Write this joke for me please
February 4, 2018 6:47 AM Subscribe
For a story, not for real life :)
A snarky comment to be aimed at a spiritual guru type with partial hair loss. Like "You need to get in touch with your inner toupee" or "Did you kill a hairdresser in a previous life" but y'know, FUNNY.
You're lucky nothing's blocking your Third Eye.
posted by moonmilk at 6:54 AM on February 4, 2018 [9 favorites]
posted by moonmilk at 6:54 AM on February 4, 2018 [9 favorites]
Best answer: "Truly, less is more"
"I see you've simplified your life, starting at the top."
"I can see there is nothing between you and the celestial expanse."
posted by Caxton1476 at 6:54 AM on February 4, 2018 [10 favorites]
"I see you've simplified your life, starting at the top."
"I can see there is nothing between you and the celestial expanse."
posted by Caxton1476 at 6:54 AM on February 4, 2018 [10 favorites]
"Did your halo burn your hair off?"
posted by blue_wardrobe at 7:09 AM on February 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by blue_wardrobe at 7:09 AM on February 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
"Your brilliance is dazzling! Oh, wait, it's just the light reflecting off your bald patch..."
posted by blue_wardrobe at 7:14 AM on February 4, 2018
posted by blue_wardrobe at 7:14 AM on February 4, 2018
"How do you keep your chi from escaping through that?"
posted by starman at 7:14 AM on February 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by starman at 7:14 AM on February 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
Best answer: "Indeed, you are exemplar of accepting the transience of all things."
posted by Caxton1476 at 7:43 AM on February 4, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by Caxton1476 at 7:43 AM on February 4, 2018 [3 favorites]
"Your Sahasrara chakra is really clear."
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:45 AM on February 4, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:45 AM on February 4, 2018 [2 favorites]
Best answer: "I can see how much your mind has expanded by the way your hair feels the need to get out of its way."
posted by quinndexter at 7:45 AM on February 4, 2018 [6 favorites]
posted by quinndexter at 7:45 AM on February 4, 2018 [6 favorites]
"You ever see Withnail & I? Remember the 'Hair are your aerials' line? Looks like you might be having a bit of trouble tuning-in these days, if you know what I mean."
posted by quinndexter at 7:46 AM on February 4, 2018
posted by quinndexter at 7:46 AM on February 4, 2018
Best answer: I also like both of yours.
An amendment: "I hope you can someday find your inner hair-piece."
A silly one: "I might believe you are a guru if you gu-rew some more hair."
posted by The Deej at 7:46 AM on February 4, 2018 [14 favorites]
An amendment: "I hope you can someday find your inner hair-piece."
A silly one: "I might believe you are a guru if you gu-rew some more hair."
posted by The Deej at 7:46 AM on February 4, 2018 [14 favorites]
You are like a shining beacon, showing the way to others -- as long as you're not wearing a hat.
posted by jamjam at 7:47 AM on February 4, 2018
posted by jamjam at 7:47 AM on February 4, 2018
Namas-toupee?
Inner peace/outer alopecia.
posted by coppermoss at 7:51 AM on February 4, 2018 [4 favorites]
Inner peace/outer alopecia.
posted by coppermoss at 7:51 AM on February 4, 2018 [4 favorites]
Hair today, gone tomorrow
(The search for permanence is futile)
posted by honey-barbara at 8:11 AM on February 4, 2018 [2 favorites]
(The search for permanence is futile)
posted by honey-barbara at 8:11 AM on February 4, 2018 [2 favorites]
“He’s a great guy to go to if you need a koan. Not so much if you need a comb.”
posted by ejs at 8:56 AM on February 4, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by ejs at 8:56 AM on February 4, 2018 [4 favorites]
If possessions are meaningless, why can't you part with your hairbrush?
posted by rollick at 9:08 AM on February 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by rollick at 9:08 AM on February 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
It’s not a bald spot, it’s a solar panel for an...enlightenment machine.
posted by chesty_a_arthur at 10:04 AM on February 4, 2018
posted by chesty_a_arthur at 10:04 AM on February 4, 2018
Best answer: Lucky for you that true beauty comes from within.
posted by adamrice at 10:05 AM on February 4, 2018
posted by adamrice at 10:05 AM on February 4, 2018
Well if it isn’t my good friend, No-Hair-e Krishna.
posted by lieber hair at 10:17 AM on February 4, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by lieber hair at 10:17 AM on February 4, 2018 [2 favorites]
I like the terms Holy (Sacred, Blissful, Divine, Sublime) Combover.
posted by theora55 at 10:34 AM on February 4, 2018
posted by theora55 at 10:34 AM on February 4, 2018
What is the sound of one hair dropping?
Oh, I see you wouldn't know.
posted by ninazer0 at 1:35 PM on February 4, 2018
Oh, I see you wouldn't know.
posted by ninazer0 at 1:35 PM on February 4, 2018
Best answer: I see your hair has already moved on to its next life.
[reading the guru's palm, trying not to stare at their forehead] oh, it looks like you have a receding........lifeline
posted by icosahedron at 5:22 PM on February 4, 2018
[reading the guru's palm, trying not to stare at their forehead] oh, it looks like you have a receding........lifeline
posted by icosahedron at 5:22 PM on February 4, 2018
Check out tonsure to see if its a useful term for you. Guru? Your hairstyle made me assume you were a monk.
posted by theora55 at 11:59 AM on February 5, 2018
posted by theora55 at 11:59 AM on February 5, 2018
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posted by james33 at 6:49 AM on February 4, 2018 [1 favorite]