Stopping the email train

November 2, 2015 8:10 AM

Thanks for your response! Sorry about clogging your inbox with gratitude.

No idea if this has been asked before or even how to Google it. I'm on a quixotic quest for admission to grad school and I am sending out a lot of emails. On the off chance that one of them gets answered by a person who is either helpful or encouraging or God forbid both, I dance around the apartment like a crazy person. Hours later, when the hyperactivity subsides, I answer them, a terrifying process that involves many hours and a nonstop Tina Belcher groan. And then they answer me. And it is enough, I have wasted enough of their time, they are busy and important people. Do I then send a super short thank you email, or does that waste even more of their time / inbox space? Yes, I am aware that this sounds fantastically neurotic.

posted by knuspermanatee to Human Relations (14 answers total)

I work for a graduate program and receive many emails for requests for information. I like the final thank you email because it helps me to be sure that I've fully addressed the request and that the prospective student is satisfied. So, I say send it.
posted by Pineapplicious at 8:15 AM on November 2, 2015 [2 favorites]

I used to do this, but now that I'm a graduate student who is constantly getting and sending emails, I only send thank you/simple confirmation emails when I feel they need some confirmation that everything's a go. I don't like getting these emails so I use common sense deciding if it's necessary. It usually isn't.
posted by Aranquis at 8:23 AM on November 2, 2015

I think this depends a little on the email they send to you. If you have an email chaing that's of this form:

question-answer-question-answer

Then I think a (brief) thank you at the end of that chain is appropriate.

If it's more like this:

question-answer-thank you- no thank YOU

Then let it lie. Basically I would not get involved in MULTIPLE thank you back and forth emails, but I think ONE is ok.
posted by rainbowbrite at 8:24 AM on November 2, 2015 [1 favorite]

My feeling is this: if you've asked a simple question, and received a simple answer, then there's not a lot of need to follow up on that and adding to the inbox is just annoying. If you've asked a more complicated question or received a more complicated answer or gone back and forth a few times working out an issue, then it's helpful to confirm you've gotten what you need and also to thank the person for taking their time to deal with your issue.
posted by jacquilynne at 8:59 AM on November 2, 2015

I don't think a one-line "thanks so much, that was really helpful!" sort of email wastes significant time or email space. It's easy to glance over and archive/delete in a matter of seconds, and it's probably a satisfying pause in a stream of other less fun to deal with emails.
posted by needs more cowbell at 9:03 AM on November 2, 2015 [6 favorites]

I'm a fan of a final, single non-substantive thank-you response. It's polite, and it's surprising perhaps how much many people appreciate that, but it also serves a purpose. It lets the sender know you got their email and have seen it, an itch many of us have as senders. So it prevents that from being a problem.

But then, let it lie. If they respond with a "you're welcome!", do not reply to that.
posted by bonehead at 9:10 AM on November 2, 2015 [3 favorites]

I think it is rarely inappropriate to say thanks when someone is helpful or provides information. Don't do so in a way that requests a reply, or that goes beyond a quick sentence saying thanks.
posted by Dip Flash at 9:13 AM on November 2, 2015

I don't think you ever regret saying thank you. (I am often on the other end of an email chain like this and it actually drives me bonkers if the person doesn't thank me.) Err on the side of politeness!
posted by Countess Sandwich at 9:27 AM on November 2, 2015

I get a lot of email, both personally and professionally. I self-diagnose as being more than usually grumpy with respect to email practices I perceive as wasting my time (examples: non-descriptive subject lines; top-posting; just about any use of "reply all").

When I've spent some time answering a question for someone, I do not expect a "thank you" message, but I certainly don't object should I receive one. I don't have to reply to it, act on it or file it, so the overhead is minimal.

When someone answers a question for me, I'll skip the content-free "thanks" if it was a one-liner, but send it if it's something they obviously put some time and/or thought into.

Second- and higher-order replies ("No, thank you!") are not needed, wanted or appreciated.
posted by sourcequench at 9:29 AM on November 2, 2015

I agree that a brief, one line thank you reply is good. Literally, it can just be something like: "Thank you for all your help with this!" or "Thank you for answering all my questions!" You can even jot down a few variations of this so you don't really have to think about how to phrase it. Even just an email that says "Thank you!" is good.

FWIW, I work in an academic environment, and I end up in a lot of these types of email chains. I'm not particularly bothered by people who don't respond with a final thank you, but I do always appreciate it when someone sends a thank you, since it's polite and more importantly it lets me know they received the email and that they don't need any further follow up.

I would definitely err on the side of sending a single, brief thank you email. As long as it's something that's brief and doesn't require follow up, I don't consider it to be something that clogs up my inbox.
posted by litera scripta manet at 9:34 AM on November 2, 2015 [1 favorite]

At work, I get hundreds of emails a day. Many from people I do not know.

I love a "thank you" email because it closes the loop and lets me know that they no longer need any of my time and they have what they wanted.
posted by French Fry at 9:55 AM on November 2, 2015 [3 favorites]

I ask and answer often for my job. Here is my policy once the task is done:
Emails - Thanks from the asker - No Reply from the answerer
Chat - Thanks from the asker and You're Welcome from the answerer

I don't think horribly of people who have different policies.
posted by soelo at 10:46 AM on November 2, 2015

I almost always send a broef thanks email, and depending on context, will also add something like "No need to reply. I just wanted to say thank you for your time."
posted by Brittanie at 12:39 PM on November 2, 2015

Response by poster: Can't mark a best answer, it was great to hear all perspectives on the issue! Thanks so much (I'll restrain myself to a single expression of gratitude) :)
posted by knuspermanatee at 7:23 AM on November 3, 2015