My girlfriend snooped through my phone. Now what?
June 27, 2014 3:30 PM Subscribe
I found out my girlfriend snooped through my phone. I don't know how to proceed.
posted by hobodeluxe to Human Relations (47 answers total) 7 users marked this as a favorite
Some context: we've been dating for approximately 8 months. She's 28. I'm a 32 y/o male.
She opened my text messaging and mail apps while I was showering this morning. Upon seeing that those were not the most recent apps I opened before leaving my phone on the kitchen counter, I asked her about it. She denied it, saying she forgot my password — lying to my face.
I didn't push it further at the moment because I had to leave for work. I texted her later in the day telling her I am hurt by the fact that she's lying, and I wanted to discuss this further. She apologized, and wrote she didn't want to discuss it later because she wasn't feeling well. I haven't responded.
I feel hurt because not only does my privacy feel violated, but I feel worse regarding her lying about the snooping when asked.
She has also been acting very insecure recently — she accused me of checking out another girl last weekend, and if I am out with friends, she's sure to text me often. It appears as if the more time passes, the more possessive she becomes.
I think I am being naive here, and expecting that she will grow out of this behavior. I don't want to end things with her, but I am feeling more and more conflicted about this relationship, and if she can't be honest with me then will be no future. I am also feeling somewhat suffocated by this behavior.
Does the Hivemind have advice on how to proceed?