Why does my one year old wake up and scream when I sit down with her?
July 10, 2017 6:32 AM   Subscribe

I have a one year old. Sometimes when she wakes up after a nap or around three thirty in the morning, she'll go back to sleep if I hold her and walk around or stand still or even sit with her perpendicular to the ground, but as soon as put her on my shoulder or chest and lean back at all she wakes up and arches her back and screams. It's making me crazy. Why does she does this and what can I do to stop it?

I don't think the issue is something like an ear infection or acid reflux because she's sleeping fine otherwise, it's just she won't go back to sleep unless she's upright. Sometimes if, e.g., I nurse her, she'll fall back asleep and then I can put her on my chest and she'll sleep like that for another hour or so, but if I go straight from getting her out of her crib when she wakes up to holding her and trying to lie back she shrieks like she's in pain. She also sort of scrabbles at me with her little feed like she's trying to run or climb a mountain or something. I've tried to google this but I just get information about when a baby won't sleep when s/he lies down which is not the problem as she goes to sleep quite easily at bedtime, the issue is just when she wakes up.

My questions:

1) Why is she doing this?
2) Does it mean that something is wrong?
3) What, if anything, can I do to stop it? Normally she loves being held so this is perplexing.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl to Pets & Animals (16 answers total)
 
My first thought is that, being drowsy and not fully aware, she feels like she's falling. The scrabbling might also be from a feeling of falling. I've woken up myself, in bed, with a feeling of falling - it is scary, and I believe it's a common dream/nightmare.

Not a baby person, so if this is some special baby-only thing, I wouldn't know.
posted by amtho at 6:49 AM on July 10, 2017


she shrieks like she's in pain

Most likely cause for that is that she's in pain.

Maybe some gas-related digestive tract issue?
posted by flabdablet at 6:51 AM on July 10, 2017 [1 favorite]


Don't be so quick to discount reflux as it could be that's what's waking her up to begin with. Reflux in babies doesn't necessarily mean vomiting, it can also manifest in something called 'silent reflux' which is just as painful.
posted by PorcineWithMe at 7:09 AM on July 10, 2017 [5 favorites]


Response by poster: Thanks for the answers so far -- just to clarify, I'm putting her down to sleep at seven pm and she's sleeping until three thirty or four (she'll usually wake up once or twice before that, make some sleepy baby noises, and go back to sleep). As soon as I put her down in her crib for bedtime she rolls onto her tummy and sleeps that way for hours.

What's happening is that when she wakes up after her nap or at four am I am then her up and holding her more or less upright while she leans her head on my shoulder. If I then sit and tilt her at all, including lying her on top of me on either her back or tummy or even just reclining slightly, the screaming begins. It stops when I sit back up and soothe her with pettings and "sh sh shhhhh"s.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 7:31 AM on July 10, 2017


Oh, this brings back memories. I became expert at doing a slow motion limbo and still I couldn't fool my kid. Of course, after sleeping so long, her little tummy is empty and she's starving, so take care of that. The best solution we ever found was to walk outside (yes, at 3am); the change of air temp. made 'em snuggle in that much harder and burp and finally sleep.

At least yours isn't waking up all chipper and ready to take on the world and demanding to play, so you've got a chance.
posted by at at 7:46 AM on July 10, 2017 [1 favorite]


Seconding walk outside. Streetlights are fascinating and so is the moon.
posted by Mr. Yuck at 8:22 AM on July 10, 2017


Response by poster: She goes back to sleep if I hold her perfectly upright, even if we stay in our apartment. The issue is that I can't lie back or even sit down unless I hold her completely vertically.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 8:25 AM on July 10, 2017


I doubt it's reflux all of the sudden in a one-year old, but I definitely think that an ear infection could be the culprit, even if baby is going to sleep just fine. It doesn't necessarily start to hurt until sometime during the night. My 4-year old gets terrible ear infections but I have to be vigilant for the signs because he doesn't complain. In his case, whenever behavior issues begin it's probably an ear infection, with the behavior linked to poor sleep that I'm not even aware has been poor even though I have a baby monitor on him all night. Don't be so sure that it's not an ear infection just because baby mostly sleeps ok.
posted by amro at 8:39 AM on July 10, 2017 [2 favorites]


Even if it's not reflux maybe it's just a little sour stomach.
Maybe give her a little bit to eat or some milk.

Sometimes I wake up with a sour stomach and some toast makes me feel better.
posted by littlewater at 8:39 AM on July 10, 2017


I would definitely explore the reflux, earache, and gas possibilities. Unexplained screaming in the night we almost always finally tried some gas relief drops and that worked more often than not. The other thing is possibly she just really likes being held by mama at that moment and she senses she's about to be put down whenever you move her out of the vertical position. I remember complaining to my doctor when my son was around eight months old that he only wanted to sleep on me, and she said, "well wouldn't you?" I don't really have a solution for that, but as with all things baby-related, this too will eventually pass.
posted by JenMarie at 9:30 AM on July 10, 2017 [1 favorite]


My kid used to do this. Drove me crazy. My theory (joking around) was that he wanted me to be standing up and ready to flee if a pack of wolves or other predators ambushed us. I found that sitting on a yoga ball and gently bouncing with him worked and was more tolerable than standing up for as long as it took sometimes for him to get back to deep sleep.
posted by umbĂș at 10:06 AM on July 10, 2017 [1 favorite]


We went through a phase with my second where he would sleep most of the night, then wake up around 4-5 am and still be really tired, but not want to lay back down. Our solution was to put him in a baby swing in his room and he would sleep in that for another hour, sometimes longer. I don't know if that's a great suggestion, but it did work for us for a few months until he naturally started to be able to sleep the entire night.
posted by areaperson at 10:16 AM on July 10, 2017


How long has this been going on? The only indication, usually, that either of my kids has an ear infection is inability to go BACK to sleep on their own.
posted by lydhre at 11:39 AM on July 10, 2017


A friend of mine with a six-month-old just mentioned to me that Baby will absolutely not go to sleep unless he is bounced by Parent on yoga ball and laid down in a very specific way in his crib. He won't sleep for others either only for them. The same for eating. My impression was that, knowing the parents as I do, (one is an introvert, the other has certain genetic issues) the baby may be having anxiety if the routine is changed even a little.
posted by Crystal Fox at 12:31 PM on July 10, 2017


It may be that the leaning back in the chair indicates that you are getting tired and the nighttime holding time is about to end. Does a rocking chair make any difference? Maybe try holding her so she's facing away from you and see if that makes a difference. Poor you, no sleep. Good luck.
posted by theora55 at 4:29 PM on July 10, 2017


We recently had a similar issue with our eight month old. He would do a swallowing action
before ending up crying. The doctor looked and said he had a infection in his throat
(probably caused when the kid swallowed a bit of bath-water).

This caused something (sputum ? i forgot the word she used) to block his throat when lying
horizontally, but not when we hold him up.
posted by dvr at 10:24 PM on July 10, 2017


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