Old, Cranky, Beloved...Our New Cat is a Troublemaker

October 9, 2015 1:59 PM

How can I help my adopted cat be less aggressive to our other cats?

A few months ago a cat adopted us. She's doing well - all the infections are clear, kidney issues are under control and her litter confusion is fixed. She's still 15 years old, deaf and blind in one eye, but she's as good as she can be health-wise.

The problem is she's is a boiling cauldron of hatred toward our other two indoor cats and to the ferals that live on our back patio. She's mostly sweet to me. She follows me around and sits on my lap. She's very aggressive to all other cats - howling at them and occasionally chasing our two indoor cats and attacking the window to get at the ferals. She gets so stressed that she swats at my feet or nips at my finger. She's clearly not trying to break my skin she's just letting me know that she's stressed. Both of my other indoor cats are younger, much larger, fitter and stronger, but they let her bully them and try to run away. We keep her separated from the boys unless we are home to supervise.

What can I do to help her adjust? I think rehoming her is probably not an option considering her age and ongoing medical costs. I also don't think that releasing her to the local no-kill shelter is an option either, because she'd be miserable around other animals. Plus, I love her.

Things we tried: She has a safe room with her own litter box. We tried limited exposure and feeding on opposite sides of the door to build positive associations. We've exchanged blankets to get the new cat acclimated to each other cats smells. Sooooo much Feliway. She's still super aggressive.

What can we do to make things better between the animals? I don't think it's a good situation for any of them.

Photos
Remiendos - the new adoptee
Dia and Noche - my in house brothers
Two of the four ferals who live on my patio. (Yes, there is a catch, neuter and release in their future.)
Bonus: the pregnant stray who is setting up housekeeping in my yard because she knows I'm a sucker.

posted by 26.2 to Pets & Animals (6 answers total)

I have heard that a tiny drop of vanilla extract rubbed on each cat's head is a great way to make them both smell the same but also weird and that strangely, it can kind of neutralize their mutual dislike.
posted by kate blank at 2:37 PM on October 9, 2015

(I also want to say that I have a 14-year old cat and my boyfriend has two young athletic cats and we moved in together last year and it definitely, definitely can get better -- lots of love and good luck to you, you are clearly a devoted owner with very lucky cats.)
posted by kate blank at 2:38 PM on October 9, 2015

I am dealing with a very similar problem with my foster cat Anabel, though in my case she is a bit younger so I hold out hope of adopting her out. I introduced her to my three cats faster than I should've, and the result is she's in her own space 24/7 and attacks the crap out of my cats if they're even introduced together. My current theory about what I did wrong:

• I introduced the cats too fast, establishing bad feelings and trauma between all of them early on. Even though she's now in her own room and I'm trying the ultra-slow reintroduction, it is even more difficult than it would be otherwise. Lesson: go ultra-slow from the start
• Anabel had some dental and health issues that were causing her pain and making her uncomfortable, so she was even more reactive in the beginning. Lesson: resolve cat's health issues before introducing them to other cats
• I do not have a lot of free time and her "solitary" area was a room I don't often go into to. I'm ashamed to admit many days our only interaction was me putting food in there. Like people, cats don't do well with solitary confinement. Once I moved her and her litterbox and food into my bedroom her temperament improved tremendously. I don't do a lot in there either, but just the increased contact from me changing in there and snuggling with her at night has been enough. Lesson: put the solitary area somewhere where she'll still get interaction with people

She actually gets along much better with the second cat I'm fostering, the one who only met her face-to-face last week. The face-to-face came after she'd been in my room with me for a week, three weeks after her painful dental problems were resolved, and over a month of under-the-door interaction.

Now I'm hoping that I can get her and the other cats used to one another through patience:

• Every meal they get is on either side of the door, all the time.
• Judicious use of catnip toys pushed back and forth under the door crack to encourage interaction.
• Slooowly increasing exposure via double-stacked pet gates with screening across them (so they can't jump over the bottom gate or slip through the bars) or securing the door to open just a crack. If you have the option, you could buy an extremely cheap screen door and install it between Remeindos's room and the rest of the house.
• Pairing each increase in exposure with feedings of extremely stinky wet food on either side of the door.

I have no idea if all this will work, but I'm hoping. Anyway, maybe some of this stuff can help you. At the very least if I were you I would keep them in separate rooms entirely for now, even if you're around. Every time there's another attack it will just reinforce bad feelings.

Also I really like this calming collar over Feliway. For Feliway to be most effective it needs to build up in a room. This means putting it everywhere and never opening windows or doors lest it get sucked out with the draft. The collar stays with cats. It doesn't work on all cats, but when it does it works great.
posted by Anonymous at 3:22 PM on October 9, 2015

I have heard that a tiny drop of vanilla extract rubbed on each cat's head is a great way to .... (snip)

I have heard that a big pat of butter rubbed on each cat's head is a great way to get them to lick each other, which of course is an affectionate act.
posted by TenaciousB at 3:51 PM on October 9, 2015 [1 favorite]

You could also get your vet to prescribe Royal Canin Calm formula food. One of my cats was very anxious and had started to attack me but two weeks of the food and she was transformed. It contains tryptophan: she isn't dozing off in front of football games but she's certainly happier and more predictable. Your new adoptee (cute!) is also having to deal not only with the cats inside but three or more outside - that's a lot. Could you block her view to the outdoors for a while?
posted by firstdrop at 5:55 PM on October 9, 2015 [1 favorite]

Poor girl-- so many years as a solitary hunter, and now she has a human she loves, but the human comes attached to other stinky cats who are young/big enough to be a threat to her. She's really lucky to have found you, by the way, and is a very pretty girl.

I don't know if you have looked into kitty anti-anxiety meds? It may be that she can't take them because of her kidney issues-- but I understand they can be used to treat fear-based aggression issues pretty effectively.
posted by frumiousb at 6:07 PM on October 9, 2015 [1 favorite]