How can I get better at following verbal and visual directions?
October 16, 2018 5:25 PM Subscribe
I'm dismal in fitness/dance classes and always have been. My lifelong inability to follow along with someone teaching me a specific movement has been gnawing at me. I love dancing, yoga, etc but need a lot of repetition to learn any new move and find myself embarrassed and frustrated in front of a class of people watching me mess up again and again even if a move is demonstrated over and over. This happens to me in yoga classes, weightlifting, circuit training, dance classes, etc. How can I get better at following along?
I have a hard time getting my body to do what someone is instructing me to do aloud if they're standing in front of me and an even harder time doing it if they're demonstrating it at the same time. I'm better at following written diagrams and I'm definitely a solo learner but alas, I love group fitness. Many folks have assured me that I can't possibly be that bad and then gone to a class with me and had to gently admit that yes, I am that bad. If I went to a Zumba class I believe I would end up knocking people down trying to follow along.
It's somewhat better if the instructor is facing away so I don't have to do an across the body translation for the movement but even then if there is more than one step I'll lose track very quickly. It's like something goes haywire in my brain and I start doing the opposite of what is being instructed.
I'm taking classes appropriate for my fitness level and they're always body positive, it's okay-to-fail situations but it feels awful to see everyone nail a move in one go and need the instructor to pay me special attention while everyone waits. This weekend I was at an event with a portion where we learned a simple burlesque routine and after an hour of practicing as a group I still couldn't step forward with the correct leg, move my hip in the correct direction, and alternate, and I couldn't repeat the short routine without watching someone else.
It feels like everyone else has some kind of key that I don't have. Is there a key?
I have a hard time getting my body to do what someone is instructing me to do aloud if they're standing in front of me and an even harder time doing it if they're demonstrating it at the same time. I'm better at following written diagrams and I'm definitely a solo learner but alas, I love group fitness. Many folks have assured me that I can't possibly be that bad and then gone to a class with me and had to gently admit that yes, I am that bad. If I went to a Zumba class I believe I would end up knocking people down trying to follow along.
It's somewhat better if the instructor is facing away so I don't have to do an across the body translation for the movement but even then if there is more than one step I'll lose track very quickly. It's like something goes haywire in my brain and I start doing the opposite of what is being instructed.
I'm taking classes appropriate for my fitness level and they're always body positive, it's okay-to-fail situations but it feels awful to see everyone nail a move in one go and need the instructor to pay me special attention while everyone waits. This weekend I was at an event with a portion where we learned a simple burlesque routine and after an hour of practicing as a group I still couldn't step forward with the correct leg, move my hip in the correct direction, and alternate, and I couldn't repeat the short routine without watching someone else.
It feels like everyone else has some kind of key that I don't have. Is there a key?
There is a key and I don't have it either. It's unconscious, it's in their brains. They didn't do anything special to have the key. Not having it Is not your fault, it's just the body equivalent of dyslexia.
The only way to feel better is to not give a shit. You're not performing in a show -- it's a class for you. Tell the teacher in advance that you have trouble picking up moves and you just want to enjoy yourself and get the exercise. Then just do whatever you can do. If they all step forward with their left foot and you with your right, it's OK! You can correct when you notice it. Or not. It's your class and you should enjoy moving with other people and music. Period.
posted by nantucket at 5:42 PM on October 16, 2018 [7 favorites]
The only way to feel better is to not give a shit. You're not performing in a show -- it's a class for you. Tell the teacher in advance that you have trouble picking up moves and you just want to enjoy yourself and get the exercise. Then just do whatever you can do. If they all step forward with their left foot and you with your right, it's OK! You can correct when you notice it. Or not. It's your class and you should enjoy moving with other people and music. Period.
posted by nantucket at 5:42 PM on October 16, 2018 [7 favorites]
I had a similar problem when I started learning to dance. What helped me get better was improving my kinaesthetic awareness. I spent a lot of time in front of a mirror in order to associate specific physical positions and motions with my inner sense (stuff like "this is what it feels like to have my arm straight out to the side," "this is what it feels like to have my arm at a 45 degree angle to the floor," "what just felt like me moving my rib cage was actually moving my shoulder").
As my kinaesthetic awareness improved, I found that I could mimic movements a lot better. I'm still not the best in my class, but I'm good enough that I get compliments from instructors in other styles of dance that are seeing me move for the first time.
The good news is that this is a skill that leads to a virtuous cycle: as you get better at recognizing what it feels like when your body moves in a certain way, you get better at making new movements, and when you make those new movements you can quickly learn "and that's how it feels when I do this new thing." Now, that does mean that right now you're at your weakest, but keep telling yourself that it's only going to get better from here.
posted by philosophygeek at 5:47 PM on October 16, 2018 [15 favorites]
As my kinaesthetic awareness improved, I found that I could mimic movements a lot better. I'm still not the best in my class, but I'm good enough that I get compliments from instructors in other styles of dance that are seeing me move for the first time.
The good news is that this is a skill that leads to a virtuous cycle: as you get better at recognizing what it feels like when your body moves in a certain way, you get better at making new movements, and when you make those new movements you can quickly learn "and that's how it feels when I do this new thing." Now, that does mean that right now you're at your weakest, but keep telling yourself that it's only going to get better from here.
posted by philosophygeek at 5:47 PM on October 16, 2018 [15 favorites]
Just keep going is the short answer.
The long answer is do activities and exercises that increase your proprioception.
posted by warriorqueen at 6:00 PM on October 16, 2018 [2 favorites]
The long answer is do activities and exercises that increase your proprioception.
posted by warriorqueen at 6:00 PM on October 16, 2018 [2 favorites]
Would doing home aerobics and anything where you're following an instructor help? Like following youtube dance tutorials? This could give you the opportunity to practice following along without the pressure or embarrassment of holding up a class. You can repeat as often as you need to. It may help you to better develop skills in mirroring others or remembering dance combinations better.
posted by acidnova at 6:37 PM on October 16, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by acidnova at 6:37 PM on October 16, 2018 [4 favorites]
Do you go to a series of classes, or do you kind of just try whatever strikes your fancy?
The reason I'm asking is that some of this is just familiarity with a certain set of basic moves, which gives you a solid foundation for other things that you add on top of that. For example, if you go to Zumba regularly, then you will probably recognize a merengue or cumbia step, or shoulder shimmies used repeatedly. One thing that would help is going to the same class over and over again (same instructor would be even better) so you slowly build up a familiarity with the basic steps and also the teacher's style of prompting you what will happen next.
Outside of class, try to watch videos and then break down the sequences into their component steps. Focus on 8 or 16 counts of music and just watch it repeatedly until you can:
- name each component step that makes up the sequence (e.g. cumbia, clap, and shoulder shimmy)
- call out the steps in the correct order (e.g. cumbia, cumbia, shoulder shimmy, clap clap, repeat)
- do each component step once you know its name (meaning when you hear/say cumbia, you know what to do, and you don't confuse it with other things)
- do each component step in the correct order
- see and confirm you are doing the right thing when you look at yourself in the mirror
- confirm you are doing the right thing just by feeling your movements in your own body
That sounds like a lot of work, I know, but I promise, that is the step by step breakdown of how people learn to dance, which I think can be applied to other forms of movement. That's why I think it would be helpful to stick with one type of class so that you can track your progress and build your vocabulary of moves.
Another thing that could help is to write down what a move means to you, or even draw it! You can reference your notes later. For me, writing stuff down helps commit to memory.
Once you get better at knowing what moves are called and what they look like based on the instructor demonstrating, you will figure out if you are better at processing visual or auditory cues. Stick with one and concentrate on that. Just use your secondary way of learning as backup. At dance classes I find so many students trying to watch, listen, and do all at the same time, no wonder they get confused!
posted by tinydancer at 6:46 PM on October 16, 2018 [6 favorites]
The reason I'm asking is that some of this is just familiarity with a certain set of basic moves, which gives you a solid foundation for other things that you add on top of that. For example, if you go to Zumba regularly, then you will probably recognize a merengue or cumbia step, or shoulder shimmies used repeatedly. One thing that would help is going to the same class over and over again (same instructor would be even better) so you slowly build up a familiarity with the basic steps and also the teacher's style of prompting you what will happen next.
Outside of class, try to watch videos and then break down the sequences into their component steps. Focus on 8 or 16 counts of music and just watch it repeatedly until you can:
- name each component step that makes up the sequence (e.g. cumbia, clap, and shoulder shimmy)
- call out the steps in the correct order (e.g. cumbia, cumbia, shoulder shimmy, clap clap, repeat)
- do each component step once you know its name (meaning when you hear/say cumbia, you know what to do, and you don't confuse it with other things)
- do each component step in the correct order
- see and confirm you are doing the right thing when you look at yourself in the mirror
- confirm you are doing the right thing just by feeling your movements in your own body
That sounds like a lot of work, I know, but I promise, that is the step by step breakdown of how people learn to dance, which I think can be applied to other forms of movement. That's why I think it would be helpful to stick with one type of class so that you can track your progress and build your vocabulary of moves.
Another thing that could help is to write down what a move means to you, or even draw it! You can reference your notes later. For me, writing stuff down helps commit to memory.
Once you get better at knowing what moves are called and what they look like based on the instructor demonstrating, you will figure out if you are better at processing visual or auditory cues. Stick with one and concentrate on that. Just use your secondary way of learning as backup. At dance classes I find so many students trying to watch, listen, and do all at the same time, no wonder they get confused!
posted by tinydancer at 6:46 PM on October 16, 2018 [6 favorites]
This is kind of a long shot, but I've had the same problem, and I think that the ideas in the book Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain are probably relevant. It has to do with whether you transform the world into words/abstractions before you work with it mentally. I think part of my problem was really that I was trying to translate all the dance movements into words, write down the words or memorize the words, and then translate the remembered words back into movements. It's slow! It's cumbersome! It misses the details that make things art, or make my movement completely match others' movements! It doesn't allow me to know what I can adjust slightly to turn it into self-expression! It becomes hear, translate, regurgitate, rather than picture->picture.
Anyway, that's my take. The book was very interesting.
posted by amtho at 8:02 PM on October 16, 2018
Anyway, that's my take. The book was very interesting.
posted by amtho at 8:02 PM on October 16, 2018
This is definitely what the mirrors are for in dance studios. Watch yourself until you have a better feel for where your body is.
posted by fshgrl at 9:55 PM on October 16, 2018
posted by fshgrl at 9:55 PM on October 16, 2018
I have this problem too. I discovered that an activity that worked for me was ballroom dance, because while I cannot for the life of me figure out how to follow people demonstrating moves, I can learn to do moves in response to tactile cues. (I very, very much prefer being a follow. I would be the world's worst lead.) For another example, I got into fencing. I'm the worst student at my school, but one thing I love about fencing is that if you (say) make a touch, it's not just visuals, it's the feel of the blade, ditto for good technique when you're parrying. Maybe look into activities that don't rely solely on following visuals, but take advantage of other senses that you're stronger at (for me this is kinesthetics and sound/rhythm)?
posted by yhlee at 10:16 PM on October 16, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by yhlee at 10:16 PM on October 16, 2018 [1 favorite]
I have this problem too. Seriously, I am a huge liability in a Zumba class. For a while when those dancing video games were popular, I would try to practice/learn the moves but I was laughably bad and would often realize that what I was moving on my body literally was not what I thought was happening.
I’ve noticed I’m better at following routines (even new ones!) if I am actively practicing yoga 2x/week. However ultimately I’ve decided this is just not my skill set, so instead I run, bike, and do OTF or Barre classes where the movements are routine. Even still, OTF body movements typixally require me to stop and review the screen several times per 20 minutes session and likely 1 question of the instructor. I’ve decided that’s OK.
posted by samthemander at 11:44 PM on October 16, 2018
I’ve noticed I’m better at following routines (even new ones!) if I am actively practicing yoga 2x/week. However ultimately I’ve decided this is just not my skill set, so instead I run, bike, and do OTF or Barre classes where the movements are routine. Even still, OTF body movements typixally require me to stop and review the screen several times per 20 minutes session and likely 1 question of the instructor. I’ve decided that’s OK.
posted by samthemander at 11:44 PM on October 16, 2018
Someone I knew said that Tai Chi classes helped a lot with their dyspraxia.
Another thing that helps, as tinydancer says, is doing this kind of stuff for long enough that you build up a kind of internal vocabulary of common moves and transitions. It's really likely that some of the people you see picking things up easily are really just drawing from this internal reference bank they've built up - not just in the class you're at, but their cumulative life experience of learning physical things. If you stick with it long enough to lock down a set of basic moves for some specific class, you might well find it much more straightforward, and be able to concentrate on the finer points instead of just on keeping up.
posted by quacks like a duck at 12:26 AM on October 17, 2018 [1 favorite]
Another thing that helps, as tinydancer says, is doing this kind of stuff for long enough that you build up a kind of internal vocabulary of common moves and transitions. It's really likely that some of the people you see picking things up easily are really just drawing from this internal reference bank they've built up - not just in the class you're at, but their cumulative life experience of learning physical things. If you stick with it long enough to lock down a set of basic moves for some specific class, you might well find it much more straightforward, and be able to concentrate on the finer points instead of just on keeping up.
posted by quacks like a duck at 12:26 AM on October 17, 2018 [1 favorite]
I have always been this type of person - terrible at telling my left from my right, hopeless at following along with movements - but I have to say that after a few years of practising yoga, I have become a lot better at this almost without noticing. I think quacks like a duck is right when they say that you build up a kind of internal reference bank - for me it's almost like building muscle memory for particular moves which mean that my body kind of knows where to go so I don't always have to engage my brain ("Wait which one's my left arm again?").
I think also that you have to try a few different kinds of group exercise till you find one that works for you. Being horribly coordinated and hopeless at dance-based exercise, I have found yoga to be much better suited to me. Maybe something which is a little less fast-paced, or something that focuses more on repeating the same move a number of times, would work better for you than a complicated dance routine? Of course, you need to pick a group class you'll actually enjoy, so ignore me if dance is your thing and you love it.
posted by Ziggy500 at 3:12 AM on October 17, 2018
I think also that you have to try a few different kinds of group exercise till you find one that works for you. Being horribly coordinated and hopeless at dance-based exercise, I have found yoga to be much better suited to me. Maybe something which is a little less fast-paced, or something that focuses more on repeating the same move a number of times, would work better for you than a complicated dance routine? Of course, you need to pick a group class you'll actually enjoy, so ignore me if dance is your thing and you love it.
posted by Ziggy500 at 3:12 AM on October 17, 2018
I'm also awful at this. My instructor let me set up a video camera to record her and then I practiced with that at home. It helped a lot bc I could repeat as much as I wanted til I learned the moves.
posted by ananci at 9:07 AM on October 17, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by ananci at 9:07 AM on October 17, 2018 [2 favorites]
I struggle with this too (do not give me verbal instructions for how to get somewhere. Just... don't.). For aerobic-y kinds of classes, I've found that going up to the teacher at the start, saying "I'm really bad at instructions and am just here to enjoy flailing all this clumsy meat around. Don't worry on getting me to line up with everyone else unless I'm about to hurt someone or myself." And then I go and flail my clumsy meat around. I'll often modify things to not use my arms if there is too much going on.
I've just started karate, for which there are a specific number of well-defined movements. I practice them a ton outside of class, looking in a mirror, and then with my eyes closed, to make sure I know what each individual component feels like. With all that I'm not-quite keeping up with folks at my level, but the teacher doesn't have to spend the whole time with me.
posted by tchemgrrl at 10:19 AM on October 17, 2018
I've just started karate, for which there are a specific number of well-defined movements. I practice them a ton outside of class, looking in a mirror, and then with my eyes closed, to make sure I know what each individual component feels like. With all that I'm not-quite keeping up with folks at my level, but the teacher doesn't have to spend the whole time with me.
posted by tchemgrrl at 10:19 AM on October 17, 2018
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I have also been to classes like you describe where I. just. could. not. get. the. ten-step sequence no matter how many times the instructor showed me (while everyone stood around bored). I wish I had just been allowed to puzzle over it by myself, maybe incorrectly for a little bit, and then I would have gotten it....
posted by Tandem Affinity at 5:40 PM on October 16, 2018 [2 favorites]