Got Ass?

February 22, 2006 7:23 PM

Is it OK to read girls shorts that have a word or two in big letters across the butt?

It's almost impossible not to, but I'm guessing that a glance is really only allowed for the young and glistening and handsome and not the pasty, old, and creepy (like me). How hard should I be trying to make my eyes behave?

posted by BruceL to human relations (49 comments total)

I think its acceptable if done discretely and not in the company of your significant other/date.
posted by mhuckaba at 7:26 PM on February 22, 2006

I don't think it should be a problem unless you are an incredibly slow reader.

And even then, it isn't there for the wearer to read it right?
posted by skinnydipp at 7:29 PM on February 22, 2006

Isn't that the intention?
posted by kickingtheground at 7:31 PM on February 22, 2006

I'm a girl, and while I don't wear those pants, I say the girls who do are asking for it. Words! On your ass! Why would they be there if not to read? I say go ahead.
posted by viachicago at 7:32 PM on February 22, 2006

Seconded. It's like asking "If a very large-breasted woman is wearing a very low-cut top that shows acres of cleavage, am I a pervert for looking?" She may not be attracted to you, but she chose those shorts so people will read her ass.
posted by middleclasstool at 7:34 PM on February 22, 2006

Aside: my college's mascot is Jumbo the Elephant, so we have shorts that say JUMBO across the ass. (And shirts, for that matter.)
posted by danb at 7:36 PM on February 22, 2006

I think its acceptable if done discretely and not in the company of your significant other/date.

Are you joking?

Go for it. That's why the words are there. And of your SO has a problem with that, uh... get a new one ;)
posted by BorgLove at 7:36 PM on February 22, 2006

Yes, but read silently. Outloud and you're a pervert.
posted by peppermint22 at 7:42 PM on February 22, 2006

People who wear words on themselves have no business complaining when other people read them. Even pasty, aging, and creepy members of the opposite sex.
posted by IshmaelGraves at 7:45 PM on February 22, 2006

My rule for this is read and linger. With the following caveats:

1) No following along with your finger.

2) No more than a glance if they're walking with a much older guy and the shorts say

(I'M)(14)
posted by crabintheocean at 7:52 PM on February 22, 2006

My sister is on the equestrian team at college and she has a pair of sweatpants with "RIDE THIS" across the bottom. I asked her this question and her response was "Well why the hell else would I have words on my ass?"
posted by Loto at 7:53 PM on February 22, 2006

I had exact this same conversation earlier tonight! Walking with a friend, I turned to read the butt of a girl wearing green lounge pants with a word on them. The word was PINK. Puzzled, I paused for a second, while my (male) friend sarcastically praised me for being so discrete.

We both agreed that words on the butt, or across the chest, are meant to be read, and wearers who object are just looking to be critical.

Aside: My brother was on at a high school convention once where his (female) teacher noticed another attendee's shorts and asked aloud, "Does her butt really say, 'Hit it in the back!'?"
posted by SuperNova at 7:54 PM on February 22, 2006

A few years ago I saw the big words "HOTTIE" on the ass side of a 10-year old girl's shorts at a supermarket parking lot. That just screams for every pervert and lecher to look. So go for it... this is carte blanche.
posted by chef_boyardee at 8:01 PM on February 22, 2006

Agree with the consensus -- it's perfectly normal to look at and read the words and try to figure out WTF the intent is...with the standard caveat that if the female in question *appears* to be underage, then don't even try to sneak a glance.

Question: if males started wearing pants that had similar expressions posted on the FRONT, what would the reaction be? Would such males be hung out to dry for being sexist bastards?
posted by davidmsc at 8:09 PM on February 22, 2006

Here in South Carolina, after the first couple sightings you don't have to even stop and read anymore, because all the asses say COCKS. Not joking.
posted by climalene at 8:09 PM on February 22, 2006

Indeed, climalene. Hey neighbor! *waves*
posted by chiababe at 8:18 PM on February 22, 2006

I don't see that many pairs of shorts with writing on them, interestingly. And, if I do, then I don't feel guilty about reading the words, because surely I'm looking at her from behind and she doesn't know.

But I do sometimes have problems with t-shirts with lettering on them.

* t-shirts often have very amusing things on them. Reading them can be quite rewarding.
* I'm rather short-sighted.
* I'm the kind of guy who reads everything my eye falls upon, no matter how dull.
* the, er, contours of some people's t-shirts make reading harder than on a flat surface.
posted by AmbroseChapel at 8:18 PM on February 22, 2006

Dont listen to all the "soft" people who say its not OK. If they didnt want people reading whats on their ass, they shouldnt have bought them. Stare no matter how young they are. Fuck it.
posted by deeman at 8:36 PM on February 22, 2006

At OKState, our mascot is/are the cowboys, also known as "Pokes". So yeah, there are a lot of girls around here with Pokes written on their bums.
posted by idiotfactory at 8:45 PM on February 22, 2006

Before I was old enough to understand designer brands, I always thought that girls wearing shirts that read GUESS across their chest were inviting others to make an estimate of their cup size.
posted by Mach3avelli at 8:49 PM on February 22, 2006

Oh, and it's the same principle as revealing tops. A girl once caught me staring at her chest (which looked like two whales trying to beach themselves) and gave me a dirty look. Unashamed, I smiled and told her, "Hey, if I didn't want people to check out my car I wouldn't park it out on the street," and walked away. Her small-breasted, (likely) jealous friend laughed.
posted by Mach3avelli at 8:54 PM on February 22, 2006

Clearly someone needs to design some green ass-print shorts that say ASK ME.

Hi, chiababe! It's raining like a motherfucker, no?
posted by climalene at 9:00 PM on February 22, 2006

I'm a girl, and while I don't wear those pants, I say the girls who do are asking for it. Words! On your ass! Why would they be there if not to read? I say go ahead.

Agreed.
posted by nuclear_soup at 9:29 PM on February 22, 2006

I saw a girl walk by with "Pink Tacos" emblazened on her ass, and I couldn't not look. File under: What did you think was going to happen?
posted by Space Kitty at 9:45 PM on February 22, 2006

I went to a restuarant in Cuba where all the female staff had their names written across their asses in this fashion.
In this case I don't believe that they had any choice in the matter.
posted by asok at 10:59 PM on February 22, 2006

Go for it. That's why the words are there. And of your SO has a problem with that, uh... get a new one ;)
posted by BorgLove at 7:36 PM PST on February 22 [!]

Eponysterical. If only you'd shown up to this thread.
posted by duende at 12:22 AM on February 23, 2006

Are you asking if it's Ok to read, or if it's a blank check to oggle fine young asses? If you are implying they are the same, then you are mistaken. 'Yes' to the former, 'no' to the latter.
posted by dgaicun at 12:42 AM on February 23, 2006

This style of shorts were ubiquitious while I was at UNC a few years ago; the university bookstore marketed them prominently, along with female t-shirts that read "Best in the world." I sometimes wondered if the anyone in the administration cared that they were objectifying their female students, but evidently my concerns were not widely shared.
posted by gsteff at 12:58 AM on February 23, 2006

A good friend of mine once gained himself a girlfriend by reading her 'phone number embroidered into the seat of her jeans and calling her while they were both on the same train...
posted by benzo8 at 1:01 AM on February 23, 2006

Are you asking if it's Ok to read, or if it's a blank check to oggle fine young asses? If you are implying they are the same, then you are mistaken. 'Yes' to the former, 'no' to the latter.

Well, maybe I'm the only one, but a quick ogle piggybacks a quick read purely due to FOV. I always figured that was mostly the point of the shorts, and it sounds like MeFi agrees.

So, no lingering and no braille. Otherwise, I'm good. Thanks MeFI, your answers bring me peace.
posted by BruceL at 4:13 AM on February 23, 2006

Is it OK to read girls shorts that have a word or two in big letters across the butt?

Yes your Holiness.
posted by hardcode at 4:28 AM on February 23, 2006

Next : how to read wordy t-shirts worn by nicely-breasted women without looking like a pervert ?

yes, 'keep your mouth closed', i guessed that
posted by XiBe at 5:12 AM on February 23, 2006

I hope so. I couldn't stop myself if it wasn't.
posted by NinjaPirate at 5:44 AM on February 23, 2006

Yes.
posted by OmieWise at 6:12 AM on February 23, 2006

> if the female in question *appears* to be underage,
> then don't even try to sneak a glance.

No way.
That's the politically-correct answer.

There's nothing wrong with checking out a girl of 17, 16, 15, whatever. It's just looking. It's natural for guys to look and perhaps even have some dirty thoughts (that's hardwired into us by nature). It's acting upon that which becomes a problem (that's fitting into societal norms).

Anyway, I thought I'd throw in a random observation....

Last September, I had the opportunity to go to the Middle East, specifically to Jordan. Here in the U.S., our stereotype is that they all wear hajibs or veils, but, surprisingly, the younger generation there is very, very Americanized, so much so that our Jordanian liaison (26 years old, born and raised in Amman) frequently wore outfits with these messages. The first day we met her, she was wearing hot pink pants that said Baby Girl across the back.
posted by stst399 at 6:33 AM on February 23, 2006

The Catholic Church says it is acceptable as long as you don't have impure thoughts.
posted by JJ86 at 6:37 AM on February 23, 2006

A couple days ago I saw a girl with the word PINK written across her butt like SuperNova has mentioned. I was at the gym yesterday, and a college-aged girl had sweatpants on with Psychology written across the butt. That has to be the most interesting buttword I have seen to date.

This thread makes me think of "Doin' the Butt" by EU:

Your butt
Your butt
I think I'll keep my mouth shut
posted by Fat Guy at 7:16 AM on February 23, 2006

I noticed a lot of girls wearing these pants at the Catholic church we used to attend. If you were kneeling after communion their butts were right at eye-level as they went up the aisle. I wonder what the priest thought as the young woman to whom he'd just administered the body of Christ turned around and walked down the aisle with her ass proclaiming "brat" or "hottie" or, no lie, "goddess."
posted by Biblio at 7:29 AM on February 23, 2006

As long as you look her in the eyes when she's talking.
posted by unknowncommand at 7:46 AM on February 23, 2006

I wonder if any CafePress-type site sells these shorts. I kind of want to get someone GOETHE ass-pants now.
posted by danb at 7:55 AM on February 23, 2006

Whether there is one word written on each discrete bum cheek, or a word or phrase that spans both, the very wearing of the item is by no means discreet.
Any time a person wears text, there is an implicit expectation that the text will be read, no matter what the person's body type and no matter where the text is located.

That said, I don't think it is fair of commenters to say that buxom women are making the same kind of request for attention by wearing a low-cut top.
Unless, of course, there's writing on it.
posted by Sprout the Vulgarian at 8:30 AM on February 23, 2006

Eponysterical.

Damn if that ain't the coolest word I've never heard of.
posted by BorgLove at 9:05 AM on February 23, 2006

Wait, if it's on their butt, how could they see you looking anyway? That's the whole thing about butts!

Unless she's looking over her shoulder coyly, as if to say, "are you reading my butt? Don't think I didn't notice, you cheeky devil!"
posted by Hildago at 9:08 AM on February 23, 2006

Whenever I see women walking around with 'Pink' written on their ass, I always wonder if someone from the Church of the SubGenius works for Victoria's Secret.
posted by haqspan at 10:55 AM on February 23, 2006

In Rimini, Italy a couple of summers ago, a remarkably attractive woman was wearing a pair of pants with the words "Touch Me" across the butt.

Yes, I was tempted. No, I did not.
posted by cactus at 9:13 PM on February 23, 2006

I don't really get the question. If someone has a word on their butt, it draws your eye, and you automatically 'read the word. So, no, there's no problem with reading the shorts, it's a reflex reaction if your line of vision happens to be down there.

Making assumptions, however, of the person wearing the item, is unfair. It's just a stupid trend.
posted by Radio7 at 3:10 AM on February 24, 2006

I had exact this same conversation earlier tonight! Walking with a friend, I turned to read the butt of a girl wearing green lounge pants with a word on them. The word was PINK. Puzzled, I paused for a second, while my (male) friend sarcastically praised me for being so discrete.

Not related: those are from Victoria's Secret. Their line of cottony/loungy lingerie and sweats is called "Pink."

And yes, if a girl is dumb enough to put words on her ass (all too common with Tulane sorority girls) she deserves people staring.
posted by radioamy at 3:07 PM on February 26, 2006

Worded or wordless ALL butts are fair game in my opinion.
posted by mike_bling at 1:27 PM on March 5, 2006

...That has to be the most interesting buttword I have seen to date.

posted by Fat Guy at 9:16 AM CST on February 23 [!]

Metafilter: the most interesting buttword I have seen to date.
posted by Jonasio at 10:52 AM on March 14, 2006