Pets for family that travels
June 10, 2017 5:12 AM Subscribe
My son wants a pet. My wife and I are considering it. However, our family is out of the country for 8 - 10 weeks per year over the summer. Assuming we find a pet-sitter to come by the house while we are gone what are our options?
Yeah, that would be way too long to be away from a cat or a dog, but another animal might work.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 5:31 AM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 5:31 AM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: We were thinking cat or dog, something friendly and (at least semi) social.
@roomthreeseventeen - such as?
posted by askmehow at 5:32 AM on June 10, 2017
@roomthreeseventeen - such as?
posted by askmehow at 5:32 AM on June 10, 2017
there are some pet sitting online services (which i am considering as a remote worker, pet lover and potential sitter) that purport to help here, but i don't have any direct experiences with them. depending on your location this might be very attractive, as obviously if you can afford that much travel it's very likely you have a nice place too.
also, (most) cats don't care so i wouldn't worry too much on that account, although i would take it into consideration when picking one out. that might be too long for a dog though.
posted by lescour at 5:43 AM on June 10, 2017
also, (most) cats don't care so i wouldn't worry too much on that account, although i would take it into consideration when picking one out. that might be too long for a dog though.
posted by lescour at 5:43 AM on June 10, 2017
Depending on which country you go to, it might be possible to bring a pet with you for a trip of that duration. Are you staying in a summer home, or visiting family, where it would be possible to bring a dog or a very calm cat?
posted by third word on a random page at 5:53 AM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by third word on a random page at 5:53 AM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: We stay with family, 0% chance of bringing the pet with.
posted by askmehow at 5:55 AM on June 10, 2017
posted by askmehow at 5:55 AM on June 10, 2017
Best answer: Beta Fish. I find them to be incredibly social, easy to care for, do not require a filter (just a large enough tank) and they're just great. Not so great if your son wants something to cuddle...
A cat might be OK, but cats who are bonded to you REALLY dislike when you leave them alone. Ask me how I know.
Teddy Bear Hamster or similar might be middle ground, they don't live too long. It's important to make sure they have enough toys and exercise. IMHE, they don't bond to an individual quite the way cats or dogs do, but they are more tactile than beta fish. Beta Fish are more social with you, but your son might not care about that if he can't touch or pet a fish.
Hope that helps.
posted by jbenben at 5:55 AM on June 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
A cat might be OK, but cats who are bonded to you REALLY dislike when you leave them alone. Ask me how I know.
Teddy Bear Hamster or similar might be middle ground, they don't live too long. It's important to make sure they have enough toys and exercise. IMHE, they don't bond to an individual quite the way cats or dogs do, but they are more tactile than beta fish. Beta Fish are more social with you, but your son might not care about that if he can't touch or pet a fish.
Hope that helps.
posted by jbenben at 5:55 AM on June 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
Best answer: By definition, any social animal is going to need more companionship than a once a day visit over the two months. Many dogs can handle twice per day for a few days, but at least overnight if you’re away for weeks at a time. Cats can do fine for once per day for a while but even the most aloof cat will get lonely (and probably mess up your house) if you do that for 2 months. If you’re not prepared to have someone stay at your house with them or bring them with you then you should go with a pet that really doesn’t care about human companionship like a reptile or a fish.
Depending on where you live you should be able to find overnight pet sitting services but it’s not cheap. We pay the woman that is staying at our house right now (we’re away for the weekend) $100/night plus tip. But we don’t worry at all about our very social dog or our home so it’s totally worth it. I’d guess for a two month stay you could negotiate a lower rate but you’d need to book way in advance.
posted by jshort at 5:58 AM on June 10, 2017 [8 favorites]
Depending on where you live you should be able to find overnight pet sitting services but it’s not cheap. We pay the woman that is staying at our house right now (we’re away for the weekend) $100/night plus tip. But we don’t worry at all about our very social dog or our home so it’s totally worth it. I’d guess for a two month stay you could negotiate a lower rate but you’d need to book way in advance.
posted by jshort at 5:58 AM on June 10, 2017 [8 favorites]
Best answer: 2-2.5 months is too long for a dog or a cat with a live-out pet sitting service. I disagree that most cats wouldn't care being alone in a house for 23 hours a day, for months at a time. A good family cat is social, and that's just not enough socialization long-term. But finding a live-in petsitter for such a long period of time could be a logistical nightmare. Personally, I think the two workable options would be a small dog and boarding situation where the dog gets lots of out-of-kennel time (either at a doggie daycare type facility or an independent dog boarder who takes in a limited number of clients into their own home--this can be a great situation and often cheaper than a regular boarding kennel--~$30/day in the DC area. Another alternative would be if you have a relative who would be able to take in an extra dog over the summer--for some people it'd be a big ask but for other people it could be "the more the merrier."
posted by drlith at 6:00 AM on June 10, 2017 [11 favorites]
posted by drlith at 6:00 AM on June 10, 2017 [11 favorites]
I think if you could always find someone to stay at your house for those 8 to 10 weeks and LIVE there, it would probably be OK. That's a tough thing to find, though. We go away a far amount of times and we pay $60 a night for our dog sitter to take our dog to their house to live with them. This is very expensive, obviously, but we couldn't leave her at a kennel, nor would you want to for 8 to 10 weeks.
If you have several close friends who can be relied on to stop in several times a week for 8 to 10 weeks, I think a low-key pet like a fish or a lizard would be fine. But again, that's a lot to ask of a friend.
posted by ancient star at 6:02 AM on June 10, 2017
If you have several close friends who can be relied on to stop in several times a week for 8 to 10 weeks, I think a low-key pet like a fish or a lizard would be fine. But again, that's a lot to ask of a friend.
posted by ancient star at 6:02 AM on June 10, 2017
A consideration about dogs: finding a kennel, boarding situation or friend to take in your dog becomes almost impossible if your dog has agression issues with other dogs. This is something that can develop over time so you wouldn't necessarily be able to rule it out when you adopt the dog. I had such a dog and the only solution for her was hiring someone to stay with her in my house when I was out of town.
posted by mcduff at 6:22 AM on June 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by mcduff at 6:22 AM on June 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
There are a lot of reasons why a ferret is a bad choice for many people, but you might want to at least consider the possibility. Ferrets are intelligent animals, similar to cats or dogs, but they're probably better able to handle a separation from their people and/or familiar surroundings than cats or dogs. They're bold and curious and, unlike cats, they like new things and new situations. They like interacting with people, but probably wouldn't freak out if their regular people were replaced by a new friendly person for a couple of months, especially if you had two of them and they still had each other to play and sleep with. Since they like exploring new places, you could look for a pet sitter who would take them into his/her own house and they should do fine with a pet sitter who was living at your house. I think if you had two of them they might be all right with a pet sitter who stopped by once a day - if they were free ranging in your house so they got enough exercise and entertainment. (People often keep ferrets caged for some or most of the day, because of the trouble they can get into when they're loose. But they can roam loose in an adequately ferret-proofed house.)
Drawbacks to ferrets:
They can be trained to use a litter box, but not with the consistency of cats. If they're loose in your house all day, you'll need more litter boxes than you would for a cat (because they're not willing to travel too far to get to one) and you should be prepared for some accidents.
They're very curious, very strong for their size, and shaped in a way that makes it easy for them to get through cracks and holes. They like to be inside or under things. So they will explore every inch of your house that they have access to and they will figure out access to places you hadn't imagined them getting into. They will chew on or dig at certain things.
They have a noticeable smell that you may not like. (I personally like it a lot.)
posted by Redstart at 6:30 AM on June 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
Drawbacks to ferrets:
They can be trained to use a litter box, but not with the consistency of cats. If they're loose in your house all day, you'll need more litter boxes than you would for a cat (because they're not willing to travel too far to get to one) and you should be prepared for some accidents.
They're very curious, very strong for their size, and shaped in a way that makes it easy for them to get through cracks and holes. They like to be inside or under things. So they will explore every inch of your house that they have access to and they will figure out access to places you hadn't imagined them getting into. They will chew on or dig at certain things.
They have a noticeable smell that you may not like. (I personally like it a lot.)
posted by Redstart at 6:30 AM on June 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
Best answer: I do dog sitting in my home via an online service. Depending on the size of the dog, medical requirements, etc, our service would average $35-40/day.
However, if someone wanted to leave a dog with me for the entire summer, that would then infringe on my ability to travel during that time. You might find people who would take your dog for that time frame but then they would fob the dog off on others (unknown to you) if they wanted to go out of town for a weekend. As for myself, I simply wouldn't take a booking that long. If I were even to consider it, it would be for an added premium, not for a discount based on length of stay.
And that's not even getting into bonding issues with the animal, nor legal issues about ownership or abandonment of the dog.
posted by vignettist at 6:35 AM on June 10, 2017 [6 favorites]
However, if someone wanted to leave a dog with me for the entire summer, that would then infringe on my ability to travel during that time. You might find people who would take your dog for that time frame but then they would fob the dog off on others (unknown to you) if they wanted to go out of town for a weekend. As for myself, I simply wouldn't take a booking that long. If I were even to consider it, it would be for an added premium, not for a discount based on length of stay.
And that's not even getting into bonding issues with the animal, nor legal issues about ownership or abandonment of the dog.
posted by vignettist at 6:35 AM on June 10, 2017 [6 favorites]
Once-a-day visiting is absolutely not sufficient for a pet cat. We left our TWO cats (so, they had each other) for a week over the holidays with a pet-sitter coming every day to care for them and play with them. That was the longest we've ever left them without live-in pet-sitting and one of our cats developed a stress-related condition while we were away. We felt awful about it.
Perhaps a previously-feral cat would be OK with the arrangement, but if you're looking for a cuddly/friendly pet, absolutely not doable.
posted by Cygnet at 7:55 AM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
Perhaps a previously-feral cat would be OK with the arrangement, but if you're looking for a cuddly/friendly pet, absolutely not doable.
posted by Cygnet at 7:55 AM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
I sublet from a family who traveled for that long in the summer, which included cat- and fish-sitting. If you're in a town with colleges, there's probably a summer sublet market - I was moving to the town I went to grad school in and didn't want to make a separate trip out to find an apartment.
However, this seemed to be pretty stressful for the homeowners, as I didn't have any flexibility in my arrival date and they got friends to petsit for the time between them leaving and me arriving. We had a skype interview, but never met in person. One cat was clearly pretty bummed her person was gone, but they were largely good about litterbox use and I'm good with cats, so it worked. They had had a previous subletter who did not treat the cats as well, so your mileage will definitely vary.
posted by momus_window at 7:59 AM on June 10, 2017
However, this seemed to be pretty stressful for the homeowners, as I didn't have any flexibility in my arrival date and they got friends to petsit for the time between them leaving and me arriving. We had a skype interview, but never met in person. One cat was clearly pretty bummed her person was gone, but they were largely good about litterbox use and I'm good with cats, so it worked. They had had a previous subletter who did not treat the cats as well, so your mileage will definitely vary.
posted by momus_window at 7:59 AM on June 10, 2017
I have a friend who's very fond of my dog. He's a Jack Russell Terrier, not very big, easy to take care of, and she enjoys having him stay with her for several days at a time. I pay her, and we do reciprocal favors. If you want your child to have some of the fun of having a dog, you might be able to be that friend for somebody with a dog. I love animals, did as a kid, and horse-riding lessons were another way I got to spend time with animals.
posted by theora55 at 8:17 AM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by theora55 at 8:17 AM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
I actually think it might not be hard to find a free in-home petsitter. I petsit occasionally through a site called Trusted Housesitters; people on the site sit for free in exchange for free accommodation when they travel. Long sits are very common on the site (sometimes much longer than you're suggesting) and they always have plenty of applicants. Of course, it depends where you're located and how desirable it is as a place to visit at the time of year when you're traveling. Many of the housesitters on the site are retired. Others, like me, just work remotely and like to travel. I would say a cat might be slightly better than a dog, if your sitter might be out exploring during the day, since cats usually need less attention.
posted by pinochiette at 8:17 AM on June 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by pinochiette at 8:17 AM on June 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
Best answer: I'm going to go against the flow and say none. No pet. Until your lifestyle changes or your kid is old enough to say "nope, going to stay home this year", this is too long and too stressful a gap to subject a mammalian/avian pet to, and finding good, solid, reputable care for fish and reptiles is brutal. I'm not talking about a college student who'll dump in a handful of fish flakes and call it a day - I mean someone who genuinely understands the parameters of care and will work intelligently within them, which exotics absolutely need unless it's a significant milestone for your kid to come home to a dead pet.
Pets are not in the cards for you right now. Maybe you could foster animals for a local shelter when you're not away? Make sure your child understands you CANNOT foster fail on them, though.
P.S. Betta fish require a full tank, filter, and heater. They are no different from any other species in requiring good, safe care and like any fish, not a great idea for someone who will not be around to monitor them on an interested level.
posted by Nyx at 8:28 AM on June 10, 2017 [28 favorites]
Pets are not in the cards for you right now. Maybe you could foster animals for a local shelter when you're not away? Make sure your child understands you CANNOT foster fail on them, though.
P.S. Betta fish require a full tank, filter, and heater. They are no different from any other species in requiring good, safe care and like any fish, not a great idea for someone who will not be around to monitor them on an interested level.
posted by Nyx at 8:28 AM on June 10, 2017 [28 favorites]
Do you just leave your house empty for 8-10 weeks during the summer? That's something I would never do. Might as well hang out a sign asking to be burgled or wish for a pipe to leak undiscovered for a month.
If you don't leave the house empty, it's reasonably easy to get a combined live-in house- and pet-sitter. Depending on where you live, it's even possible to get a grad student or someone who will do this all for free (or some small amount of money) just to have a free place to live for a couple of months.
posted by slkinsey at 9:00 AM on June 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
If you don't leave the house empty, it's reasonably easy to get a combined live-in house- and pet-sitter. Depending on where you live, it's even possible to get a grad student or someone who will do this all for free (or some small amount of money) just to have a free place to live for a couple of months.
posted by slkinsey at 9:00 AM on June 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
My friends who do this get grad students to live in their place rent-free in exchange for taking care of the cat and dog.
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:36 AM on June 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:36 AM on June 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
If you could hypothetically find a friend to keep the fish for those months, it would be doable.
posted by k8t at 10:38 AM on June 10, 2017
posted by k8t at 10:38 AM on June 10, 2017
Best answer: I think you need to be thinking about worst scenarios here. This might work with a live in petsitter for a young healthy pet, but what happens when your pet gets old and/or sick? Are you okay with trusting your pet's emergency care to a random grad student, and are THEY okay with making the hard choices and with potentially laying out thousands of dollars for you to reimburse?
Maybe that's all okay, but I would think it through carefully first, as it seems you are doing.
posted by Stacey at 11:05 AM on June 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
Maybe that's all okay, but I would think it through carefully first, as it seems you are doing.
posted by Stacey at 11:05 AM on June 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
Best answer: Don't know about your son's expectations, but ant farms are cool.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 11:14 AM on June 10, 2017
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 11:14 AM on June 10, 2017
We did this for a number of years with a large dog. We were able to find free housesitters pretty easily because a) we were leaving for long stretches, making our place viable for somebody to live in for a while, and b) we live in a somewhat desirable urban area. We did end up tipping our sitters about $10/day because it seemed like the right thing to do.
This worked but it was stressful finding and vetting the sitters each year (some years we got repeats which was nice). Our dog seemed mildly stressed by it. And when she got old and sick, it became nearly impossible.
Now that our dog has passed away, we've talked about finding another pet but the stress of the travel situation has made us decide to wait indefinitely.
posted by wyzewoman at 1:23 PM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
This worked but it was stressful finding and vetting the sitters each year (some years we got repeats which was nice). Our dog seemed mildly stressed by it. And when she got old and sick, it became nearly impossible.
Now that our dog has passed away, we've talked about finding another pet but the stress of the travel situation has made us decide to wait indefinitely.
posted by wyzewoman at 1:23 PM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
My opinion is, if you're traveling that long every summer and cant ever bring the pet, you should stick to goldfish or turtles or something like that. Pets are family members! Leaving them behind every year for 2.5 months would be hard on everyone, especially the pet!!!
posted by WalkerWestridge at 1:36 PM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by WalkerWestridge at 1:36 PM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
I think fostering sounds like a great idea.
This said, I have a friend who does travel that much during the summer and it works out okay with her cats, but in order to do it, she:
Has a live-in housesitter with experience with pets--she pays for this service. (since she's gone so long, the sitter she has used the last few years uses her house as a base for walking other people's dogs)
Has arranged a home visit vet and leaves her credit card on file with them in case something happens.
Has pet owning friends on stand-by as a backup in case the sitter has a family emergency or something similar in case she needs to leave town.
posted by frumiousb at 3:42 PM on June 10, 2017
This said, I have a friend who does travel that much during the summer and it works out okay with her cats, but in order to do it, she:
Has a live-in housesitter with experience with pets--she pays for this service. (since she's gone so long, the sitter she has used the last few years uses her house as a base for walking other people's dogs)
Has arranged a home visit vet and leaves her credit card on file with them in case something happens.
Has pet owning friends on stand-by as a backup in case the sitter has a family emergency or something similar in case she needs to leave town.
posted by frumiousb at 3:42 PM on June 10, 2017
So, we do something similar to this. We have two cats. Most years we travel about a month (which is a bit different than two months, but still a very long time). It seems fine; cats are very healthy and happy, we have great relationships with them, etc.
Things that make it work:
1. We have always found reliable and free catsitters. We mostly use grad students (I'm a professor, so it's easy to find people who want free nice housing in exchange for taking care of two low-maintenance animals; very often they are people who want pets of their own but live in a rental or something that makes this infeasible). One time we couldn't find anyone we used a website similar to Trusted Housesitters and heavily vetted them. The process was a bit stressful but the person we settled on was lovely and the cats were very well-taken care of. One of the reasons this works is that we have a house that is genuinely a very nice place to live, so people actually wanted to do it.
2. They are cats, and there are two of them. They are also indoor/outdoor cats. All of these factors mean that us being gone was less bad than if they required more continuous socialisation from their humans.
3. They are healthy and low-maintenance. We will probably not be able to do this in seven years when they are more elderly, but right now they have no health problems to speak of and are extremely chill.
If you can make factors like this happen, I think this is totally feasible. But I agree that having anything other than someone living with them for that length of time is absolutely necessary.
posted by forza at 6:48 PM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
Things that make it work:
1. We have always found reliable and free catsitters. We mostly use grad students (I'm a professor, so it's easy to find people who want free nice housing in exchange for taking care of two low-maintenance animals; very often they are people who want pets of their own but live in a rental or something that makes this infeasible). One time we couldn't find anyone we used a website similar to Trusted Housesitters and heavily vetted them. The process was a bit stressful but the person we settled on was lovely and the cats were very well-taken care of. One of the reasons this works is that we have a house that is genuinely a very nice place to live, so people actually wanted to do it.
2. They are cats, and there are two of them. They are also indoor/outdoor cats. All of these factors mean that us being gone was less bad than if they required more continuous socialisation from their humans.
3. They are healthy and low-maintenance. We will probably not be able to do this in seven years when they are more elderly, but right now they have no health problems to speak of and are extremely chill.
If you can make factors like this happen, I think this is totally feasible. But I agree that having anything other than someone living with them for that length of time is absolutely necessary.
posted by forza at 6:48 PM on June 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
What forza says.
I did a lot of live-in catsitting when I was in my late 20s-early 30s, for people I knew from a nonprofit board and (once I'd proven myself reliable) for their friends.
I got a small stipend ($25 a week, IIRC) plus the space to myself and kitty time -- both much enjoyed, as I was then living with multiple housemates in a no-pets situation. The kitties' humans got the reassurance that their pets were being looked after by a cat lover who wasn't going to blow off administering the hairball remedy or scooping the litter box.
posted by virago at 11:50 AM on June 11, 2017
I did a lot of live-in catsitting when I was in my late 20s-early 30s, for people I knew from a nonprofit board and (once I'd proven myself reliable) for their friends.
I got a small stipend ($25 a week, IIRC) plus the space to myself and kitty time -- both much enjoyed, as I was then living with multiple housemates in a no-pets situation. The kitties' humans got the reassurance that their pets were being looked after by a cat lover who wasn't going to blow off administering the hairball remedy or scooping the litter box.
posted by virago at 11:50 AM on June 11, 2017
Does your kid have a best-friend who also wants a small pet? Maybe they could time-share a small mammal (gerbil, hamster, mice, guinea pig). Lives at your house 2 months, then friend's house, then your house... and you arrange with friend's parents that they get the pet for the summer? Or a three-way ownership pretty much guarantees that not everybody will be on vacation all at once.
posted by aimedwander at 8:51 AM on June 12, 2017
posted by aimedwander at 8:51 AM on June 12, 2017
I can't speak to cats, but I don't think this is workable for a dog. Sure, there are some people with dogs who can adjust to this, but you have no idea how the dog you choose will react.
We have one dog who loves people so much that he is happy as long as he has someone around. But we also have a dog who is extremely stressed by new people and the absence of her family. The last time we traveled it became evident that she doesn't "get used to" the new situation, but only get increasingly anxious the longer we're gone. So anxious that on the last day of our trip she finally snapped and attacked one of our other dogs.
We are working with a behaviorist and treating her anxiety with medication and training, but this seriously complicated our travel and dog care situation. This wasn't the first time we traveled - she had stayed with the same people twice last year for similar periods of time and was okay. So you have no way to know how a dog is going to react the first time or the tenth time you leave them with someone, and there is no guarantee you will get a dog who is able to adjust well to this situation.
As mentioned above, other things can complicate dog care like aggression towards other dogs, issues that come with age, etc. Aimedwander's suggestion of time-sharing a small mammal who doesn't get as attached to its humans is a better idea.
posted by thejanna at 11:12 AM on June 12, 2017
We have one dog who loves people so much that he is happy as long as he has someone around. But we also have a dog who is extremely stressed by new people and the absence of her family. The last time we traveled it became evident that she doesn't "get used to" the new situation, but only get increasingly anxious the longer we're gone. So anxious that on the last day of our trip she finally snapped and attacked one of our other dogs.
We are working with a behaviorist and treating her anxiety with medication and training, but this seriously complicated our travel and dog care situation. This wasn't the first time we traveled - she had stayed with the same people twice last year for similar periods of time and was okay. So you have no way to know how a dog is going to react the first time or the tenth time you leave them with someone, and there is no guarantee you will get a dog who is able to adjust well to this situation.
As mentioned above, other things can complicate dog care like aggression towards other dogs, issues that come with age, etc. Aimedwander's suggestion of time-sharing a small mammal who doesn't get as attached to its humans is a better idea.
posted by thejanna at 11:12 AM on June 12, 2017
This thread is closed to new comments.
I'll just give dog-specific device since we have three and do travel sometimes for shorter increments of time. I would recommend getting two dogs for consistency when your family is away (often shelters house already bonded pairs that would be lovely to keep together) and have the sitter actually stay at your house while you're away. Many college kids would be over the moon to stay somewhere with a real kitchen and washer/dryer in addition to puppy cuddles.
posted by Drosera at 5:29 AM on June 10, 2017 [4 favorites]