attempts at chatting up my coworkers are usually futile. So then instead of being able to relax in my apartment after work, I have to run around the city and find bars/events to go to just so I can have some sort of socialization. While again, I understand nothing in life is perfect, I find this equally exhausting. It felt like every second of my day had to be occupied while I lived alone or I felt like I was getting stir crazy. The benefit of having a roommate is I can go home knowing there will be some sort of socialization waiting when I'm there.

I just want to live with a quiet roommate with normal sleeping hours but for some reason this has evaded me to this point. I also find it harder to get quality roommates each passing year as I think many people come to similar situations as myself and just find it easier to live alone than having worry about the aforementioned problems. I even made an ad that mentioned quiet hours during the week between 11pm-7a but this ad received less responses than the one in which this wasn't mentioned. I think this may be in part to me coming off as neurotic. (Which I can concede a bit but I find is so hard to believe that there aren't other people who feel similarly)

Has anyone else gone through this? Thanks
posted by 47WaysToLeaveYourLover to Human Relations (33 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
 
It sounds like you're an especially light sleeper. Have you tried making any changes to your sleeping arrangements to encourage yourself to sleep more deeply and thus less likely to wake up to the sound of tooth brushing? For instance, you might find a weighted blanket (recently available in normal stores, it's awesome) to help keep you relaxed so you can fall back asleep quickly. Or maybe you could adjust the temperature in your room (you can get an electric heating pad that you stick on the foot of your bed with an automatic shutoff that will keep your toes toasty, or crack your window for a cool breeze), or get pillows that are better for your sleeping posture. Basically, make your bed the comfiest thing to encourage deeper sleep.

Have you talked to your roommate about this at all? It's not particularly unreasonable to have quiet hours in an apartment building, but they're more like no vacuuming or running around with large dogs and kids after midnight, and less no opening doors or taking showers. I feel like you could probably ask your roommate to be sensitive to the door issue, though - could the two of you oil the door hinges and maybe do some insulation strips on the side and he could do his best to be gentle with the door at night? Asking him to be careful about louder noises is entirely reasonable. Then, you could wear earplugs for the quieter sounds.
posted by Mizu at 8:52 PM on December 13, 2019 [1 favorite]


I honestly think most people in your boat end up living alone. I understand why you don't want to do so, but it does not sound as though your roommate is being unreasonable. I can imagine you might be able to agree about limiting the television after 11pm or asking your roommate to wear a headset, but quiet hours don't normally include normal quiet activities like coming home, opening or closing the door, and taking a shower. To me is sounds as though you do have a normal quiet roommate with normal sleeping hours, which is an opinion you may want to evaluate if you want a shared apartment. You aren't likely to get a lot better than this.

I have been in your situation, but not as you-- as your roommate. I finally decided to live alone because my roommate couldn't stand that I woke up early to run and was in the shower before 7. She would get very upset that I would wake her up when I left the house. I had enough of that in the end, even though I liked her, and we both decided to get our own spaces.

If you can find a shared house, with a room on your own floor at the top then that might be the best. I don't know how easy such things are to find in NYC, to be honest.
posted by frumiousb at 9:23 PM on December 13, 2019 [18 favorites]


I completely empathize, being a light sleeper who is also very sensitive to noise. You could try buying a bed tent (they're usually around $100-150) and adding some sound- insulating foam to the inside. Maybe also try some band-style headphones designed specifically for sleeping and pipe white noise at a quiet volume through them so that the white noise doesn't have to be so loud that it disturbs your sleep. Good luck!
posted by mezzanayne at 9:44 PM on December 13, 2019 [1 favorite]


Response by poster: frumiousb - yeah, he's a normal guy and we get along well. He doesn't "slam" the door when he comes home, it's just that the apartment is so tiny that you hear everything. I think the only group living situation I could handle is in a house with a older, quiet roommate. This way I wouldn't have to worry about noises from my roommate entering and leaving.. the problem with this is that I would have to relocate, probably to a suburb which would lead to a more involved commute. This seems like overkill compared to living alone, i think. I just don't want to go through the stress of living alone again because for me at least, I found that worse than my current setup.

I also do want to have a family one day so that would involve waking up at odd hours when the wife and kids can't sleep, etc. So I'm thinking maybe I should just get used to it. I hate being sleep deprived though, I feel like I'm going through my day at 75-80%

mezzanayne - I haven't heard of a bed tent but outside of living in a coffin, I don't know how effective that would be. How can you breathe inside a bed tent? Haha is it safe? I've tried band-style headphones to some success but it's still not the same as being able to relax before you go to sleep.
posted by 47WaysToLeaveYourLover at 9:54 PM on December 13, 2019


I don't know about white noise machines, but there are white noise phone/tablet apps that will play for a preset time, then shut off, thus obviating the "the noise starts bothering me in the middle of the night" problem, if not the "I wake up when my roommate wakes up" problem.

I hate to say it, but, as a confirmed night owl who's not getting any better with age, I think those of us who have unusual sleeping needs do usually end up living on our own. Cuts down on the murder rate. Your needs are even more specialized than you think--as we get older, fewer of us still renting want to be expected to supply the social needs of our roommates. (I mean, if it works out that way, great; but at a certain point, most people get to "yeah, we're sharing space, but that really doesn't translate into being BFFs anymore.")
posted by praemunire at 10:15 PM on December 13, 2019 [3 favorites]


Response by poster: praemunire - I was thinking as such. It's not even socializing, for me it's just nice knowing there's another human living in the same area that I have the option of talking to. I wish I could handle living alone better so I wouldn't have to compulsively find roommates to live with.

I was thinking an option was to buy a house so I can have roommates as wanted, and then having the option to kick them out if we don't mesh well. The problem being that's at least 10 years away at the rate I'm earning. Hah.

I also think it'd be easier to live with a significant other as I would just coordinate my sleeping schedule with hers. Though I understand that's not really a useful panacea for this situation
posted by 47WaysToLeaveYourLover at 10:21 PM on December 13, 2019


I've found pure white noise to be too high pitched which wakes me up, so I use pink or brown noise. There are tons of YouTube videos that are just 10 hours of sounds. I actually found I sleep best to a video of the Enterprise from Star Trek: TNG hovering in space for hours to work best. Just a light hum that's not too high pitched but consistent. Sometimes I'll even use combinations of one noise source (fan/etc) plus a YouTube brown or pink noise that covers more range of frequency to help so that no one sound is as likely to wake me.
posted by downtohisturtles at 10:43 PM on December 13, 2019 [5 favorites]


I don’t understand why you are turning the white noise on and off? Why don’t you turn it on when you go to sleep and leave it on all night?

I also suggest playing with different types of white noise.
posted by like_neon at 11:51 PM on December 13, 2019 [1 favorite]


There are lots of similar questions to yours here, about reducing noise at least. From experience, it is very hard to negotiate that with others when you have certain sleep/quiet needs that end up interfering with others' reasonable rights to make normal noises at certain times. I've tried every common suggestion here. The only thing that works for me is a combination of living with people who accommodate me, to a certain extent (not least because I accommodate them about things they need that inconvenience me) and the use of a white noise machine and Mac's swimmer earplugs. Other than a solution like that, you will likely have to move, and/or develop a social life outside of work that allows you to live alone.
posted by Armed Only With Hubris at 11:59 PM on December 13, 2019 [1 favorite]


Mod note: One deleted. Sorry, 47WaysToLeaveYourLover, but Ask Metafilter isn't really for back and forth conversation. It's fine to add further info about your situation if necessary, or clarify details if something seems misunderstood, or answer a question, but otherwise, you can just relax and take in the answers. Thanks!
posted by taz (staff) at 12:38 AM on December 14, 2019


Response by poster: ok, no worries taz. sorry again and thanks.
posted by 47WaysToLeaveYourLover at 12:45 AM on December 14, 2019


I wonder if you gave up on the "quiet hours" idea too fast. It cut down on the number of applicants -- but yes, isn't that the purpose? to screen out the people who don't want to be quiet?
posted by slidell at 1:34 AM on December 14, 2019 [2 favorites]


Response by poster: slidell - i'll let this be one my last responses as I now know this isn't a back-and-forth type of forum. Of the one's that responded, only one eventually came for a viewing and he eventually signed a lease elsewhere. I found it was very easy to get emails showing interest but very few from both ads were actually interested enough to come for a viewing.

I think if I work hard enough I could eventually find someone that had a similar mindset to what they're looking for in an apartment share. I guess my question is moreso, it this healthy to keep playing roommate roulette? Is there anything wrong with that? Or would it be better for me in the long run to learn how to live alone and be happy?
posted by 47WaysToLeaveYourLover at 2:23 AM on December 14, 2019


Learn to live alone and be happy. If you literally cannot sleep with another human in the apartment and every noise blocking trick you tried does not work and there's no way you can live in a house in NYC, there aren't any other secret noise blocking tricks that we know of to fix this for you. I fear you will have this issue with an SO as well, because "coordinate with others' sleep schedules" is not always a reasonable thing that you can do.
Admittedly this roommate sounds like a bit of a night owl, but most people do live on an 11 to 7 schedule and if you just hear someone at all and it bothers you...

It sounds like the only thing that will work for you is living in a house with a bedroom far away from others, but if you live in a small NYC apartment, I assume that isn't doable for you. If you can't solve that problem and every noise blocking trick you try doesn't work for you, then living alone may be your best bet. It sounds like apartment living isn't your jam, but you'll still have to hear others through the walls and it'll probably still bug you. I don't know what to tell you there (she says, writing at 4 a.m. while hearing some weird drilling noise in the complex).

"I also find it harder to get quality roommates each passing year as I think many people come to similar situations as myself and just find it easier to live alone than having worry about the aforementioned problems."

Yes, the older you get, the harder it gets to find roommates at all (I gave up years ago), plus they move on, get girlfriends, what have you.
posted by jenfullmoon at 4:11 AM on December 14, 2019 [3 favorites]


for playing white noise to be loud enough to drown out my roommate, again it would be so loud that it wakes me up in the middle of the night too.

I'm going to second what someone said above; use the white noise but set it up so that it turns off or even better gradually fades out after a certain amount of time, once you've already fallen asleep. This feature is usually callled "Sleep Timer." I have a podcast that helps me get to sleep when I'm traveilng, but the music at the end of the podcast wakes me if I let it play through to the end, so I use this feature and it works really well.
posted by escabeche at 5:31 AM on December 14, 2019


Get a sleep study done. It may be that you are never getting deeply asleep enough to sleep through noises.

Anxiety is another reason why people sleep badly, so consider if you are too antsy to actually get deeply asleep.

Try sleeping sitting up.

Try self talk before you go to sleep. It is important not to go to sleep thinking, "Damn it, roommate is going to wake me up when he comes in. I hope he doesn't slam the door. And I always hear him throw his boots on the floor! Doesn't he know how noisy... etc." Thoughts like this at bed time mean that you are priming yourself to wake up, and are very useful when the anxious thoughts are being rehearsed when you want to wake up, such as worrying that you will sleep through your alarm so that you wake up with an adrenaline rush one minute and eleven seconds after your alarm fails to go off, but very unhelpful when you want to stay asleep.

Instead, firmly and kindly and convincingly instruct yourself that you don't need to wake up when room mate comes home, and that the sound of him coming home is a reassurance, because it's your signal that you are no longer alone, and thus are safer. Once you register the sound of him coming home you can go straight back to sleep and sleep nice and deeply. You are safe to go back to sleep so fast that you won't even remember hearing him come in when you wake up in the morning. The worst thing to think is that you have to wait for him to throw the second boot at the wall, and really should get up and tell him sternly to stop violating your vestibule with his selfish noise. You do not want to be thinking about how your territory and your sleep is being violated, as defensive thoughts like this are only good if you really do have to get up to throw stones at the wild dogs trying to get into your chicken house. They will ensure that you are prepared to leap up screaming and throwing things, which is not necessary in your current situation.

The sound of firetrucks and sirens are the good city workers keeping you safe while you sleep. The sound of the refrigerator humming is the sound of abundant food and safety from food poisoning and hunger. The sound of the people in the next apartment watching TV is the sound of nice people, who would bang hard on your door to wake up if there was any problem with the building, so their TV means it is safe to go asleep. In fact, they are even doing sentry duty for you. They are staying up, alert, so it is much safer to go to sleep... Your room mate is there to keep you from being alone and he is doing his duty. "One o'clock in the morning and all is well!" is what the watchman shouted so that people could go on sleeping and they learned to sleep through his shout, and to wake up worried if they didn't hear it. The sounds you hear are the signals to trigger sleeping, not waking. It's a matter of training yourself to relax more when you hear them instead of tensing up and waking.

There is the old story of the woman who complained that her husband snored and she couldn't sleep. She even made a recording of his noise to prove to him that he did indeed snore. Eventually the man died and the only way she found that she could sleep was if she played that recording at night.

Many people get cranky and anxious when they need to fall asleep and when they are short of sleep and it makes for a vicious circle. It should be functional because crankiness makes you go off somewhere alone to get away from those people instead of continuing to interact with them, and anxiety motivates you to get into your safe warm private secret nest, but instead some of us end up mentally bringing all those irritating people to bed with us, and don't feel hidden in our nests at all. If this is a factor, then strenuous work of some sort earlier in the day to burn off the anxiety biochemicals can help a lot.

No thoughts that occur in a cranky semi-wakeful state should be taken seriously. That is a time for mindfulness and detachment. Listen to your thoughts and label them. "Hmmm.... I am feeling resentful. Now I am thinking about the way the corner of the ceiling looks in the dark. Angry... about something my mother said back in the nineties. Oh, and now angry at my father. These covers are bunched up here.... thinking about bodily sensations. I feel my toes. Will my roommate wake me up?? That was a surge of anxiety. His boots! That's more anxiety. Funny, my neck is tensing up but my toes and feet are going limp and are just the right temperature..."
posted by Jane the Brown at 5:31 AM on December 14, 2019 [28 favorites]


Some things you might as well try in the meantime:

- earplugs rated at higher decibel levels than what you're using right now
- listening to music at night, with or without earplugs. Might help your brain filter out random noises
- visit a sleep specialist (or, I don't know, hypnotist? Occupational therapist?) just in case there's something you can do about sleeping so lightly

I'm wondering if training yourself to sleep through noises would be possible for you. It definitely can be done for some people (for example, I used to get woken up daily by the early-morning garbage truck at one apartment for a while, and then my brain apparently adjusted). No idea if it's a possibility for everyone. You could try, as an experiment, sleeping to a soundtrack of random noises for a few days or weeks. Possibly your brain would learn to filter things out a little. One thing you'd want to watch for is your emotional response to noises - if every time you get disturbed by a noise that leads to a spike in annoyance or frustration, that would make filtering it out harder. You'll want to try getting to a more neutral, or at least resigned, response if possible.

When advertising for roommates you'd want to say that you're looking for someone who keeps early hours or that you really value quiet at night, rather than specifying exact time ranges.
posted by trig at 5:38 AM on December 14, 2019


I’d get some custom fit sleeping earplugs (soundgear) along side making your bed/space as sleep conducive as possible per the suggestions already mentioned in this thread. Also take steps to block out any light that may come into your room - if roommate turns lights on, you may be sensing that as well causing you to wake. It may not be all sound that’s triggering your wake ups.
posted by Sassyfras at 6:49 AM on December 14, 2019


I am also a light sleeper. What worked for me when nothing else did was wax earplugs (Mack’s or the Walgreen’s generic, any other brand isn’t sticky enough). They block sound WAY better than foam earplugs. With the combination of a fan for white noise, I can’t hear my partner snoring next to me (I also had the problem that turning white noise up loud enough to drown it out woke me up—wax earplugs mean I don’t need it nearly as loud). I do think it’s the combination of earplugs and white noise that’s worked for me, so try both, but use wax instead of foam.

Also, it’s not impossible to find someone with a similar sleep schedule to yours. My partner and I are in bed by 11 almost every night, coming home past 9pm is almost unheard of, and we don’t get up until 9am. We’re both chronically ill and don’t like to drink or party + need a lot of sleep. People like that are out there, though I don’t have advice for finding them.
posted by brook horse at 7:38 AM on December 14, 2019 [1 favorite]


I’m a light sleeper and in difficult sleeping situations use a white noise app through in-ear earbuds. I never hear a thing. It’s made traveling so much less stressful.
posted by something something at 7:43 AM on December 14, 2019


It sounds to me like the apartment is the problem. You say it’s tiny, which leads me to believe you’re living in Manhattan, perhaps in a converted 1-bedroom.

If this is the case, move to Brooklyn or Queens. You’ll find larger apartments for less money with 2 actual bedrooms and a layout more conducive to roommate living.

My last New York apartment was a 2-bedroom in Greenpoint in a building built in like 1910 (so solid, thick, plaster walls) where each apartment ran the length of the building. One bedroom was at the front and one was at the back. I never heard a thing from my roommate.
posted by Automocar at 8:29 AM on December 14, 2019 [7 favorites]


You keep saying that you want a “quiet” roommate and that your current one is “noisy” but he sounds really not loud at all? It’s well within the range of normal for roommates to come home after midnight sometimes. Things like showering and watching tv at a normal volume are not examples of a roommate being “noisy.”

It sucks that you find living alone lonely but it seems like the best option for you. I know it can be hard to meet people in New York, but put some effort into finding a hobby group, church, volunteer organization, whatever it is that interests you so that you can stop feeling like your office and your apartment are your only social outlets.

(And definitely work on your coping methods for this. Treat yourself to the Cadillac of white noise machines if you have to. I would not be able to deal with having a partner who expects our sleep to synchronize perfectly every night).
posted by cakelite at 8:53 AM on December 14, 2019 [2 favorites]


Unfortunately they've been discontinued because their batteries are a bit flaky and they're very expensive but if you can get your hands on a pair of working Bose sleep buds which use in-ear noise masking with a range of sounds and have timer/ alarm etc, they are absolutely magic. They solved my problems with partner's staying up later than me and making noise and with noisy neighbours. You might still find someone selling a pair.
posted by Flitcraft at 11:13 AM on December 14, 2019


I came in to second brown noise vs white noise. It saved my life when we lived under people in the restaurant industry who came home to party at 2:30, and I had to be up at 5:30am. It takes some getting used to- I was never entirely comfortable with the loud roaring because I like to hear if, I dunno, someone is shouting "fire" outside the door- but it really is worth trying it for a full night for several weeks before you give up.
posted by oneirodynia at 12:30 PM on December 14, 2019


Seconding trying Brooklyn and Queens if you haven't already. I once lived in an apartment with a basement room that was really hard to fill, and was thus quite cheap for the size and location. Since we were on different floors, we didn't hear each other much if we were in our rooms. So this is something else you could try.
posted by chernoffhoeffding at 12:42 PM on December 14, 2019


It sounds to me like your roommate is generating a normal level of noise for "quiet time." Living solo could get rid of the noise within your apartment.. but I've found that the worst sorts of apartment noise comes through the walls from neighboring units (or the street). If those things aren't bugging then you're already ahead!

I'd suggest taking the ideas from this thread and make a prioritization list of things to try. The first item on the list can be something that is a free, easy change, and the last item on the list might being living alone. Having a concrete plan of things to try could take some frustration out of the situation.

What are you doing when you are woken/kept awake by your roommate? If you can't get back to sleep in 15-20 min, get out of bed, turn on a dim light and read a book. Something that is mellow and not overly engaging - for me that's a biography or pop science. I'd also suggest looking at things to help you sleep more deeply. Regular cardio would be a good option. Supplementing with magnesium might also help.
posted by Orrorin at 2:25 PM on December 14, 2019 [1 favorite]


Totally sympathize.

I've researched QuietOn active noise cancellation sleeping earbuds, but never pulled the trigger - pricey. The Bose ones, sounds like they're just an in-ear white noise generator. I think a lot of people/ reviews expected too much out of the QuietOns and are disappointed, but it's an option to explore.

Can you sleep with weather/ water sounds? There are videos on youtube of bamboo water gardens that run for a long time/ loops that I've used in the past (generator at a nearby construction site overnight, early morning neighbours, etc. etc.) with some success. I even downloaded my favourite one and made a shortcut on my desktop.
posted by porpoise at 5:04 PM on December 14, 2019


You've been really lucky up to now with the quiet living situations. Now you're in a more normal living-with-other-humans situation. You can either: shell out to live alone and sleep alone for ever; or learn to fall back to sleep having been woken up. If you meet and fall for someone and sync up your sleep schedules and it's perfectly great and you never wake each other up, that will inevitably change as that person or you changes. Somebody will start to snore. Somebody will start waking up at 4 a.m. and getting out of bed and stumbling thunderously into the nightstand every single morning of your life. You can use Jane the Brown's excellent tips to acclimate.
posted by Don Pepino at 6:22 AM on December 15, 2019 [1 favorite]


This Marpac Sound device is worth a shot. I'm completely hooked on mine.

The brain can only fixate on one sound at a time. When the white noise becomes that primary noise the other distractions, interruptions recede. Experiment.
posted by zenpop at 2:17 PM on December 15, 2019


One of the things that has helped improve my quality AND quantity of sleep is getting more chill about the things that disturb my sleep. In my 20s and 30s, I struggled with pretty intrusive insomnia, both falling asleep and getting back to sleep after being awakened. And whenever something intruded on my sleep, it stressed me out enormously, and I would then be dealing with a lot of adrenaline and frustration and anxiety about how tired I was going to be and how awful it was to have to go through a day underslept.

Things that helped me stop contributing to my own lack of sleep include:
- noticing how the day after a bad night, while it wasn't pleasant, it wasn't as bad as my nighttime mind made it out to be
- relaxing about the world sounds around me
- meditation, especially in the middle of the night, to help me be in good touch with my feelings

You're stressing yourself out, triggered by external noises and happenings, and you actually can change your inner experience.
posted by spindrifter at 9:12 AM on December 16, 2019


I second the suggestion for Mack's silicone earplugs for sleeping. They block out sound better than foam earplugs and are more comfortable too. They come in adult and kid sizes and you can reuse a pair for about a week.
posted by purple_bird at 11:30 AM on December 16, 2019 [1 favorite]


Hmm, have you given enough time to getting used to white noise?

I was able to drown out my roommates stomping footsteps upstairs and her closing doors by using foam earplugs and hooking my Bose mini soundlink (excellent bass) to a phone app that plays brown noise. It’s akin to having a loud AC on but with the earplugs it’s a low hum. You need the bass to drown out footsteps and doors.

Remember, use a brown noise app with a speaker, NOT a white noise.

Also I never had an issue hearing alarms and other important noises.
posted by christiehawk at 12:43 AM on December 18, 2019


You mentioned that you've tried earplugs, and I'll guess that they're the common foam type. I've found that most people are using them incorrectly. Roll them between your thumb and finger, gradually adding pressure and squeezing them to be smaller and smaller. Think 'needle' size - they will compress that much. That will make it easier to insert them into the canals far enough to be effective.

The trick is to get them as far into your ear canal as possible, almost until they touch the eardrum. Pulling on your earlobe and the other cartilage around will help get them around the bends within the canal. When you've got them situated properly, you'll notice the sound fade away as the plugs expand to fill the space in the canal. It's like someone is turning the volume down.
posted by DandyRandy at 2:21 AM on December 25, 2019


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