Solutions to anomie?
July 26, 2017 5:46 PM Subscribe
Since finding out about the concept of anomie (by Emile Durkheim), I have increasingly felt this applies to me. Anomie refers to basically lacking a sense of meaning in society - a sense that since there are so many ways of looking at the world, none of them are truly right or wrong. How can I go about remedying this?
I'm looking for anecdotal evidence for how people figured out how to battle this feeling. I guess the fun-house feeling of modern society, coupled with the fact of constant, massive & unjustified suffering all over the globe, sort of do make life absurd. So amidst it all, how do people figure out what matters to them? Sorry if this question is little vague but still any specific pointers would be appreciated!
I'm looking for anecdotal evidence for how people figured out how to battle this feeling. I guess the fun-house feeling of modern society, coupled with the fact of constant, massive & unjustified suffering all over the globe, sort of do make life absurd. So amidst it all, how do people figure out what matters to them? Sorry if this question is little vague but still any specific pointers would be appreciated!
This is one of the deepest questions a human can face. There is no answer. Anecdotes or suggestions are pretty much all you'll get. Then you’re on your own.
To my mind, that’s not necessarily a depressing thought. It can also be liberating. If there is no one right way to live, you are free to construct your own way. You are even free to change your mind, to experiment, to improvise. Some suggestions:
It seems clear that most people feel peace is better than war, happiness better than misery, financial security better than poverty, love better than hate. If that also makes sense to you, then you can start with that. But what can one person do? Well, clearly, the answer isn’t “nothing.” If you give a quarter to a homeless person, well, that’s not nothing, is it? It’s something. To rebut the “nothing” argument all you need is a quarter.
OK, now that we know the answer isn’t “nothing,” the question becomes “What should I do?” And that question leads down a path where you get to choose your own answers, perhaps looking around for examples or guidance from others. You can also ask a similar question concerning your own happiness. “What makes me happy?”, see where that takes you.
My final suggestion is, if those questions seems impossible to even begin to answer, accept that any answers you give are provisional, the best you can come up with right now, then just do anything at all that seems to sort-of address them. The feeling of doing something—anything--rather than nothing, anomie hates that.
None of this leads to a Zenlike state of fulfillment or a zealot’s sense of certainty. At least not for me. The anomie still rears its head. But you can learn to slap it around until it retreats whimpering back into its cave.
Oh, and welcome to the human race. There is no cure but the condition is benign.
posted by mono blanco at 7:06 PM on July 26, 2017 [8 favorites]
To my mind, that’s not necessarily a depressing thought. It can also be liberating. If there is no one right way to live, you are free to construct your own way. You are even free to change your mind, to experiment, to improvise. Some suggestions:
It seems clear that most people feel peace is better than war, happiness better than misery, financial security better than poverty, love better than hate. If that also makes sense to you, then you can start with that. But what can one person do? Well, clearly, the answer isn’t “nothing.” If you give a quarter to a homeless person, well, that’s not nothing, is it? It’s something. To rebut the “nothing” argument all you need is a quarter.
OK, now that we know the answer isn’t “nothing,” the question becomes “What should I do?” And that question leads down a path where you get to choose your own answers, perhaps looking around for examples or guidance from others. You can also ask a similar question concerning your own happiness. “What makes me happy?”, see where that takes you.
My final suggestion is, if those questions seems impossible to even begin to answer, accept that any answers you give are provisional, the best you can come up with right now, then just do anything at all that seems to sort-of address them. The feeling of doing something—anything--rather than nothing, anomie hates that.
None of this leads to a Zenlike state of fulfillment or a zealot’s sense of certainty. At least not for me. The anomie still rears its head. But you can learn to slap it around until it retreats whimpering back into its cave.
Oh, and welcome to the human race. There is no cure but the condition is benign.
posted by mono blanco at 7:06 PM on July 26, 2017 [8 favorites]
You know how color doesn't exist "out" in the world? It's a function of how our eyes perceive reflected wavelengths of light.
Meaning is a lot like that. It's an internal, personal process -- it doesn't exist outside of yourself and your own perceptions. Which can be both incredibly freeing and incredibly frightening. If everything is equally valid how can one make a distinction and adopt a personal philosophy of meaning?
For some people meaning lies within personal connections, for others it's a belief system or a cause they can rally behind. For still others it's an aesthetic principle. What gives you a sense of joy? What makes you feel connected to the universe? What things do you do that feel the most satisfying? What can you do to make the world a better place, even in a small way? The question of meaning isn't exactly resolved just by answering those questions, but they are part of the process.
I think meaning, much like happiness, has more to do with engagement (with yourself, with others, or with activities) than feeling.
posted by ananci at 8:00 PM on July 26, 2017 [2 favorites]
Meaning is a lot like that. It's an internal, personal process -- it doesn't exist outside of yourself and your own perceptions. Which can be both incredibly freeing and incredibly frightening. If everything is equally valid how can one make a distinction and adopt a personal philosophy of meaning?
For some people meaning lies within personal connections, for others it's a belief system or a cause they can rally behind. For still others it's an aesthetic principle. What gives you a sense of joy? What makes you feel connected to the universe? What things do you do that feel the most satisfying? What can you do to make the world a better place, even in a small way? The question of meaning isn't exactly resolved just by answering those questions, but they are part of the process.
I think meaning, much like happiness, has more to do with engagement (with yourself, with others, or with activities) than feeling.
posted by ananci at 8:00 PM on July 26, 2017 [2 favorites]
Personally, I have always found a huge vein of meaning through reading classic literature (or not necessarily literature, even just essays written in days of yore, which you can easily find online for free.) There is a wealth of genuine human genius, psychology, and overall meaning to be found there, which I feel is only shallowly touched on throughout the typical modern education and requires striking out on one's own to find.
Besides that, I find defining myself through a job/profession fails for me and for many people who don't have a "calling" or an exciting job. And that's okay. I work to live, to have money and time to spend on other things, and this is a perfectly valid mode of going through life which is not praised nearly enough. Of course, I have some small sense of self wrapped up in my job and some specialized knowledge there, but it's not my main sense of identity.
I would say, although cliche, my main sense of identity and purpose in life is my relationship with other people. This is now mainly through my husband/family for me (a married old or somewhat old) but was not always so- even connections with strangers, fleeting acquaintances, or online are perfectly valid and "count" (though don't provide as permanent an identity as a spouse or children.) Any kind of social connection at all works and is valid and should not be underestimated or forgotten. I promise you that you have deeply mattered to someone else even if you can't think of it right now. Someone looked up to you or remembered some kind thing you did, which you may even have forgotten. Pets count, too.
Religion isn't my thing but works well for many friends of mine as far as finding a sense of meaning/focus.
I find that sharing excitement about a hobby or even something like a tv show can be surprisingly deeply meaningful and many people find a niche in "fandom."
Politics, of course, is an option, but I am pretty unmotivated/tend to feel like it's a drop in the ocean kind of thing.
Being in nature never, ever fails to snap me out of being totally blase. It's really almost miraculous how much the natural world still affects my sense of wonder and the preciousness of life even as I get older, maybe especially as I get older.
posted by stockpuppet at 8:47 PM on July 26, 2017 [7 favorites]
Besides that, I find defining myself through a job/profession fails for me and for many people who don't have a "calling" or an exciting job. And that's okay. I work to live, to have money and time to spend on other things, and this is a perfectly valid mode of going through life which is not praised nearly enough. Of course, I have some small sense of self wrapped up in my job and some specialized knowledge there, but it's not my main sense of identity.
I would say, although cliche, my main sense of identity and purpose in life is my relationship with other people. This is now mainly through my husband/family for me (a married old or somewhat old) but was not always so- even connections with strangers, fleeting acquaintances, or online are perfectly valid and "count" (though don't provide as permanent an identity as a spouse or children.) Any kind of social connection at all works and is valid and should not be underestimated or forgotten. I promise you that you have deeply mattered to someone else even if you can't think of it right now. Someone looked up to you or remembered some kind thing you did, which you may even have forgotten. Pets count, too.
Religion isn't my thing but works well for many friends of mine as far as finding a sense of meaning/focus.
I find that sharing excitement about a hobby or even something like a tv show can be surprisingly deeply meaningful and many people find a niche in "fandom."
Politics, of course, is an option, but I am pretty unmotivated/tend to feel like it's a drop in the ocean kind of thing.
Being in nature never, ever fails to snap me out of being totally blase. It's really almost miraculous how much the natural world still affects my sense of wonder and the preciousness of life even as I get older, maybe especially as I get older.
posted by stockpuppet at 8:47 PM on July 26, 2017 [7 favorites]
Living in a cold, empty, unfeeling universe makes it all the more important to love one another. I mean, it's up to us--no one else can do it. But if you do something kind, then kindness exists. If you understand that everyone is in some sense or another alone and misunderstood, then you can accept that kindness, given and received, is a pretty good alternative. So give what you can, be grateful for small things, and then try to have fun. I'm sure that's an oversimplification, but most days it's enough for me.
posted by Wobbuffet at 9:26 PM on July 26, 2017 [7 favorites]
posted by Wobbuffet at 9:26 PM on July 26, 2017 [7 favorites]
I am an atheist and I also don't believe, or even really understand, concepts like spirituality, or the belief that there is some inherent purpose to the universe. The universe is made up of inanimate materials and has no agency. It can't have a purpose, anymore than a rock I could pick up. Would I grab a rock and think, "What does this rock have in store for me? What is it planning, and what does it want me to do?" I wouldn't, that would be absurd.
That may sound like the problem that you are having, but for me this is in no way a problem. I find it very liberating not to have to wonder about things that I know are not real. That frees me up to decide what I think is important and what I care about. You mention the suffering of many people, so you clearly care about that and know it's wrong. It seems self-evident to me that kindness, compassion, and helping are good, and that selfishness, callousness, and cruelty are bad. I don't need a philosophy to tell me that. We might tend to think of people who want to brighten someone's day by offering a smile or a kind word as a bit naive, perhaps, but I think they're onto something. That's one simple thing to do: practice kindness.
Another concept I find useful is being grateful. It's easy to be angry and annoyed. It takes effort to be grateful, especially when things aren't going so well.
Since you ask for anecdotes: My boyfriend was very ill a few years ago and died. His friends were so overwhelmingly kind and supportive that I will never think that anything other than being loving and kind could be more important. I am not especially loving and kind myself, (not really sure how to do it most of the time), but it's a way of thinking and of being that stays with me.
And since religion doesn't do anything for me, I find that the arts and humanities are a source of meaning. The universe has no meaning, but we can discover and create what is meaningful to us.
posted by Vispa Teresa at 2:54 AM on July 27, 2017 [3 favorites]
That may sound like the problem that you are having, but for me this is in no way a problem. I find it very liberating not to have to wonder about things that I know are not real. That frees me up to decide what I think is important and what I care about. You mention the suffering of many people, so you clearly care about that and know it's wrong. It seems self-evident to me that kindness, compassion, and helping are good, and that selfishness, callousness, and cruelty are bad. I don't need a philosophy to tell me that. We might tend to think of people who want to brighten someone's day by offering a smile or a kind word as a bit naive, perhaps, but I think they're onto something. That's one simple thing to do: practice kindness.
Another concept I find useful is being grateful. It's easy to be angry and annoyed. It takes effort to be grateful, especially when things aren't going so well.
Since you ask for anecdotes: My boyfriend was very ill a few years ago and died. His friends were so overwhelmingly kind and supportive that I will never think that anything other than being loving and kind could be more important. I am not especially loving and kind myself, (not really sure how to do it most of the time), but it's a way of thinking and of being that stays with me.
And since religion doesn't do anything for me, I find that the arts and humanities are a source of meaning. The universe has no meaning, but we can discover and create what is meaningful to us.
posted by Vispa Teresa at 2:54 AM on July 27, 2017 [3 favorites]
Anomie refers to basically lacking a sense of meaning in society - a sense that since there are so many ways of looking at the world, none of them are truly right or wrong. How can I go about remedying this?
I spent a few years thinking about what "meaning" meant to me, concluded that requiring every thing to mean something else must necessarily involve ignoring that which made it unique and therefore interesting in its own right, and that deliberately choosing not to seek meaning in everything as a whole was therefore a far more enriching way to live.
We hear an awful lot of earnest and well intended commentary about how difficult it is to find meaning in existence, as if the only legitimate aim of being a thinking person were to find a way of looking at the world that makes the whole thing make sense. But the whole thing just does not make sense. Not to anybody. How could it? It's so vast and we're so limited.
Quite large parts of it do, and the basic methodology of science (test what is testable and try to avoid taking a position on what is not) is a useful way of getting a handle on those, but the overwhelming majority of stuff that goes on remains random and wild. Anybody who tells you different is trying to sell you something.
The only way to make the entirety of a lived experience seem to make sense involves a dedicated and studious avoidance of attending to such parts as don't seem to fit.
Some people do that because they're frightened of things they don't understand and would prefer never to encounter such things. But I recommend reacting to mysteries not with fear, but with delighted laughter. This saves a lot of avoidable angst.
Not having a fucking clue what I'm doing? That's where I'm a Viking.
posted by flabdablet at 3:49 AM on July 27, 2017 [4 favorites]
I spent a few years thinking about what "meaning" meant to me, concluded that requiring every thing to mean something else must necessarily involve ignoring that which made it unique and therefore interesting in its own right, and that deliberately choosing not to seek meaning in everything as a whole was therefore a far more enriching way to live.
We hear an awful lot of earnest and well intended commentary about how difficult it is to find meaning in existence, as if the only legitimate aim of being a thinking person were to find a way of looking at the world that makes the whole thing make sense. But the whole thing just does not make sense. Not to anybody. How could it? It's so vast and we're so limited.
Quite large parts of it do, and the basic methodology of science (test what is testable and try to avoid taking a position on what is not) is a useful way of getting a handle on those, but the overwhelming majority of stuff that goes on remains random and wild. Anybody who tells you different is trying to sell you something.
The only way to make the entirety of a lived experience seem to make sense involves a dedicated and studious avoidance of attending to such parts as don't seem to fit.
Some people do that because they're frightened of things they don't understand and would prefer never to encounter such things. But I recommend reacting to mysteries not with fear, but with delighted laughter. This saves a lot of avoidable angst.
Not having a fucking clue what I'm doing? That's where I'm a Viking.
posted by flabdablet at 3:49 AM on July 27, 2017 [4 favorites]
Would I grab a rock and think, "What does this rock have in store for me? What is it planning, and what does it want me to do?" I wouldn't, that would be absurd.
The rock, meanwhile, is completely counting on you thinking that. It's just biding its time, waiting for its chance to interrupt the forward swing of your bare big toe.
posted by flabdablet at 3:51 AM on July 27, 2017 [4 favorites]
The rock, meanwhile, is completely counting on you thinking that. It's just biding its time, waiting for its chance to interrupt the forward swing of your bare big toe.
posted by flabdablet at 3:51 AM on July 27, 2017 [4 favorites]
Well you asked for anecdotes so I got one for you.
In my personal exploration of meaning in the world I came to the conclusion that exercising/fitness is the one life direction that is almost never a mistake. It enhances most aspects of life equally and it is rarely a "mistake" to be physically fit.
It might be possible to regret choosing a career/lover/spouse/school/major/philosophy/etc but for me using this principle of "least possible regret" excercise is a pretty safe choice. Aside from injuries or prior disability I think this is a pretty universal plus.
Keep in mind I'm not saying go become a bodybuilder...I'm saying something as simple as playing around with a 5 lbs weight or some exercise bands in your free time instead of pursuing other choices of "meaning" that be paralyzing you into procrastination or indecision.
EDIT: Also weed helps a lot (makes working out feel really good and gives your brain some time off from all this intense philosophical confusion)
posted by laptolain at 5:01 PM on July 27, 2017
In my personal exploration of meaning in the world I came to the conclusion that exercising/fitness is the one life direction that is almost never a mistake. It enhances most aspects of life equally and it is rarely a "mistake" to be physically fit.
It might be possible to regret choosing a career/lover/spouse/school/major/philosophy/etc but for me using this principle of "least possible regret" excercise is a pretty safe choice. Aside from injuries or prior disability I think this is a pretty universal plus.
Keep in mind I'm not saying go become a bodybuilder...I'm saying something as simple as playing around with a 5 lbs weight or some exercise bands in your free time instead of pursuing other choices of "meaning" that be paralyzing you into procrastination or indecision.
EDIT: Also weed helps a lot (makes working out feel really good and gives your brain some time off from all this intense philosophical confusion)
posted by laptolain at 5:01 PM on July 27, 2017
I had boatloads of the feeling over a number of years after realizing that I could no longer believe in the fundamentalist faith that I was raised in. Looking back, what made the feeling go away for me was becoming a father, and then, not long after, a single father. It's not that anomie was replaced by all good feelings. A lot of it was replaced with anxiety, pressure, frustration, and boredom. But the philosophical fact of the meaninglessness of my existence no longer played a role in my emotional life. Whatever else I was overwhelmed by, I was needed by someone. I was useful.
"Have a baby" isn't a general solution to the problem. It's certainly not a cure for negative emotions. But I think it points in what's the right direction for many people when it comes to anomie: We are social animals. Anomie flows into the void left by lack of connection to other people, lack of feeling useful to other people. Being connected to other people brings its own complications and negative emotions, but rarely anomie.
posted by clawsoon at 6:27 PM on July 27, 2017 [1 favorite]
"Have a baby" isn't a general solution to the problem. It's certainly not a cure for negative emotions. But I think it points in what's the right direction for many people when it comes to anomie: We are social animals. Anomie flows into the void left by lack of connection to other people, lack of feeling useful to other people. Being connected to other people brings its own complications and negative emotions, but rarely anomie.
posted by clawsoon at 6:27 PM on July 27, 2017 [1 favorite]
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- I reject pure determinism (everything comes from first causes and is equally acceptable) because that means belief and non-belief in determinism are equally correct
- I reject a purely moralistic view of the world because I feel it is too parochial and often power based (see Raymond Smullyan's "Is God a Taoist")
- And I reject a purely impersonal view of the world because I believe I would deeply regret it on my death bed...in my view, people matter and pursuing principles at the expense of people is wrong (e.g., see Brené Brown's writings and videos, or this quote: "Tolerance applies only to persons, but never to principles. Intolerance applies only to principles, but never to persons." ---Fulton J. Sheen)
My view, FWIW
posted by forthright at 6:44 PM on July 26, 2017 [3 favorites]