Want to move across country. How do I do it?

July 28, 2015 3:10 PM

I'm itching for change and would like to move to preferably in the next year. I'm looking into San Francisco, Los Angeles, New York City and Portland. I've moved before and to different states/ cities, but this would be the biggest move ever in my life. I need advice on how to find jobs out of state, finding a place to live, and how to get all my junk across country as well. Is it easier to just save up a bunch and move and find a job when I get settled or should I try to get a job and then use that opportunity to move? Any tips or advice would be appreciated.

I have a BFA in Fashion Marketing and Management with a minor in Graphic Design from an amazing art school. I'm currently working as a eCommerce coordinator for a large fashion company. I have a background in eCommerce,Visual Merchandising, retail, freelance Graphic Design, studio photography, retouching photos,and layout design. I'm also a ladypreneur as I run my own eCommerce business with help of an intern.

More about me...
I'm pretty extroverted, social butterfly, energetic, love meeting new people, always trying out the latest workout trend ( zumba, hot yoga,etc), love going to art openings, museums and exhibitions, festivals, a huge foodie,friendly, and all about supporting local businesses. I'm 27, don't have any children, not married and my ex and I have officially cut ties. I work full time in the eCommerce department at a huge fashion lifestyle brand while running my own eCommerce boutique at night. I do many pop ups around the city and have a pretty big following. My business is still pretty new and I make money from it but it's not enough to quit my day job. I'm currently in the process of redoing my portfolio and building my website to have a better upper hand while searching for creative jobs. I've been applying for jobs using addresses of friends who already live in those cities that don't require a portfolio in the meantime.

Some things I'm looking for in the new city....
liberal
active (biking, walkability, doggie parks, parks)
tons to activities to do during day and night, events always happening in the city, festivals, parties, art openings etc. I'm not a homebody and like to go out whenever possible.
foodie town ( food trucks, mom and pop shops, etc) I don't mind where the food comes from, as long as its really delicious. I love international food and will try anything once.
progressive (politically, culturally, socially) I'm a pretty progressive person so I would love to be surrounded by people who are similar and would love to be in a city that feels this way too.

I'm leaning more towards moving to Cali as it seems more fitting my lifestyle in regards to the points above but also I can keep my car, have more space than I would in NYC. I don't know many people who live in California as I do in NYC, so this worries me. I graduated school already so I wouldn't be able to make friends as easily as I did when I first moved to my current city and might be harder since I only know 3 people total that live in Cali. San Francisco being my first choice, open to Oakland as this is the new Brooklyn and less expensive to live in than SF, and LA being my third choice. All pretty cool cities that I don't mind moving for the correct job!

NYC seems to have more going on. I love the hustle and bustle of the city and the feeling of always having somewhere to be and go. I get bored easily and couldn't see myself ever getting bored of NYC. Every time I visit, which has been a couple of times since I was 13, I always have the best time and am terribly sad when I leave. I have many of my close friends that lives there and immediate family, but I would most likely have to sell my car and find an apartment/roommate that allows dogs. I love the subway but I could see myself getting annoyed with riding it everyday to work,to run errands to meet friends, from a late late night of partying and having to deal with the lack of personal space on the train and coming home to an even tinier apartment.

In my job hunt, I'm applying to jobs in all cities and hoping that the universe will choose which city I belong in. What tips do you all have for finding a new job in a city where you don't live yet? How do I pack up my life and literally move across country? My mother says she would help me move, hire movers, help me pack up the truck and go with me to get settled in, so this would take a lot of stress off of my plate but I'm more concerned with finding out how to actually get to the new city. Is it better and even possible to save up a ton of money, and just head out and move when I get enough money, worry about finding a job when I get there or would it be better to find a job first and then move?

posted by ruebeignet to Work & Money (11 answers total)

San Francisco is great, but super expensive. US$1700.00 will barely get you a studio, maybe a room in someone's house, no bs. I know you said the universe will help you choose, but there are places where it's easier to move to than others. Knowing some people in your target city will help. Making friends in SF is not easy, I actually think NY is easier, IMO. Anyway, the first you need to think about before you move anywhere is what you really *need*. Keep your favorite books, donate the rest, and so on. Last time I moved I made a list: Need to keep/Would like to keep/Don't need to keep. Based on experience, I'd suggest for you to find a job first, then move. I hope you'll move to a great place, take care. :)
posted by dragonbaby07 at 4:04 PM on July 28, 2015 [2 favorites]

Job first, move second. Especially since you don't have a single city in mind.
posted by orangejenny at 4:06 PM on July 28, 2015 [6 favorites]

NYC, definitely. If you want to keep your car, look into Jersey City.
posted by sexyrobot at 4:27 PM on July 28, 2015 [1 favorite]

On the California side of things, I can say that the job market in SF is much better than the job market in LA. SF is ludicrously expensive, but Oakland isn't, er, quite as bad. More expensive than LA, for sure, and for the price you'll probably find a smaller place. You can expect to see 30-40 people at some apartment viewings, too. It's that much harder to find a place if you don't have a job lined up, and some places even want you to have been at your job for a while if they're going to accept you (because they're jerks and they can get away with that).

Also, having just completed my own long-distance move, bear in mind that it's hard to look for apartments when you don't live there already; you don't know the neighborhoods very well, and you have to either take a lot of trips there to view apartments, or you have to stay at an AirBnb while you're hunting. That all adds up, so take that into account ahead of time when you're budgeting for stuff.
posted by teponaztli at 4:44 PM on July 28, 2015 [1 favorite]

I've lived in all four cities, and love all of them for different reasons. Are you going to be working remotely/for yourself or looking for a new job? If continuing your current work, what's your budget for rent? Portland is obviously vastly cheaper than NYC, and LA is a little cheaper than SF. In terms of the lifestyle you want, I'd vote for NYC. Interesting things happen in SF, but NYC has many, many more all the time. And much of SF shuts down early at night. I think New York is much more fun for a social person. And way better for fashion, no contest.
posted by three_red_balloons at 5:40 PM on July 28, 2015

It's really pretty risky to move without a job these days. It sounds great on paper to save up 6 months of living expenses and land a gig when you arrive. But then you have a potential 6 month gap in your résumé and no insurance or income in the meantime, which might make it even harder to find a job. Personally I wouldn't risk it.
posted by deathpanels at 5:58 PM on July 28, 2015 [1 favorite]

I've lived in both SF and LA, and if you're choosing between the two for fashion LA would be a no-brainer [FWIW, for my temperament, SF is much more social than LA, but my friends in fashion/design say the opposite. I've never "gotten" NY, so I feel very definitively that people can have "a coast" or "a city" that fits them like a glove, and there is no rubric that we, the internet, can use to tell you which one will be your glove].

I moved to LA from DC with no job, but this was during the economic collapse in 2008 when it seemed that no one had any jobs, so unemployment wasn't a bad starting point. I had about 6 months of hand-to-mouth existence money, and was unemployed for 8 months. The experience was... not good, so, yes, to join the chorus, seek work first and do whatever you can to convince yourself to move only after you've secured work. Even if it's work you intend to leave once you get your feet on the ground in your new city, finding work is the least stressful when you already have a job.

Moving across the country is expensive. I had few belongings, but getting what I did have from DC to LA ran me about $1,000. I found a van line that saved me a few hundred $ by mixing my stuff in with other peoples' stuff, so instead of a solid arrival data I got an arrival date range. Six years later, it cost almost three times that amount to move from LA to SF with considerably more stuff. Moving: it's expensive at any scale.

In retrospect, I was very (very) foolish, but I was much younger and the whole affair had a distinct air of adventure. I was aware of the probable hardships and went anyway, a decision I can't quite say I still understand now that I have a home and a dog and all that.

In any case, save as much as you can before you move. Remember that you'll have to find new everything: new doctor, new dentist, new good neighbor who will tell you if someone's been messing with your apartment door, new cheap food joint, new bus lines, new traffic schedules, new... you k now, it just goes on. Life is generally more expensive when you don't already know all these good people and places and things and that tends to catch people off guard.
posted by late afternoon dreaming hotel at 6:12 PM on July 28, 2015 [3 favorites]

My only solid tip - start getting rid of stuff right the heck now (the less junk to schlep, the better).
posted by Gin and Broadband at 12:05 AM on July 29, 2015 [1 favorite]

Response by poster: Just to clarify @three_red_balloons, I plan to find a full time creative job with another company in the new state while also still running my own business. What resources have you all used in finding a job in a new city? Through old networking contacts, from Alma Mater, job sites, LinkedIn, word of mouth, etc? I'm currently saving up for last minute flights for interviews, and plan on staying with friends when I apartment hunting and for interviews.
posted by ruebeignet at 7:59 AM on July 29, 2015

I have done the cross country move (NYC to San Diego to San Francisco). I fantasized about driving from NY to San Diego but didn't own a car and it would have been extremely expensive, so I flew. I shipped my clothes, books, and small meaningful things I couldn't bear to part with, via FedEx, and gave away most of my furniture/kitchen stuff to friends. I moved back in with family for a period of time, so I was able to save money, find a job in SF and move there. I absolutely never would have moved to the Bay Area without a job. The cost of living here is insanely high across the board - in some ways, it feels more expensive than NYC. Moving was very costly. Rent, security fee, furnishings, stocking an empty kitchen, utilities, renting Uhauls for trips to Ikea. It all adds up. In the end, I was left with virtually no savings left - but thankfully I did have a job.

Oakland is often called the Bay Area's Brooklyn, but it's markedly different in that it is not as accessible to the city as the real Brooklyn is and getting around takes more effort as public transportation here is not great. This can feel isolating for some people. This might not be as much of a problem for you as you have a car (definitely keep it if you move to Oakland.) Oakland is also no longer the cheap housing hub it once was. My friends there are all seeing major rent increases. And as someone else touched on, SF is a sleepy little town compared to NY.

I'm a New Yorker who actually misses taking the subway at 3am so I'm very biased, but as a young person (especially in fashion) it sounds like NY would be the place to go. The social and professional opportunities in NY abound. It will be much harder to have a car but you can still find a fairly priced roommate situation in many parts of Brooklyn and Queens. It also sounds like you have friends in NY, and it's always helpful have supportive people around during times of transition.

No matter what you decide, line up a job first.
posted by blackcatcuriouser at 1:45 PM on July 29, 2015 [3 favorites]

I can speak to the "cross-country move" and "living in (well, near) San Francisco" parts, but not to the other regions or to opportunities in your particular line of work.

My cross-country move was from Pittsburgh to San Diego in 2004. I sold off most of my furniture and household items (I was a recent graduate so I didn't have much), shipped a bunch of boxes via USPS and FedEx, and packed everything else into my car. Professional moving services are expensive. We gave an employee moving with his family from DC several $thousand in relo budget, and my move just from San Diego to SF cost around $3K. For a cross-country move, even renting a U-Haul for that distance isn't cheap. It turned out to be more cost-effective to sell/dispose of and then replace a number of things. I flew out for, I think, two week-long visits to familiarize myself with the area and look at apartments. I eventually found a place via Craigslist and had a local friend view it for me but did not visit myself before moving in.

You will have a much easier time if you find a job first. For areas with a lower cost of living but a softer job market, there is no guarantee that you will find an acceptable job in any predictable time frame. You can burn through even a substantial savings reserve and worry about finding work becomes overbearing. I learned this the hard way and I really do not recommend this experience.

For areas with a better job market but higher cost of living, your savings obviously won't last nearly as long and there can be heavy competition for rentals. I moved from San Diego (expensive) to the San Francisco area (very expensive to eye-wateringly expensive depending on sub-region) about a year ago. I live in Oakland now, and when I was looking for apartments every open house was packed with people and the scrutiny during the application process felt like I was applying for a mortgage. One place wanted a co-signer for applicants that had held their job for less than a year.

Based on what you said about your interests and lifestyle priorities it sounds like NYC would be the better fit over San Francisco. SF has food culture, fine arts, festivals, etc but all on a smaller scale than NYC. Most places don't stay open late and our public transit network is just patchy enough that I would never give up my car (and I hate driving in SF). The economy here is strong overall but very tech industry focused. Rising prices, increased population, and shifting neighborhood demographics are causing a lot of tension. I am happy to work in SF and live in Oakland myself (plenty of local amenities but less frenetic and expensive) but it sounds like you really want to be in the heart of the city.

The biggest selling point in favor of NYC may be your existing friends/family network there. This will be a big help for your job searches, and my experience is that making friends in a new place gets harder post-school and as you get older. It took me at least a few years to build up a good network of friends when I moved to San Diego (early 20s, starting from scratch) and even here in the SFBA (mid 30s), where I have existing friends and family, it's hard to fit in to people's busy lives and established groups. A move like this is extremely disruptive even if you are enthusiastic about it, so having people there who can help you settle in is a real bonus.
posted by 4rtemis at 11:34 PM on July 29, 2015