Tell me it’s not a tumor… memory problems edition
April 23, 2017 8:05 AM Subscribe
I’m a healthy (no medications or conditions) not yet 40 year old person who has recently begun to experience memory lapses, mostly around forgetting where I’m supposed to be, or tasks I should have completed. Prior to the past few months, my memory was very good.
Some examples of what I am experiencing: I’m forgetting about ad hoc meetings or appointments. Though I use my iphone calendar extensively, I have always been good at keeping my schedule in my head, at least the current day plus a couple of days out. Last Thursday I reviewed my work schedule first thing at 8am, then forgot to go to the 9am ad hoc meeting until a colleague asked me if I was attending. I also completely forgot about a dentist appointment that was also in my calendar, a few weeks back. Just this morning, I was supposed to drive kiddo to an event, and totally forgot about it. If you had asked me earlier in the week what I had going on this weekend I would have mentioned it. I don’t think it crossed my mind since maybe Thursday. I usually keep a running list of tasks, errands, to-dos, groceries we are out of etc. in my head. Kiddo’s event was in my calendar, I just didn’t see or ignored the reminder (which seems to be a thing these days). I’ve been ok remembering re-occurring meetings and events, it’s the one-offs I am struggling with.
Another example – I’ve always been great at two-birds-one-stone errand running, where, for example I’d be out doing errand A and notice that I was near a branch of my bank and although I was going to go to the bank the next day, realize I could do both today. These days, I complete errand A, and then the next day realize that I’ve got to go to the bank and that I missed an opportunity to do it the day before.
Another example – my work as a mid level manager involves a lot of mid-size and small size projects and tasks. I keep rough notes of simple tasks that crop up while I’m in the middle of something else, on sticky notes. I would have maybe 4-5 a day, writing them down as they come up with the intention of completing them that day or the next. These days, I’m sometimes unable to understand the notes if I’ve only written down a word or two. If I wrote ‘call Jim back’, in the past I would know which Jim and would remember what I was calling him about. These days, I sometimes blank and can’t recall why I’d written that note.
All of these instances are adding up, and are freaking me out. If this gets any worse, I’m in trouble. I lead a moderately hectic family life in the city, but there haven’t been any changes or any more stress than usual. Both sides of my family have a history of Alzheimer’s. I’m a bit young for that, so my worst fear right now is that I might have a brain tumor (outlandish, I know). I am going to schedule an appointment with my doctor to begin exploring this. In the meantime, understanding that you are not my doctor, any idea what this could be? Any suggestions for improving my level of organization to cope if this persists or gets worse? Any merit to buying some kind of life/health insurance prior to getting a diagnosis? Thanks
Some examples of what I am experiencing: I’m forgetting about ad hoc meetings or appointments. Though I use my iphone calendar extensively, I have always been good at keeping my schedule in my head, at least the current day plus a couple of days out. Last Thursday I reviewed my work schedule first thing at 8am, then forgot to go to the 9am ad hoc meeting until a colleague asked me if I was attending. I also completely forgot about a dentist appointment that was also in my calendar, a few weeks back. Just this morning, I was supposed to drive kiddo to an event, and totally forgot about it. If you had asked me earlier in the week what I had going on this weekend I would have mentioned it. I don’t think it crossed my mind since maybe Thursday. I usually keep a running list of tasks, errands, to-dos, groceries we are out of etc. in my head. Kiddo’s event was in my calendar, I just didn’t see or ignored the reminder (which seems to be a thing these days). I’ve been ok remembering re-occurring meetings and events, it’s the one-offs I am struggling with.
Another example – I’ve always been great at two-birds-one-stone errand running, where, for example I’d be out doing errand A and notice that I was near a branch of my bank and although I was going to go to the bank the next day, realize I could do both today. These days, I complete errand A, and then the next day realize that I’ve got to go to the bank and that I missed an opportunity to do it the day before.
Another example – my work as a mid level manager involves a lot of mid-size and small size projects and tasks. I keep rough notes of simple tasks that crop up while I’m in the middle of something else, on sticky notes. I would have maybe 4-5 a day, writing them down as they come up with the intention of completing them that day or the next. These days, I’m sometimes unable to understand the notes if I’ve only written down a word or two. If I wrote ‘call Jim back’, in the past I would know which Jim and would remember what I was calling him about. These days, I sometimes blank and can’t recall why I’d written that note.
All of these instances are adding up, and are freaking me out. If this gets any worse, I’m in trouble. I lead a moderately hectic family life in the city, but there haven’t been any changes or any more stress than usual. Both sides of my family have a history of Alzheimer’s. I’m a bit young for that, so my worst fear right now is that I might have a brain tumor (outlandish, I know). I am going to schedule an appointment with my doctor to begin exploring this. In the meantime, understanding that you are not my doctor, any idea what this could be? Any suggestions for improving my level of organization to cope if this persists or gets worse? Any merit to buying some kind of life/health insurance prior to getting a diagnosis? Thanks
How's your sleep? I had similar issues when I wasn't sleeping well for weeks on end.
posted by mattholomew at 8:27 AM on April 23, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by mattholomew at 8:27 AM on April 23, 2017 [4 favorites]
Ask your doctor to check your thyroid, iron, & B12 levels.
posted by belladonna at 8:42 AM on April 23, 2017 [5 favorites]
posted by belladonna at 8:42 AM on April 23, 2017 [5 favorites]
Yeah, low-level shit starts falling apart around 40, and it's much more likely to be a relatively minor medical issue than a tumor or dementia. Go get a physical with bloodwork, bring your doctor a list of symptoms.
In the meantime, if you're not being mindful of your hydration and diet and sleep and daily sunlight exposure and exercise, try to at least improve anywhere you're lacking between now and the appointment and see if that changes anything. It wouldn't hurt to log all that just so you can show the doctor and look for any glaring issues, like a lot of caffeine or much crappier sleep than you're realizing. I think MyFitnessPal lets you log food plus additional variables, that might be the way to go rather than paper logging.
Get an eye exam as well, if you haven't in the past year. I just got a new prescription after waiting entirely too long, and I realize now that I can actually see again that I was burning a lot of resources just trying to exist in a slightly fuzzy world. It didn't occur to me why driving, for example, was suddenly so exhausting. Plus, eye health can be an indicator of a number of problems including diabetes, so go get puffed in the eyes and get the photographs taken, just to be safe.
Definitely also step up your notetaking too, though, because there is a cognitive decline and it sucks. And it may be now that taking better notes pins things more firmly in your memory. You may end up finding out that a) getting old sucks b) but it sucks significantly less when your thyroid/vitamin D/sleep-oxygen/heart is corrected to function appropriately.
posted by Lyn Never at 8:43 AM on April 23, 2017 [2 favorites]
In the meantime, if you're not being mindful of your hydration and diet and sleep and daily sunlight exposure and exercise, try to at least improve anywhere you're lacking between now and the appointment and see if that changes anything. It wouldn't hurt to log all that just so you can show the doctor and look for any glaring issues, like a lot of caffeine or much crappier sleep than you're realizing. I think MyFitnessPal lets you log food plus additional variables, that might be the way to go rather than paper logging.
Get an eye exam as well, if you haven't in the past year. I just got a new prescription after waiting entirely too long, and I realize now that I can actually see again that I was burning a lot of resources just trying to exist in a slightly fuzzy world. It didn't occur to me why driving, for example, was suddenly so exhausting. Plus, eye health can be an indicator of a number of problems including diabetes, so go get puffed in the eyes and get the photographs taken, just to be safe.
Definitely also step up your notetaking too, though, because there is a cognitive decline and it sucks. And it may be now that taking better notes pins things more firmly in your memory. You may end up finding out that a) getting old sucks b) but it sucks significantly less when your thyroid/vitamin D/sleep-oxygen/heart is corrected to function appropriately.
posted by Lyn Never at 8:43 AM on April 23, 2017 [2 favorites]
Also, stress can make us forgetful. The only one of your instances that would worry me at all is not remembering why you wrote a note (like "call Jim") but when under stress (emotional distress or grief, momentary multi-tasking stress, your "moderately hectic" life, etc), it's easy to do something like this with only 1% of your attention on it, so later it's not memorable.
posted by mmw at 8:50 AM on April 23, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by mmw at 8:50 AM on April 23, 2017 [3 favorites]
Inadequate or poor quality sleep, stress, anemia, depression, alcohol use, and many other issues can impact your memory. I know you say you aren't more stressed out than usual, but sometimes it's hard to see the forest for the trees. It's good that you're seeing a doctor.
It sounds like you don't have any insurance at all right now? Personally I'd at least look at what's available in your market, just for your own peace of mind.
As far as organization: Start thinking in terms of what future-you needs to follow through. I have ADD. If it doesn't go into my calendar with a 15-minute reminder (for work) or two reminders for an hour out and two hours out (for everything else), I'm screwed. I've learned to add more detail than I think I need - addresses, not just the name of the person I'm meeting but why I'm meeting them, etc. If I have an early work meeting, it goes on both my work and personal calendars. Things work best when I input reminders as if future me is a separate person who has no idea what "Revise DSF report" means or where it is unless I spell it out.
I hope you get some helpful information here. Good luck to you.
posted by bunderful at 8:56 AM on April 23, 2017 [2 favorites]
It sounds like you don't have any insurance at all right now? Personally I'd at least look at what's available in your market, just for your own peace of mind.
As far as organization: Start thinking in terms of what future-you needs to follow through. I have ADD. If it doesn't go into my calendar with a 15-minute reminder (for work) or two reminders for an hour out and two hours out (for everything else), I'm screwed. I've learned to add more detail than I think I need - addresses, not just the name of the person I'm meeting but why I'm meeting them, etc. If I have an early work meeting, it goes on both my work and personal calendars. Things work best when I input reminders as if future me is a separate person who has no idea what "Revise DSF report" means or where it is unless I spell it out.
I hope you get some helpful information here. Good luck to you.
posted by bunderful at 8:56 AM on April 23, 2017 [2 favorites]
One thing I do is to review my week on Sunday and try to etch into my mind anything exceptional (like a dentist appointment). On particularly busy weeks/days, I'll do a next day review.
I also spend time on Sunday telling my (elementary aged) child what's up that week. Then every two or three days, I give him a reminder about what's coming up in the next few days, highlighting anything exceptional.
This is also part of my larger goal of my kid being responsible for his own things and schedule.
I also have been trying to keep my to do list out of my calendar unless specifically tied to a time. For example, at 10am today the nail salon opens and I am going to call to try to get a late afternoon appointment. But non-scheduled stuff should live elsewhere to declutter the calendar.
Another thing you might want to look into is bullet journaling. Don't be overwhelmed by the fancy setups people do. Basically it is a different way to organize one's schedule and to do list on paper with pen that seems to work for a lot of people.
posted by k8t at 9:10 AM on April 23, 2017
I also spend time on Sunday telling my (elementary aged) child what's up that week. Then every two or three days, I give him a reminder about what's coming up in the next few days, highlighting anything exceptional.
This is also part of my larger goal of my kid being responsible for his own things and schedule.
I also have been trying to keep my to do list out of my calendar unless specifically tied to a time. For example, at 10am today the nail salon opens and I am going to call to try to get a late afternoon appointment. But non-scheduled stuff should live elsewhere to declutter the calendar.
Another thing you might want to look into is bullet journaling. Don't be overwhelmed by the fancy setups people do. Basically it is a different way to organize one's schedule and to do list on paper with pen that seems to work for a lot of people.
posted by k8t at 9:10 AM on April 23, 2017
I can't be the only one reading this and thinking, "Jeez, what's the big deal, this kind of thing happens to me all the time. It's not a brain tumor, it's being a normal human being with a busy life." I'm older than you and I have noticed an increase in this kind of forgetfulness as I've gotten older, but while I was getting older I also had a couple of kids and they got older and all our lives got more complicated, so it's impossible to say how much of the forgetting is because I have so much more to keep track of these days and how much (if any) is because my brain isn't as sharp as it used to be.
You say nothing has changed in your life, but when you have kids things are always changing. Is life with your kid(s) different in any way this year than it was last year? Do you have more or different activities to keep track of, more homework to help with, more kid social problems to think about?
You say there seems to have been a sudden change in the last few months, but it is possible that one or two major instances of forgetfulness close together happened to catch your attention in the last few months, and suddenly you were worried and noticing that kind of thing way more than you ever did in the past? Have you really never forgotten anything like this over the past few years?
Also, you say you haven't been more stressed than usual, but based on the fact that you went straight to "brain tumor," I'm guessing your usual might be on the high side. Coming up with ways to lower stress might help with life in general and forgetfulness in particular.
posted by Redstart at 9:30 AM on April 23, 2017
You say nothing has changed in your life, but when you have kids things are always changing. Is life with your kid(s) different in any way this year than it was last year? Do you have more or different activities to keep track of, more homework to help with, more kid social problems to think about?
You say there seems to have been a sudden change in the last few months, but it is possible that one or two major instances of forgetfulness close together happened to catch your attention in the last few months, and suddenly you were worried and noticing that kind of thing way more than you ever did in the past? Have you really never forgotten anything like this over the past few years?
Also, you say you haven't been more stressed than usual, but based on the fact that you went straight to "brain tumor," I'm guessing your usual might be on the high side. Coming up with ways to lower stress might help with life in general and forgetfulness in particular.
posted by Redstart at 9:30 AM on April 23, 2017
Response by poster: Thanks for the insights folks. For clarity - my sleep is fine. I have health insurance, I don't think I've got any short term/long term disability insurance with my work (which was what I was pondering getting). The change from being able to remember just about everything all of the time to frequent lapses unlike anything I've experienced before has been really noticeable. I'm not saying I never forgot anything before, I'm saying I'm forgetting stuff left right and center now. Remembering in general seems much more taxing than it ever has.
posted by walkinginsunshine at 9:44 AM on April 23, 2017
posted by walkinginsunshine at 9:44 AM on April 23, 2017
Hi there. I didn't notice you mentioning whether you are male or female, but if you happen to be female and might be perimenopausal, brain fogginess and memory lapses are fairly common features of this stage of life. Ask me how I know. Strategies I've employed to mitigate similar problems in my own moderately hectic life: an office whiteboard with enough room on it to write myself more detailed reminders; using my Outlook calendar in a more intentional way (i.e. flags, reminders for recurring events), and setting two reminders on my phone for any calendar event I schedule.
posted by little mouth at 9:49 AM on April 23, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by little mouth at 9:49 AM on April 23, 2017 [1 favorite]
I went through this ten years ago when I began a very demanding high stress job. I was freaking out because I was scared to go to the doctor and get a diagnosis that would get me launched from my job altogether. I am very bad at recognizing stress in my life and the circumstances of the new position were such that it took almost a year for me to get put to the test, it felt like the first day of work lasted all year. In my case this was coupled with menopause and placed on top of classic disorganized ADD. I am far better now even though a family history of dementia makes me second guess every incident of forgetfulness. I feel that whatever the problem is you can't go wrong by making sure you address stress as well.
posted by InkaLomax at 11:25 AM on April 23, 2017
posted by InkaLomax at 11:25 AM on April 23, 2017
Nthing the 'there are a bunch of non-crisis medical things this can be'. Thyroid. Various vitamin deficiencies (if you haven't had D tested, that's a good one to ask about, but B and iron do this to some people, etc.) Also stress.
I had really exceptionally good executive function and memory before having thyroid stuff come up, and between when it started to be an obvious issue and when it got diagnosed, I went from about 95 to 10 in terms of being able to manage stuff. I'm now back to about 75 on a 100 point scale, and make up the 20 points or so with a todo list routine that works for me. (but where I've got to be a lot more rigorous about using it than I was in my 20s or early 30s.)
I'm still particularly likely to miss stuff first thing in the morning because I often don't check the list until I get to work (the day I got to work and realised I should have gone to a blood work appointment was.. well, yes.) so I fix that by putting a thing on my to-do list for the day before that reminds me I'm doing the thing next day, and don't check it off until I've done something to remind myself for the next morning (phone reminder, post-it on the door, whatever.)
posted by modernhypatia at 12:25 PM on April 23, 2017 [1 favorite]
I had really exceptionally good executive function and memory before having thyroid stuff come up, and between when it started to be an obvious issue and when it got diagnosed, I went from about 95 to 10 in terms of being able to manage stuff. I'm now back to about 75 on a 100 point scale, and make up the 20 points or so with a todo list routine that works for me. (but where I've got to be a lot more rigorous about using it than I was in my 20s or early 30s.)
I'm still particularly likely to miss stuff first thing in the morning because I often don't check the list until I get to work (the day I got to work and realised I should have gone to a blood work appointment was.. well, yes.) so I fix that by putting a thing on my to-do list for the day before that reminds me I'm doing the thing next day, and don't check it off until I've done something to remind myself for the next morning (phone reminder, post-it on the door, whatever.)
posted by modernhypatia at 12:25 PM on April 23, 2017 [1 favorite]
Nthing stress or anxiety. I also seem to do better if I'm meditating.
Go talk to your doctor and get a workup as others have mentioned. Just go ask.
posted by getawaysticks at 5:17 PM on April 23, 2017
Go talk to your doctor and get a workup as others have mentioned. Just go ask.
posted by getawaysticks at 5:17 PM on April 23, 2017
This could be caused by
- thyroid issues;
- Iron deficiency anemia;
- Vitamin B12 deficiency anemia;
- sleep apnoea. (Do you snore? Do you wake up with morning headache? Do you feel sleepy around 2-3pm?)
posted by Sockpuppets 'R' Us at 8:20 PM on April 23, 2017
- thyroid issues;
- Iron deficiency anemia;
- Vitamin B12 deficiency anemia;
- sleep apnoea. (Do you snore? Do you wake up with morning headache? Do you feel sleepy around 2-3pm?)
posted by Sockpuppets 'R' Us at 8:20 PM on April 23, 2017
I am not your doctor, but by way of reassurance, I don't think this is a brain tumor. However, you have a kid, therefore you SHOULD get life insurance. Consider long term care insurance. Then, do go and get yourself checked out by your own doctor (I advocate for the approach of describing your symptoms and the impact they are having on your life, rather than presenting yourself as having come for specific tests A, B, and C).
posted by treehorn+bunny at 12:30 AM on April 24, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by treehorn+bunny at 12:30 AM on April 24, 2017 [2 favorites]
It could be any number of things others have mentioned. I started taking notes when that happened to me.
The year I turned 35 my birthday was mid week. That Monday everything was normal. By that Friday I was wearing orthotics and glasses, I kid not.
posted by jtexman1 at 12:19 PM on April 24, 2017
The year I turned 35 my birthday was mid week. That Monday everything was normal. By that Friday I was wearing orthotics and glasses, I kid not.
posted by jtexman1 at 12:19 PM on April 24, 2017
When I was younger I never had to write ANYTHING down. I didn't have to record checks I wrote or hours I worked or appointments and the like. If I wanted to recall something I would just wander back in time inside my head. Sometime in my 30's this superpower vanished and since then it has been all down hill. I say this not to poo poo your freak out, (god knows I sympathize,) but to let you know that you are not alone and sometimes there isn't any identifiable cause except age.
posted by Pembquist at 12:28 PM on April 24, 2017
posted by Pembquist at 12:28 PM on April 24, 2017
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by tully_monster at 8:25 AM on April 23, 2017 [5 favorites]