Death, Dying and processing things as a five year old.
August 30, 2014 6:08 PM Subscribe
Help me talk to my five year old child about death age appropriately. We've talked about Fred Rogers. We've talked his feelings. We've talked about what he knows about it. He's concerned because his great-aunt died about a month ago, and now he wants to make sure we'll always be there. The problem is, in very short time his grandfather, my dad, won't.
posted by Nanukthedog to Human Relations (12 answers total) 15 users marked this as a favorite
So without belaboring it. This evening I answered a whole host of questions on - will I help him learn to drive? Where do we go? Will I die? Will he die? What happens when we die? When will I die? How many is 100?
We talked about living long lives, eating healthy, taking care of ourselves. We talked about people being real sick (his aunt). We talked about and watched Mr. Rogers talks about death - which was riveting and good for him (he relaxed a ton while watching it). We finished on a high note, talking about hot air balloons, helium balloons, ionized particles, sublimation, thunderous clouds, wind kicking up at night, how to navigate a hot air balloon and a host of historical early aeronautical events... but he went to bed somewhat back in the 'Don't die Dad' mode that he skewed post-dinner conversation towards. This would all be fine.
Except his grandfather is dying. As in, I ignored a phone call from the hospital during this conversation because that's how much my son needed me. And while we don't need to rush to that tomorrow, its looking like the chances of that happening with in a year are an increasing possibility. He hasn't gotten to see his grandfather in about a year because we don't live particularly nearby and certain things with his health are problematic for encountering a five year old. He may know I'm on edge over this, but he's not acknowledged that he knows.
As a side note: We're not really a religious family, although he knows that we prayed for god to take his aunt's pain, and eventually thanked him for her.
So yeah. This topic isn't going away after tonight. When he broaches it again, what might I add? What might I tweak? And yeah, I could write previous previous previous - because reading prior threads somehow still doesn't cover it.