How do I do improve the world?
December 26, 2015 6:06 AM   Subscribe

I'm stricken by overwhelming concern about the world (environment, hunger, refugees, corrupt corporations) coupled with guilt that I'm not doing anything to improve things. What can I do with the tools available to me?

I'm mostly a mom right now (kids are 4 and 6) and my partner works more than full time in a high stress field. While I'm very aware of my privileged position as a "kept woman", my identity is suffering. I am slowly coming around to the fact that my working life is not going to return to its former glory (I was/am a performer, but haven't worked in years). What can I do or go back to school part time for that will hopefully have a little to do with my i interests and credentials and will also contribute to making the world better? I have a BFA, 15 years experience on film sets, decent behind the camera knowledge when it comes to making movies as a producer. I've run a functional fitness gym and currently train clients one on one in my garage for energy exchange/barter. I'm also interested in food security, special diets for health conditions, and delicious cooking (mostly the intersection of those three ideas). I started a holistic nutrition distance education course but was enraged by the baldfaced lies and anti-science that riddled the textbook. As I said I'm a mom of two young kids and partner is basically unavailable 90% of the time so I feel a bit panicked about ever getting to do anything that matters beyond keeping these creatures alive. Help me figure out a path to explore! I live in Toronto and have access to lots of universities.
posted by lizifer to Education (23 answers total) 26 users marked this as a favorite
 
Money. Money, money, money. Giving your time and giving yourself is a wonderful thing, but you have your life and you're doing what you need to do, so if you can give money to well-researched causes, that is always, always needed. It's interesting how many people are not swayed by the calls for monetary resources because it doesn't feel as good as giving of their time or other things (food pantries come to mind, where they'd much rather use money to get bulk bargains on food rather than a can drive or giving a few boxes of food into a bin).
posted by xingcat at 6:48 AM on December 26, 2015 [4 favorites]


First, every mom is doing a lot just by raising kids with awareness. You can't save the whole world, and we need you to save the part where you are the dominant influence.

But let me tell you a story. For a while, I was on the board of a charitable foundation that had a certain amount of money to give to organizations that we found deserving. Things like $15,000 for a half-way house to refurbish room. We received requests/proposals that were everything from one barely literate page letters to half-inch thick, professional quality documents.

On one occasion, we got a videotape on behalf of the Boys & Girls Club. It was produced and narrated by Ron Howard. It blew us away, a real testament to the persuasive power of film.

So I say, use your skills. If you lived near me, I would suggest you talk to the folks at our local cable company. They have a channel with local news and programming, and have food demos with local restaurateurs. You could do food demos with the emphasis that is important to you.

It's also possible that you could go directly into schools. Our local middle schools actually teach some minimum cooking skills, and also have after-school programs some with teachers from the community.
posted by SemiSalt at 6:54 AM on December 26, 2015 [11 favorites]


Definitely seconding xingcat about the need being money. Organizations that do excellent work are often hamstrung and wasting money due to having to keep the lights on. Grants often are for programs only, opting not to pay for the day-to-day infrastructure needs.

It seems to me right now that you may be in a good position to serve on the board of a local organization whose mission you believe in. Your job as a board member may vary based on the bylaws of the organization, but typically one of the main jobs is to raise money. You may be called on to help write grants in the area of your expertise. You may need to link the executive director with influential friends of yours. You might organize an event with other people.

The point is, you can contribute in a very important way without needing to be made of money. You definitely will be expected to give something to the org if you're on the board, but often it is a monetary goal and you can count other people's donations that you get.
posted by Stewriffic at 7:07 AM on December 26, 2015


Best answer: Can you make documentaries? Or movies for children? For all the issues that you are concerned about - it's always a battle for people's hearts and minds. Finding a way to really educate and influence people on issues is eventually what turns things around
posted by gt2 at 7:13 AM on December 26, 2015 [4 favorites]


I'm also interested in food security, special diets for health conditions, and delicious cooking

I would look into veganism. The animal-agriculture industry has a far bigger impact on climate change than the entire transportation sector combined (see the UN report, "Livestock's Long Shadow"). Since you are interested in film, you can start by viewing some documentaries on the subject (see Cowspiracy, Forks Over Knives, among others). and then perhaps creating your own films (per gt2's excellent suggestion above). To "get your feet wet", you could start by creating a blog that would promote vegan cooking.
posted by alex1965 at 7:31 AM on December 26, 2015 [2 favorites]


How about volunteering with poor children and teaching them how to cook? And not just showing them how to cook, but adapting the menu to show them how to eat both healthfully and economically? Quinoa, for example, isn't going to fly, but how about showing them how you can take a bag of dry beans and turn it into something they can eat?

If you are into growing things at all (and if you aren't, why not get into it?), starting a community garden of some kind where these children can learn how to grow things, and take the process from start to finish, would be even more enriching.
posted by unannihilated at 7:38 AM on December 26, 2015 [2 favorites]


Best answer: Believe it or not, a _lot_ of people ask this question, and there aren't easy answers. There are answers, though. Vague things like "find a need close to you, and fill it", "get training to become an advocate", "do what you are doing now to the best of your ability to benefit not just yourself and your own family, but others too", "become an expert in doing your own work in a low-environmental-footprint way", etc. These aren't the most helpful answers, though -- a good answer should be tailored to the individual's talents and _needs_.

While giving money is helpful, you need a certain amount of human contact and input to sustain yourself and the specific part of you that feels moved to give. Respect that.

However, here's my real suggestion: help _others_ answer this same question. Really research the different ways people can help the world. Match those ways with potential contributors' resources (time, skills, energy, passions). Then find a way to get that information to people near you in space or spirit. Let it take time.

If you get enthusiastic about this idea, please contact me; it's something I've been pondering for a while.
posted by amtho at 7:43 AM on December 26, 2015 [6 favorites]


Best answer: To the folks saying "give money," assume that a person has already given money - and wants to do more than that.
posted by jzb at 7:57 AM on December 26, 2015 [1 favorite]


You have empathy and compassion for strangers. That's great; foster that in your children and teach them that people who seem unlike them (in looks, religion, opinion, circumstance) are still people first, just like them. That itself would be a service to the world.

In addition to that, what do you like? What part of your experience has been fun for you? Let what you love guide you. There are ways to help the world no matter what you do.

Just a note though, that while compassion for the world is great, excessive guilt over things you can't control is not (it's a sign of depression).

You are a whole and worthy person just the way you are, regardless of any current circumstance.
posted by zennie at 8:07 AM on December 26, 2015


I can't help with suggestions for things you can do but as corny as can be but I find this story/quote very helpful n the face of the mental paralysis that comes from wanting to help all the people.

So much so my husband bought me a necklace with a starfish charm on it to remind me. I can't help everyone but I can help the next person that comes my way & needs help, & the next one.
posted by wwax at 8:22 AM on December 26, 2015 [1 favorite]


Best answer: A lot of schools, especially low income schools, have nutrition programs now that include cooking, healthy eating, understanding where food comes from (i.e. farms), etc. Theses are relatively volunteer intensive because you need several adults to supervise and assist 8-year-olds with knives and fire. Some programs help kids learn about, and build, backyard gardens or community gardens or potted herb garden. Some bring in important local chefs to talk to kids about food and cooking and to make them delicious things. Something like that may already exist in nearby schools and need your help; alternatively, you could research programs of that sort and see about bringing it to schools near you.

I had a recent ask about a similar overwhelming boredom, lack of direction, and total life-panic as I realize my kids were old enough not to need my CONSTANT attention but my family situation (also spouse with intense job) doesn't really allow for me to take a traditional 9-to-5, which is the only kind of work I really know. So I feel you and you are not alone! I've turned my interests in local history, urban planning, and community revitalization into a project documenting the history and current status of a historic working class neighborhood in my city. I just like it there, and nobody else had done it. I'm not "qualified" per se but I'm learning as I go and feeling more confident in my abilities as I go. Which isn't to say go document a neighborhood, but go take on an interesting project and trust you'll gain the skills you need as you go.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:23 AM on December 26, 2015 [3 favorites]


Best answer: Ooo, yes, charities are in desperate need of skilled volunteers to tell their stories! Even a one minute thank you video where a donor talks about why they gave to that particular organization can have a huge impact. Find an organization doing good work in your community and see if they have any projects you can work on.

I still read blogs and I would definitely read well written posts about food security, raising kids, etc. Not sure if that would be worthwhile for you, but it's something easy to do for a bit while you figure out your next steps. Even just a one sentence "here's something I did to help the world today" or "here's something I thought about" or "here's something I taught my kids" would be very affirming.
posted by betsybetsy at 8:27 AM on December 26, 2015 [2 favorites]


I've been thinking for a long time that there is a whole host of first world health and socioeconomic issues that could be fought with decent home economics education at the high school level, so that kids would enter society with the tools to run a household on a given budget; create decent tasting meals out of inexpensive and healthy food; basic needle stitching to mend/alter clothes, etc. (I understand this used to be a thing, but it isn't anymore where I live.) I wonder whether offering to teach such a course (it would probably have to be an after school optional course at least at first?) could be a practical application of your knowledge.
posted by fingersandtoes at 8:44 AM on December 26, 2015


Open an excel file and create a matrix.

In the left-hand column, list your skills and interest. In the top-most row, list the needs and issues that you see in the world around you. Where these points intersect, write in ideas for groups you might work with, projects you might lead, etc. This might involve some research.

Then look at the matrix. You might color-code based on level of need or interest or whatever. Then consider which things are practical for you to take on at this time in your life, and which might make more sense later on. I'm assuming your 4-year old is at home right now, but in another year will likely be in school... perhaps right now you need to take on projects that will allow you to work on them at home, or bring your child with you. Later on you might have more free time during the day, and then you can look at projects/organizations with different demands.

However, remember that you can spend a LOT of time - and I have - spinning your wheels finding the best organization which is addressing the greatest need. I did that, and then I found that they were rather hard to volunteer with. So I give them money, and I volunteer with organizations that need and want my help.

In my town one of the local UU churches is a social justice powerhouse, and getting involved with their programs has made it so much easier to get involved and put my skills to work where they can make a difference. So you might consider looking for local churches or other organizations with strong networks / programming.

Also - a lot of activism I see happening right now is on Facebook. Even people who are mostly staying at home are sharing information about issues that are important to them - they post articles and information about volunteer opportunities and events, and that stuff makes an impact.
posted by bunderful at 9:46 AM on December 26, 2015 [2 favorites]


Best answer: Given your specific issues and talents, start going to meetings of environmental advocacy groups and see what their needs and projects are related to documentary filmmaking. You could be doing a lot of good helping to create educational or journalistic films to raise environmental awareness. Certainly donate, attend events, help organize people - but given your CV, you have skills that could be put to good use.
posted by graymouser at 11:07 AM on December 26, 2015 [2 favorites]


+1 documentaries or other video documentation of the good work that nonprofits do
posted by salvia at 12:14 PM on December 26, 2015


Best answer: I used help run a non-profit, and all of the heavy lifting, staff, board, and volunteer, was done by women like you -- educated, highly motivated, but whose careers had been rerouted by children, marriage, etc. That doesn't answer what issue you should focus on -- you should listen to your heart for that -- but when you find it you should have the confidence that you have the capacity to make a serious contribution. It might be with an existing organization or maybe you will start your own, but the attributes you describe are what will be needed.
posted by Dip Flash at 12:20 PM on December 26, 2015 [2 favorites]


Is there a school in your area that has had to cut its arts program due to budget constraints? If so, could you volunteer to run a class or manage a club for students interested in performing arts?
posted by decathecting at 12:40 PM on December 26, 2015


my identity is suffering. I am slowly coming around to the fact that my working life is not going to return to its former glory (I was/am a performer, but haven't worked in years).

Look into taking classes part-time. Look for either online classes or classes intended for working professionals that, say, meet for three hours once a week instead of one hour three times a week. Consider just taking whatever interests you. This was important in how Steve Jobs ended doing ground breaking work. Or find a certificate program or other relatively short course that you find interesting.

Between being a military wife, having health problems and raising special needs kids, I was a homemaker a long time. I read that taking time off work always undermines your career with the one exception of doing so to pursue an education. I went to school part-time, intermittently while raising kids and supporting my husband's career. It helped me get a better-than-minimum-wage corporate job during my divorce at a company that impressed everyone I talked to in town, even without knowing my job title.

I started a holistic nutrition distance education course but was enraged by the baldfaced lies and anti-science that riddled the textbook

One thing you could do is start a blog/website. Find a free blogging platform you like. Consider starting it in private mode so it is just a personal sandbox. There is a lot of need in the world for basic information about things like health and nutrition. If you are enraged by what this industry does, you can bet other people are equally outraged and still others just have no clue and need some alternatives to the dreck currently our there.

Whatever the subject, if it is your own personal web project, you own all the original content that you produce. You can develop it on whatever schedule works for you. Some women do become popular in some space. This can be a thing that enhances a resume someday or it can potentially be monetized and make you money if you want to put effort into making it profitable -- which is effort on top of developing the content. "Build and it they will pay" models do not work. They may (or may not) show up for the doohickey you built in your free time, but that doohickey won't likely magically make money. But you don't have to decide today if you want it to make money. You can just work on it. Cuz. Identity/whatever.
posted by Michele in California at 2:18 PM on December 26, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm a trustee of my local Awesome Foundation, where we give small cash grants to interesting projects. It's a low-key way to make an impact (we've funded refugee welcome programs, art installation, health initiatives, and so many more) and is also a fantastic way to meet people involved in those projects, and see where you can lend a hand. There's a small cash donation per trustee per month, and the time commitment is a few hours once a month. I've found it a wonderful way to meet people in my new community, and help where possible.

The Toronto chapter looks dormant; maybe they need a hand in getting it running again?
posted by third word on a random page at 5:12 PM on December 26, 2015 [2 favorites]


Best answer: How about volunteering your skills for organizations that need them mostly online and mostly from home? Catchafire is a website that matches your skills and interests with organizations that need a certain task done, such as translating pamphlets, writing a donor letter, user-testing their website, writing up a training plan for their employees, etc. Some require in-person commitments but a lot can be done from the comfort of your home. This helps when non profits need something done but it would cost too much to contract it out to someone, and their full time employees and other volunteers are already too busy.

The application process might seem a little daunting, but I wrote a quick little "bio" of where I was born, where I went to school, and what I am doing now, and that seems to be fine for all the organizations, no one has turned down my help yet.
posted by never.was.and.never.will.be. at 5:46 PM on December 26, 2015 [1 favorite]


Response by poster: These are excellent suggestions! If I may narrow the scope a bit, I'm looking for career-path advice in addition to volunteering advice. My partner does not want to be always working his high-pressure job forever and ever the end.
posted by lizifer at 8:01 AM on December 27, 2015


Your mileage may vary, but I found a couple of counseling sessions really valuable for helping me take all the information I'd been accumulating and ideas and thoughts and pent-up desire to do something and turn it into concrete actions and places to start. It was literally just a few sessions, not a long-term therapy relationship. I had 5 sessions approved by my company's EAP (employee assistance program) but ended up using just 3, and you might well be covered by your spouse's EAP also. Worth looking in to at any rate.

I was getting into a rut of "I could volunteer on a weekend now and again, but how will that solve world hunger?!?!" where nothing was important enough to waste my time on, but in turn I didn't feel like I was doing anything... I really empathize with your frustration here. Just having a counselor to be a sounding board who could help me not chase myself in circles, and who could give me the space to remind myself that helping people was worth while even if it didn't Change The World (tm), was so valuable.
posted by Lady Li at 10:03 AM on December 27, 2015


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