But, But, I Don't Wanna Work In Underland Full Time
March 24, 2016 7:22 PM Subscribe
I have worked for many years in a position that's located in the basement of a converted 1930's department store. I like my job and I am good at it, but I have always hated working in a cube farm with zero windows and zero cell service. To compensate for the drabness of the work environment, I have been able to telework two days per week, leaving me chained in a drab dungeon only three days per week.
This arrangement has worked well for me, especially in winter when I go to work in the dark and come home in the dark. Once work gets going, I don't get a lot of opportunities for breaks. I usually eat at my desk at home or Underland. I keep a full spectrum lamp in my cube to chase away the greys, and between the lamp and the days working from home, I have tolerated Underland. Recently, The Lady of the Green Kirtle has offered me a promotion with more responsibility and more money. Enough money that I can't say no. The catch is that I will have to go to Underland five days a week. On the upside, I will have an actual office (with a door!), which I can decorate as I wish. Help me make working in Underland 40+ hours per week as cozy and un-Underlandish as possible. Do I need more full-spectrum lamps? Large tacky pictures of beach scenes on the walls? Cozy blankey on my chair? The money is too good to turn down, plus I will still be in charge of the things I am good at, with some fancy travel thrown in every six months. Decorative advice, work perks to stuff in my desk, any and all recommendations accepted. Thanks MeFi!
P.S. I can't install anything on the computer at work, change the light bulbs or furniture, paint the walls, or stream anything.
This arrangement has worked well for me, especially in winter when I go to work in the dark and come home in the dark. Once work gets going, I don't get a lot of opportunities for breaks. I usually eat at my desk at home or Underland. I keep a full spectrum lamp in my cube to chase away the greys, and between the lamp and the days working from home, I have tolerated Underland. Recently, The Lady of the Green Kirtle has offered me a promotion with more responsibility and more money. Enough money that I can't say no. The catch is that I will have to go to Underland five days a week. On the upside, I will have an actual office (with a door!), which I can decorate as I wish. Help me make working in Underland 40+ hours per week as cozy and un-Underlandish as possible. Do I need more full-spectrum lamps? Large tacky pictures of beach scenes on the walls? Cozy blankey on my chair? The money is too good to turn down, plus I will still be in charge of the things I am good at, with some fancy travel thrown in every six months. Decorative advice, work perks to stuff in my desk, any and all recommendations accepted. Thanks MeFi!
P.S. I can't install anything on the computer at work, change the light bulbs or furniture, paint the walls, or stream anything.
Best answer: Fake windows. They key to survival is fake windows.
posted by DarlingBri at 8:27 PM on March 24, 2016 [11 favorites]
posted by DarlingBri at 8:27 PM on March 24, 2016 [11 favorites]
Like, is wallpaper OK? Like giant beach scene wallpaper? You might be able to tack or tape it up I suppose.
posted by GuyZero at 8:38 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by GuyZero at 8:38 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: I can't do wallpaper - but I am looking at DarlingBri's suggestion on fake windows. Keep 'em coming! Imma spend my first paycheck on ottomans and fake windows!
posted by Gyre,Gimble,Wabe, Esq. at 8:53 PM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by Gyre,Gimble,Wabe, Esq. at 8:53 PM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]
How's the lighting in there now? If it's overhead fluorescents you'll want to supplement the lighting. Actually, you might want to supplement any overhead lighting, with lights that come at different angles, like this.
posted by fingersandtoes at 9:02 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by fingersandtoes at 9:02 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
What about some greenery? I don't know enough about plants to name ones that can survive on absolutely no sunlight, but maybe someone else can steer you in the right direction.
Also, is it possible to just step outside a few times a day? I've worked in an office that wasn't as, er, depressing as you mention, but it was windowless and all fluorescent lights, wires, and computer screens. Stepping outside really helped break up the monotony of office-ness.
This probably won't help much but I'll throw it out there - one of those tropical island posters or something in that vein? That might help spruce up the office (perhaps).
posted by atinna at 9:12 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
Also, is it possible to just step outside a few times a day? I've worked in an office that wasn't as, er, depressing as you mention, but it was windowless and all fluorescent lights, wires, and computer screens. Stepping outside really helped break up the monotony of office-ness.
This probably won't help much but I'll throw it out there - one of those tropical island posters or something in that vein? That might help spruce up the office (perhaps).
posted by atinna at 9:12 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
Best answer: I'm fond of the new electric modern fireplaces for offices, the more expensive ones have fantasticly realistic flames (burn a candle that smells like campfire at the same time for the full effect). In your case I would also set up a monitor or tv that has an outdoorsy, live action nature scene with varying light patterns but have a window frame with sparingly-made stained glass or light frosting in front so it is less of a tv and more of a hint of outdoors. Throw in a rug, a wingback chair, along with the afore-mentioned ottoman and no flourescent lighting and yu have a right cosy office.
Also, get out more, especially at lunch, if only for 15 mins. You need to allow your eyes and brain to have long vistas to look at.
posted by saucysault at 9:17 PM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]
Also, get out more, especially at lunch, if only for 15 mins. You need to allow your eyes and brain to have long vistas to look at.
posted by saucysault at 9:17 PM on March 24, 2016 [3 favorites]
Can you put in a picocell to get some cellular coverage?
posted by kickingtheground at 9:24 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by kickingtheground at 9:24 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
Best answer: well, the main thing is you got to remember the lamp is the real thing, the sun is just a children's story, the Overworld is only a dream you had once. that is to console yourself if you really can't take lunch breaks to go outside, but if I were you I would, every day, no exceptions. The beauty of your own office is if you close the door when you leave who's to know you're not still in there, right? You are just working so hard you don't hear anybody knocking.
You might also look into giant wallpaper murals of forest scenes. These aren't the greatest examples but you see the idea:
http://pixersize.com/wallmurals/the-way-by-the-forest-beautiful-wallpaper-52778280?default=1&disable_price=1&feeditemid=&adposition=1o7&gclid=CI3O4saB28sCFRJZhgod9lsPLQ
http://us.photowall.com/photo-wallpaper/aspen-forest?gclid=CKWhqoWC28sCFRNZhgodfMQGuA
posted by queenofbithynia at 9:37 PM on March 24, 2016 [5 favorites]
You might also look into giant wallpaper murals of forest scenes. These aren't the greatest examples but you see the idea:
http://pixersize.com/wallmurals/the-way-by-the-forest-beautiful-wallpaper-52778280?default=1&disable_price=1&feeditemid=&adposition=1o7&gclid=CI3O4saB28sCFRJZhgod9lsPLQ
http://us.photowall.com/photo-wallpaper/aspen-forest?gclid=CKWhqoWC28sCFRNZhgodfMQGuA
posted by queenofbithynia at 9:37 PM on March 24, 2016 [5 favorites]
Best answer: Removable wallpaper? Somewhere (SwissMiss?) I read a profile of a Swiss? Company that will take photos and print them into giant posters or wallpaper and it was pretty affordable!
IKEA plants hold up well and don't get any light in the store - having full spectrum lamps may help them too.
Brightly coloured area rug - esp a shag under your desk so you can slip your shoes off and wiggle toes a bit.
The thing that bothers me about offices is the sensory deprivation. The more color, sound (stream nature noise, cafe noise, etc), scent*, etc I add the better it is. A sit-stand set up, a Swiss ball to sit on, all good too.
*we aren't allowed candles or anything, so I have really nicely scented lotion and smokey incense like solid perfume.
posted by jrobin276 at 9:45 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
IKEA plants hold up well and don't get any light in the store - having full spectrum lamps may help them too.
Brightly coloured area rug - esp a shag under your desk so you can slip your shoes off and wiggle toes a bit.
The thing that bothers me about offices is the sensory deprivation. The more color, sound (stream nature noise, cafe noise, etc), scent*, etc I add the better it is. A sit-stand set up, a Swiss ball to sit on, all good too.
*we aren't allowed candles or anything, so I have really nicely scented lotion and smokey incense like solid perfume.
posted by jrobin276 at 9:45 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
Plan adventures and more away trips. Always have something to look forward to and plan.
posted by amanda at 9:51 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by amanda at 9:51 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
A plant would be great - maybe look into the lighting they have to grow plants (errr... weed?) indoors, so you can keep it alive? Or just recognize that you'll need to replace your pot of succulents or whatever every couple of months. Fresh cut flowers could also work if you're willing to replace them weekly.
A fish, if you can have one, would add some life to the Underworld. Betta fish are relatively low maintenance, but I have no idea if they can survive the weekend without you (or the lack of sunlight).
Wall hangings to add texture to your personal cave. Or a mobile.
posted by Jaclyn at 10:20 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
A fish, if you can have one, would add some life to the Underworld. Betta fish are relatively low maintenance, but I have no idea if they can survive the weekend without you (or the lack of sunlight).
Wall hangings to add texture to your personal cave. Or a mobile.
posted by Jaclyn at 10:20 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]
We turned off the overheads in the cave and bought four nice ikea lamps and a rug for our becaved trio of cubes. And put up fake windows.
posted by tilde at 2:54 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by tilde at 2:54 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
You can't stream anything, but could you load an iPod with any kind of music, ambient sound, birdsong, whatever suits your mood for the day, and have that playing softly in the background? To add to the atmosphere.
posted by dywypi at 3:32 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by dywypi at 3:32 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
Best answer: If this promotion comes with any smidgen of power, schedule your meetings in the Overland or make walking meetings or meetings in a nearby coffeeshop a regular thing. I would also try my darnedest to take my lunch or at least one 15 minute break a day in the daylight. People take smoke breaks right? You can take a fresh air and sunlight break.
posted by purple_bird at 8:58 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by purple_bird at 8:58 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
Best answer: Congrats! Here's a few ideas... Mark the end of a task with a ten minute outdoor break, just like the smokers do, and use the time to plan your next activity: it's work! When you have to meet with people, suggest stepping outside or even going for a walk. If possible, avoid using the overhead florescent lights at all and bring in your own, including a torchiere (maybe with a halogen bulb?) for uplighting. If there's room for an easy chair or couch, get in the habit of switching seats for non desk-dependent work. Start appropriating shared upstairs space for your department when possible, e.g., reserve the better, not just the closest, conference rooms. Good luck!
posted by carmicha at 9:14 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by carmicha at 9:14 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
Best answer: A good watchword to think about is the Scandinavian design term "hygge", or cozy, a concept they use to make spaces warm and inviting during long, dark winters. One thing I've incorporated in my basement dwelling is this Muji aroma diffuser with a dimmable light. It has been a beautiful addition to my often-dark space, creating a cozy, peaceful atmosphere that soothes my light-deprived psyche. The video I linked to is pure relaxation porn, but can give you a sense of its potential placement and use.
posted by Queen of Spreadable Fats at 10:48 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Queen of Spreadable Fats at 10:48 AM on March 25, 2016 [1 favorite]
Plants. If you have enough light to keep understory plants growing, it will be good for you.
Also, making the Underworld slightly weird - not likely to be a problem - and working so hard while there that (a) you're slightly unconscious of your real existence (b) you have time for lunch or at least leaving at five (c) improve chances of being promoted to daylight. But even so, regular distant focus is physically important. Nerf target shooting down a long corridor?...
Does your company know that you want more light?
posted by clew at 12:18 PM on March 25, 2016
Also, making the Underworld slightly weird - not likely to be a problem - and working so hard while there that (a) you're slightly unconscious of your real existence (b) you have time for lunch or at least leaving at five (c) improve chances of being promoted to daylight. But even so, regular distant focus is physically important. Nerf target shooting down a long corridor?...
Does your company know that you want more light?
posted by clew at 12:18 PM on March 25, 2016
Response by poster: Thanks so much for all the lovely suggestions! I will work harder at getting up and walking away from the desk for a few minutes, and will look for cheery rugs. I also love the "Fragrant Light" - who knew that was a thing!
I may come crawling back for more suggestions as the sun wanes in October/November, but I think these are all a great start!
posted by Gyre,Gimble,Wabe, Esq. at 4:28 PM on March 25, 2016
I may come crawling back for more suggestions as the sun wanes in October/November, but I think these are all a great start!
posted by Gyre,Gimble,Wabe, Esq. at 4:28 PM on March 25, 2016
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by xingcat at 7:48 PM on March 24, 2016 [1 favorite]