Michael Winslow I am not.

May 27, 2015 6:50 AM

Parents of Mefi, how do I calm my baby without using the only thing that calms my baby: a running water faucet?

Mr Bird and I had a baby back in December. (Born six weeks early, so he's about 4 months old, adjusted age.) He's been a fussy colicky crying mess for almost the whole time we've had him, and while things are getting a bit better, we still have trouble soothing him. The only thing that works every. Single. Time. Is running a water faucet. He calms instantly and listens to the water. If he's having trouble eating, he'll scarf bottles if we stick them in his mouth while holding him near a running faucet. I want to soothe him without wasting a ton of water. I attempted to mimic the sound of the water using my voice, but Baby Bird did not buy or appreciate the subterfuge. Any suggestions?

Things we have tried that occasionally work but do not calm him regularly or for long:

- white noise. Oh, the white noise.
- radio static
- radio music
- musical/vibrating dog toy
- youtube videos of running water/faucets (wonderful links at this Metafilter post)
- shushing
- singing
- rocking/swaying/movement in general (swing is on the way, rock 'n play vibrations only piss him off)
- swaddling

I'm not looking for validation of running the water (aka this energy vs that arguments), I'm looking for a possible replacement soother. Maybe that's not possible but I'd love to find something less wasteful. I'll absolutely accept cantrips and sale-of-soul options.

Also I get that this is probably another thing that we as dewy-eyed parents need to wait out -- baby nervous system needs to grow and mature, baby soothing is a crapshoot anyway, etc -- but any suggestions you parents of colicky little ones might have would be incredibly helpful.

posted by pepper bird to Health & Fitness (26 answers total)

Best answer: What about one of those fountains that at least recirculates the same water?
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 6:52 AM on May 27, 2015 [33 favorites]

Big sand timer or one of those "rain sticks"? They sound a lot like water to me.
posted by epanalepsis at 6:55 AM on May 27, 2015 [4 favorites]

Best answer: Tabletop fountain, yes, something like this.
Initially set it up close to the faucet your baby likes and run both of them. If that works, then ease up on the faucet gradually until he's happy with just the fountain.
posted by mareli at 6:57 AM on May 27, 2015 [5 favorites]

Best answer: Came to say fountain! You can get little desktop sized ones that will keep the water circulating. Check amazon reviews carefully to find one with a quiet motor.
posted by phunniemee at 6:57 AM on May 27, 2015

Stepping away from "water" for a moment. One thing that helped my son was playing ambient music like this. There are tons of long clips on Youtube to choose from. It also helped me relax, which I believe was just as important. Good luck!
posted by davidvanb at 7:03 AM on May 27, 2015

Best answer: There's fountains for dogs and cats who don't like drinking water unless it's running - might be easier to find than something decorative, and the water flow might be stronger. Amazon has dog fountains for $25.
posted by aggyface at 7:03 AM on May 27, 2015 [2 favorites]

Can you record the sound of your specific faucet running and play that on a loop?
posted by Night_owl at 7:06 AM on May 27, 2015 [12 favorites]

I had a colicky baby with the same issue and I found a CD that worked of constant steady rain. My library has a pretty good selection to order thru the system.
posted by readery at 7:11 AM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]

Best answer: Can you use some or all of the water from running the faucet? Fill water bottles and drink out of them or fill a larger container and dump it into the toilet tank after you flush before the toilet finishes filling.
posted by martinX's bellbottoms at 7:18 AM on May 27, 2015

Spotify has lots and lots of nature water soundtracks - you can test them out to find one that the little guy likes.
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 7:18 AM on May 27, 2015

Came here to say record it and play it back. If a specific sink isn't required, somebody already recorded theirs.
posted by NordyneDefenceDynamics at 7:32 AM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]

White noise apps sometimes have a running water variation(s). Could you try a few out?
posted by mchorn at 7:49 AM on May 27, 2015

My husband would have to hold baby while actively squatting (up and down) or doing deep lunges and moaning like Eeyore in order to calm our 4mo baby. I think it was the jostling in the squatting and also his deep voice reverberating through his chest that helped calm baby down.

Good luck!
posted by jillithd at 7:56 AM on May 27, 2015 [5 favorites]

Our son was also born a few weeks early, and was quite colicky. Is he getting enough sleep? Have you been to a pediatric gastroenterologist? Getting a diagnosis of reflux was a big breakthrough for us- we got him on Zantac (yes, this exists for babies) and started sleeping him on a crib wedge, and the change in his temperament was swift and dramatic.
posted by mkultra at 8:17 AM on May 27, 2015

This magic colic soothing method has worked for my friends as well as on my daughter:

1. Lie baby face down across your lap, so that his stomach is across your thighs. You want your thighs causing pressure on his stomach.

2. Gently pat his lower back, thereby minimally increasing the pressure on his tummy in short bursts.

3. Sing or hum or talk baby talk or whatever you need to do to keep him soothed and you from losing your mind from boredom.

That's it. It always worked for my daughter, and I've since recommended it to friends, who also had success.

Good luck!!
posted by MexicanYenta at 8:28 AM on May 27, 2015

Have you tried a smartphone app like Sleep Pillow or SleepMachine? Instead of just white noise, they have sounds like fans and many different kinds of rain and railroad crossing and lawn mower (and yes both shower and sink, in Sleepmachine). You can mix up to three of them together at a time, even, and save the mix as a favorite.
posted by Lyn Never at 8:58 AM on May 27, 2015

These Cloud B sleep giraffes have four different sounds. I think three are water related: ocean waves, stream, rain (and then white noise). Might be worth a try. We've gotten a lot of use out of ours.

(Though I will second asking your pediatrician about any underlying medical possibilities, like reflux, gas, etc.)
posted by JenMarie at 9:03 AM on May 27, 2015

My kids' sound machines have options for rainfall, running stream, waterfall... One of those might work, no? It's a Conair sound machine and I got it on Amazon.
posted by amro at 9:48 AM on May 27, 2015

Best answer: Mini-Syn had reflux AND sensory processing issues (diagnosed later) which added up to SPECTACULAR "colic". He also loved watching running water from the tap, and for a while it was the only time of day he was not screamy. We later found we could get similar effects by sitting outside with him and watching breezes blow through leaves on trees (evergreens were not effective, but anything with leaves that trembled/waved worked.) Worth trying?
posted by synapse at 10:11 AM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]

Four months adjusted seems pretty old for colic. My youngest screamed a lot for the first 8 weeks of his life, and it turned out he had reflux and a milk protein allergy. He went on Prilosec and as I was breastfeeding, I stopped eating dairy. He was so screamy and I knew from my oldest they generally calm down about 6-8 weeks that I said straight-out to my ped that I just knew something was wrong, and lo, it was.

Make an appointment with the ped and ask about reflux. Also, once my son was able to sit it up, he was like a totally different baby - happy, smiling, etc. He's now 3 and he's still a pretty intense kid, but we are all happy now.

I am so sorry it's so hard - having a baby with colic is really, really difficult. I promise you that he will NOT be harmed if you need to put him in the crib and let him cry for 10-15 minutes, if you need a break or want to take a shower. Don't be afraid to ask people to help. I've taken screamy babies for walks so their moms or dads could rest and I just put on headphones and didn't mind.
posted by sutel at 10:50 AM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]

We use sound machines for both of our kids and have done so since they were infants. White noise or ocean waves noise. Seems to be helpful.
posted by Mid at 11:17 AM on May 27, 2015

Pet stores usually have some demo models of their fountains set up, so you could see how your baby likes the concept.
posted by teremala at 11:43 AM on May 27, 2015

Doing some "OMs" with baby on chest? That, or the fountain, but it might not be the water - it might be the pitch of the pipe, or the mesh on the spigot...
posted by olen at 11:49 AM on May 27, 2015

Best answer: Agree with tabletop fountain, although that might be more "tinkling splash" when you need "water running through an aerator". I suppose you could also continue to use the faucet but set up some kind of siphon/bucket in the sink and at least save the water for other uses.

You could also try running a fan, especially if it's the oscillating kind that moves back and forth and offers something hypnotic to watch.

I would focus on real-life sources of white noise like the fan/fountain etc. Our kids never liked recordings either, and it sounds like your little guy knows the difference.
posted by The Elusive Architeuthis at 12:18 PM on May 27, 2015

Response by poster: AskMe, you are fabulous! The fountain/pet refilling dish ideas are GENIUS. I'm also a little embarrassed I didn't think of saving the water I've been running to water plants w/ or empty into the toilet tank. Blame it on the [screamy colicky] baby brain, perhaps...

Our ped is a little too hands-off for my taste, but we're sticking with him for the moment (specific preterm issues that he wants to keep tabs on). At our last appointment, when I asked him how long "colic" lasted, he said we'd reassess at 6 months. Sensory processing issues might be a possibility, and we're talking with the ped and an OT about that. Baby bird isn't showing any other signs of reflux, but it's certainly a possibility? Thanks for the tip, I'll check it out.

"moaning like Eeyore" made me LOL. Clearly something we need to try.
posted by pepper bird at 3:45 PM on May 27, 2015 [1 favorite]

If you are going to try to save the water, don't forget about the life-hack of using a dustpan as the easiest way to divert the water from the faucet to a bucket.
posted by CathyG at 12:11 PM on May 28, 2015 [1 favorite]