My dad is in recovery from major surgery; need a big long checklist.
October 12, 2019 1:09 PM Subscribe
My dad just had major emergency surgery; they didn't think he was going to live, but now he is apparently quite stable. He is lucid when he's awake, and so far he can easily answer random and fun, non-complicated yes/no questions, but he's otherwise nonfunctional, and recovery will be slow. My mom and I are trying to come up with a mega checklist of everything we should do.
We are in Illinois, if it matters. My dad has health insurance and short-term disability insurance. There is his "the filing cabinet"(tm) which, according to past-him, multiple times over the last few years, apparently will have every possible document and piece of information we might need for anything.
Maybe this is pretty straightforward, especially given "the filing cabinet." But, just in case, what are all the things you would do?
We are in Illinois, if it matters. My dad has health insurance and short-term disability insurance. There is his "the filing cabinet"(tm) which, according to past-him, multiple times over the last few years, apparently will have every possible document and piece of information we might need for anything.
Maybe this is pretty straightforward, especially given "the filing cabinet." But, just in case, what are all the things you would do?
Response by poster: I'm not really sure. I am casting a wide net, here. It's possible that this question will be too broad. Insurance we'll file and, for care, we'll do what the hospital says. But both my mom and I have a sense that there's other vague "stuff" we maybe should do, but we're not sure what.
Maybe insurance, care, and "the filing cabinet" cover everything.
I know there's a relatively recently updated will in there, which hopefully we won't need for many, many years. Is there other stuff like that(???), but relevant to right now, that we should take a fresh look at?
We're sort of just getting our bearings, and maybe there's nothing else to do.
posted by zeek321 at 1:22 PM on October 12, 2019
Maybe insurance, care, and "the filing cabinet" cover everything.
I know there's a relatively recently updated will in there, which hopefully we won't need for many, many years. Is there other stuff like that(???), but relevant to right now, that we should take a fresh look at?
We're sort of just getting our bearings, and maybe there's nothing else to do.
posted by zeek321 at 1:22 PM on October 12, 2019
Take care of yourselves, get plenty of sleep, visit the hospital often, rent a room nearby if you have to. Pay attention to the doctors, nurses, and medications. Ask questions.
He might go to rehab (or assisted living) afterwards. Start researching options near you. Sometimes those decisions catch you off-guard.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 1:40 PM on October 12, 2019 [4 favorites]
He might go to rehab (or assisted living) afterwards. Start researching options near you. Sometimes those decisions catch you off-guard.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 1:40 PM on October 12, 2019 [4 favorites]
Best answer: Before I had major emergency surgery, I made a 'filing cabinet' for various documents, which included my advance directive, power of attorney, revocable living trust, and will. These contain instructions for my wishes for medical care, decision-making in the event that I am not able to, and what I would want to have happen to my things if I didn't make it through my surgery. You can consult with an estate planning attorney to help understand the documents and how to interpret them, if they are in his filing cabinet.
The hospital may have a social worker available who can help coordinate and set up things like in-home care and/or visiting nurses for after discharge from the hospital, so that may also be something to look into. Based on my experience, I think it is important to be proactive in coordinating post-surgery care and the various rehabilitation services, like occupational therapy and physical therapy, that may be available.
posted by katra at 1:42 PM on October 12, 2019 [6 favorites]
The hospital may have a social worker available who can help coordinate and set up things like in-home care and/or visiting nurses for after discharge from the hospital, so that may also be something to look into. Based on my experience, I think it is important to be proactive in coordinating post-surgery care and the various rehabilitation services, like occupational therapy and physical therapy, that may be available.
posted by katra at 1:42 PM on October 12, 2019 [6 favorites]
Response by poster: Ok, answers like the one above, please, maybe. Or totally different. Still very watching this thread.
posted by zeek321 at 1:47 PM on October 12, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by zeek321 at 1:47 PM on October 12, 2019 [1 favorite]
Look into if a personal care attendant would be a good idea. The hospital social worker will probably have some good ideas.
posted by kerf at 2:02 PM on October 12, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by kerf at 2:02 PM on October 12, 2019 [1 favorite]
While they are in the hospital, whoever is with them should read up on being a patient advocate. This book helped me with my Mom’s hospitalizations:
The Patient's Playbook: How to Save Your Life and the Lives of Those You Love
If they will need long term care be sure to consult with a hospital social worker about available resources before they go home. When home, be sure to consult with their work HR about resources, or if they are retired, check out any supplemental insurance they have for home care. Otherwise just have someone keep an eye on the mail to catch bills as they come in, and get passwords to important online accounts like banking and credit cards if they use those to pay bills.
posted by drossdragon at 2:06 PM on October 12, 2019 [3 favorites]
The Patient's Playbook: How to Save Your Life and the Lives of Those You Love
If they will need long term care be sure to consult with a hospital social worker about available resources before they go home. When home, be sure to consult with their work HR about resources, or if they are retired, check out any supplemental insurance they have for home care. Otherwise just have someone keep an eye on the mail to catch bills as they come in, and get passwords to important online accounts like banking and credit cards if they use those to pay bills.
posted by drossdragon at 2:06 PM on October 12, 2019 [3 favorites]
Have a list of things to pull from when people say ‘let me know if you need anything.’
Things like
Fold laundry
Bring two roast beef sandwiches
Please come make the bathroom less of a pit of despair
Fill the car with gas
Bring $20 in laundry quarters
The things that make your every day life happen may fall by the wayside/be too tiresome to handle.
Things you should both do:
Get a flu shot now
Drink water
Wash your hands
Have someone go clean the house professionally
Order grocery delivery for whatever you think he’s going to want to eat. You can set a future delivery date and add items as you think of them.
posted by bilabial at 2:10 PM on October 12, 2019 [5 favorites]
Things like
Fold laundry
Bring two roast beef sandwiches
Please come make the bathroom less of a pit of despair
Fill the car with gas
Bring $20 in laundry quarters
The things that make your every day life happen may fall by the wayside/be too tiresome to handle.
Things you should both do:
Get a flu shot now
Drink water
Wash your hands
Have someone go clean the house professionally
Order grocery delivery for whatever you think he’s going to want to eat. You can set a future delivery date and add items as you think of them.
posted by bilabial at 2:10 PM on October 12, 2019 [5 favorites]
Get a notebook and a pen tied to it. Keep it at his bedside. Write down your/his questions for his doctors/caregivers, and write the answers down in it. Refer to it every time you see his doctors/lead caregivers. Likely as he become more stable, you will see less of the doctors, so it's important to have any questions/observations ready to go when they come in, instead of racking your brain for what you wanted to ask. It can also help you remember the answers if he/you are not able to keep it all straight. Encourage staff to write in it as well. It also may be helpful to document his progress, especially if it will be a slow recovery it can be good to be able to look back and see that last week he could only do '1 lap around the ward' but this week it's 3....or whatever the relevant milestones are.
Seconding get a flu shot. Invest in hand sanitizer. Invest in decent non-scented hand lotion. This will help him and you all stay healthy for the long haul.
Remember, this is likely a marathon, not a sprint! Pace yourself, and don't burn yourself out a as a caregiver.
posted by Northbysomewhatcrazy at 2:42 PM on October 12, 2019 [4 favorites]
Seconding get a flu shot. Invest in hand sanitizer. Invest in decent non-scented hand lotion. This will help him and you all stay healthy for the long haul.
Remember, this is likely a marathon, not a sprint! Pace yourself, and don't burn yourself out a as a caregiver.
posted by Northbysomewhatcrazy at 2:42 PM on October 12, 2019 [4 favorites]
When my dad was in the hospital following major surgery, we blithely assumed that the hospital would not let him go until he was ambulatory or somewhat functional, or that they would let us know that he was neither of those things, which did not happen. Hospitals want patients out of the building as soon as possible so they don't fall prey to secondary infections. I wish we had known this before we ended up in in full panic mode when we realized that my dad could not get out of the car, walk up the driveway, step over the threshold, or make it to the bathroom once we did manage to get him into the house. Have a plan for the transfer. Part of the problem was that older people lose muscle mass really quickly if they have to spend a lot of time in bed, and part of it was that my poor dad had developed a phobia around eating hospital food and refused to eat for most of a week. Lack of food seriously weakened him, to a degree that could have been very dangerous. Make sure he eats as well as he can, whether it's the hospital's food or something you bring in that his doctor okays.
We also figured out very quickly that we needed someone to come to the house to help with his basic care. None of us knew how to safely help him up or down, causing a lot of uh, high emotions for everyone involved. He also could not make it all the way to the bathroom from the bed and having professional help made the emotional turmoil of needing a bedside commode a bit better for him. Start calling around now for help, even if it's just someone for the first night back from the hospital, even if it's just to find out what agencies in your area charge.
You might need durable medical equipment such as the aforementioned commode, a shower chair, or a walker. One hospital was helpful with suggestions, one was not. YMMV.
If he's being discharged on a Sunday or a holiday, know that it might take extra time because sometimes hospitals are not fully staffed on those days. I think our record was four hours. We eventually learned to not get him dressed and into the wheelchair until the final paperwork was done.
And take care of yourselves. Waiting at the hospital brings a certain level of almost indescribable exhaustion. If people ask to help, take them up on it. Bilabial's list is great. If you have a gregarious friend who feels like coordinating such things, take them up on that as well. Best wishes to you all.
posted by corey flood at 2:46 PM on October 12, 2019 [4 favorites]
We also figured out very quickly that we needed someone to come to the house to help with his basic care. None of us knew how to safely help him up or down, causing a lot of uh, high emotions for everyone involved. He also could not make it all the way to the bathroom from the bed and having professional help made the emotional turmoil of needing a bedside commode a bit better for him. Start calling around now for help, even if it's just someone for the first night back from the hospital, even if it's just to find out what agencies in your area charge.
You might need durable medical equipment such as the aforementioned commode, a shower chair, or a walker. One hospital was helpful with suggestions, one was not. YMMV.
If he's being discharged on a Sunday or a holiday, know that it might take extra time because sometimes hospitals are not fully staffed on those days. I think our record was four hours. We eventually learned to not get him dressed and into the wheelchair until the final paperwork was done.
And take care of yourselves. Waiting at the hospital brings a certain level of almost indescribable exhaustion. If people ask to help, take them up on it. Bilabial's list is great. If you have a gregarious friend who feels like coordinating such things, take them up on that as well. Best wishes to you all.
posted by corey flood at 2:46 PM on October 12, 2019 [4 favorites]
A social worker or visiting nurse would know this, but before your dad comes home be sure to evaluate your surrounding for fall risks. Something that wouldn't be a problem to a healthy active adult can be a serious hazard to someone in recovery. For instance, uneven carpet, loose rugs, uneven porch steps or lack of railings, objects left in walk ways, poor lighting, etc.
Here is a guide I found from a simple Google search.
posted by forthright at 3:30 PM on October 12, 2019 [2 favorites]
Here is a guide I found from a simple Google search.
posted by forthright at 3:30 PM on October 12, 2019 [2 favorites]
I know the person who makes this, for end of life and emergency planning. I've never used her product nor actually seen it (and have no financial interest), but I can vouch that she's the person she says she is, and from my past interactions with her it's likely to be thorough and worth it. She's Chicago based, if that helps.
posted by true at 3:33 PM on October 12, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by true at 3:33 PM on October 12, 2019 [1 favorite]
My husband was on short-term disability earlier this year, due to a hospitalization (due to a bad infection and sepsis, so he had to be out for 4 weeks).
His supervisor emailed him PDF documents relating to his short-term disability insurance, and my husband had to contact that company (Prudential) via email and/or phone, retroactively, when he got out of the hospital.
He then had to contact his providing care doctor and get them to fill out a form and fax it to Prudential (who had faxed it over to the doctor first). I made a note of all the info:
Prudential: 1-800 (their toll-free number)
Control Number: 12345
Employee ID or SSN (fill it in)
Reason for Absence (surgery for XYZ)
First date (when it happened)
Absent on what days (first day happened)
Work schedule (M-F 9-5, etc)
Date expected to return to work (make it as long out as possible, my husband returned to work too early, had to go home and take another week or two off, resulting in a 2nd short-term disability claim, ugh, just a few more hoops that we didn't need, I had TOLD him he shouldn't go back too early, thankfully his supervisor said she'd seen it before and sent him home before noon and said to take more time off)
Doctor name: (fill it in)
Telephone of Doctor:
Fax of Doctor: (fill it in -- this always stymied my husband, so I had this little paper to tell him to tell the Prudential Short-Term Disability folks)
They sent a lot of letters and some were confusing, saying his absence didn't apply to the something act, and it sounded like they had not approved him, but they did, it was just not for whatever that was... I found out how to go online and look it up on their website, as he was recovering from sepsis, so... yeah.
Since I am his spouse, I can probably talk to people, but it's best to make sure he has a medical power of attorney, as we did for his dad when we were taking care of him, and also a financial power of attorney, in case a bill has to be paid that he has to sign for (such as my FIL's mortgage or his lawn mower guy, might not apply in your case). But having us as Medical POA made it so much easier to talk to people on my FIL's behalf.
So if he has Short Term Disability insurance, you need to contact his boss and/or HR at his work and find out how to file a claim. Then you need to get them to fax the info to his doctor, have the doctor fill out the form, and fax it back (yes, I know, people still use the fax, I didn't know either, maybe yours won't, who knows?). If it needs to be extended, you will have to file a new claim to do that, so he will still get paid.
If you can get him to sign a Medical POA while he's lucid, do that, get his lawyer there and do that. Financial POA may not be necessary if your Mom is involved, if she is out of the picture, get an attorney involved ASAP, as someone said above. My FIL was a widower, and he had gone to the lawyer prior to his severe health issues and we had Medical POA and my husband's brother financial POA. Which didn't matter until he was really far gone with his heart disease, which we all knew was coming, eventually (heart failure).
Sorry you are going thru this, I know it's stressful, but if you think he is going to be functional at all in the near future, apply for the Short Term Disability. And get an attorney involved, see if he has one who has done the work already, hence, the file cabinet.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 3:57 PM on October 12, 2019 [1 favorite]
His supervisor emailed him PDF documents relating to his short-term disability insurance, and my husband had to contact that company (Prudential) via email and/or phone, retroactively, when he got out of the hospital.
He then had to contact his providing care doctor and get them to fill out a form and fax it to Prudential (who had faxed it over to the doctor first). I made a note of all the info:
Prudential: 1-800 (their toll-free number)
Control Number: 12345
Employee ID or SSN (fill it in)
Reason for Absence (surgery for XYZ)
First date (when it happened)
Absent on what days (first day happened)
Work schedule (M-F 9-5, etc)
Date expected to return to work (make it as long out as possible, my husband returned to work too early, had to go home and take another week or two off, resulting in a 2nd short-term disability claim, ugh, just a few more hoops that we didn't need, I had TOLD him he shouldn't go back too early, thankfully his supervisor said she'd seen it before and sent him home before noon and said to take more time off)
Doctor name: (fill it in)
Telephone of Doctor:
Fax of Doctor: (fill it in -- this always stymied my husband, so I had this little paper to tell him to tell the Prudential Short-Term Disability folks)
They sent a lot of letters and some were confusing, saying his absence didn't apply to the something act, and it sounded like they had not approved him, but they did, it was just not for whatever that was... I found out how to go online and look it up on their website, as he was recovering from sepsis, so... yeah.
Since I am his spouse, I can probably talk to people, but it's best to make sure he has a medical power of attorney, as we did for his dad when we were taking care of him, and also a financial power of attorney, in case a bill has to be paid that he has to sign for (such as my FIL's mortgage or his lawn mower guy, might not apply in your case). But having us as Medical POA made it so much easier to talk to people on my FIL's behalf.
So if he has Short Term Disability insurance, you need to contact his boss and/or HR at his work and find out how to file a claim. Then you need to get them to fax the info to his doctor, have the doctor fill out the form, and fax it back (yes, I know, people still use the fax, I didn't know either, maybe yours won't, who knows?). If it needs to be extended, you will have to file a new claim to do that, so he will still get paid.
If you can get him to sign a Medical POA while he's lucid, do that, get his lawyer there and do that. Financial POA may not be necessary if your Mom is involved, if she is out of the picture, get an attorney involved ASAP, as someone said above. My FIL was a widower, and he had gone to the lawyer prior to his severe health issues and we had Medical POA and my husband's brother financial POA. Which didn't matter until he was really far gone with his heart disease, which we all knew was coming, eventually (heart failure).
Sorry you are going thru this, I know it's stressful, but if you think he is going to be functional at all in the near future, apply for the Short Term Disability. And get an attorney involved, see if he has one who has done the work already, hence, the file cabinet.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 3:57 PM on October 12, 2019 [1 favorite]
If he is going straight home, what support will he need? This is a good question to ask multiple people, since there may be multiple people coordinating his care who each have things on their list that may not overlap perfectly with others.
Does your mom have other support people to support her as she helps her husband through his long low recovery? Do you? Are there a lot of people flitting around that want to help, where emailing them all and asking them to coordinate a meal train would be helpful?
Kinds of physical things you may or may not need based on family members who have recovered fully from similarly-serious illness: Mobility devices, special bed or chair, special toilet seat or bath/shower seat, bedpan, adult continence products, equipment for measuring any combination of blood pressure/O2 levels/blood sugar/lung capacity, pill caddy and detailed schedule for the seriously dizzying array of medications he may be taking, detailed list of dietary restrictions, detailed description of wound and IV care. Some of these things, you might be able to outsource to other family members who are not local and want to help (i.e. "can you find the best raised toilet seat under 100$ on Amazon and send it to dad's house? Can you find the local medical equipment place and ask them how much it costs per week to rent an adjustable bed?" that kind of thing.)
If he's someone who is likely to tough things out, be specific about asking what he is allowed to lift, and how high, and what he needs to do for bathroom/showering needs, and what exercise he's permitted to do, and what movements related to any hobbies he enjoys are likely to be difficult or impossible. Ask about likely long-term effects; I've had family members go back to the hospital based on a poor understanding of the permanent changes to their body.
posted by tchemgrrl at 5:09 PM on October 12, 2019
Does your mom have other support people to support her as she helps her husband through his long low recovery? Do you? Are there a lot of people flitting around that want to help, where emailing them all and asking them to coordinate a meal train would be helpful?
Kinds of physical things you may or may not need based on family members who have recovered fully from similarly-serious illness: Mobility devices, special bed or chair, special toilet seat or bath/shower seat, bedpan, adult continence products, equipment for measuring any combination of blood pressure/O2 levels/blood sugar/lung capacity, pill caddy and detailed schedule for the seriously dizzying array of medications he may be taking, detailed list of dietary restrictions, detailed description of wound and IV care. Some of these things, you might be able to outsource to other family members who are not local and want to help (i.e. "can you find the best raised toilet seat under 100$ on Amazon and send it to dad's house? Can you find the local medical equipment place and ask them how much it costs per week to rent an adjustable bed?" that kind of thing.)
If he's someone who is likely to tough things out, be specific about asking what he is allowed to lift, and how high, and what he needs to do for bathroom/showering needs, and what exercise he's permitted to do, and what movements related to any hobbies he enjoys are likely to be difficult or impossible. Ask about likely long-term effects; I've had family members go back to the hospital based on a poor understanding of the permanent changes to their body.
posted by tchemgrrl at 5:09 PM on October 12, 2019
Best answer: Hi, I'm a nurse, I work in hospital discharge planning and I used to be a field nurse in home health.
The hospital will want to discharge your dad as soon as it's safe to do so. There are different levels of care he could go to afterwards: Skilled Nursing Facility, Acute Rehab, or home with Home Health services. Where he goes will depend partly on his doctors and partly on the physical/occupational therapy evaluations. Medically, he might leave the hospital with something like a surgical drain, a urinary catheter, or a PICC line for long-term IV antibiotics.
If the recommendation is for him to go home -- and he could go home with the drain/catheter/PICC -- you need to know that they will expect a lot from his family. Home Health services, as covered under his insurance, are limited. Typically he'd get 2 visits a week from a nurse, and 2 visits a week from physical and occupational therapists. This would last for 3-6 weeks, depending on how his recovery is progressing.
What he'll also need for the first few weeks at home is help with personal care -- bathing, toileting, dressing, food prep, getting out to appointments, and so on. Help for these things is typically *not* covered by insurance. Aides can be hired; rates in most US cities are $20-$25 per hour.
If that is more than your family can pay for - well, then, it's down to family to make sure someone is with him to help him with what he needs. This is a tough thing to manage if all the local adults work during the day. Heck, it's a tough thing to manage, period.
There may only be a day or two for the discharge arrangements to come together. Hospitals are under a lot of pressure to keep the length of stay as short as possible. Your family will probably be asked to make decisions quickly. It's OK to tell them you need time to check out rehab facilities or hire home health aides, but that will get you maybe an extra day. Once his medical team says he's medically ready for discharge, they're going to push to get him out.
Sending all best wishes for his recovery. Please feel free to reach out to me if you have questions!
posted by shiny blue object at 5:12 PM on October 12, 2019 [1 favorite]
The hospital will want to discharge your dad as soon as it's safe to do so. There are different levels of care he could go to afterwards: Skilled Nursing Facility, Acute Rehab, or home with Home Health services. Where he goes will depend partly on his doctors and partly on the physical/occupational therapy evaluations. Medically, he might leave the hospital with something like a surgical drain, a urinary catheter, or a PICC line for long-term IV antibiotics.
If the recommendation is for him to go home -- and he could go home with the drain/catheter/PICC -- you need to know that they will expect a lot from his family. Home Health services, as covered under his insurance, are limited. Typically he'd get 2 visits a week from a nurse, and 2 visits a week from physical and occupational therapists. This would last for 3-6 weeks, depending on how his recovery is progressing.
What he'll also need for the first few weeks at home is help with personal care -- bathing, toileting, dressing, food prep, getting out to appointments, and so on. Help for these things is typically *not* covered by insurance. Aides can be hired; rates in most US cities are $20-$25 per hour.
If that is more than your family can pay for - well, then, it's down to family to make sure someone is with him to help him with what he needs. This is a tough thing to manage if all the local adults work during the day. Heck, it's a tough thing to manage, period.
There may only be a day or two for the discharge arrangements to come together. Hospitals are under a lot of pressure to keep the length of stay as short as possible. Your family will probably be asked to make decisions quickly. It's OK to tell them you need time to check out rehab facilities or hire home health aides, but that will get you maybe an extra day. Once his medical team says he's medically ready for discharge, they're going to push to get him out.
Sending all best wishes for his recovery. Please feel free to reach out to me if you have questions!
posted by shiny blue object at 5:12 PM on October 12, 2019 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Thank you very much, everyone. Reading all of it.
posted by zeek321 at 5:34 PM on October 12, 2019
posted by zeek321 at 5:34 PM on October 12, 2019
Be sure the monthly bills are paid! Your mother is likely very involved in this, but if not, be sure that the everyday stuff that needs to be taken care of is taken care of.
posted by lhauser at 5:46 PM on October 12, 2019
posted by lhauser at 5:46 PM on October 12, 2019
If he comes home and still needs a lot of help, renting a hospital bed that can raise up and down will make getting up and down easier. Try doing a search for "medical equipment rental or home health rental" to find places near you. If he needs help standing up, ask a nurse to teach you how to help. Have them show you how to use a lift belt if he weighs much more than you. This is something I learned after my mom had a compression fracture which would have been really helpful to know in advance. Hope your dad doesn't need that much help but at least you can have an idea of what to look for.
posted by stray thoughts at 5:51 PM on October 12, 2019
posted by stray thoughts at 5:51 PM on October 12, 2019
Best answer: Echoing he will leave faster than expected and in worse shape than expected, hospitals are literally for the medical stabilization and nothing else.
If you know anybody that works in the local area different levels of care call them now. If there is a nursing home you are interested in check it out today.
IL has really good home based community services, through IDOA (il dept of aging) if he is over 60, it's DORs if he is under if he is eligible ... The income requirements are higher than medicaid so he may actually qualify with some income (it's not a lot though)
You'll be able to stall for a day or two at the hospital with persiatance, but once all the medical recommendations are in you'll need to make a choice regarding providers for home or care very very quickly. They are required to give you a choice of at least three providers (for each thing! ) insist DME (durible medical equipment) is in hand prior to discharge. Have PT go over any assistance you will be providing with you before you leave. It's hard work, make sure you know what you are doing now.
Elder care attorneys are a thing and may be needed in you're situation if you end up looking at long term care, and you need to figure out how to get qualified for medicaid and spending down assets.
posted by AlexiaSky at 7:59 AM on October 13, 2019 [2 favorites]
If you know anybody that works in the local area different levels of care call them now. If there is a nursing home you are interested in check it out today.
IL has really good home based community services, through IDOA (il dept of aging) if he is over 60, it's DORs if he is under if he is eligible ... The income requirements are higher than medicaid so he may actually qualify with some income (it's not a lot though)
You'll be able to stall for a day or two at the hospital with persiatance, but once all the medical recommendations are in you'll need to make a choice regarding providers for home or care very very quickly. They are required to give you a choice of at least three providers (for each thing! ) insist DME (durible medical equipment) is in hand prior to discharge. Have PT go over any assistance you will be providing with you before you leave. It's hard work, make sure you know what you are doing now.
Elder care attorneys are a thing and may be needed in you're situation if you end up looking at long term care, and you need to figure out how to get qualified for medicaid and spending down assets.
posted by AlexiaSky at 7:59 AM on October 13, 2019 [2 favorites]
You can ask today how long they think he will stay and what level of care they will recommend. You can also ask to speak now (or Monday) to the person that will be doing the discharge planing in to find out what they know and how they can help. The answers might change but it will give you an idea of where you stand. My guess if he is nonfunctional and facing a slow recovery that they will probably refer him to a skilled nursing facility. If there are several in your area, now is the time to figure out which one you want and then make sure the discharge planner knows. Sometimes the timing can be a little tricky making sure there is a bed available when needed - getting people to talk to each other a day or two in advance can help make that work. That will also buy you time to figure out what is next.
Also, if you are concerned that he is not stable when they talk about discharge, but sure to speak up. Frame it as a concern that something could go badly that would need hospital level care. You can also sometime get an extra day if things are not ready at home (eg key caregiver is out of town but coming back soon or durable equipment hasn't been delivered yet)
posted by metahawk at 3:37 PM on October 13, 2019
Also, if you are concerned that he is not stable when they talk about discharge, but sure to speak up. Frame it as a concern that something could go badly that would need hospital level care. You can also sometime get an extra day if things are not ready at home (eg key caregiver is out of town but coming back soon or durable equipment hasn't been delivered yet)
posted by metahawk at 3:37 PM on October 13, 2019
« Older Mum threatening to divorce my 75yr old dad | Difference in emotional maturity when dating Newer »
This thread is closed to new comments.
Can you be a bit more specific so you can get better help?
posted by DarlingBri at 1:14 PM on October 12, 2019