Oh, you thought we were done with Xmas gift questions? Think again!
December 26, 2014 11:16 AM   Subscribe

I'll be celebrating christmas with my brother and his girlfriend a week late, but despite the extension, I still can't think of what to give them this year. There are many factors and a few critical elements up in the air, but if anyone can sort through it all and come up with something thoughtful and useful, it'd be Ask Metafilter.

These two have had the hardest, most ridiculous end-of-year. I want so badly to give them something that will bring them joy and hopefully ease their stress a little, but I just don't know what.

Complicating factors: Brother and girlfriend currently live in Los Angeles, but due to employment struggles and some health problems, they may not live there for much longer. As in, by the end of January they might be in another part of the country entirely. Or maybe not. So while they LOVE California, LA-specific gifts (restaurant certificates, CA day trips, warm weather clothing) are at best risky. Actually, "stuff" itself is kind of risky, since all of it might have to be either sold or packed in short order.

I have a little bit of money to spend on this, up to $200 or so, but would rather not spend more--if they move, I'd much rather have cash available to help them with that. My mother is planning to give them both spa certificates, and this seems like it's on the right track--it's something they couldn't afford for themselves, will be relaxing, and will not require packing or shipping.

TL;DR: Can anyone suggest physically small or (preferably) intangible, experience-type gifts for a struggling, stressed-out young couple possibly facing a huge move? Preferably something indulgent and/or a bit romantical? Their tastes are pretty wide and fairly mainstream, so I'm considering all suggestions.

Answers will automatically land you on Santa's "nice" list next year.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese to Shopping (16 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
 
Gas station gift cards.
posted by oceanjesse at 11:22 AM on December 26, 2014


How about a Visa/MasterCard/AmEx Gift Card? Portable and useful anywhere major credit cards are accepted!
posted by Hanuman1960 at 11:22 AM on December 26, 2014 [6 favorites]


Response by poster: Oh, oops...one more complication: They no longer have a car, so gas cards and car-related gifts are out. (Alas, I don't have the money to buy them a car.)
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 11:30 AM on December 26, 2014


No car in LA, you say? How about an Uber gift card? Just a thought...
posted by Chrischris at 11:39 AM on December 26, 2014 [2 favorites]


Take them out to their favorite mid upscale restaurant. If their budget is hit they likely eat out a lot less. Do it right, desert, booze and everything (if they drink)
posted by edgeways at 11:39 AM on December 26, 2014


I agree with Hanuman1960's idea. If they've got employment struggles AND might be moving, it might be a huge relief to have some financial wiggle room. It's not the most creative, personalized gift, but they won't have to box it up to move it and if I were in your brother's shoes, I'd be so grateful. They can choose to use it for a fancy dinner if they're feeling like indulging or they can use it for something practical.
posted by VioletU at 11:48 AM on December 26, 2014 [4 favorites]


When your life is complicated, cash is the best gift.
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 11:57 AM on December 26, 2014 [10 favorites]


A bottle of great wine and a Trader Joe's gift card...for their [possible] last month of LA wining and dining.
posted by calgirl at 12:04 PM on December 26, 2014 [1 favorite]


A variation on Hanuman1960's debit card: cash or a check --- like the Visa//MasterCard/AmEx gift card, very portable and useful anywhere.
posted by easily confused at 12:04 PM on December 26, 2014


I say this as a poor person:

Cash. In the easiest format for them to spend. A check to deposit into their account, or PayPal if they have it.

Seriously. Money they can spend. Prepaid debit cards are okay, but it can be hard to wring the last few dollars out of them / easy to forget or lose track of how much is on them.
posted by bilabial at 12:07 PM on December 26, 2014 [10 favorites]


I would get them a gift card to a decent restaurant where I feel the food is healthy and the experience feels indulgent. I would basically force them to eat well at least one night. Top of my list: Outback Steakhouse or Chipotle.

If you want, with my blessing, you can attach some sort of nicely printed list of cheap options at either of these two places (depending on what gift card you get them) to help them eat well and feel good about stretching the gift:
Dear Brother, feel free to blow this entire card on one good meal. But if that galls you, keep in mind that you can call Outback's and get it to go, saving you the cost of their $3.00 sodas and the necessity of leaving a tip. Plus, not all items on the menu are outrageously priced. A loaded baked potato is a mere $3.00. So is a cup of soup. Plus, if you love their Bloomin' Onion but find it is just too much to eat and too much money to spend for an appetizer, you can now add Bloomin' Petals to any meal for a mere buck. A single meal to go can handily feed two people at home, without breaking the bank or ruining your waistline.

Dear Brother, feel free to blow this entire card on one or two good meals. But if that galls you, keep in mind that Chipotle's menu listing of prices for tacos is for THREE tacos. It is perfectly okay to order a single taco, which will cost you less than $3.00 (exact price varies depending on what you fill it with). You can also get a large cheese quesadilla for $3.65 plus tax or a small one for $1.35 plus tax. A single taco plus a small cheese quesadilla and cup of water is quite filling and will run you in the neighborhood of $4.50.

Eat up in good health!
It's really hard to try to prioritize taking physical care of yourself when money is tight and the world seems to be falling apart around you. But taking physical care of yourself is one of the best things you can do in that situation. You can't make them get off their butt and go to the gym or whatever (and that might be too much anyway at the moment), but you can nicely put a gun to their head and say "Have a decent meal, damnit-- on me!"

Best of luck.
posted by Michele in California at 1:42 PM on December 26, 2014 [1 favorite]


The thing is, if they are truly in desperate straits, a gift card for a fancy restaurant is not really that helpful. Getting them a Visa gift card or cash gives them real financial flexibility. I would not be wanting to go to a fancy restaurant if I had other options to spend the money.
posted by jcworth at 5:19 PM on December 26, 2014 [2 favorites]


Gift certificate to local cleaning service.
posted by bq at 8:59 PM on December 26, 2014


Seriously, give them money.
posted by cotton dress sock at 9:39 PM on December 26, 2014


I agree with others who say to give cash, but if you feel like that is too impersonal, give mostly cash plus something small. Ask to go in on the spa gift certificates with your Mom, or get them a six-month subscription to some website or streaming service -- Netflix, Rdio, etc. -- which would be portable, take their minds off their problems, and something they probably would not buy for themselves.
posted by amicus at 10:22 PM on December 26, 2014


I had a similar situation, in that my parents came to visit me this year, and didn't want to take anything home. So I went out and got them a mixed case of wines that we have had some fun trying. There are still several bottles left, but it's been really fun, and usually they'd be buying wine for every night anyway. A case may be too much, but that's what worked here.
posted by Stewriffic at 6:18 AM on December 28, 2014


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