Not taking care of myself out of spite?
July 10, 2014 3:14 PM Subscribe
I realize I am not taking care of myself properly and I think I may be getting fatter and slacker to spite my partner. What is this type of behavior called and what specific techniques can I use to overcome and thwart it?
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (13 answers total) 12 users marked this as a favorite
When I am single and living alone, I take pleasure in exercise, eating right and moderating my intake of indulgences. I do these things for me. But once I enter into a relationship, I think I transmute these healthy self-respecting attitudes into bargaining chips on the relationship table. "I will stay attractive if you fulfil X." This bargain, is of course, never said outright to my partner.
'Cutting off my nose to spite my face' has long been in my nature. In hindsight it has cost me. Now it is going to cost me a long healthy life and personal appeal if I don't break this twisted unconscious habit.
Please help me articulate this problem and find ways to control it.