Whatever gets you out of bed in the morning
October 11, 2014 6:48 PM Subscribe
I'm looking for phrases to use when you see someone who has a strong passion the appeal of which you just cannot understand--a passion that appears to be one of the things the person lives for, one of the things that gets them out of bed in the morning. (I'm looking for secular passions, not religious ones.) Funny is good but not required.
The thing that just reminded me of this is Comic Con. Personally I have not one bit of interest in that stuff. But there are clearly tons and tons of people who have a fervor for it. So I say to myself, unable to understand: "whatever gets you out of bed in the morning." And I mean that not dismissively but sympathetically, even existentially so. I think we have a deep need to immerse ourselves in something, and distract ourselves from the rest of the frightening, uncertain, incomprehensible larger world. Sort of along the lines of this quote: “The final belief is to believe in a fiction, which you know to be a fiction, there being nothing else. The exquisite truth is to know that it is a fiction and that you believe in it willingly." (I'm looking for just a short sentence really, not a long thing like that.) Or when DFW in Infinite Jest describes our need to "give ourselves away" to something as "a flight-from in the form of a plunging-into." (a flight from the fear, loneliness, boredom, pain? all of the above and more?)
Here's a few that I don't like:
"whatever floats your boat"
"whatever tickles your pickle"
"to each his/her own"
The thing that just reminded me of this is Comic Con. Personally I have not one bit of interest in that stuff. But there are clearly tons and tons of people who have a fervor for it. So I say to myself, unable to understand: "whatever gets you out of bed in the morning." And I mean that not dismissively but sympathetically, even existentially so. I think we have a deep need to immerse ourselves in something, and distract ourselves from the rest of the frightening, uncertain, incomprehensible larger world. Sort of along the lines of this quote: “The final belief is to believe in a fiction, which you know to be a fiction, there being nothing else. The exquisite truth is to know that it is a fiction and that you believe in it willingly." (I'm looking for just a short sentence really, not a long thing like that.) Or when DFW in Infinite Jest describes our need to "give ourselves away" to something as "a flight-from in the form of a plunging-into." (a flight from the fear, loneliness, boredom, pain? all of the above and more?)
Here's a few that I don't like:
"whatever floats your boat"
"whatever tickles your pickle"
"to each his/her own"
It's a long dark night . . . whatever gets you through it.
posted by ainsley at 7:03 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by ainsley at 7:03 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
I use "everyone needs a hobby" for this kind of thing.
posted by pemberkins at 7:03 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by pemberkins at 7:03 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
"Dave's got his own agenda."
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 7:07 PM on October 11, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 7:07 PM on October 11, 2014 [2 favorites]
On preview, sorry, missed that you didn't like that one.
posted by patheral at 7:10 PM on October 11, 2014
posted by patheral at 7:10 PM on October 11, 2014
It's not my favorite chapter, but it is part of the book.
posted by 724A at 7:19 PM on October 11, 2014 [3 favorites]
posted by 724A at 7:19 PM on October 11, 2014 [3 favorites]
"Whatever makes you tick."
posted by AppleTurnover at 7:29 PM on October 11, 2014
posted by AppleTurnover at 7:29 PM on October 11, 2014
"That's what makes horse races."
By the way, the japanese word お宅 otaku is used in the US to mean a fan of anime, but in Japan it means anyone who is obsessed by some single subject, no matter what. Train spotters are otaku, and so are gun freaks, for example.
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 7:32 PM on October 11, 2014 [2 favorites]
By the way, the japanese word お宅 otaku is used in the US to mean a fan of anime, but in Japan it means anyone who is obsessed by some single subject, no matter what. Train spotters are otaku, and so are gun freaks, for example.
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 7:32 PM on October 11, 2014 [2 favorites]
A now-deceased friend of mine used to say, "If we agreed about everything, one of us wouldn't be necessary."
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 7:33 PM on October 11, 2014 [20 favorites]
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 7:33 PM on October 11, 2014 [20 favorites]
And I mean that not dismissively but sympathetically, even existentially so. I think we have a deep need to immerse ourselves in something, and distract ourselves from the rest of the frightening, uncertain, incomprehensible larger world.
Hmm. As someone who hears these phrases a lot (in reference to my own esoteric interests), I'd warn you that they can sure sound dismissive. All the suggestions you've gotten so far would bug me to varying extents (except Chocolate Pickle's horse race phrase, which I don't understand!). Consider that people may pursue their hobbies not to distract themselves from anything, but because they find those hobbies intrinsically engaging.
All that said... one phrase that doesn't bother me is "That's [name]'s thing."
posted by aws17576 at 7:34 PM on October 11, 2014 [5 favorites]
Hmm. As someone who hears these phrases a lot (in reference to my own esoteric interests), I'd warn you that they can sure sound dismissive. All the suggestions you've gotten so far would bug me to varying extents (except Chocolate Pickle's horse race phrase, which I don't understand!). Consider that people may pursue their hobbies not to distract themselves from anything, but because they find those hobbies intrinsically engaging.
All that said... one phrase that doesn't bother me is "That's [name]'s thing."
posted by aws17576 at 7:34 PM on October 11, 2014 [5 favorites]
"I respect that" said with a "hmm, not bad" face.
posted by michaelh at 7:42 PM on October 11, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by michaelh at 7:42 PM on October 11, 2014 [2 favorites]
"That's awesome that you found something that really resonates with you." And I say it sincerely, because even if I can't understand their "thing," I find genuine passion and having the guts to let your freak flag fly to be really refreshing.
posted by blazingunicorn at 7:50 PM on October 11, 2014 [5 favorites]
posted by blazingunicorn at 7:50 PM on October 11, 2014 [5 favorites]
Every peg has its hole
Everyone beats to their own drummer
Every ship has an anchor
Dreaming is imagination; imagination is dreaming made whole; reality is a dreamed imagination made into a box that becomes our world, so welcome to the corner of my world.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 7:54 PM on October 11, 2014
Everyone beats to their own drummer
Every ship has an anchor
Dreaming is imagination; imagination is dreaming made whole; reality is a dreamed imagination made into a box that becomes our world, so welcome to the corner of my world.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 7:54 PM on October 11, 2014
Do your thing
That's your jam
You have no chance of survival. Make your time. (that one's a joke along with anything containing the word "jollies")
posted by aydeejones at 7:57 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
That's your jam
You have no chance of survival. Make your time. (that one's a joke along with anything containing the word "jollies")
posted by aydeejones at 7:57 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
re "That's what makes horse races":
My sorrel is the faster horse.posted by Chocolate Pickle at 8:05 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
No, my palamino is faster.
The Sorrel.
The Palamino.
THE SORREL!
THE PALAMINO!
...alright you guys, stop shouting. Why not race them and see?
Whatever cranks your gears
posted by Noisy Pink Bubbles at 8:14 PM on October 11, 2014
posted by Noisy Pink Bubbles at 8:14 PM on October 11, 2014
Whatever fuels your fire.
posted by 724A at 8:17 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by 724A at 8:17 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
Live and let live.
posted by Sassyfras at 8:25 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by Sassyfras at 8:25 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
There is an ass for every seat.
posted by blnkfrnk at 8:27 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by blnkfrnk at 8:27 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
I believe in nothing; everything is sacred.
I believe in everything; nothing is sacred.
posted by a humble nudibranch at 8:39 PM on October 11, 2014 [3 favorites]
I believe in everything; nothing is sacred.
posted by a humble nudibranch at 8:39 PM on October 11, 2014 [3 favorites]
Different strokes for different folks.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:47 PM on October 11, 2014
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:47 PM on October 11, 2014
Whatever blows your skirt up.
posted by bricoleur at 8:54 PM on October 11, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by bricoleur at 8:54 PM on October 11, 2014 [2 favorites]
People who like this sort of thing will find this the sort of thing they like. (attributed to Abraham Lincoln; I'm too lazy to look that up)
posted by bricoleur at 8:56 PM on October 11, 2014
posted by bricoleur at 8:56 PM on October 11, 2014
You do you.
posted by AppleTurnover at 9:16 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by AppleTurnover at 9:16 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
I'm not actually a Pink Floyd fan, but I often look at folks like that and think, "Shine on, you crazy diamond." When it makes me happy to see someone else doing the thing that for unknown reasons makes them especially happy, I also think of what Mallory Ortberg quoted someone saying about tambourine guy: "He’s living his best life."
posted by Monsieur Caution at 9:21 PM on October 11, 2014 [18 favorites]
posted by Monsieur Caution at 9:21 PM on October 11, 2014 [18 favorites]
It'd be a funny old world if we were all alike.
posted by Diablevert at 9:27 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by Diablevert at 9:27 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
Whatever bloats your stoat.
posted by WidgetAlley at 9:54 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by WidgetAlley at 9:54 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
More power to ya
posted by lunastellasol at 9:55 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by lunastellasol at 9:55 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
Everyone should let their freak flag fly, as blazing unicorn says. (from here before here)
I think we have a deep need to immerse ourselves in something, and distract ourselves from the rest of the frightening, uncertain, incomprehensible larger world.
I did want to concur that this sounds dismissive.
posted by jessamyn at 10:35 PM on October 11, 2014
I think we have a deep need to immerse ourselves in something, and distract ourselves from the rest of the frightening, uncertain, incomprehensible larger world.
I did want to concur that this sounds dismissive.
posted by jessamyn at 10:35 PM on October 11, 2014
Well, it keeps the kids off the drugs.
posted by vorpal bunny at 10:47 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by vorpal bunny at 10:47 PM on October 11, 2014 [1 favorite]
I always say "gotta be who you are" when describing myself.
posted by Pardon Our Dust at 1:38 AM on October 12, 2014
posted by Pardon Our Dust at 1:38 AM on October 12, 2014
As long as you don't do it in the street and scare the horses. (This may be too ancient to work, but I have fond memories of my mother saying it.)
posted by kestralwing at 3:18 AM on October 12, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by kestralwing at 3:18 AM on October 12, 2014 [2 favorites]
Several of the lines in Whatever Gets You Through the Night seem to have this meaning. "Don't need a gun to blow your mind." "It's Your Thing," too.
Otherwise yes, this kind of thing tends to sound dismissive. Cf. "a lid for every pot."
posted by BibiRose at 6:03 AM on October 12, 2014
Otherwise yes, this kind of thing tends to sound dismissive. Cf. "a lid for every pot."
posted by BibiRose at 6:03 AM on October 12, 2014
"Homo sum, humani nihil a me alienum puto", or "I am a human being, I consider nothing that is human alien to me."
"Life is a rich tapestry." (I dunno if this is from something. Mallory Ortberg of the Toast says it on Twitter all the time.)
posted by clavicle at 6:24 AM on October 12, 2014 [1 favorite]
"Life is a rich tapestry." (I dunno if this is from something. Mallory Ortberg of the Toast says it on Twitter all the time.)
posted by clavicle at 6:24 AM on October 12, 2014 [1 favorite]
This question has sat with me since I read it. I'd usually say "that's awesome" or "what really grabs you about that?"
For me, I don't have to give or withhold approval or convey my own interest level. All the phrases above sound dismissive to me because they are trying to place the passion in the context of a sort of "everyone does it." Which is fine. But for me the nature of understanding someone's passion is recognizing that as common an experience it is, in the actual moment it is anything but ordinary. It is gripping and transporting. So for me part of the joy of being there with someone having that moment is, well, to let them have it.
posted by warriorqueen at 9:11 AM on October 12, 2014 [3 favorites]
For me, I don't have to give or withhold approval or convey my own interest level. All the phrases above sound dismissive to me because they are trying to place the passion in the context of a sort of "everyone does it." Which is fine. But for me the nature of understanding someone's passion is recognizing that as common an experience it is, in the actual moment it is anything but ordinary. It is gripping and transporting. So for me part of the joy of being there with someone having that moment is, well, to let them have it.
posted by warriorqueen at 9:11 AM on October 12, 2014 [3 favorites]
De gustibus non est disputandum ( In matters of taste, there can be no disputes).
But are you looking for something to say to yourself, or something (not dismissively but sympathetically) to say to other people? Your question is not clear.
posted by caryatid at 9:37 AM on October 12, 2014
But are you looking for something to say to yourself, or something (not dismissively but sympathetically) to say to other people? Your question is not clear.
posted by caryatid at 9:37 AM on October 12, 2014
"You live your life."
I say this a lot, with the delivery being an encouraging imperative. I think it usually also conveys the message, "You're doing fine" (which I also say all the time). Not sure this would work for everyone, but people seem to respond positively when I've said it before.
"You can do what you wanna do in living color," also works.
posted by banal retentive at 9:40 AM on October 12, 2014
I say this a lot, with the delivery being an encouraging imperative. I think it usually also conveys the message, "You're doing fine" (which I also say all the time). Not sure this would work for everyone, but people seem to respond positively when I've said it before.
"You can do what you wanna do in living color," also works.
posted by banal retentive at 9:40 AM on October 12, 2014
"Fair enough."
posted by Perodicticus potto at 10:38 AM on October 12, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by Perodicticus potto at 10:38 AM on October 12, 2014 [1 favorite]
'That's the kind of thing for the kind of person who likes that kind of thing!'
--which I've always seen attributed to Lincoln.
A now-deceased friend of mine used to say, "If we agreed about everything, one of us wouldn't be necessary."
I'm glad you didn't end up with the short straw. :)
posted by jamjam at 10:41 AM on October 12, 2014
--which I've always seen attributed to Lincoln.
A now-deceased friend of mine used to say, "If we agreed about everything, one of us wouldn't be necessary."
I'm glad you didn't end up with the short straw. :)
posted by jamjam at 10:41 AM on October 12, 2014
My partner likes to say "Whatever turns your crank", but I assume you wouldn't like it if you don't like "whatever tickles your pickle"!
In Spanish we say "cada oveja con su pareja", which means "every sheep has its partner", which admittedly is more snappy when it rhymes. That is more of a "birds of a feather flock together" idea, but it is also said in the same way as some of the previous, that, you know, good on you for finding your thing.
posted by chainsofreedom at 11:21 AM on October 12, 2014
In Spanish we say "cada oveja con su pareja", which means "every sheep has its partner", which admittedly is more snappy when it rhymes. That is more of a "birds of a feather flock together" idea, but it is also said in the same way as some of the previous, that, you know, good on you for finding your thing.
posted by chainsofreedom at 11:21 AM on October 12, 2014
Coming back with Mr K's favorite "Whatever gets you through the night." He was stunned when he discovered John Lennon liked it, too.
posted by kestralwing at 1:40 PM on October 12, 2014
posted by kestralwing at 1:40 PM on October 12, 2014
You go, girl.
posted by Michele in California at 4:32 PM on October 12, 2014
posted by Michele in California at 4:32 PM on October 12, 2014
I have been know to remark to 'fanatical' fans of enthusiasms that I do not happen to share:
"We each worship in our own way."
(And yes, this has always been said of secular and not of religious enthusiasms).
posted by AsYouKnow Bob at 8:45 PM on October 12, 2014
"We each worship in our own way."
(And yes, this has always been said of secular and not of religious enthusiasms).
posted by AsYouKnow Bob at 8:45 PM on October 12, 2014
Cool, the comic-shaped puzzle piece fits your brain perfectly.
Nice, Your brain has the perfect hole to fit the comic-shaped puzzle piece.
It's fantastic when we find "that" thing which tickles our brain.
Comics, for you, "Es muss sein". - It's your fate, you have no choice but to do it.
I feel that any of the ones that start with "Whatever..." sound dismissive and you'd have to be really careful with tone and facial expression when using them.
posted by guy72277 at 1:44 AM on October 13, 2014 [1 favorite]
Nice, Your brain has the perfect hole to fit the comic-shaped puzzle piece.
It's fantastic when we find "that" thing which tickles our brain.
Comics, for you, "Es muss sein". - It's your fate, you have no choice but to do it.
I feel that any of the ones that start with "Whatever..." sound dismissive and you'd have to be really careful with tone and facial expression when using them.
posted by guy72277 at 1:44 AM on October 13, 2014 [1 favorite]
I remembered that I actually say to people when they're talking about doing something that I have no interest in doing at all (like going to a horror movie)...
"You (or y'all if it's two or more) have fun with that."
posted by patheral at 9:37 AM on October 13, 2014 [1 favorite]
"You (or y'all if it's two or more) have fun with that."
posted by patheral at 9:37 AM on October 13, 2014 [1 favorite]
The things that have worked best when I talk about how much I love snakes to non-snake-people aren't pat phrases, they're actual statements. "It's awesome to see someone so passionate about something." "I'm glad you found something you care so much about." Things that genuinely mean that you think it's cool when something, even something you don't relate to, make other people very happy and provide them with something bigger to be a part of. Even if you're only saying it to yourself, "I love that she's so enthusiastic about that" is going to induce a more genuine feeling of warmth and connection than "Eh, whatever [rhyme]s your [rhyme]." And I think that connecting to the idea of passion is a good thing, even if it's not a passion you share or understand at all. Admiring that aspect of others makes you more likely to value it in yourself, and being passionate about something leads to a much fuller life.
posted by Because at 8:22 AM on October 14, 2014
posted by Because at 8:22 AM on October 14, 2014
My standard is "Enjoy it without me." It works for just about everything.
posted by starbreaker at 4:32 PM on November 4, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by starbreaker at 4:32 PM on November 4, 2014 [1 favorite]
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by Rob Rockets at 7:01 PM on October 11, 2014 [2 favorites]