Wedding gift amount
July 23, 2017 9:18 PM Subscribe
I have a wedding coming up (my first as an adult) and I don't know how much to spend for a wedding gift. My sister is the bride's best friend. I know the bride, we're friendly but we aren't friends (not even on Facebook). I'm just starting to establish my self in a career and most guides seem to say $75-100 which is a huge luxury amount for something I'd buy myself, and is almost/all of my fun money for an entire month but I'm not trying to be a cheapskate either. Everyone lives in the Midwest.
I, internet celebrity, concur. Spend what you're comfortable spending.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 9:35 PM on July 23, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by Joseph Gurl at 9:35 PM on July 23, 2017 [3 favorites]
Someone's gotta buy the measuring cups, miscellaneous pillow shams, hand towels, egg timers, spatulas, and other sundries that appear on registries. I say pick a few things, maybe things that are thematically similar (like measuring implements) and group them into a gift. You can even make a cheesy pun on the card ("Counting on many years of happiness!") or something, although that is, well, completely optional.
posted by delight at 9:41 PM on July 23, 2017 [10 favorites]
posted by delight at 9:41 PM on July 23, 2017 [10 favorites]
So, let me tell you a secret about weddings. Nobody but the bride and groom will probably ever see your gift. Spend what you can afford, and don't let the wedding-industrial complex make you feel bad about it.
My go to gift in a situation like this would be a really nice picture frame. Almost everyone gets photos of the wedding, but they don't always have a really nice frame to display one in. You can even go to places in the mall and get it engraved with her names and wedding date. If this cost you more than $40 I'd be very surprised. But it's personal, and thoughtful, and practical.
posted by anastasiav at 9:56 PM on July 23, 2017 [12 favorites]
My go to gift in a situation like this would be a really nice picture frame. Almost everyone gets photos of the wedding, but they don't always have a really nice frame to display one in. You can even go to places in the mall and get it engraved with her names and wedding date. If this cost you more than $40 I'd be very surprised. But it's personal, and thoughtful, and practical.
posted by anastasiav at 9:56 PM on July 23, 2017 [12 favorites]
I've bought wedding gifts ranging from $25 for acquaintances to $300 for my husband's best man. No need to go all out. For acquaintances, I choose to buy a couple of the cheap requests from the registry.
posted by Ruki at 10:02 PM on July 23, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by Ruki at 10:02 PM on July 23, 2017 [2 favorites]
If they don't have or there's nothing suitable on the registry? Buy them a couple of champagne glasses and a picture frame suitable for a wedding photo - from some place like Target or Ross would be fine. It's a wedding-themed gift that looks thoughtful and less cheap than it is. They won't be expecting anything more from an aquaintance (and if they are that says more about them than it does about you).
posted by hazyjane at 10:09 PM on July 23, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by hazyjane at 10:09 PM on July 23, 2017 [3 favorites]
A friend in similar circumstances got us a $15 cake pan that I use all the time and she told me that part of the gift was that we were not under any circumstances to send her a thank you note. It was such a thoughtful gesture of how she valued my time that I've remembered it always.
posted by girlhacker at 10:43 PM on July 23, 2017 [12 favorites]
posted by girlhacker at 10:43 PM on July 23, 2017 [12 favorites]
As Miss Manners keeps reminding people, gifts are optional, not compulsory!
Especially in situations like this!
posted by Murderbot at 10:50 PM on July 23, 2017 [1 favorite]
Especially in situations like this!
posted by Murderbot at 10:50 PM on July 23, 2017 [1 favorite]
It should not be taken as an OBLIGATION kind of thing in any way, but I have found it kind of helpful to think about the party they're throwing and what I'm going to be getting out of it in the way of food/drink/etc and not necessarily guess at what they're spending, but look at what I'd typically spend for a nice and enjoyable evening out, since hopefully that is indeed what I'm going to be having. Depending on my financial circumstances, that's usually run in the $25-$50 range rather than the $75-$100 range, which in my economic class I consider to be more like "gifts for people I'm actually incredibly close to". I think the guides skew high because, well, it's mostly comfortably-off middle-class people who consult guides as to how much to spend on something.
It's not about "you need to pay for your meal" or anything like that, just that it makes sense for a wedding gift to be around that same price point, which will vary heavily depending on your personal circumstances. If you wouldn't spend $100 for yourself as your part of an evening with friends for something other than a mega-special occasion, then don't feel like you should spend that on this if you aren't that close to the person.
posted by Sequence at 10:58 PM on July 23, 2017
It's not about "you need to pay for your meal" or anything like that, just that it makes sense for a wedding gift to be around that same price point, which will vary heavily depending on your personal circumstances. If you wouldn't spend $100 for yourself as your part of an evening with friends for something other than a mega-special occasion, then don't feel like you should spend that on this if you aren't that close to the person.
posted by Sequence at 10:58 PM on July 23, 2017
As a fellow Midwestern wedding goer, I'd spend $40.
$100 (i.e., one china setting) is more in the neighborhood of what I'd spend for a close relative or very good friend, especially if you're just out of school.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 11:03 PM on July 23, 2017 [2 favorites]
$100 (i.e., one china setting) is more in the neighborhood of what I'd spend for a close relative or very good friend, especially if you're just out of school.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 11:03 PM on July 23, 2017 [2 favorites]
Since you don't know this person very well, why would you splurge on her gift?
(If you can crochet, like at all, I've got an easy (I can do it in the car without looking) awesome patten for pot holders that costs $4 in yarn and about 3 hours of time for a set of two. And then it's handmade pot holders.
posted by leahwrenn at 11:04 PM on July 23, 2017 [2 favorites]
(If you can crochet, like at all, I've got an easy (I can do it in the car without looking) awesome patten for pot holders that costs $4 in yarn and about 3 hours of time for a set of two. And then it's handmade pot holders.
posted by leahwrenn at 11:04 PM on July 23, 2017 [2 favorites]
I agree with Ruki -- I think you would be fine with spending $25. Or even $15, really.
If they have items in that price range on their registry, that's an easy way to go.
Or you can go to Crate & Barrel's under-$25 wedding registry suggestion page, and pick something from there. Some of the items are $4.95, so you can get multiples of those -- like the champagne glass.
posted by merejane at 3:41 AM on July 24, 2017 [3 favorites]
If they have items in that price range on their registry, that's an easy way to go.
Or you can go to Crate & Barrel's under-$25 wedding registry suggestion page, and pick something from there. Some of the items are $4.95, so you can get multiples of those -- like the champagne glass.
posted by merejane at 3:41 AM on July 24, 2017 [3 favorites]
"just starting to establish my self in a career" (or other notable financial limitation) is a valid reason for spending a smaller amount on a gift. I think something in the neighborhood of $15-25 would be fine.
And even then I think the "guides" are a bit on the high side; I am well established in my career, not particularly wanting for money, and I'd probably spend around $50 on a wedding gift for someone I wasn't super-close to. (I'm also in the Midwest.)
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 4:20 AM on July 24, 2017 [1 favorite]
And even then I think the "guides" are a bit on the high side; I am well established in my career, not particularly wanting for money, and I'd probably spend around $50 on a wedding gift for someone I wasn't super-close to. (I'm also in the Midwest.)
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 4:20 AM on July 24, 2017 [1 favorite]
Any chance you could pitch in a bit ($25 or so) to your sister's gift or go in with another guest or two? Otherwise I think the $40 mark sounds about right. They are probably aware that you're not rolling in cash and won't be expecting an extravagant gift.
posted by emd3737 at 4:35 AM on July 24, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by emd3737 at 4:35 AM on July 24, 2017 [3 favorites]
If you do the picture frame and can wrangle a pic of the couple to put in it, you get more bang for the buck.
posted by SemiSalt at 4:54 AM on July 24, 2017
posted by SemiSalt at 4:54 AM on July 24, 2017
Around $20. Factors:
1) Not particularly close to said couple.
2) Just starting to establish myself in career. If you were a couple of years older and had established yourself (with disposable income!), I would say something like $40 to $60 was more appropriate.
3) Midwest.
posted by moiraine at 5:01 AM on July 24, 2017 [2 favorites]
1) Not particularly close to said couple.
2) Just starting to establish myself in career. If you were a couple of years older and had established yourself (with disposable income!), I would say something like $40 to $60 was more appropriate.
3) Midwest.
posted by moiraine at 5:01 AM on July 24, 2017 [2 favorites]
Concur with everyone telling you to buy the egg timer. Most couples these days build out their registries to accommodate varying levels of spendiness.
It's true that gifts are totally optional - I would not have been upset at any of our wedding guests if they hadn't gotten us a gift. Because we really didn't need anything - we literally only made a registry so we wouldn't get a whole bunch of random stuff from people! Does their registry have a sentence like, "we really only want your presence?" Bc if so, I think you're off the hook.
However, if you *can* afford the $20 pot holders (which is really nice for pot holders btw), why wouldn't you?
I have to disagree with users telling you to go off registry, and to give picture frames or crafts. Everyone's taste is so different, and yours may vary wildly from theirs.
Even though we spent a decent effort on a economically fair registry (no srsly, we had $4.50 Muji stationary on there)--specifically built so people would fulfill their desire to buy a thing for us--we *still* got random stuff that doesn't fit our lifestyle or decor at all. Not that I'm not grateful for their kindness, but the gifts have just turned into clutter. I'm looking at you, lovely Victorian-style repro picture frame collecting dust in our minimalist house.
The exception to this was a contribution to the ACLU given on our behalf. Hell yah! So that could be another route.
Really! If they don't have anything affordable-to-you on the registry, that's on them... and a nice card will be totally fine.
(Also, cash money or a Honeyfund contribution however small is totally not gauche these days. We were so grateful for just cold hard cash!)
Apologies for the ramble! Good luck and have fun!
posted by functionequalsform at 5:20 AM on July 24, 2017 [1 favorite]
It's true that gifts are totally optional - I would not have been upset at any of our wedding guests if they hadn't gotten us a gift. Because we really didn't need anything - we literally only made a registry so we wouldn't get a whole bunch of random stuff from people! Does their registry have a sentence like, "we really only want your presence?" Bc if so, I think you're off the hook.
However, if you *can* afford the $20 pot holders (which is really nice for pot holders btw), why wouldn't you?
I have to disagree with users telling you to go off registry, and to give picture frames or crafts. Everyone's taste is so different, and yours may vary wildly from theirs.
Even though we spent a decent effort on a economically fair registry (no srsly, we had $4.50 Muji stationary on there)--specifically built so people would fulfill their desire to buy a thing for us--we *still* got random stuff that doesn't fit our lifestyle or decor at all. Not that I'm not grateful for their kindness, but the gifts have just turned into clutter. I'm looking at you, lovely Victorian-style repro picture frame collecting dust in our minimalist house.
The exception to this was a contribution to the ACLU given on our behalf. Hell yah! So that could be another route.
Really! If they don't have anything affordable-to-you on the registry, that's on them... and a nice card will be totally fine.
(Also, cash money or a Honeyfund contribution however small is totally not gauche these days. We were so grateful for just cold hard cash!)
Apologies for the ramble! Good luck and have fun!
posted by functionequalsform at 5:20 AM on July 24, 2017 [1 favorite]
I always pick the WEIRDEST thing on the registry. One time we bought an asparagus steamer; the groom loved it. Maybe $30?
posted by Ms Vegetable at 5:33 AM on July 24, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by Ms Vegetable at 5:33 AM on July 24, 2017 [3 favorites]
I also go the route of Ms Vegetable and get the weirdest thing on the registry under $50, unless I know them really well.
If they don't have a registry, or there is nothing fun enough, my default gift is a Pensey's Wedding 9-Jar Gift Box. It's unique, fun, and useful. They have larger gift box crates as well, in case you feel a need to spend more on the couple.
posted by RhysPenbras at 5:38 AM on July 24, 2017 [5 favorites]
If they don't have a registry, or there is nothing fun enough, my default gift is a Pensey's Wedding 9-Jar Gift Box. It's unique, fun, and useful. They have larger gift box crates as well, in case you feel a need to spend more on the couple.
posted by RhysPenbras at 5:38 AM on July 24, 2017 [5 favorites]
We got $15 checks from the old ladies at our church (every last one- I suspect collusion) for our wedding. I was charmed! Spend what you can afford.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 5:45 AM on July 24, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 5:45 AM on July 24, 2017 [4 favorites]
Ooooh, Penzey's spice gift boxes are a great idea. They have $20 and $30 options in addition to the one linked above.
I agree with the general consensus that gifts are not an obligation/spend what you can afford/etc. I've only spent more than $50 on wedding gifts for my absolute BFFs. For an acquaintance or distant cousin, it's usually $25-$30 from the registry. I live in the South.
posted by donajo at 6:47 AM on July 24, 2017
I agree with the general consensus that gifts are not an obligation/spend what you can afford/etc. I've only spent more than $50 on wedding gifts for my absolute BFFs. For an acquaintance or distant cousin, it's usually $25-$30 from the registry. I live in the South.
posted by donajo at 6:47 AM on July 24, 2017
Most couples these days build out their registries to accommodate varying levels of spendiness.
Yes! I have found this to be the case as well. Also, I have heard time and time again from friends who have gotten married that people always buy the fun-looking stuff, and the boring, utilitarian stuff is often what they actually need. So don't worry if you go with something simple!
posted by everybody had matching towels at 6:49 AM on July 24, 2017
Yes! I have found this to be the case as well. Also, I have heard time and time again from friends who have gotten married that people always buy the fun-looking stuff, and the boring, utilitarian stuff is often what they actually need. So don't worry if you go with something simple!
posted by everybody had matching towels at 6:49 AM on July 24, 2017
One way to think of this is paying for your plate. Your dinner will likely cost about $20 give or take. Then there is booze.
In my circles it would be unusual to invite someone with your relationship to the wedding. So speculating on your role might factor in too. If this is a huge wedding versus a small one.
posted by k8t at 7:12 AM on July 24, 2017
In my circles it would be unusual to invite someone with your relationship to the wedding. So speculating on your role might factor in too. If this is a huge wedding versus a small one.
posted by k8t at 7:12 AM on July 24, 2017
When I first started getting invited to weddings and was about in your place financially, I spent about $15-30. I did a garlic press with a mixing spoon (about $20 total) for one friend, and a starter grill kit for another friend ($25-ish).
Both things were on their registries and it was easy. The first friend has moved several times before and since their wedding, so the goal was light stuff that would be easy to pack or inexpensive enough to not feel bad if it didn't make the next cross-country move. The second friend is established in a city for now, but they're young and could move again!
For my wedding, we were trying very hard not to get too much "stuff" but we were older and more established at that time. So our registry was purposely light -- that meant most of our friends didn't get us anything, and that was just fine by me. We also got a couple of picture frames, which are nice, although I still haven't put pictures from the wedding (almost six months ago...) in them.
So small practical thing if you feel like you must give a gift, but a nice card is almost always appreciated and works for any occasion and price point.
posted by PearlRose at 7:21 AM on July 24, 2017
Both things were on their registries and it was easy. The first friend has moved several times before and since their wedding, so the goal was light stuff that would be easy to pack or inexpensive enough to not feel bad if it didn't make the next cross-country move. The second friend is established in a city for now, but they're young and could move again!
For my wedding, we were trying very hard not to get too much "stuff" but we were older and more established at that time. So our registry was purposely light -- that meant most of our friends didn't get us anything, and that was just fine by me. We also got a couple of picture frames, which are nice, although I still haven't put pictures from the wedding (almost six months ago...) in them.
So small practical thing if you feel like you must give a gift, but a nice card is almost always appreciated and works for any occasion and price point.
posted by PearlRose at 7:21 AM on July 24, 2017
Based on the gifts at our wedding, $25 is fine (even if you're a doctor married to another doctor, or a mid-level insurance exec with a million-dollar home).
Spend what you can afford to. Any couple that expects more than that is petty.
posted by notsnot at 7:35 AM on July 24, 2017
Spend what you can afford to. Any couple that expects more than that is petty.
posted by notsnot at 7:35 AM on July 24, 2017
One way to think of this is paying for your plate. Your dinner will likely cost about $20 give or take.
Don't do this. Weddings are not quid pro quo. You invite people to share the party you're throwing.
posted by anastasiav at 9:06 AM on July 24, 2017 [10 favorites]
Don't do this. Weddings are not quid pro quo. You invite people to share the party you're throwing.
posted by anastasiav at 9:06 AM on July 24, 2017 [10 favorites]
Ok, I'm sure this doesn't reflect extremely well on me, but it's the truth: We received a few like, 30-40$ presents for our wedding, and I thought it was really tasteless. Not as tasteless as nothing, but tasteless. If you want to do this, I would say don't go from the registry, as they know how much stuff costs there, and maybe spend a little time trying to really find something unique and getting it nicely wrapped with a very thoughtful note. A nice serving platter wrapped in an unmarked box could be good...?
(edit: I'd feel differently if I knew people were really going through financial hardships, which no one at our wedding really was, so take this with a grain of salt. We're also in SF, not the midwest, so standards may be totally off. e.g. the product manager at Facebook who gave us a 40$ gift card? yeahhhh)
posted by namesarehard at 10:14 AM on July 24, 2017
(edit: I'd feel differently if I knew people were really going through financial hardships, which no one at our wedding really was, so take this with a grain of salt. We're also in SF, not the midwest, so standards may be totally off. e.g. the product manager at Facebook who gave us a 40$ gift card? yeahhhh)
posted by namesarehard at 10:14 AM on July 24, 2017
Please don't spend all of your disposable income for the month; $30-$40 worth of stuff on the registry is completely fine in this situation.
Like everything else related to weddings, people have all kinds of opinions about this. I am but one tiny dot of data in this particular vast sea of hot takes, but it's my firmly held opinion that while standard broad strokes of etiquette exists for a reason and should be observed, weddings are not a financial transaction where the goal of all parties is to expend equal amounts. It is of course possible in this situation that the bride and groom will then cross-check the value of each person's gift against their current salary, stock holdings, and life insurance and adjust their opinion of their guests accordingly but honestly that reflects on them, not you.
You sound thoughtful and I hope you have a fun time!
posted by superfluousm at 10:32 AM on July 24, 2017 [1 favorite]
Like everything else related to weddings, people have all kinds of opinions about this. I am but one tiny dot of data in this particular vast sea of hot takes, but it's my firmly held opinion that while standard broad strokes of etiquette exists for a reason and should be observed, weddings are not a financial transaction where the goal of all parties is to expend equal amounts. It is of course possible in this situation that the bride and groom will then cross-check the value of each person's gift against their current salary, stock holdings, and life insurance and adjust their opinion of their guests accordingly but honestly that reflects on them, not you.
You sound thoughtful and I hope you have a fun time!
posted by superfluousm at 10:32 AM on July 24, 2017 [1 favorite]
If there are $15, $25, and $40 items on their registry, I suggest you purchase one or a few items that meet your threshold of possibility... do not go broke. Weddings are like the parable of the beggar giving a copper and it being a more significant contribution than the sacks of gold the wealthy gave.
Give what you can, be a good guest at the wedding, expect nothing in return. When you are getting married in the future, show empathy for those who spend what they can for your wedding.
posted by Nanukthedog at 10:41 AM on July 24, 2017
Give what you can, be a good guest at the wedding, expect nothing in return. When you are getting married in the future, show empathy for those who spend what they can for your wedding.
posted by Nanukthedog at 10:41 AM on July 24, 2017
do not go broke
Strongly endorsed! I very fondly remember who gave us various pleasing small items from our registry, 10+ years later. Don't feel bad about getting something small! I also have no memory of who might not have gotten around to getting us anything.
posted by redfoxtail at 10:59 AM on July 24, 2017
Strongly endorsed! I very fondly remember who gave us various pleasing small items from our registry, 10+ years later. Don't feel bad about getting something small! I also have no memory of who might not have gotten around to getting us anything.
posted by redfoxtail at 10:59 AM on July 24, 2017
Buy a thoughtful gift and write a thoughtful card. You are not at all required to use all your discretionary money. You know them, so if there is something you can think of that would be special, go for it. The year I made my Mom a sand jar with sand, beach glass, shells, etc, in a mason jar with a painted lid, she actually loved it because she grew up partly in Maine and lived in Ohio. If you know they looove particular foods, a basket is fun. If you are crafty, there are options, but you have to do a good job. In addition to your gift, can you make an 'Chris & Terry' banner in their theme colors or cool fabric? One of my favorite gifts was the time spent by the friend who helped me write thank you notes.
posted by theora55 at 12:11 PM on July 24, 2017
posted by theora55 at 12:11 PM on July 24, 2017
Don't give anything more than what you can afford comfortably.
Wedding gifts: you should expect to give them but you shouldn't expect to get them. Let alone turning one's nose up at gifts of less than the expected value. If the newlyweds don't understand this, that's on them.
posted by grouse at 12:52 PM on July 24, 2017 [2 favorites]
Wedding gifts: you should expect to give them but you shouldn't expect to get them. Let alone turning one's nose up at gifts of less than the expected value. If the newlyweds don't understand this, that's on them.
posted by grouse at 12:52 PM on July 24, 2017 [2 favorites]
I gave my best friend for whom I was her "best person" a re-gifted cast iron skillet as her wedding present. It was something I knew she would love and use, she didn't have a registry, and she didn't know it was a re-gift. We were both post-college, underemployed people, though, so I bet she would have understood if she did know.
Spend what you can afford and feel not one whit of guilt. If what you can afford is a really beautiful card? Write out something heartfelt and lovely and feel ZERO GUILT.
posted by carrioncomfort at 1:27 PM on July 24, 2017
Spend what you can afford and feel not one whit of guilt. If what you can afford is a really beautiful card? Write out something heartfelt and lovely and feel ZERO GUILT.
posted by carrioncomfort at 1:27 PM on July 24, 2017
If the couple has put $20 and $30 items on their registry, they surely expect some guests will be on a tight budget. Many of my wedding guests were retired or elderly and on a fixed income. Others were in school and on no income. I certainly didn't expect that everyone would be able to spend the same amount on a gift!
posted by Knowyournuts at 5:30 PM on July 24, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by Knowyournuts at 5:30 PM on July 24, 2017 [1 favorite]
(I'd feel differently if I knew people were really going through financial hardships, which no one at our wedding really was, so take this with a grain of salt. We're also in SF, not the midwest, so standards may be totally off. e.g. the product manager at Facebook who gave us a 40$ gift card? yeahhhh)
For all you know, the product manager at Facebook is paying for 24-hour care for her elderly mother-in-law and $40 is a splurge for her right now.
OP, I (born and bred midwesterner) agree with "the small items are on the registry for a reason".
posted by shiny blue object at 6:13 PM on July 24, 2017 [7 favorites]
For all you know, the product manager at Facebook is paying for 24-hour care for her elderly mother-in-law and $40 is a splurge for her right now.
OP, I (born and bred midwesterner) agree with "the small items are on the registry for a reason".
posted by shiny blue object at 6:13 PM on July 24, 2017 [7 favorites]
I wasn't going to chime in but given some of the discussion - I would have much rather any friends on budgets spend within their means and have a great time - it's a celebration! Not a gift grab! Go, have fun, dance, hug.
posted by warriorqueen at 9:34 PM on July 24, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by warriorqueen at 9:34 PM on July 24, 2017 [1 favorite]
Chiming in with a possibly great gift idea...we got married right out of college. One of our friends framed our wedding invitation for us. You could go to Michaels, get a nice frame for very cheap and frame it. We loved it--and it's in our house nearly 15 years later.
PS...no one should invite you to their wedding with the expectation of a gift that costs a certain amount. If they do, I don't think you need to worry about their feelings. Go, and have lots of fun!!
posted by fyrebelley at 1:20 PM on July 25, 2017 [1 favorite]
PS...no one should invite you to their wedding with the expectation of a gift that costs a certain amount. If they do, I don't think you need to worry about their feelings. Go, and have lots of fun!!
posted by fyrebelley at 1:20 PM on July 25, 2017 [1 favorite]
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I don't think the bride and groom would feel great imagining you really white-knuckling it to buy them a $100 gift and also pay your rent.
If they're smart, they will have registries with inexpensive items, too. Sometimes as a cheeky joke I like to buy something incredibly utilitarian off a wedding registry (say, salt and pepper shakers) and in the note say "Please think of me EVERY TIME you use this." Feel free to steal that joke.
But yeah—don't break the bank. It'll be okay. Sure, maybe the couple will be petty and remember this if/when your wedding comes along and it's their turn to buy you a gift... but man. Life's too short.
posted by Zephyrial at 9:27 PM on July 23, 2017 [25 favorites]