My houseguest will be staying for weeks but doesn't have spending money
May 30, 2014 1:56 PM Subscribe
I agreed to let a friend from out of the country stay with me for almost a month this summer, but now that the visit is getting closer, she has been mentioning that she doesn't have any spending money. Help me make sure this doesn't become my problem!
posted by Neely O'Hara to Human Relations (43 answers total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
A little backstory: I met my friend (we'll call her Angie) 5 years ago, while I was living overseas with my now-ex-husband. I was unhappy in my marriage and in the other country, and Angie and I bonded over how miserable we were about living there. She was a huge help and support to me, especially in navigating the language and the culture, and was really my only friend there.
Five years later, Angie is still in the same country, while I have since moved back to my original home in the US. Around six months ago, Angie asked if she could stay with me in my apartment for a few weeks this summer, along with a friend of hers. I live alone during the summer while my partner is away for work, so I thought that it would be a nice way to thank her for all the help she gave me when I lived overseas, as well as have some company while alone in the house. Also, she stayed with us for a few nights two years ago, so I figured I knew what to expect.
But as soon as she booked the flight, she posted on Facebook that she basically made the decision on impulse, saying that "being bipolar can get me in trouble", and that she has no idea where she's going to get the money to afford her expenses while she's in the US. And now that the visit is next week, she's been posting almost every day about how much she can't wait for her vacation, but "I still have to figure out my finances" or "I just hope I have enough money to get through my visit".
All of this has been on Facebook - she hasn't said anything to me personally at all about her finances. But she's been tagging me in these statuses - because she's so excited to visit - so she knows I know. But I don't know if I should bring it up to her when we discuss logistics for her arrival. It's not like she's asked me for money, or to pay for any expenses, so it feels weird to be the first to say something. And I don't even know what I WOULD say. But the fact that she's posting so regularly about having no money is just stressing me out, and I'd like to prevent any issues. What would you do in my shoes?