How to deal with a group member whose drinking is becoming a problem?
May 18, 2014 12:35 PM Subscribe
Last Friday, it became clear that a member of a group that I'm in has drinking behaviours that may be becoming incompatible with being in the group. I can see several ways to proceed, but any advice is welcome - especially if you experienced something similar and tried something that worked.
posted by rjs to Human Relations (13 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
This member of our group - let's call him X - tends to show up for meetings looking dishevelled and slurring his speech. On more than one occasion he has fallen asleep during the formal part of the meeting, snoring loudly, and this also happened last Friday.
After the formal part of the meeting there were snacks and drinks, as is usual for our group's biweekly meetings. There isn't a bar, wine and non-alcoholic beverages are set out on a table and after one or two formal toasts everyone helps themselves to whatever they like. Except for X, people pretty much tend to do this in moderation. On Friday, I overheard comments from one person and got comments from two other people, all remarking on X's excessive alcohol intake during the evening. I didn't witness this myself, since X is a smoker and spent most of the evening standing outside while I spent most of my time indoors, but when talking to him during the evening I did notice that he seemed to have trouble being coherent. At the end of the evening, around midnight, X pretty much begged those of us who were still there to go with him to a nearby bar for "one last drink".
X lives within walking distance of the place where the group meets, so he should be able to get home afterwards without endangering others or himself. Nevertheless, continuing to go down this road doesn't seem like a good thing for anyone involved.
I can see several ways to proceed, but, as I indicated above the fold, any advice is welcome - especially if you experienced something similar and tried something that worked.