Basically, I feel I should reprimand my brother for something but I want to do it without coming across as morally superiour. this has been our dynamic in the past and it never works, not to mention the fact that I'm probably not morally superiour to him (even if it feels that way cuz I'm his big sister!)
My brother (23) is on a long backpacking trip in the US with his girlfriend, posting photos on facebook intermittently. The other day he posted a photo of himself in Chinatown in a big US city. In the photo, he's wearing what looks like some sort of traditional Chinese hat with his hands in prayer position, and the caption is "Nei-ho". This seems pretty sleazy/ racist to me.
The photo has over 50 "likes", and 12 comments. I commented "What, pretending to be Chinese?" And he replied "haterrr". There are two other people (both women) who commented that the photo is "awkward". But he leaves the photo up.
I'm disappointed because normally my brother is very socially aware, sensitive and empathetic and before he left he promised me he'd try his best to be culturally sensitive throughout the trip.
I did send him a facebook message saying if I were him I'd take it down. Because a few weeks ago he posted about how sleazy is was for Macklemore to wear traditional Jewish clothing
and dress up like Jewish person. That's why I'm so disappointed now, because I thought he knew better.
At the same time, I do find sometimes I overstep my role as big sister and wade into mother territory with my "suggestions" / judgments of him. I know I can't make him take it down, but it really bothers me that he would post that, and also I'm worried about what other people will think of him. But, I know I'm not perfect either (and so does he... . all too well) so how do I approach this without seeming judgmental
-Should I ask someone else to talk to him about it?
- Should I just try to forget about it?
-Is there any justification / reason why what he posted isn't racist/ extremely sleazy?