Mailbox Obligations

January 29, 2006 1:52 PM

I backed into this woman's mailbox about eight months ago and now she wants me to pay for it. What am I legally/socially obligated to do?

I understand these things can take time (it was an old stone/brick mailbox, not fancy or anything), but eight months is a bit long to wait. I did say when this happened, as obviously it was my fault, that I'd pay for the repairs. But she handled the situation inappropriately and too timely, in my opinion. I'm generally very honest and nice, but there are exceptions.

Anyway, being the curious and neurotic person that I am, I'm wondering what sort of legal grounds she or I have.

posted by deep_sea_diving_suit to law & government (24 answers total)

Be a decent human being and pay for it. Legally, at least in the UK, I think you make claims on things like that within 2 years of it actually happening. Obviously proving it happened is another matter entirely, but still.
posted by public at 1:55 PM on January 29, 2006

I don't understand what the issue is.

What does the eight month interval have to do with anything? What did she do that was "inappropriate and too timely", and what does *that* have to do with anything?

You wrecked her mailbox, dude. Suck it up and do the right thing - pay for it.
posted by jasper411 at 1:57 PM on January 29, 2006

I'd suggest adding more details about what exactly happened which would certainly help with this question.

In short: if you did damage to her property and admitted it, it would be a good idea to solve the problem of the damage. Other potential problems like her emotional attachment to the mailbox, bad blood between you, her being crazy and unreasonable, you being crazy and unreasonable, need to be sidelined in order to Solve The Problem.

Legally she could sue you in small claims court for the replacement value of the mailbox. This will cost her some filing costs and you some time off to go into court. Worst-case scenario, it was some fruity $500 mailbox and you owe some serious cash that you wouldn't have if you had worked this out with her straightaway. If she's pissed she'll go after you in a big way. Socially, it the right thing to do to make sure she has something that functions and looks more or less like it did before you damaged it.

So, some specifics:

- you said you'd pay for it, then what did she say "oh never mind" "I'll get in touch with you" "please get away from my mailbox" ?
- what was inappropriate about her response?
- what have you been doing in the intervening eight months to try to work this out with her?
- is this woman a neighbor? do you have any relationship with her besides this mailbox thing?
posted by jessamyn at 2:01 PM on January 29, 2006

The fact that she waited 8 months kind of sucks (because you forget about it, and don't budget for it) however, the fact that you admitted fault to her verbaly (assuming she can prove this in court, which shouldn't be too hard given this askme) means that you took responsibility legally. You only have so much time to sue someone, but it's much longer then 8 months.

Socially, 8 months has nothing to do with it.
posted by delmoi at 2:04 PM on January 29, 2006

What does the poster think the "socially obligated" time limit ought to be?

You (apparently) thought it was your responsibility when you back into it eight months ago. How does eight months elapsing make it not your responsibility?

Presumably, the woman waited, in part, to get an estimate of what the true cost of replacement would be, so as not top overcharge you. Had she not been so careful to protect your interests, she could have just made up a replacement cost (and padded it overly high, to ensure that it wouldn't be less than the actual replacement cost) when the accident occurred: "Give me two thousand bucks right now, because if we wait for a more correct estimate, you might welsh."

By welshing now, you help to add to a climate of mistrust; when non-welshers get into accidents in the future, they'll be hit up for more in damages sooner, because of fear that they'd follow your precedent.
posted by orthogonality at 2:06 PM on January 29, 2006

I'd say that how long she takes doesn't really matter. You're the one who broke a mailbox, you're the one with fault, and you're the one with a duty to make it right. She's the one you've wronged, she's your victim, and she isn't under any obligation to care about your convenience as she goes about undoing the damage you did.

If it's more convenient for you to get it over with now, I'd contact the person and offer her some reasonable (plus sweetener) amount of money here, now, cash-on-the-barrelhead as full restitution.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 2:12 PM on January 29, 2006

...and what's up with the 'ipod' tag?
posted by youcancallmeal at 2:19 PM on January 29, 2006

um, Pay for a new mailbox. You ran over it, you should replace it.
posted by mkelley at 2:22 PM on January 29, 2006

I'm confused. You're saying 8 months is too long, but then later on you're saying she's "too timely"?

But yeah, you ought to pay for a new mailbox.
posted by Orrorin at 2:26 PM on January 29, 2006

...and what's up with the 'ipod' tag?

I was wondering the same. It is part of the example tags, though — so maybe some confusion with the instruction there?

Oh, and pay up.
posted by rafter at 2:26 PM on January 29, 2006

You backed into a freakin mailbox and you are wondering what legal grounds YOU have? Simply because she didn't meet your timeline? Jesus F'in Christ, man...no wonder there are some many lawyers. As noted more eloquently above, why don't you just sack up and be an adult and pay for it.

The only scenario I can see in which I would feel bad about the tone of my advice here is if you backed into a 40 dollar mailbox and now 8 months later she wants a 400 dollar brick faced, landscaped Frank Lloyd Wright inspired custom piece of art deco. However, you didn't provide that kind of detail.
posted by spicynuts at 2:28 PM on January 29, 2006

Socially, you are obligated. No more than what she had, and if you don't have the money on hand eight months after, she can wait for your next paycheck.

She's not being the most reasonable by waiting so long, but you still wrecked her mailbox, so you can still replace it. The only way you have any reason to even hesitate is if she's asking for more than the cost of a reasonably similar mailbox.
posted by Saydur at 2:41 PM on January 29, 2006

Unless you left out some major details, I'm voting for pay for it. If you can't afford that at the moment, pay in regular installments.
posted by I Love Tacos at 2:47 PM on January 29, 2006

I can sympathize with the problem I think you're having. You ran over her mailbox, and thinking it would cause her hardship, you offered to pay immediately. The fact that she waited 8 months means it wasn't really causing her much hardship, and now it just seems to you like she's decided she wants a new mailbox, and wants you to pay for it. Right?

Sucks dude. But yeah, you should pay, if for no other reason than to get her to shut up. Make sure you see an estimate for the repairs (don't buy her a new one if the one she had can be repaired) and get something signed that says "this is over when I pay for repairs," so that you can put a period on it and move on.
posted by Hildago at 2:54 PM on January 29, 2006

Was it an ugly mailbox?

I think Hidalgo has the reasoning right with his first paragraph. It is one thing to say 'I broke something of yours, how much do I owe you?' and another to say 'I broke something of yours, feel free to drop by any time between now and the hour of my death with an invoice.' Sometimes one person does another some minor wrong and the wrongee then holds it over the wronger's head for a disproportional amount of time. Given enough of that, the wrongee may start to feel that he/she has already done enough penance.

Of course, we definitely need more details.
posted by bingo at 3:18 PM on January 29, 2006

er, that is, the wrongER may start to fee lthat he/she has done enough penance.
posted by bingo at 3:20 PM on January 29, 2006

Assuming you're in Texas (via your lat/long):

§ 16.003. TWO-YEAR LIMITATIONS PERIOD
(a) Except as provided by Sections 16.010 and 16.0045, a person must bring suit for trespass for injury to the estate or to the property of another, conversion of personal property, taking or detaining the personal property of another, personal injury, forcible entry and detainer, and forcible detainer not later than two years after the day the cause of action accrues.
(b) A person must bring suit not later than two years after the day the cause of action accrues in an action for injury
resulting in death. The cause of action accrues on the death of the injured person.

I guess legally you could make her actually go to the trouble of suing you... don't know if there would be any additional repercussions if she went ahead and sued you, though (i.e. additional costs).
posted by magwich at 3:20 PM on January 29, 2006

Is there some sort of statute of limitations I don't know about on destroying someones mailbox living up to your word?

Sure, maybe eight months is a long time, but that gave you either an eight months to come up with the cash or eight months or interest on it. And she may have thought to ask now instead of right before the holidays, possibly screwing up your gift budget.
posted by blueberry at 3:26 PM on January 29, 2006

I'd talk to the woman and make sure that you're only paying for damages that you actually caused and nothing more. I dented someones bumper in stop-n-go traffic several years ago and the woman waited over a year to file the claim. I had seen her driving around Sacramento several times. I knew it was her car because the dent, although very minor, was unique.
Lucky for me, the insurance company didn't believe her when along with her claim she tried to submit a bunch of chiropractic bills. She tried to claim bodily injury!

To make a long story short, I fought with DMV and with the help of my former insurance company, everything was dismissed and the fender bender fell off my record.

So, talk to the mailbox owner and offer a reasonable settlement.
posted by drstein at 3:59 PM on January 29, 2006

Yeah, it sucks that she wasn't very diligent. Yeah, it also sucks that you've had to deal with whatever obnoxious behavior she's been engaging in since then. If she has been a real witch all this times (and, frankly, you may not be the most objective obeserver of her behavior), she is indeed adding insult to injury.

Nevertheless, the fact that she took longer than you would have liked does nothing to alter your obligation to her. You damaged her mailbox that does not give you the right to set a time table for her. Ethical obligatins do not go away simply because they are owed to a jerk.
posted by oddman at 4:47 PM on January 29, 2006

Pay, its the moral and legal thing to do.

My neighbor backed over mine last fall. I am glad he didn't see me laughing. The two of has had a new one in in an hour or so including the trip to Home Depot. It was only about $60 or so for a decent mailbox and pole. I paid for the beer.
posted by caddis at 6:12 PM on January 29, 2006

"Give me two thousand bucks right now, because if we wait for a more correct estimate, you might welsh."

Slurs are beneath you, orthogonality, regardless of your intent.
posted by Kwantsar at 7:13 PM on January 29, 2006

lol @ caddis, thats great stuff. and definitely pay because then it will all be over.
posted by pwally at 7:31 PM on January 29, 2006

You don't necessarily have to buy her a *new* mailbox, but you do have to restore what you damaged. A brand new stone mailbox might be pretty expensive, but you can probably get someone to repair it for $50 or so.
posted by electroboy at 11:36 AM on January 30, 2006