How to nurture your playful, imaginative side as an adult?

September 16, 2014 2:22 AM

I feel really sad that this part of me (maybe most adults) gets so buried and don't know what steps to take to begin to rectify it? It doesn't help that I am prone to hideous depressions and typically work with wounded people (though sometimes approach this creatively). I am passionate about a very serious project.

I have tried crafting.. it helps a tad. I'm generally ok with trying 'new' stuff and often attract (as friends) quite amusing/fun/thoughtful (but busy) people... I am still creative in certain respects, eg cooking or unusual ideas but want to reach the deeper buried riches..

I have tried to sit down and write from my imgaination... it doesn't work, it always ends up looking like a barely concealed reflection of my life.

Improvisation (I've 'asked' on this before here) at acting school makes me dry up, though I enjoy it when I see it working with others.

I was a very imaginative child (never one for running around much) but loved dressing up boxes (I dress in 'my own way' even now) making things and talking, talking talking. I still talk loads but it can veer to the dark if I'm in a certain place.

So I'm going to try reading fairy tales...
I'd like to spend more time round kids and am going to try and organise this.. but what else can I try??

posted by tanktop to Media & Arts (24 answers total)

Is there a makerspace or hackerspace in your area? That is where you'll generally find the curious and playful folks. Don't be afraid that it's too techy, it very often is not as techy as you may think.
posted by Too-Ticky at 3:59 AM on September 16, 2014

Go for walks, take baths, try new things, meet new people. Go on Youtube binges of weird new subjects, music, movies. Adopt a new persona in a new milieu (especially easy online).
posted by Drexen at 4:40 AM on September 16, 2014

Change up your routine. Take a different route to work.

Maybe try visual journaling?

You might find The Artist's Way helpful. Part of her method is to write "Morning Pages" daily...I believe it's 6 pages of whatever comes to mind. The idea is that you have to keep writing until you fill up all the pages. It helps get it all out and make room for creativity. I personally didn't make it through the book because I found it so writing-centric but you mention writing so it might be useful for you.

Also, not to get all psycho-babbley, but have you ever thought of when you stopped nurturing this creative imaginative side of yourself? Did someone say something to you that stuck with you? Reject an idea of yours? Something that made you repress this urge for creativity?
posted by Shadow Boxer at 5:19 AM on September 16, 2014

I found dungeons and dragons really awakened this part of me. You are basically telling a story with a group of people. The dm has the frame work that you hang your imagination off of, its a group experience so out becomes a combined story, you are encouraged tip imagine you are someone else and its social. You basically sit around in a circle telling a story with enough random elements due to five tools to keep you thinking on your feet. It's okay time for grown ups.
posted by wwax at 5:26 AM on September 16, 2014 [7 favorites]

On writing, one thing that worked for me was googling up great works of art and then writing a story to fit the scene. After a while I got some ideas I liked enough that I wanted to detach them from the painting. None of this ever led to any decent literary product, but I enjoyed it and it certainly got the imagination running.
posted by Segundus at 5:28 AM on September 16, 2014 [7 favorites]

I've never suffered from a lack of imagination, but I think you're going about this all wrong. You aren't a toddler. You can't ever go back to being one. You can't look at life like a child because you've seen too much.

I would focus on loose prompts. It gives you enough structure to not completely make stuff up, but it free enough to draw out your imagination. I would also focus on exposing yourself to new things. I know you said you're not scared of new experiences, but regardless it's easy to just doo the same things you always do. Get uncomfortable. That is where growth lies.
posted by Aranquis at 5:38 AM on September 16, 2014 [2 favorites]

What do you do for work? Is there a way to be playful in that context? Decorating someone's cube, elaborate concepts for office events, starting a workplace book club.

I found taking writing classes to be the best form of incentive. Knowing there was an assignment and a whole class would be reading my work really lit a fire under me.
posted by Lieber Frau at 5:47 AM on September 16, 2014

D&D is great for this, with the bonus that rather than feeling like you gave up your childhood imagination, it starts feeling like you just acquired the life experience to be EVEN BETTER AT IT.

Also, while I'm crafty generally, something that has really delighted me lately is periodically taking up something new, not as Serious Business, but just in the same way I would have as a kid. Which is to say, impulse-purchasing a cheap watercolor set and spending a few hours just messing with it. Or crayons.

I've been learning Javascript on top of already having picked up some HTML/CSS, and it reminds me of nothing so much as playing with legos as a kid. Once you know how the blocks work, you get to combine them all kinds of ways. Doing it as a hobby means that you can just do it however you want, not however someone tells you to do it, of course. Just generally, if you're used to creating things in some particular medium, try creating things in a very different medium. I realize web development does not seem very childlike at first glance, but I think I may have actually shrieked aloud the first time I made something spin when I hovered the mouse over it. I may just be very easily amused.
posted by Sequence at 5:51 AM on September 16, 2014 [5 favorites]

I look forward to further answers and thank you for this question.

My main thought, which you don't have to answer, is do you have professional support, are you able to profit from discussion with colleagues? Because even with training to guard against it, other people's heaviness is catching, and I think it's important to be vigilant about that. If there are resources that way you haven't tapped, it might be good to tap them.

Second, you sound a bit lonely. If you are, it makes sense that you'd crave play -- it's inherently social, and involves trusting others enough to shed the defenses we need to march through our obligations. It might be structured and have an ostensible goal (like in games), but it's basically light, spontaneous, and is its own end. Like, it's not as serious as 'creativity', which we often invest with something like a sense of vocation, and maybe the need to produce an outcome (which we then use to measure ourselves, again). Play isn't like that and I think that's its virtue. If there aren't any people available to play with right now, animals are reliable and know how to do it -- have you got any pets (if not would you get one)?

The play of 'flow' I think comes after a certain point of mastery. Like it's really not fun to play scales on the piano, but you've got to know them to get to the pleasure of executing a proper song. If you haven't written consistently or for long, I think it's ok to accept that it might take time to build up enough comfort and skill to loosen up.
posted by cotton dress sock at 5:54 AM on September 16, 2014 [5 favorites]

I started photography as a serious hobby about a year ago. I am a word person and in my head a lot. Thinking visually and -really- looking at things differently is such a new thing for me. (Morning light! Who knew?) And it forces me to interact with people outside my regular circle of friends and colleagues and go to places I wouldn't usually go. It has reawakened my creativity and willingness to play in a way I didn't expect.
posted by marguerite at 6:13 AM on September 16, 2014

How is your spontaneity in general? Kids seem to have fun wherever they are, and can turn anything into a game. Maybe you can work on releasing your natural side. I like to read about Maslow's concept of a self-actualized person (alternative link here) and that helps me get in touch with my sense of flow.

Also maybe re-think what it means to be creative. It doesn't have to be art or writing. It can be creative solutions to every day problems.

Finally I find creativity comes out of boredom. After 1-2 weeks of travel I start to cough out all kinds of creative ideas.

Don't ever judge what you create. Just let it out.
posted by St. Peepsburg at 6:14 AM on September 16, 2014 [2 favorites]

In addition to D&D which has been mentioned, other role-playing games, particularly those that focus on a story telling element (e.g. Fiasco) are great for this.
posted by Laura_J at 6:32 AM on September 16, 2014

Nation f'n Treasure Lynda Barry teaches workshops that she often describes as coaxing adults to draw and write as freely as they did as children.

Here is a long, excellent interview with the AV Club on her methods.

She's written three books based on her workshops:
What It Is
Picture This
Syllabus
posted by Juliet Banana at 6:37 AM on September 16, 2014 [8 favorites]

I wanted to add to my previous D&D suggestion that you find time to be bored. Being bored and daydreaming is a great way to get your imagination flowing. I will imagine the most amazing stories while half dozing on long haul flights, that vanish as soon as I hit the craziness of the airport. I find long solitary walks are also great for this. Sometimes you just have to be still so you can hear your imagination over all the noise & bustle of just getting through a day.

Oh and I apologize for all the weird words in my above post, I should not try and answer anything on my tablet without my glasses on. Hopefully you got the gist of it. Spellcheck is the enemy. :(
posted by wwax at 6:46 AM on September 16, 2014

If you like talking, try reading aloud. Yes, to yourself. And get a costume that you can wear while you do it, even if it's just an outlandish scarf or hat. Act out the stories. Do funny voices for the characters. Read out loud in the bath.

Play. Go out and buy fingerpaints and crayons and pastels and watercolors and paper and play. Paint something and discard it the way a kid would. Divorce yourself from expectations of outcome. Play. Reach back to the time before words and coherence and connect with the kid who just wanted to put color on the page.

I'm also a potter and I spend a lot of time with clay. When starting a new project or learning a new technique, I always give myself a few weeks to months to just play with the supplies. I call everything a "test" and expect nothing from it until I start hitting on outcomes that I like. I often make things that make no sense to anyone, including myself. I give myself permission to break every rule (except the rules imposed by the material itself). During that period, I never listen to others when they critique or criticize my work. This is also a form of play.

Juliet Banana directs you to Lynda Barry and I do to. I LOVE Lynda Barry. Her website, where you can follow along with the class she teaches at UW-Madison is The Near-Sighted Monkey.

If you like to write, also check out Natalie Goldberg's Writing Down the Bones.
posted by GoLikeHellMachine at 6:52 AM on September 16, 2014 [1 favorite]

Walking and running kickstart my imagination, especially if I'm outdoors and not listening to music. It gets the blood going to my brain, it leaves me alone with nothing but my imagination to entertain me, and it helps my depression.

I'd also recommend generally increasing the amount of creative work you see - it's all around you if you keep your eyes open. Everything you read or see can become inspiration. Go to art shows, watch over-the-top music videos, spend an afternoon getting lost on Pinterest or TVTropes, hang out in bookstores even if you only look at the covers.

Pursuing a childlike sense of imagination by trying to recreate the things you did as a child can sometimes be a dead end, because we can't help looking at those things differently now. Kids are creative because they can let their minds wander, because so much in the world is new and exciting to them, and because they aren't restricted by the "right" way to do things. Recreate those conditions, and imagination will follow.
posted by Metroid Baby at 7:04 AM on September 16, 2014

You mentioned you will try to hang around kids more, and I would endorse that as a great way to get in touch with your more playful side. I will say though, as an aunt who spends a lot of time with her nieces and nephews and as someone who spends time with neighborhood kids, that it is important to enter into kids' play worlds with patience. I have spent hours playing with action figures or make-believe games. Just this weekend, my nephews and I had great fun with an umbrella and a make-believe baseball game. My experience of entering play with children is that play can last for hours, and you need to be able to slow down your adult sense of time to really experience that child-like sense of playfulness. I find it very rewarding, but I will say most other adults I know have difficulty turning off their sense of "I have other things I need to be doing!" to fully enter into that place of play. Does it make me more creative in other aspects of my life? I think so -- in pursuit of play with my nieces and nephews I've made short movies, made up songs, created scavenger hunts, made handmade gifts, and collaborated on imaginative stories. It's all great fun. Go find some kids!
posted by megancita at 7:20 AM on September 16, 2014 [4 favorites]

I know you said that improv classes didn't really work for you, but how about a beginning acting class? That way you have a little more structure to work with and yet can still bring your creativity to a role. I did it this summer and it felt like a scheduled 3-hour playtime every week - now I'm looking for another class to take!
posted by DingoMutt at 9:53 AM on September 16, 2014

I was a very imaginative child (never one for running around much) but loved dressing up boxes (I dress in 'my own way' even now) making things and talking, talking talking.

Do this. Do it a lot and do it various objects.

Frankly, the world as it is is rather boring, so I like to populate it with various characters based on things around me. The pecan tree out back is named Agness, the car Pempleton and my wife's car is Lexis, the iPhone is named Archer.

When we're out at dinner, I may name the salt and pepper shakers (or other condiments) and have them converse with others or each other. I love going to get sushi because then I can use chopsticks to as legs for various things.

Yes, I have a job and mortgage and too many doctor visits and various other adult duties. But I play with the things and reality because it makes me smile and laugh, i.e. makes me happy, so I'm going to keep doing it.

So, break out the boxes and dress'em up. Have fun and play, because it's who you and that's wonderful!
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 10:08 AM on September 16, 2014 [4 favorites]

I forgot -- it's not really play as such (or maybe it is), but for me anyway, dancing is the best -- great and easy way to just shake things out and express yourself (strike a pose, what have you -- mine are potentially embarrassing, but I don't care. Haven't done it in ages and it's necessary, because I've been a huge stick in the mud lately -- really grateful you're thinking about this and let us think about it. It's not just for kids and it is important, because, really, what are things for otherwise.)
posted by cotton dress sock at 10:26 AM on September 16, 2014 [1 favorite]

Be curious and excited about the world. Let yourself learn things (or learn about things) just for fun. It's like bringing in the emotional and intellectual raw materials needed to create new things (whether it's art, writing, whatever).
posted by Flipping_Hades_Terwilliger at 11:36 AM on September 16, 2014 [1 favorite]

Give yourself permission to feel awe and delight. Sunsets, buildings, the way a day fit together really well; I was gushing over a can of tomato paste last weekend.

Also give yourself permission to be ugly. Here's an example from dance: if you lift your leg behind your body, there is a risk of looking like a dog preparing to urinate. When you're trying to make dance, are you going to get the best result by trying to improvise all the while avoiding this ugly position?

No -- you move freely, accepting that there will be ugly points that you can edit out later once you've discovered how you wanted to move and what you wanted to say. Depending on what you settled on, those ugly points may then become points of strength.
posted by batter_my_heart at 1:08 PM on September 16, 2014

I see that you've already said you're going to spend more time around kids, which is an excellent idea - a few years back I babysat for a couple of kids regularly, and it was almost always the most fun part of my day. Nothing like a good lightsaber battle or romp at the park to make you feel playful and imaginative again! Just be sure that you are getting in on those lightsaber battles and park romps while you're there - I'm pretty sure I (and the kids in my care) were having a lot more fun than the babysitters at the park who just sat on the bench and read their books.

Along the same lines, if you like dogs I would also recommend spending time in their company. Goofy little dorks; it always makes me feel lighter when ours comes up sneezing and play-bowing to try to get me to play with her, and there's something contagious in the way they so totally throw themselves into playtime. And I think that's key - no matter what you decide to do to engage your playful side, you've got to throw yourself in wholeheartedly. No worrying about how you look to other people, no internal monitoring over whether what you're creating is good enough or not, no being only half-there while part of you continues to worry about that thing that guy said to you at work yesterday - play for the sake of play, with a joyful heart, like a dog or a kid. It's an art, and one that's highly worth picking up.
posted by DingoMutt at 5:30 AM on September 17, 2014

For me, contra dancing is adult play. I think physical things feel more playful because at some point you forget to be self-conscious because you're too engrossed in the movement to worry about it -- and suddenly you're having giddy fun. See also: frisbee and aimless bike rides.
posted by obliquicity at 9:16 PM on September 18, 2014