Cat injury, money problems, my mum needs me and I need her...
May 4, 2017 4:01 PM Subscribe
Hello everyone!
What should I do regarding my injured cat, my mum who needs my support right now, and my own issues including financial?
I've had quite a bad year, back to my eating disorder and think I'm depressed. I've been tutoring and will become a teacher in September where I will thankfully get paid by the government. This month financially has been difficult because I was doing jury service and it lasted a couple of weeks longer than expected, and didn't manage to get the money back because I am self employed, so all the hours I could have gotten from tutoring, I got $0 instead...
My mum lives in another country and in a very remote area, compared to where I live in a busy city. I am meant to go and spend the summer with her until I start my teaching course. I really need the peace and calm, there will be no internet, no distractions, I will do some volunteer work over there and spend time with my mum who just escaped an abusive relationship and we would support each other. This is the only time I will be able to spend so much time with her and am really excited for it. I was planning on going in two weeks time and she would also help look after me until I start getting paid in September as jury service has made me quite poor and it is very expensive in this city.
The other day in the middle of the night my cat was crying like I'd never heard her before. I was half asleep and thought she was upset because of the toxic smell as the flat had just been fumigated due to some sort of bug infestation. Then she disappeared outside for two or three days until she came back on Wednesday morning! She had a completely limp front leg, just awful to see, but she was bouncing with energy and very happy and affectionate with me. I put her in the cat box to take her to the vet and en route she broke through the box and outran me. After a few hours she came back to the home and I managed to finally take her to the vet.
After a series of injections and X-rays that amounted to almost $1,000, the vet told me she has broken her leg and will need to insert a metal rod and several screws inside, and it will amount to almost $6,000. Insurance will not cover it, I could get a loan and pay it back gradually, as right now I have probably $200 in my account. I grew up with several cats but have the most special bond with this cat. I tried looking for alternative vet surgeons but this specific operation that is needed is apparently quite unique and he said not many vets do it.
My whole family who are animal lovers think I should wait to see if she heals without the operation because she could get infected from the metal rod, and animals are strong and can mend themselves. They came to look at her and because she is in a good mood and running, compared to how she was on Sunday, they think I should wait a few days as she won't get worse (this was before she was put on painkillers and is also now in a cast). They say that the vet is ripping me off and that this is not life threatening but she will have the limp for life, although better than a potential risk of infection from the operation.
I am at a loss of what to do. I wish I could take kitty with me to be with my mum, but plane ticket, injection, health certificate etc, makes it not possible although she would be so happy there compared to where she is right now even though she loves being outdoors. I need peace and quiet away from this city, and it's the only opportunity I have because until September I have nothing fulfilling lined up in this city. I was looking forward to the volunteering with my mum. Also there is a very good doctor over there who helped me a few years ago, who was going to help me get over my depression at a family price and be away from this busy lifestyle, which my mum was going to pay for. I also want to be there for my mum and bond with her who is finally over years of abuse, and I always said I would be there for her when she decided to leave him.
But my cat is injured, not sure if she is able to get better without operation or not. I was thinking maybe of leaving at a later date, in a month instead of two weeks to see if she does improve. Or should I go ahead with the operation asap? What should I do? Thank you in advance.
I've had quite a bad year, back to my eating disorder and think I'm depressed. I've been tutoring and will become a teacher in September where I will thankfully get paid by the government. This month financially has been difficult because I was doing jury service and it lasted a couple of weeks longer than expected, and didn't manage to get the money back because I am self employed, so all the hours I could have gotten from tutoring, I got $0 instead...
My mum lives in another country and in a very remote area, compared to where I live in a busy city. I am meant to go and spend the summer with her until I start my teaching course. I really need the peace and calm, there will be no internet, no distractions, I will do some volunteer work over there and spend time with my mum who just escaped an abusive relationship and we would support each other. This is the only time I will be able to spend so much time with her and am really excited for it. I was planning on going in two weeks time and she would also help look after me until I start getting paid in September as jury service has made me quite poor and it is very expensive in this city.
The other day in the middle of the night my cat was crying like I'd never heard her before. I was half asleep and thought she was upset because of the toxic smell as the flat had just been fumigated due to some sort of bug infestation. Then she disappeared outside for two or three days until she came back on Wednesday morning! She had a completely limp front leg, just awful to see, but she was bouncing with energy and very happy and affectionate with me. I put her in the cat box to take her to the vet and en route she broke through the box and outran me. After a few hours she came back to the home and I managed to finally take her to the vet.
After a series of injections and X-rays that amounted to almost $1,000, the vet told me she has broken her leg and will need to insert a metal rod and several screws inside, and it will amount to almost $6,000. Insurance will not cover it, I could get a loan and pay it back gradually, as right now I have probably $200 in my account. I grew up with several cats but have the most special bond with this cat. I tried looking for alternative vet surgeons but this specific operation that is needed is apparently quite unique and he said not many vets do it.
My whole family who are animal lovers think I should wait to see if she heals without the operation because she could get infected from the metal rod, and animals are strong and can mend themselves. They came to look at her and because she is in a good mood and running, compared to how she was on Sunday, they think I should wait a few days as she won't get worse (this was before she was put on painkillers and is also now in a cast). They say that the vet is ripping me off and that this is not life threatening but she will have the limp for life, although better than a potential risk of infection from the operation.
I am at a loss of what to do. I wish I could take kitty with me to be with my mum, but plane ticket, injection, health certificate etc, makes it not possible although she would be so happy there compared to where she is right now even though she loves being outdoors. I need peace and quiet away from this city, and it's the only opportunity I have because until September I have nothing fulfilling lined up in this city. I was looking forward to the volunteering with my mum. Also there is a very good doctor over there who helped me a few years ago, who was going to help me get over my depression at a family price and be away from this busy lifestyle, which my mum was going to pay for. I also want to be there for my mum and bond with her who is finally over years of abuse, and I always said I would be there for her when she decided to leave him.
But my cat is injured, not sure if she is able to get better without operation or not. I was thinking maybe of leaving at a later date, in a month instead of two weeks to see if she does improve. Or should I go ahead with the operation asap? What should I do? Thank you in advance.
Can you follow up to say what you will do with the cat when you leave? Whether it's now or after the healing, you list the reasons you can't bring the cat with you, and the vet fees are not among them. So what is your dilemma?
posted by headnsouth at 4:15 PM on May 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by headnsouth at 4:15 PM on May 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
If not many vets do the operation, what do they do instead? I would look into that treatment.
posted by Jubey at 4:22 PM on May 4, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by Jubey at 4:22 PM on May 4, 2017 [2 favorites]
Response by poster: If she were to get operated, I would stay a couple of extra weeks to be with her. My brother would take my bedroom and be with her after that, as they get on and he is happy to stay here. My dilemma is that I am not sure if the operation is worth it, I am unsure if it is life threatening (vet said she would be crippled but didn't specify death), not sure if I should give up my original plan to stay with the cat instead.. Why should I not borrow $6000 to fix her leg?
posted by akita at 4:26 PM on May 4, 2017
posted by akita at 4:26 PM on May 4, 2017
Can you see another vet and ask for a second opinion?
posted by rainbowbrite at 4:31 PM on May 4, 2017 [6 favorites]
posted by rainbowbrite at 4:31 PM on May 4, 2017 [6 favorites]
Best answer: Even if it came down to worst case scenario of amputation, cats manage very well on three legs. It doesn't sound like you have great cash flow or an optimal life situation at the moment, so putting you under $6000 of financial stress on top of it all sounds like a terrible choice. I would ask for a second opinion on the cat.
posted by Jubey at 4:32 PM on May 4, 2017 [15 favorites]
posted by Jubey at 4:32 PM on May 4, 2017 [15 favorites]
Bringing kitty with you seems like the best course of action. You shouldn't need to buy a whole seat for her it's usually just a small fee. Can family help?
posted by bleep at 4:32 PM on May 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by bleep at 4:32 PM on May 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
Given the quote of 6000$, I would look for a second opinion on what is necessary for your furry friend. Ask you vet for the x-rays and take them with you (you have paid for them after all...). Perhaps a veterinary college nearby has a clinic where complex techniques are taught.
posted by Northbysomewhatcrazy at 4:33 PM on May 4, 2017 [6 favorites]
posted by Northbysomewhatcrazy at 4:33 PM on May 4, 2017 [6 favorites]
No to the $6000 surgery. That's a ridiculous amount of money to fix a broken leg- especially one that is already healing in a cast. Call another vet in your area and bring your cat in to them for a second opinion. Explain that money is extremely tight, but you want to do right by your cat within that constraint.
Consider also asking what steps you would have to take to bring your cat with you to your mother's country. Write it all down carefully, and take some time to think about it. It sounds like taking some time to relax at your mom's house would only be improved by having your beloved cat there with you. *hug*
posted by scrubjay at 5:10 PM on May 4, 2017 [3 favorites]
Consider also asking what steps you would have to take to bring your cat with you to your mother's country. Write it all down carefully, and take some time to think about it. It sounds like taking some time to relax at your mom's house would only be improved by having your beloved cat there with you. *hug*
posted by scrubjay at 5:10 PM on May 4, 2017 [3 favorites]
You should not move in with your mother. From your post history it appears that she abused you and enabled others to abuse you, and that she continued exploiting you in your adulthood, and that your realationship with her contributed to your mental health struggles and self harming behaviours.
posted by mikek at 5:19 PM on May 4, 2017 [12 favorites]
posted by mikek at 5:19 PM on May 4, 2017 [12 favorites]
Surgery sounds ridiculous. Is there a cheaper vet clinic in town? I know a friend who found a cheaper clinic by asking people at her dog park. I'm sure the vet is one of the few people who perform this kind of surgery, but it's not necessarily a surgery that needs to be done.
And, just thinking in terms of the worst case scenario-- Amputation isn't fun, but cats survive on three legs all the time. And (again) that's the worst case scenario-- as my mom's (old school) vet put it, provided that the limb isn't infected, you can always choose to amputate later.
posted by steady-state strawberry at 5:38 PM on May 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
And, just thinking in terms of the worst case scenario-- Amputation isn't fun, but cats survive on three legs all the time. And (again) that's the worst case scenario-- as my mom's (old school) vet put it, provided that the limb isn't infected, you can always choose to amputate later.
posted by steady-state strawberry at 5:38 PM on May 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
Why can they not just amputate her leg? that's what they would have done back in the day when putting metal rods in cats' legs was not a done thing. My cat had his leg amputated because of cancer and he was super fine. The amputation never even fazed him other than the actual surgical recovery.
posted by Medieval Maven at 6:35 PM on May 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by Medieval Maven at 6:35 PM on May 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
Best answer: You definitely need a second vet opinion - and let them know you would like to avoid the cost of surgery if possible. Up front.
I also echo what was said above about maybe a full summer with you mother not being the great idea it seems like just now. You do sound stressed and possibly depressed. If your mom has just exited an abusive relationship - even if not the one in which you were also abused - she may not be in any position to lend support to you, or really, you to her. It may be that your wishful expectations of a relaxing, healing summer aren't quite what it would be like. It would suck to address all of these issues, take off for what you think will be the whole summer, and find yourself in misery, stuck, and broke.
What about planning a decent-length trip, say 2 weeks, later in the summer? It would cost less, and you could spend more time near the cat as it heals. You'd still be able to relax. If you need to detox from the internet and other demands, plan that structure into your summer alternatively.
Just some ideas. You don't have to do the all-or-nothing choice in any aspect of this plan at all. Also, you don't have to decide right this second. The only thing really urgent is ensuring the cat is not in pain and that you are doing what it takes to heal her - and you. Everything else can wait until you are juggling at least one fewer consideration.
posted by Miko at 6:46 PM on May 4, 2017 [5 favorites]
I also echo what was said above about maybe a full summer with you mother not being the great idea it seems like just now. You do sound stressed and possibly depressed. If your mom has just exited an abusive relationship - even if not the one in which you were also abused - she may not be in any position to lend support to you, or really, you to her. It may be that your wishful expectations of a relaxing, healing summer aren't quite what it would be like. It would suck to address all of these issues, take off for what you think will be the whole summer, and find yourself in misery, stuck, and broke.
What about planning a decent-length trip, say 2 weeks, later in the summer? It would cost less, and you could spend more time near the cat as it heals. You'd still be able to relax. If you need to detox from the internet and other demands, plan that structure into your summer alternatively.
Just some ideas. You don't have to do the all-or-nothing choice in any aspect of this plan at all. Also, you don't have to decide right this second. The only thing really urgent is ensuring the cat is not in pain and that you are doing what it takes to heal her - and you. Everything else can wait until you are juggling at least one fewer consideration.
posted by Miko at 6:46 PM on May 4, 2017 [5 favorites]
Agree with second opinion. Even just by calling veterinary offices. The price seems higher than I would expect, and unless there's something unusual involved, surgery to add a stabilising pin is not that rare. One of my childhood cats was hit by a car and had a pin inserted; this was 1985. My parents weren't such crazy cat people that they would have elected for the surgery if it were something extreme (or super expensive relative to their small income at the time, although of course costs have changed since new tech and services were developed). Incidentally, he lived a good twelve years after that.
I've been in a similar position but ultimately this is not a life-saving operation, unless I'm missing something. If it would take you more than a year to pay off the $6k, without starving yourself or doing anything else drastic, I really really would not advise you put yourself at risk of long-term financial insecurity for this.
posted by notquitemaryann at 7:01 PM on May 4, 2017 [2 favorites]
I've been in a similar position but ultimately this is not a life-saving operation, unless I'm missing something. If it would take you more than a year to pay off the $6k, without starving yourself or doing anything else drastic, I really really would not advise you put yourself at risk of long-term financial insecurity for this.
posted by notquitemaryann at 7:01 PM on May 4, 2017 [2 favorites]
I am a licensed veterinary technician who performs anesthesia on a daily basis for surgical cases, and I work regularly with an orthopedic surgeon. The orthopedic surgeon I work with has taken on cases over the years were patients require surgery to fix severely deformed limbs that have resulted from not being appropriately treated at the time of the initial fracture. Generally these animals require surgery because their fracture, which was not appropriately treated, healed in such a way as to cause this animal to have an abnormal gait and posture which causes stress, pain, and recurring trauma to the affected limb as well as their other limbs. From what you have described in your question, and from my own personal experience, this is not a situation where it is appropriate for you try and let this heal at home. If surgery was recommended, I'm making an informed guess that the cast your cat has on now was placed to stabilize the fracture and provide pain relief, not as a method to help heal and correct the fracture.
I think you should look for an alternative veterinary surgeon, or a low cost veterinary clinic. I live and work in a large, expensive city, and I have seen cats undergo $6,000 specialized orthopedic procedures, but I have also seen these cats referred low cost clinics for surgical correction. If you want to MeMail with what city you are in I can try and help you research some options.
posted by OsoMeaty at 7:25 PM on May 4, 2017 [18 favorites]
I think you should look for an alternative veterinary surgeon, or a low cost veterinary clinic. I live and work in a large, expensive city, and I have seen cats undergo $6,000 specialized orthopedic procedures, but I have also seen these cats referred low cost clinics for surgical correction. If you want to MeMail with what city you are in I can try and help you research some options.
posted by OsoMeaty at 7:25 PM on May 4, 2017 [18 favorites]
Best answer: And whatever you do, do not just leave the cast on, and go back and see a vet when it is convenient for you, or leave it on until it seems healed to you. I can't tell you how many horror stories I have about well intentioned owners who have thought they would just leave the cast or the bandage on until their pet was "better." Often these stories end with amputation.
posted by OsoMeaty at 7:31 PM on May 4, 2017 [11 favorites]
posted by OsoMeaty at 7:31 PM on May 4, 2017 [11 favorites]
I had a vet tell me a while back that "if you put two pieces of a cat's bone in a room together, they will heal" so this to me seems very extravagant. I think it is a tough decision and I don't envy you having to make it, but I would recommend amputation.
posted by turbid dahlia at 7:47 PM on May 4, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by turbid dahlia at 7:47 PM on May 4, 2017 [2 favorites]
How old is your cat?
posted by AugustWest at 9:21 PM on May 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by AugustWest at 9:21 PM on May 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Thank you all for your replies. I've been taking care of her, she seems very happy but desperate to get outside and trying to break open the catflap, so I've had to barricade it.
I am going to take her to a low income type of vet surgeon on Monday and see if I qualify for their service. The expensive operation is meant to take place on Tuesday but I think I will cancel it and look around at other places. Worst case scenario, it may be a couple of weeks until operation or until a decision is made. How long is a cat able to be left like this with a fractured limb?
posted by akita at 6:23 AM on May 5, 2017 [1 favorite]
I am going to take her to a low income type of vet surgeon on Monday and see if I qualify for their service. The expensive operation is meant to take place on Tuesday but I think I will cancel it and look around at other places. Worst case scenario, it may be a couple of weeks until operation or until a decision is made. How long is a cat able to be left like this with a fractured limb?
posted by akita at 6:23 AM on May 5, 2017 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: She's two and a half years old, and loves being outdoors
posted by akita at 6:25 AM on May 5, 2017
posted by akita at 6:25 AM on May 5, 2017
Best answer: How long is a cat able to be left like this with a fractured limb?
The bones will take about 6 weeks to heal. Surgery could still be done at any time but would probably have a less optimal result after the bones had already healed, because they would presumably be healed in a malpositioned manner (given that your vet doesn't think the cast will be enough to keep them aligned properly during the healing process). You can ask your vet about the details of what to expect depending on when the surgery would end up being done - I am sure they are very familiar with dealing with people needing to postpone surgeries because of cost issues.
I'm a human doctor and not a cat doctor, but I saw a patient once who was a Christian Scientist and didn't believe in modern medical treatment. He shattered his foot in an accident at home and proceeded to continue walking on it for months. The x-ray was horrifying. He was still recommended for immediate surgery on it, although surely the result was not as good as if he had gone in a timely fashion.
posted by treehorn+bunny at 1:45 AM on May 6, 2017 [1 favorite]
The bones will take about 6 weeks to heal. Surgery could still be done at any time but would probably have a less optimal result after the bones had already healed, because they would presumably be healed in a malpositioned manner (given that your vet doesn't think the cast will be enough to keep them aligned properly during the healing process). You can ask your vet about the details of what to expect depending on when the surgery would end up being done - I am sure they are very familiar with dealing with people needing to postpone surgeries because of cost issues.
I'm a human doctor and not a cat doctor, but I saw a patient once who was a Christian Scientist and didn't believe in modern medical treatment. He shattered his foot in an accident at home and proceeded to continue walking on it for months. The x-ray was horrifying. He was still recommended for immediate surgery on it, although surely the result was not as good as if he had gone in a timely fashion.
posted by treehorn+bunny at 1:45 AM on May 6, 2017 [1 favorite]
One thing to keep in mind is that generally animal casts are not designed to stay on through the whole healing process without the inner bandaging being changed and the leg being checked periodically. Casts are usually changed under sedation every week, maybe every 2 weeks at a stretch. This is to help prevent bandage/cast complications.
Cats can't tell us if the cast is rubbing, painful, if they are losing sensation in the limb, etc, so the cast needs removal for inspection of the leg and then reapplication to prevent potentially catastrophic complications (which can include serious skin sloughing or even necrosis/death of the toes). Casts are usually pre-cut in half to facilitate this (then taped/bandaged back together whilst the cast is in situ). I've seen photos on veterinary forums of complications from improperly applied bandages and bandages/casts left on too long where the damage resulted in the limb needing amputation.
Unfortunely the costs of cast changes, sedations, and follow up X-rays can add up too.
posted by peanut butter milkshake at 8:55 AM on May 6, 2017
Cats can't tell us if the cast is rubbing, painful, if they are losing sensation in the limb, etc, so the cast needs removal for inspection of the leg and then reapplication to prevent potentially catastrophic complications (which can include serious skin sloughing or even necrosis/death of the toes). Casts are usually pre-cut in half to facilitate this (then taped/bandaged back together whilst the cast is in situ). I've seen photos on veterinary forums of complications from improperly applied bandages and bandages/casts left on too long where the damage resulted in the limb needing amputation.
Unfortunely the costs of cast changes, sedations, and follow up X-rays can add up too.
posted by peanut butter milkshake at 8:55 AM on May 6, 2017
Response by poster: Update: the cat is in hospital now, I managed to get her in a low income vet surgery thank god :) was very stressful but they will do what's best for the cat.
I am going to be with my mum for two months, once the cat is better. I know we have had problems for a long time, but for the past year or slightly more she has come very very far and I've forgiven her, we have grown very close and I feel strong enough to go there and bond. Thank you all for your help xxxx
posted by akita at 6:40 AM on May 8, 2017
I am going to be with my mum for two months, once the cat is better. I know we have had problems for a long time, but for the past year or slightly more she has come very very far and I've forgiven her, we have grown very close and I feel strong enough to go there and bond. Thank you all for your help xxxx
posted by akita at 6:40 AM on May 8, 2017
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by lyssabee at 4:14 PM on May 4, 2017 [17 favorites]